Anyone watching Purity Balls on TLC?

[DznyLvr2005]

WOW.. I only saw 6 minutes so far and I'm totally amazed at how wierd this is. It's one thing if you want to be pure or whatever, but it seems very odd the whole father/ daughter relationships these people have. Girls as young as 5 attend these balls... FIVE!? SHould they even know what that is yet?

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I was slightly interested, took one look, and quickly changed the channel!

FWIW, I am a participant in the True Love Waits program and had to beg my father for a purity ring when I was 13 (how backwards is that? He didn't want me to make a commitment I would regret). If a girl or boy wishes to pledge purity when they are old enough to understand it, that is fine. This is just a little too creepy for me though.

 

[clarabelle]

I watched a few minutes and it is weirding me out.
I can't keep watching
I do think there is some merit in the concepts (parents being involved, daughters not needing to rush into early sexual experiences for some kind of self esteem boost) but I feel that these people are taking it a step further than what I would be comfortable with.

 

[maidenfairy]

Do they have purity whatever for the boys? The whole thing creeps me out. Just teach your kids what your family believes and trust in them.

 

[DznyLvr2005]

The more I watch, the more I realize that it seems the kids don't even know what they're talking about. It's like they are repeating just what the parents are telling them. The narrarator said soemthing like "why do you want to stay pure?" and the girl said "it's one of the ten commandments" The lady then asked "what commandment tells you to stay pure?" "The commandment they said it was, was you should not commit adultery." And then the kid made up some thing that totally didn't make sense, saying something like , well if someone gives themselves away then later you marry him, it's like he cheated on you"... WHAT!?

 

[aprilgail2]

The whole thing is just totally creepy- the last thing I would have wanted to discuss with my father was my sex life!!!

 

[PlainJane]

Do they have purity whatever for the boys? The whole thing creeps me out. Just teach your kids what your family believes and trust in them.

I don't think so; they do have purity rings.

I'm a conservative Christian, and I find the practice a little weird (Purity Balls that is).

 

[Caribbeanprincess]

I'm watching right now and I'm totally disturbed by this show. The more I watch and the most disturbed I am. This is what I wrote on my LJ just a minute ago.

Anyway, I wanted to comment on this show i'm watching on TLC about Purity Balls. Now, first off i'm a very focused Catholic with my faith and God, however, I believe in a little liberty when it comes to religion, as I believe faith is the most important thing before anything else. This show i'm watching has disturbed me greatly. I really do no mind people that make Purity pledges, I think it's lovely and wonderful that they want to do that compromise with God and that they have the strengh to resist all temptations. I think it's wonderful and I support it. However, I believe that is the decision of every individual to make. What I find to be incredibly disturbing is father's pretty much manipulating their young daughters into these pledges with unrealistic expectations about love. I believe virginity is a very precious gift that shouldn't be given away lightly, however, touching, holding hands, kissing, not dating at all; how can you take away these incredibly important details away from a relationship? How are these girls suppossed to find the right man if they won't even look around a bit for him? He's not going to magically appear.

I don't know why, this show has disturbed me greatly and I wanted to express my opinions on the topic. I'm sorry if I've offended anyone that does these type of pledges, I didn't mean to. I just wanted to express my opinion on it.

 

[sdarwkcabemanmy]

DH is watching something else..Knight Rider or something (he TiVo'd it because he was at work) so I'm planning on taping the repeat that's on at 11.

The whole concept fascinates me, tbh, because when I was growing up there was no such thing as a purity ring or a purity ball. Heck, my parents never even talked to me about sex...everything I knew I learned from school or the dimestore bodice rippers I would read under the covers at night with a flashlight.

It does seem a little odd to me, but that's why it fascinates me so much. Because it's something I was never involved in and probably never will be, since I do not (and do not plan on having) a daughter.

What do they do for the boys though? There is so much emphasis on the GIRLS staying pure. What about the boys? Do they have purity balls or formals or whatever too?

 

[soupy11]

I can't handle this show. It is creepy! I would run screaming from one of these events!

 

[Liberty Belle]

I just can't get past the title.

 

[marquettedis]

The problem I have the most with the balls is that it is pure or nothing. They are not taught about protection and contraception. Studies have shown that those that made a pledge are more likely than their peers to contract a STD or become pregnant. Also they only wait on average 6 months longer than peers who made no pledge.

 

[nuke]

I loved the kids lining up for their father's blessing. That guy is on a power trip big time.

Weirdest show I've seen in a while.

 

[Pigeon]

There is something seriously twisted about these fathers.

 

[DznyLvr2005]

I loved the kids lining up for their father's blessing. That guy is on a power trip big time.

Weirdest show I've seen in a while.

EWWWW I know!! that was gross, it almost seemed like he was getting a little too intimate with his children!!!

 

[java]

I watched 5 minutes and got so creeped out I had to change it.

As someone that lost my virginity thanks to being raped, I have serious issues telling girls they need to be "pure". If I could go back in time I would have much prefered the first time to be with my boyfriend of 3 years.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I watched 5 minutes and got so creeped out I had to change it.

As someone that lost my virginity thanks to being raped, I have serious issues telling girls they need to be "pure". If I could go back in time I would have much prefered the first time to be with my boyfriend of 3 years.

 

[prettyprincessbelle]

I'm watching this and I am weirded out. I was brought up with saving myself for marriage but no no way in the shape and form these girls are. This is way extreme.

I agree with the PPs about the girls just repeating what they hear their Dad's say. It's like they have no idea, it's sick..

 

[Sleepy]

I think it is unrealistic to make such expectations of your children. It is one thing to ask them to wait until they are mature and old enough to deal with issues related to sex (pregnancy, etc), but to expect a person to wait until they are married is a bit extreme. What if the person never wants to get married? What if they are 30 before they get married due to life goals, etc? Just seems strange to put a ring on a person's finger and tell them they can't have sex until they have a marriage certificate.

I wonder how many of these people making such demands on their children actually waited until THEY were married before having sex. Wonder how many of them had the same demands made of them and they got married young so they COULD have sex.

 

[bicker]

I suspect those who didn't wait would claim that that gives them special insight into why it is important to wait. Of course, it doesn't. If parents could be prepared in advance for the life that they're going to usher into the world, parenting wouldn't be considered a hard job.

It seems to me that the percentage of people for whom this very creepy (IMHO) practice actually is beneficial in some way is pretty darned small. I think a few things are needed to make this more relevant to reality: This must be a promise girls make to themselves, not to anyone else. Subjugation doesn't help them; empowerment does. Also, they need to switch parents.... girls should make this promise to themselves with the support of their mother, not their father. Furthermore, the time horizon is unnecessary, and destructive. A specific age is more realistic, with the understanding that that would be an age at which the young woman would be more mature and can, at that time, make the decision whether to continue the promise or let it lapse.