to you OP. You do not need to apologize for anything. People come on these boards all the time and talk about their families, their problems and everything else under the sun. That's what the boards are for. 
There is nothing wrong with being sad at the loss of the relationship with your brother and trying to work through some of that on the boards. We feel how we feel KWIM?
Try talking with your brother. I hope that you are able to get the help you are looking for and that you are feeling better soon. I will say a prayer for you.
to you.
Browneyes, you don't need to apologize. I know you miss your brother and feel alone. Even though your doctor is out of town, maybe there is another doctor in that group or a number you can call to see an available doctor who will be covered by your insurance. I think it's important that you see someone and talk about your feelings.
I think a good start is to talk to your boyfriend when he gets home. Then please find a number to a doctor covered by your plan. But like Sadie said, if you cannot find someone, you can call your mental health center.
Everything will be ok. We all get overwhelmed with life from time to time. The important thing is getting help when you need it.
You can try urgent care also, they may be able to help refer you to someone. It really helps to talk to people.
