Anyone send kindergartener on time instead of holding back?

[cigarboo]

I've read a lot of posts about holding back a child from kindergarten when they have late birthdays/birthdays close to the school cutoff date. It seems the over whelming majority choose to hold back when their child's birthday is within 3 months or so from the cut off. I'm not looking for reasons/benefits for holding back a child since it seems it has been discussed extensively in other threads. I'm just trying to find input from people who have actually sent their child to school on time even though their birthdays were close to the cut off. For the people who do have a child who is "younger" in class, are you finding any issues or regrets because you DID send your child on time and do you have to deal with anything differently? I sent my son with an Oct 29 birthday to kindergarten when he was 4, turning 5. He's doing fine. Just would like to hear other people's experience and if they have any advice to offer.

Thanks

 

[teachrfuture]

I taught Pre-K and I have taught Kindergarten. I have noticed that children born in the summer months and start school "on time" seem to struggle more. I don't know if this is due to maturity or what. Understand that this is not a given. You know your child best.
Ask yourself:
Does your child know his letters and sounds, colors, and shapes?
Can he write his name?
Can your child recognize numbers to at least 10?
Can he sit attentively for at least 20 minutes at a time?
Is your child able to be away from you for extended periods of time?

These are just a few of the things we look for when deciding if a child is ready to move on to kindergarten. Ultimately, it is your decision.
Hope that helps.

 

[MindyLuvsMickey]

We are not quite at the point where we need to worry or think about it yet, as our son is only turning 3 in August. However, it is already on our minds. His birthday is August 26, well within the cutoff limits, so I think we'll be sending him. He will be one of the younger kiddos in the class, but he already knows everything the PP mention, with exception of being able to write his name. he is only 2, so I'm sure that will be accomplished long before the time comes.

i was an early starter in kindergarten. I have an october birthday, so I started at 4 and turned 5 shortly thereafter. I had a VERY hard time with separation. I was, and still am, a very emotional person. That was my only difficulty. I think I turned out fairly normal!

 

[crazy_for_the_dis]

My daughter has a July birthday, and the only difference I can see is a different maturity level between her and her friends sometimes. Then I remind myself they are almost a year older. Academically, she has always been a straight A student. I don't regret sending her on time. It never crossed my mind to not send her on time.

 

[Denine]

We have friends with a daughter with a September birthday and they sent her to K "on time" and she is doing quite well.

Our DD is going to be 5 the end of September and we are going to Home school her this year. If we weren't, I would be holding her back.

 

[KMZOB]

I was younger than all my friends in school. When I went to school my parents pushed me in. I did very well in school, always at the top of my class. I do think that it was hard socially sometimes in high school when friends got their licenses and stuff. They were also allowed to do things that I couldn't do. My parents didn't allow me to do certain things until I was a certain age...unfortunately that was about a year after all my friends could do those things. I don't think in the long run it hurt me at all...but I am glad that when DS goes to kindergarten he will be 5 1/2.

 

[gower525]

My son has a September birthday and started Kindergarten on time last year. He was still 4 for the first month of school. He did great. As others have said, only you know if your child is ready. If you think he/she is, then trust your judgement. My biggest concern was his fine motor skills. He had none! That has completely turned around, however. He had a wonderful year and is now an eager 1st grader!

 

[StephMK]

I have no advice but we're getting ready to send him on time. DS's bday is 6/28 & he'll start K on 8/13. I haven't considered holding him back much because he is big for his age, already reads, knows his numbers, counts to high digits, etc. However, he hates to write and is starting a phase of being more wiggly & not listening as much as usual. He did great in PS so I'm assuming he'll get past the rest & do fine.
My only question is when do you draw the line on being too young or just accepting that someone in the class has to be the youngest? I do hope we're making the right decision by sending him so I'm glad to see your post!

 

[SnowWhite12]

Each child is different. My sister's birthday is October 4; she was valedictorian of a class of 322. My other sister is August 15; she was val. of class of 256. My b-day is in July, and I graduated 3rd in a class of 365. We all started on time. I think it can be sad for a child to start late because if for some reason they have to be held back later on also, then they are WAY older then the other kids. And that causes some very adverse effects. This happened to my husband. He ended up graduating 2 years older than everyone else, and he was always too embarrassed to tell anyone his true age. (His mom kept him out a year before K, then he was retained in 3rd grade.)

 

[Minnie_me]

Our cutoff date is December 1st. I sent both of my DDs - midSeptember and midOctober birthdays.

They're both doing FINE.

As a teacher, I can tell you a couple of things. If you walk into a Kindergarten classroom in the fall, you can usually identify those late birthday kids. But by 3rd grade, they're indistinguishable.

BUT.....I'll also tell you this: I've had parents tell me that they regretted sending their "late birthday" child, but I've NEVER had parents tell me that they regretted keeping them home.

Not much help, I know - -- sorry! You know your child best. Good luck!

 

[janets]

My son will turn 5 on 7/25 and has been in daycare/preschool since he was 5 months old. He has no separation anxiety, knows his letters and colors, can count to high digits, etc. He is socially well adjusted and is eager to go to big school. I can't see anything that he would gaine by staying another year in daycare (since I work, it's not 2.5 hours of preschool but full day care). While he doesn't write well, he does know his name, his address, the names of all members of the family (even extended), etc.

