Adopted families?

[mom2kazkids]

I was thinking about this before I saw the thread about adoption financing. I am an adopted mom to two awesome kid from the Republic of Kazakhstan, and I was wondering who else out there has had the oppurtunity to build there family thru adoption.

When we were at WDW in May we spent sometime with a family with a daughter from Russia. Since we have adopted, I am amazed at the number of families that I meet that are shaped with adoption, either domestic or internationally.

I have to also say that I love this board, here I thought that since our trip was over I would stay off the board, yeah right. Now I find this community board, and have a whole new world to explore. Also, I have to stay on top of things for out trip in May of 2007.

Barb

 

[happybratpack]

I am in the process of adopting from Guatemala. Just from meeting people online I'm SHOCKED how many adoptive families are out there and how positive and supportive total strangers are. (sometimes more supportive than friends and family have been)

 

[Sandy22]

I'm in the process of adopting my almost 17 month old daughter. It's been a long and difficult road but hopefully she'll be home soon! I refuse to reset my ticker....she just HAS to be home by then. She was supposed to be here last March.

 

[ForTheLoveofDisney]

I'm in the process of adopting my almost 17 month old daughter. It's been a long and difficult road but hopefully she'll be home soon! I refuse to reset my ticker....she just HAS to be home by then. She was supposed to be here last March.

We are just starting the process. We have completed our registration and are awaiting the home study.

Can't wait until our family becomes 3!

Sometimes I feel like it's never going to happen but I know that all good things come to those who wait.

In the meantime hugs to you all who are waiting to grow our families via adoption.

 

[Pugdog007]

How do you all decide what country you will adopt from? Just curious.

 

[Dan Murphy]

LOng time adoptive family here, Vince is almost 28, Natalie going on 25. Goodwishes for all those thinking of or in the process, it is worth it.

 

[Holly]

My eleven year old daughter is adopted. We adopted domestically through fostercare.

 

[Tantorini]

We are, in more ways than one!

My husband was adopted domestically as an infant.. and we just came home from Russia with our two sons in June...

Sandy - I *so* empathize with you, we were supposed to bring our boys home in February.. but due to gov't changes in Russia we had to wait longer, and so we finally got them home in June! The wait was miserable, but they are SO worth it.. now I can't remember a time before them!

We decided on Russia after doing a lot of research.. basically we knew we wanted to adopt two children at the same time.. and there aren't a lot of countries that allow that... and also we have both always been fascinated by the Russian culture.. and knew it was something we could enjoy together as a family.

Standing in Red Square with my new sons was a feeling unlike I've ever had before..


Good luck to those in process... Oliver and Reid make everyday worth the horrible wait! I'm sure your babies will too!

 

[mamajoan]

Adoptive mom here.... I know you all have probably answered the following question more than you would care to but

Why did you choose to adopt international vs domestic? (eta.. sorry up late last night when I posted.. )

Thanks!
mj

 

[Michie]

Adoptive mom here.... I know you all have probably answered the following question more than you would care to but

Why did you choose to adopt international vs national?

Thanks!
mj

I was going to ask the same thing.

I was adopted by my mother and father when I was a wee one.

 

[mom2kazkids]

How do you all decide what country you will adopt from? Just curious.

I did a lot of searching on the internet about the different countries, length of time to complete adoption, and time in county. DH and I went around in circles between Kazakhstan (had never heard of it before but one trip), Russia (two trips) and Ukraine (select child once in country). We settled on Kazakhstan because of the one trip, and at the time we adopted about a three week trip. Also all of the information that I read on the adoption program in this county talked about the low ratio of care givers to children. By chance we found out that one of the guys in the shipping dept where my DH worked was getting ready to leave to adopt two kids from Kazakhstan, so we looked into the agency that they were using and went with them. I figured someone that we know going thru the process would be a great resource.

Why did you choose to adopt international vs national?

Thanks!
mj

I liked the quickness of the process with adopting internationally. Our adoption was 8 months and 5 days from start to finish. I also think that at this time domestic adoption can be a process of having to sell your self and hope that you are picked by the birthmom. The other part that we felt more comfortable with was the great big body of water that separated us from the birthmom, and knowing that she would never come to take the kids away from us.

Barb

 

[Pugdog007]

I also think that at this time domestic adoption can be a process of having to sell your self and hope that you are picked by the birthmom. The other part that we felt more comfortable with was the great big body of water that separated us from the birthmom, and knowing that she would never come to take the kids away from us. Barb

So do you meet the birthmom at all and were you able to select the children before traveling over there?

 

[mom2kazkids]

So do you meet the birthmom at all and were you able to select the children before traveling over there?

The birthmoms of our kids gave up there parental rights and both kids were in a baby house (orphanage). We had referrals (pictures and medicals) of both of the kids when we traveled. So we for the most part knew who we were adopting. Our kids are nonbiological siblings, and are 10months apart in age.

