A few questions from someone who's new to all this...

[Pezalicious]

I've lurked here a ton and there's so much good information here. Thank you all for sharing your plans so openly. It really helps those of us who are just thinking about plans. I've posted here once before, but was a bit scared off because of a couple of replies I got. You see, I'm not officially engaged yet (and I guess that made the couple people think I'm jumping the gun), but money is a big reason behind that. Though it's not official, my boyfriend and I are starting to save our money for our wedding and future, and we've talked tons about what kind of wedding it will be, and things of that nature. So, while it's not completely official, there's no doubt in my mind that we'll both be tearing around the parks with our wedding ears on at some point in the future. We plan to move from San Francisco to Philadelphia in 2 or 3 years and definitely want to be married long before that happens.

Anyway, I hope nobody minds if I pop in here once in a while with questions. None of my friends are any good at this, and some of the thoughts going on in my head can drive me crazy. I'm quite the planner, too, and like to know everything far in advance. For example, I took my mom to Disney World for a 10 day vacation when she turned 50 - it took me a year and a half to plan everything (as well as save!)!

I guess I've rambled on enough, so I'll get on with the questions.

1 - How did you pick your wedding date? My boyfriend and I met in November, but we decided to pick a different date as our anniversary. I rationalized it this way - "Your birthday is Oct. 22, Halloween is right after that, Thanksgiving is in November, Christmas in December, then we've got New Years, my birthday on January 9, and Valentine's Day - there's already so much to celebrate, plus it's pulling our money in so many directions!" He loved the idea of changing it, so we decided to pick a day neither of us could forget: April Fools' Day. The problem with that date is, if we got married on it, we'd be right smack in the middle of spring break with crowds I wouldn't want to deal with. I also don't want the weather to be overly hot (I'm a very delicate flower ), so that cuts out a lot of months. So what determined your wedding date? Was it an anniversary? Crowds? Weather? When family and friends could travel?

2 - How did you decide who to invite? I very much want a small wedding, but my boyfriend has a lot of friends and family, and the day isn't only about me. So I'm trying to figure out ways to please us both. Then there's the issue of money - an intimate wedding is so much more affordable than a big one.

3 - Do all costs on your wedding day go towards the minimum expenditure? For example, I was thinking of renting a bunch of water sprites to zip around on for an hour. Would that go towards our minimum if we were to do a custom wedding?

 

[B2B-2008]

Don't worry about not being officially engaged yet. I had only been with my DF three months when we decided to get married. It then took us a while to save for my engagement ring. Sometimes money can hold you back but there is no problem with planning.

We picked our wedding date after we had booked our trip to WDW we knew we wanted to be in Florida a few days before we got married so we picked the Wednesday in the middle of our two week stay. I wish it was to do with memorable dates but it will be our memorable date in the future.

Invite wise we have just asked our close family, parents and brothers and sisters. We also asked a friend each but we are not sure if they can join us.

I'm not sure about the wedding costs. I was told if I get my nails done on the day of the wedding that could go towards the minimum but I didn't ask about water sprites.

 

[caryndisneydiva]

1 - How did you pick your wedding date?

2 - How did you decide who to invite?

3 - Do all costs on your wedding day go towards the minimum expenditure?

hello! i remember your previos posts, i think the boards have changed a bit since then...anyway, to answer your questions, here are my thoughts:

1. i originally wanted a december wedding! i love christmas and really wanted that, but we got engaged in july and that wasn't enough time for everyone to plan and there was no way i was waiting another year...we're too old...so then we decided on january, my birthday is in feb (day after v-day) and i didn't want to get screwed out of a wedding anniversary also...so january 24 it is.

2. i have a HUGE family, so i just invited my immediate family and friends, df is doing the same, though his family is literally 1/10 the size of mine...

3. i think that food, flowers, photography, videography, transportation (limos and charter buses) and venue fees are what go towards the minimum, i could be wrong about that though...

 

[BaBeeCee14]

Hi! Welcome back to the boards!

You shouldn't feel bad about stopping by to ask questions even if you aren't officially engaged yet. Everyone here is so helpful! I just recently got engaged myself and I still have so many questions after lurking here for the past few months.

Anyway, I'll try to answer you questions the best I can...

We are planning our wedding for December 2008. Both DF and my birthdays are in December. At first I wasn't sure if I should have it in December because I we already have something to celebrate in December. But then after thinking about it, I love being in Disney in December and I love how its decorated for Christmas. The other thing that has made me want to keep it in December is that DF thought of having it the exact same day I did. 2 days after my birthday and 2 days before his birthday. So it just seemed right. Ultimately it is your wedding day and you should pick whatever day you feel is right.

We are having a custom wedding. Our families are too big for an intimate wedding. Intimates do save a lot more money, but for us we would rather have all of our closest family there (which is more than 18).

