Another update on "I am beyond livid with the teacher"

[Erin1700]

Can you believe it??? Another update on the bully with the ice who did the pinching...

This girl is on DD's swim team so we still see her. They are in different lanes so they dont really interact during practice. The mom happened to say something to me about her DD still being a little upset that my DD got her detention. Sorry, maybe I should have bit my tongue, but I could not.

I said "Your DD got herself detention when she pinched my child in the face" She was not too happy with me, but I just walked away.

Also, on the first day of swim practice, there were a few new kids there. Obviously I didnt know the parents and they didnt know me. (they dont go to the school). I was sitting with my window cracked and they were standing a little bit aways talking while they waited for their kids.
One mom said to the other "Oh, so and so told me to keep my kid away from bully girl. do you know which one she is? My friend said when they wait for school to open she runs around like a lunatic and throws grass, snow, etc in kids hair before school"
Of course I said nothing, but it just made my mind up that I am not wrong about this girl, she is bad news!!! So sad for an 8 yr old!!

 

[Disney Doll]

Yes it is sad for the kid, because, quite frankly, she's 8 and has parents who are clearly not addressing her behavior. If she has special needs issues, then they should be working with the school etc. to get her into the proper programs, get her an IEP and so forth, so that she has consistency and learns proper behavior.

If she doesn't have special needs, then she's just a brat who has been allowed to be a brat because of her parents inattention or lack of desire to "parent".

My crazy SIL is like this...when her kids were young, her excuse was "Well, he's only 3" (or 4 or 5 or whatever age he happened to be at the time). Well, you know what, I KNOW he's only 3, and I don't expect him to be perfect, but when he misbehaves I expect YOU, the PARENT, to correct his behavior. She never corrected her younger son's behavior and I swear, the kid is a psychopath without a conscience. I know that is strong to say about an 11 year old, but if I told you some of the stories about things this kid has said and done, your hair would curl! I can't imagine what he'll be like when he's 20. At the very least, he will be the outcast who no one likes because he is socially inept because he has never been taught proper behavior....and I don't mean etiquette, I mean things like you don't slap someone when they have a toy you want and then look at your Mommy who says "Oh that's OK...you got frustrated because Billy took your toy and you're only 3". I keep telling my DH that someday he & I are going to be on TV talking about how we knew our nephew would turn out to be a serial killer because of how his crazy mother raised him.

Kids are very cruel...no one likes to hang around with a jerk.

 

[Wishing on a star]

WOW

And what is really sad, and upsetting, is that the mom doesn't even see it.

Judging by the way she called you, and even talked to you again, blaming you and your child, THE APPLE HASN'T FALLEN FAR FROM THE TREE.

 

[Frantasmic]

What I think is befuddling about these types of kids is that the parents are obviously excusing their behavior, which indicates that they get all sorts of attention. So, why do they do further attention-getting behavior (which bullying is a form of) outside the home? You'd think these kids whose parents dote on them would get enough attention.

 

[Erin1700]

I just can't believe I misjudged them. Better to know now then later, I guess.

I had to tell my DD to stay away from this girl. I could see if my DD thought up some plan that got them both in trouble, that may cause the mom to think my DD got her kid detention, but this kid acted alone. She physically hurt my kid and 2 others!

 

[FayeW]

Yes it is sad for the kid, because, quite frankly, she's 8 and has parents who are clearly not addressing her behavior. If she has special needs issues, then they should be working with the school etc. to get her into the proper programs, get her an IEP and so forth, so that she has consistency and learns proper behavior.

If she doesn't have special needs, then she's just a brat who has been allowed to be a brat because of her parents inattention or lack of desire to "parent".

My crazy SIL is like this...when her kids were young, her excuse was "Well, he's only 3" (or 4 or 5 or whatever age he happened to be at the time). Well, you know what, I KNOW he's only 3, and I don't expect him to be perfect, but when he misbehaves I expect YOU, the PARENT, to correct his behavior. She never corrected her younger son's behavior and I swear, the kid is a psychopath without a conscience. I know that is strong to say about an 11 year old, but if I told you some of the stories about things this kid has said and done, your hair would curl! I can't imagine what he'll be like when he's 20. At the very least, he will be the outcast who no one likes because he is socially inept because he has never been taught proper behavior....and I don't mean etiquette, I mean things like you don't slap someone when they have a toy you want and then look at your Mommy who says "Oh that's OK...you got frustrated because Billy took your toy and you're only 3". I keep telling my DH that someday he & I are going to be on TV talking about how we knew our nephew would turn out to be a serial killer because of how his crazy mother raised him.

Kids are very cruel...no one likes to hang around with a jerk.

Is she a single mother?

 

[krcit]

Good for you for speaking up! Maybe it'll open her eyes(but I doubt it, lol)

 

[daisax]

What I think is befuddling about these types of kids is that the parents are obviously excusing their behavior, which indicates that they get all sorts of attention. So, why do they do further attention-getting behavior (which bullying is a form of) outside the home? You'd think these kids whose parents dote on them would get enough attention.

But they're not (always) looking for attention -- sometimes they're looking for limits. Limits make people feel safe. Living your life without feedback (or only positive) has to be pretty scary, I should think. Especially once you're old enough to realize that everybody else seems to live by some weird system of "rules" that you don't understand.

 

[Disney Doll]

Is she a single mother?

No, but her husband is a wuss.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Doesn't matter to me whether she is a single mother or not!!!!
I certainly hope that there are those who are searching for more rationalization and excuses for this behavior.

Disney Doll, how do you know the husband is a wuss????

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

Good for you OP for standing up to this woman!

On a side note, the girl that's been bullying my DD has invited all the girls in the class to a sleepover. There are only 6 girls total (counting bully). One girl doesn't go to any parties as she is painfully shy, DD said she isn't going AT ALL, one girl is on the fence, one has a family commitment so that leaves one classmate in attendance. DH said he felt sorry for her. I said "You reap what you sow." I got glared at. Sorry, the kid is turning 9 and old enough to know her actions cause harm. Sorry, but you make my kid cry at recess by being so mean and you expect a freakin' gift for it. I don't think so.
DD asked me if she "had to go". I told her she didn't have to attend any party she didn't want to. Her response "Good I'm not going! can you tell her mom please." I hate bullies!!

 

[FayeW]

Doesn't matter to me whether she is a single mother or not!!!!
I certainly hope that there are those who are searching for more rationalization and excuses for this behavior.

Disney Doll, how do you know the husband is a wuss????

My question was based on the comment about "how his crazy mother raised him". I take exception to the mothers always being blamed and the fathers getting a pass.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Ohhhhh, now I understand...

You weren't talking about the OP's bully's mother.