He is also a second child. He wants to do everything big brother can do. So on Sept. 6, he'll be in kindergarten.

 

[Darcy03231]

DD's birthday is 8/19. I sent her to kindergarten on time and ended up having to hold her back in first grade. She was really struggling and I didn't think it made sense to send her on to 2nd. Best decision we ever made. She's now a freshman in high school, in all honors classes and gets straight A's. She just needed that extra year. Some kids go on time and do fine.

 

[WantToGoNow]

My son turned 5 in May and started Kindergarten in August. He did just fine and will be going to 1st grade in the fall. If you think you're child is ready for Kindergarten, I wouldn't hold him/her back just because of when the birthday falls. If I would have kept my son back, I'm sure he would have been bored to death -- academically, he already knew what he needed to for Kindergarten.

 

[Pinnie]

I live in MI and our cut off is 12/1. I sent my 9/22 son on time and it was a BIG mistake. He could always do the academic work but he always was a year behind his peers socially. In middle school, gym was a nightmare for him with teasing and being one of the last ones to develop physically. He had to always have a ride to school events because he was the last one to drive. That can be a tremendous issue. He graduated at 17. He told me once that by graduating early it means he has to work ONE extra year before he can retire.

If I could do it again, I'd let him grow another year.

I became so involved in this issue that I teach a Young 5s class for our public school system. Our state funds the program so there is no cost to parents. The program has grown so much, we now accept out of district students.

pinnie

 

[girlsx4]

Two of my girls have "late" birthdays.(Aug. & Sept) Our cutoff is Sept. 30th They were both 4 when they started Kindergarten. Neither of them went to preschool. They both did GREAT in Kindergarten. I was really worried because one of them struggled a bit early on, but I worked with her and she "caught" up with everyone else.
I think it really sucks that everyone holds their kids back because it makes the kids that go "on time" seem like they are behind, ya know what I mean? One of my girls was in the 1st grade this year(she is 6) she had a classmate who is 8! My other DD is 8 and in the 3rd grade! I couldn't imagine my younger DD classmate being in my older DD class. I really think kids tend to act like their grade, not their age. Does that make sense?
My youngest DD is 9 days past the cut-off. She already knows most of the letters and can write some. We might test her to go early......we'll see.

 

[Starr W.]

Actually I was worried about my eldest son being the oldest in his class(8/29 birthday). First day of school in first grade they made a graph of their ages(I think it was for the teacher, she really disliked having the younger kids, she wanted a 7/1 cut off) half the class was already 7!

My niece just made the cutoff by 2 days and she has struggled ever since(going to 7th grade). She started in ADK 5 days a week and had never really done preschool and it's been a struggle ever since. She had been in public school (they wanted to hold her back, but SIL said no, so she's off to Catholic school this year).

 

[MSSANDRA]

A lot of states are changing their cut off dates so that might be somthing to remember when making a decission. NC just changed from a Oct16 cut off to a Aug 31 date.

I am no help as I held my son back. We have friends that sent late birthday kids and some of course do well and some do not. One such child was great for kindergarten but could not keep up in first grade. Another however had a horrible time adjusting to K, but once she got over that has excelled . I do however agree as a pre-k teacher I have never had a parent come back and say they regreted holding the child but have had MANY come back and say they wish they had followed my advice to hold them back.

 

[suttlesboys]

I live in Kentucky and the cutoff date is Oct.1st. My oldest son's birthday is Sept. 26th. We waited to send him to the next year. He did great and is a straight A student going into the 5th grade next year! My youngest son's birthday is June 22. We went ahead and sent him! BIG MISTAKE!! We are now going to have him repeat 1st grade next year! I so wish we would have waited to send him! It would have been so much easier than telling him now he's going to repeat ! It breaks my heart, but I have to do it now! Our principal at the school said they tell anybody who asks,if you have a boy with a late or summer birthday, DONT SEND THEM! It makes such a differnce in boys to be a little older. If you're in doubt don't send him . Good Luck

 

[disneyjunkie]

We lived in NC when my son started school. The cut off was October 16. His birthday is October 5. It never occurred to me to hold him back.

I moved back to NY when he was in the 3rd grade. Here the cutoff is December 31. When I registered him for school, they didn't even ask to see school records from NC. They asked what year he was born in and said "ok, he belongs in the 3rd grade."

Tomorrow is his last day of 10th grade. He has never had any issues academically or socially. He's been at the top of his class every year.

 

[teachrfuture]

Our cut off date is Sept. 1. My son was born Aug. 31. I held him back. I don't think he even knows. He thinks that it is great to be older then some of his peers. He will be able to drive before most of them.
Believe me, I stressed about sending him on time or not. I feel that for him, it was the best decision. He is at the top of his class .
My daughter was held back in 1st. She was born in April. We put her in kindergarten the day after we brought her into our home(she and her sister are adopted). We had no idea how she would do. I wish that we would have let her start kindergarten the next year. She is very aware of the fact that her "old friends" have moved on without her. She has caught up and is now doing wonderfully in school.
As I stated in my earlier post, you know your child best. Just be aware that if later they need to be held back, it will be much more dramatic for them.
Please, be open in your decision if the teacher tells you that your child would benefit from being held back. Don't think that just because this happens that the school is labeling your child. Teachers just want what is best for your child.