I'm not sure if the water sprites can count towards your minimum. Maybe if you are giving them out as favors during your wedding they will..that is assuming they are purchased from Disney. If you are using Disney floral, catering, cake...all those things will count towards your minimum. We are going to have a dessert party after the reception which, I was told can be counted towards the minimum as well. Almost everything you have purchased for you wedding day from Disney can be applied towards your minimum.

Hope this helps!

 

[Kristen14]

Don't listen to whomever was mean to you before! I started planning well before I was engaged, and there's quite a few brides on here who've done the same thing! If you're in the stage of your life where you're settled and you make every decision with your BF, then you know if marriage is in the near future or not. My DF and I discussed it for months, shopped for rings for months, and then he had it hidden in our bedroom for months! Of course nobody knew this but us, and my mom thought I was going nuts with the wedding planning without having a ring. While a surprise proposal is always nice, in this day and age, I think most girls have an idea that it's coming soon. So congrats on your early planning, and welcome to the club!

To answer your questions:
I live in florida so we had to automatically rule out hurricane season (June thru November), then March, April and May are filled with spring breakers, and since we live in florida, its totally nuts everywhere around then. That left us with December, January and February. Both our parents got married on December 26 (weird huh?), which is a Wednesday this year, and with all the holidays we thought that it would be a bit difficult, so we picked January 26th, which is a Saturday, to honor our parents. They've both been married for over 25 years, so 26 must be a good number

We're inviting 100 guests, my family is small so i invited all them, and my close friends. DF's family is HUGE so we cut it to his 1st cousins and other family that he's close to. I wanted to do 25 guests each, to have 50 total, but that just didnt work out I would definitely have had an intimate wedding if I could have!

Not sure about the water sprites, but i'm leaning towards no. I didnt have a problem meeting the min at all! There's just so many fun things to add to it... and the WP Itself is 2,500. The rest we pretty much met in food!

 

[yearbook50]

When we decided to have an intimate wedding, we decided to have it at Sunset Pointe. Sunset Pointe is only open from October to March now. We wanted to wait until after I graduated college, so we were down to January to March. Then between jobs & such, we figured February would be best. So we picked the last friday of value season - 2/8/08

It works for us.

 

[Pezalicious]

Thanks for the welcome and info!

I was kind of intimidated to come back here, but now I see that I was just being silly. I've been thinking a ton about weddings and our future in general, so I can't stay away. Tony and I kind of mapped out our life and ran a budget of the next 5 years - holy Mickey, we sure are an expensive couple!! Since marriage (and a honeymoon) is the first thing on the list (followed by a new car, a move, new furniture, and getting settled into a new place 3000 miles away - that's all at once - and not long after that, popping out a little one), I've been thinking TONS about money, which makes me questions types of weddings, and more specifically my dream wedding vs. what's practical vs. what's fair (I really don't want to cater only to my wishes). Thinking about the next 4 or 5 years gets really overwhelming and I can't help but to start planning now so I'm not bombarded with too much in the future.

 

[hiwaygal]

I wouldn't worry too much about the "not engaged yet" thing. One thing I've learned here on the DIS is that you have to grow a little thick skin!

I had to laugh at your thoughts about the wedding date...you kinda sound like I did. Picking a date was hard for me. DH's birthday is in March, mine is in July. We met in December and were engaged 2 years later on Christmas. We figured that we pretty much had a celebration every quarter...except one. So we chose September 20 as our wedding day.

Invitations weren't hard for me. Both DH's parents passed several years before we met and he really doesn't have any family. My family lives pretty far from us so it was really difficult for anyone to travel...especially in late September. In the end we had a very intimate ceremony...just us!

You could always do something very intimate at Disney and have an "at home reception" later. My brother and his wife were married in Jamaica (he planned it as a surprise for her) and they had an at home reception for everyone about 4 months later.

Not sure about the water sprites...although the "rule" I've heard is that everything you do on your wedding day does count toward your minimum. I haven't heard of anyone doing water sprites though. You would definitely have to ask your coordinator.

 

[JonetteA]

Welcome! We are so glad you are here. We started planning before we were official as well. I knew we were going to get engaged, but I knew I needed the planning time. I didn't send the deposit check until we got engaged though! =)

We chose our date based on when school was out or close to it for everyone. Also it worked out really well that we wanted to be outside in the UK Pavilion and the Flower and Garden Festival was going on. We did not spend alot on decorations during this time.

I am not sure about the water sprites. I know that they do say "anything on your day" is the general rule. I am not sure that this would count. I would check with your planner or your sales manager.

 

[Lisella]

Welcome (back) Pezalicious!

