An honest "surprise" or am I just not telling my husband?

[SuzieQMomof3]

So today I put a reservation for a long weekend in April at HHI. My husband just got a promotion and I thought I would surprise him with the trip. Then I got to thinking...am I really surprising him or am I just not telling him for fear he will try and talk me out of it. We're doing a major renovation on our house since we had a fourth child. We're planning a vacation in the Outer Banks this July and we've booked a trip with my brother and his family at SSR in December.

But I really want to see HHI (we've never been) and I got a great rate of $159/night for a 2 bedroom villa. I've read it's a lot like Wilderness Lodge which is his FAVORITE resort so I'm thinking he'll be excited about this too.

Especially when he comes home from work and I have the kids and the suitcases packed in the car waiting for him.

So am I being a kind thoughtful wife or am I keeping something from him.

Where is that fine line between secret and suprise???

Any thoughts?

 

[ClarabelleCow]

With everything on your plate, I would tell him! If you were using points, I would surprise him, but the fact that your paying per night, I would definately tell him!

 

[shelbyjosh]

Oh gosh! I went thru this back in 2000. I planned a surprise 5 day anniv. trip for DH and I. Boy did that backfire on me! He refused to go without the kids even though my dear Grandmotherly neighbor would stay with them and make sure they were well taken care of. He wouldn't budge. We were using points at OKW. Instead of losing the points and air tickets I just bought 2 more plane tix and we all went. Wasn't my idea of a getaway that's for sure. If I were you I would tell him. Men are not very receptive to things like this!

 

[diznygirl]

well, you can't have a surprise without a secret!

We are at OKW right now for an impromptu getaway. DH was nice enough to not call me crazy when I told him about the reservations. But he did tell me tonight that it did cross his mind! BUT he thinks I was right, and we needed this mini-vacation, and now he is glad I made the reservations.

Perhaps this same scenario will play out with you and your DH.

 

[mouseclick1]

I have often thought of "surprising" my DH with more HH points, but always chicken out!

 

[rocketriter]

Years ago, my father would occasionally come home early on a Friday afternoon and say to my mother, "Throw some stuff in a suitcase. Let's spend the weekend in Manhattan." And off they'd go!

 

[ForTheLoveofDisney]

Kind of off topic but, coming from a woman's point of view, I would love it if my DH did something like this for me.

I've done something like this (in a very small scale) for him when we first got married and I couldn't tell if the attitude I was getting from DH was that he was uncomfortable with not having any preparation or that he could just care less. He thought when I picked him up from work that we were just going home but we didn't.

I've never done anything like that again (because he didn't seem to like it) but would certainly LOVE it if he did it for me! Of course I hope he'd get my sister to pack the suitcase for us because Lawd only knows what I would get otherwise??

 

[OneMoreTry]

I think you already know the answer to this. It comes across in the question itself and your original post.

Tell him. Maybe it'll plant a seed in his mind to surprise you some time.

 

[lllovell]

Kinda surprised by what people think because I would NOT tell and just surprise him!!! My hubby hates making the travel plans of any sort, so it is always up to me, so he is a very go with the flow kinda guy and would not have a problem with it at all (especially if we were sans children for a weekend of surprise). You know your husband best. Can he handle sudden changes in plans or does it upset him? If it upsets him, I would not keep it a secret. If he is kinda free in planning and experiences, then surprise him

Either way I hope you have a blast!

 

[lillasmom]

I think I would tell him. With the trips you have planned and your reconstruction, there are enough things going on anyway. I would hate to get to the dates and have him refuse to go, especially on cash.

Good luck.

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

Thanks for all the replies-they are great!

Like ForTheLoveOfDisney, I would really love it if my husband were to surprise me with a trip anywhere-even just an evening out! but we've been married 13 years and it hasn't happened yet.

rocketriter, isn't that a great memory you have of your dad sweeping your mom off her feet for a weekend away?

My husband is really an easy-going sort of guy and I'm sure he'll "play along" and have a great time. He's just so practical, that if I asked him about it, he would come up with a million reasons why we shouldn't go. But we've been working so hard lately and everyone needs a get-away, don't they?

Maybe it's just the approaching Valentine's Day, but I'm in the mood to do something special.

 

[lllovell]

My husband is really an easy-going sort of guy and I'm sure he'll "play along" and have a great time. He's just so practical, that if I asked him about it, he would come up with a million reasons why we shouldn't go. But we've been working so hard lately and everyone needs a get-away, don't they?

I think you are on the right track. I love the old saying "easier to ask for forgiveness than get permission". It sounds like it might really apply here if he would find reasons NOT to go and yet you are sure it would be a good thing and ok financially.

And I NEED A GET-AWAY!!! Can I come?

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

lllovel, you won't be getting any sympathy from me! You're going to Disney World in 51 days! Have a great time at OKW-I love it there.

"easier to ask for forgiveness than get permission".

I think that's going to me my new motto.

 

[lllovell]

I am so bad aren't I? We just got home from a short trip as well. *sigh* I just want more more more!!!

I am really looking forward to going "home" for the first time. Taking some friends with us and really going to do a "slow down" trip and try to enjoy DVC and all the wonderful things while taking it a bit easier at the parks! We will see how it goes

 

[Granny]

If I were you I would tell him. Men are not very receptive to things like this!

Gee, painting with a pretty broad brush there!

You may feel free to surprise me with a trip to HH any time! Actually, that offer is out there for pretty much any of you!!

 

[auntsue]

I can't believe I've never heard that saying before, "easier to ask for forgiveness than to get permission." I often live by it. My former principal always called me "the master of the fait accompli," because I would often do things first (like stencil my classroom, etc.), then be found out after it was already done.

I'm torn on my response. I love the idea of surprises, but your plate is so very full that it may just be one thing too many. Only you know how your husband might respond. In the exact same cirumstances, I don't think mine would respond all that well. JMPO.

 

[disney junky]

If it works just to do it as a surprise, do it. You know your situation best and it sounds like you've thought it all out. Go for it.... If I came home to this kind of surprise, I'd be on my way with tears of joy in my eyes!!!!

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

Well, I wanted to keep it a surprise, but I told my husband about the trip on Valentine's Day. He had gotten me and our girls flowers and I got him some of his favorite chocolate. He looked at it, and it took 20 seconds (yes, I counted) for him to "absorb" the idea of the gift and finally be happy about it.

So then I thought, "If this is the way he reacts to chocolate on Valentine's Day, how will he react to a mini-vacation?" So I told him. He was very happy about it and we got to tell the kids so it all worked out in the end. Thanks to everyone for being my sounding-board.

Susan

My husband and me:

 

[lillasmom]

That's great! I'm so glad that he was happy and you got to enjoy the moment. Have a great time!

 

[bobbiwoz]

Me too, I'm very happy for you!!

Bobbi