 

[Sandy22]

Why did you choose to adopt international vs national?

Thanks!
mj

Several reasons: I live in Canada and there are far less children available here in foster care awaiting adoption as there are in the US.

Adopting under the age of 2 was also important to me and the only way to make that happen here is for a birth parent to choose you in an open adoption. As a single parent, I know my chances of being chosen are slim as there are plenty of married couples also waiting to adopt.

Open adoption was not something I was comfortable with. Oddly enough, now that I'm adopting internationally I have decided to establish some contact with the birth family (distance adds to my comfort level). I plan on sponsoring the family. I just cannot, with all good conscious, let my child's birth family live in absolute poverty.

In adopting domestically (more so in the US than in Canada), there can be issues of maternal drug/alcohol abuse or the children are severely neglected and/or abused. The flip side is that children raised in an orphanage may have various attachment disorders and questionable medical histories (if any). Adoptive parents have to make a decision as to what challenges they are best equipped to deal with.

Another reason is that like many other adoptive parents, I felt a pull towards the country I'm adopting from. Parents may feel that God led them to that country, or they may have descendants or friends from that country, or they may have travelled there in the past. Sometimes it's just a matter of what countries your adoption agency works with.

All children around the world are equally deserving of being adopted. I know some people are of the mind-set that we should take care of our own first. Well by all means then, those people should go ahead and start adopting domestically. Personally, I think all of the earth's children are "our own" regardless of where they live.

I know there are other reasons but I'm too tired to think of them right now I'll check back in tomorrow morning.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

We adopted our 3 year old son through our local county foster agency. He was considered a hard to place child because of his leukemia, so it was a fairly simple process as we didn't have to jump through as many hoops in order to get him placed with us. I'm not worried about his birth parents ever locating him because all his records are sealed by the court, his name and social security number was changed, and even the birth parents names on his birth certificate were changed to our names. Although I totally understand the reasons to adopt internationally, and applaud anyone who does so, it's very sad how many local children there are, mostly ages 2 and up, that are stuck in the local foster systems, waiting for homes. Our social worker told us that about half of these kids will never find permanent families. I wish that we could give more of these poor kids a home, but we just can't. It's not easy to adopt an older child - everyone tells you this, but I didn't believe it until we got Matthew. It's been difficult at times, the bonding process takes a little longer and requires a bit more effort, but when he gives me a big hug and says "I love you mommy", it makes it all worth it!

 

[inthemood]

We are adoptive parents!!! One international (DS6) and One domestic (DD5).
Our DS came to us @ 1month from Belize and our DD @ 3 months.

I truly believe that these children were meant for us!! We fit together so perfectly, its amazing.

ITM

 

[chrissyk]

We're going to adopt internationally in a few years. DH prefers to adopt an infant, so that limits the countries that we can choose from. My mom and sister are supportive of our choice to adopt, as they have always known that I wanted to do this (since I was a teenager and a family in our church adopted from Korea). They are begging me to "choose" a girl, though Other family is not so supportive, but will come around I'm sure (or not...then that's their problem).

Can you tell me if you can adopt an infant from Khazikstan (sp?). Also, is the adoption program there pretty stable? I know that Russia's program has had some delays lately.

 

[kdibattista]

How do you all decide what country you will adopt from? Just curious.

I have done a lot of reseach over the past month and we have settled on Kazakhstan for a couple of reasons. I really like having the required 2 week bonding period between the parents and child/children; it seems to be a shorter process then other countries (about 8 - 10 months beginning to end); most children are in very good health; infants as young as 6 months old when you can take them home... I know people may think it's selfish that we want an infant but I want the bonding process to be as easy as possible and feel that can happen with an infant.

Why did you choose to adopt international vs national?

Honestly, I would be afraid every day of getting the knock at the door from the birth parents wanting their child back... I just couldn't deal with that. Plus you hear many horror stories of failed domestic adoptions... I would be a nervous wreck!!!


We hope to have our little miracle home by next spring/summer. We already have her name picked out!!!

 

[mom2kazkids]

Can you tell me if you can adopt an infant from Khazikstan (sp?). Also, is the adoption program there pretty stable? I know that Russia's program has had some delays lately.

Children adopted from Kazakhstan need to be at least 6 months old. More poeple that adopted infants being them home around 7-9 months. Our daughter was 8 months when she came home, and our son saw 18 months.

Per the agency that we used, I think they keep saying that there might be minor bumps in the road, such as most regions of Kaz not waiving a second 14 day waiting period after the court, once you already had a 14 day bonding period, making the trip longer than when we adopted in 2001, they do not think that there would be any major disruption of the program while the current president is in office, as he and his wife support the adoption program.


Barb

 

[Crankyshank]

not adoptive parents, but DH was adopted and we're looking at the possibility of adopting internationally in a few years.