I'm new here, too and loaded with questions. I am officially engaged but we have not set a date as we are saving money, paying for the ring, and trying to figure out what we want to do. Anyhow, everyone I've "spoken" to on here has been great so far. And I am so addicted to the planning journals and trip reports.

So you've led me to a question - what of this minimum? Are you referring to the Escape package? I thought the prices were the starting price and then any extras or upgrades just increase that price? Does anyone know how to explain?

Thank you!!

 

[caryndisneydiva]

Welcome (back) Pezalicious!

I'm new here, too and loaded with questions. I am officially engaged but we have not set a date as we are saving money, paying for the ring, and trying to figure out what we want to do. Anyhow, everyone I've "spoken" to on here has been great so far. And I am so addicted to the planning journals and trip reports.

So you've led me to a question - what of this minimum? Are you referring to the Escape package? I thought the prices were the starting price and then any extras or upgrades just increase that price? Does anyone know how to explain?

Thank you!!

for custom/wishes weddings there are minimums that you have to meet depending on when during the year you have your wedding!

 

[Lisella]

Originally posted by caryndisneydiva
for custom/wishes weddings there are minimums that you have to meet depending on when during the year you have your wedding!

Thanks Caryn, but I'm still curious. Are these minimums on top of the $4000 (or $5000 for the WP) 2008 Escape starting prices? I guess I am wondering what some couples truly end up paying for a small DFTW, reception. Just trying to get a handle on the whole thing before we make any decisions.

Thanks!!!

 

[hiwaygal]

Thanks Caryn, but I'm still curious. Are these minimums on top of the $4000 (or $5000 for the WP) 2008 Escape starting prices? I guess I am wondering what some couples truly end up paying for a small DFTW, reception. Just trying to get a handle on the whole thing before we make any decisions.

Thanks!!!

For Wishes (custom) weddings the minimums vary:

PREMIUM SEASON - October/November/May/June
REGULAR SEASON - March/April/July/December
LOW SEASON - January/February/August/September

MINIMUM EXPENDITURE

Monday - Thursday
Premium Season: $10,000
Regular Season: $10,000
Low Season: $10,000

Friday & Sunday
Premium Season: $20,000
Regular Season: $15,000
Low Season: $15,000

Saturday
Premium Season: $25,000
Regular Season: $20,000
Low Season: $15,000

The prices of Escape (Intimate) weddings are "intended" to be all inclusive but with add-ons and extras you could easily meet the minimums for a Wishes (custom).

 

[mla1977]

Lisella,

I was just talking to the Disney Wedding people yesterday. The escape wedding is more of a package deal, whereas the Wishes wedding is kind of a la carte. You pay your site fees, food, flowers, etc. For an Escape wedding, your meal is not included for your escape wedding, and you will need to purchase more champagne since you only get one bottle.

I've been thinking about it, and I estimate that it will cost me about 6-7k for an escape wedding, but for a few thousand more, I can have a lot more of my friends and family there. In my case, I will probably end up with Wishes just because I really want more of my family with me. However if my one cousin with her 6 kids (yes, 6, and she is younger than me!) decides not to come, I may cut it back to an Escape and include less family.

Oh yeah, I haven't been asked yet either. We have been together for 5.5 years now and have owned a house together for 1.5 years now. DM has all but said that the question is coming. If I hadn't told her to shut up, I'm sure she would have blurted it out. (see my post in Summer's TR) I've set up my wish book to try to sort out my ideas. I've also been calling Disney Weddings with my questions too!

A Disney wedding will probably be cheaper for me since I can cut out all of my second cousins. My parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and first cousins come to 30 people already. If I have something local, I would really need to invite everyone, and then we are talking over a hundred!

Sorry to hughjack your thread! I hope I could answer some questions for you!

 

[Pezalicious]

mla - I'm torn between an escape and a custom for the same reasons as you. I keep thinking it'll cost way more than the $5000 for an escape wedding, so for just a little bit more I can cater it to exactly how I want it AND invite more people, too. But sticking to the minimums for a custom would be really hard.

The other issue when I think about all this is that my boyfriend has a larger family and a lot of close friends. Over the last year I've cut out most of my close friends because they're all so gossipy and dramatic, and too many have back stabbed each other (stealing fiances, cheating on friends for a threesome, etc). Even though they're all in their 20s or 30s, they act like they're in a slutty, no morals high school. It was a really hard decision to distance myself, but it's definitely been for the best. I also don't have a close family and would really only want my mom there, and someone to be with her to help her keep her emotions together. I doubt my 2 brothers could afford to come. I also haven't talked to my father for 8 or so years, which means for my side it would be my mom, and probably my aunt. My boyfriend's side would be overloaded with people. I'm not sure how comfortable I am with that, but it's his day, too.. it'll be so hard to make these decisions!

 

[mla1977]

After my last post, I tried to figure out if I could even do an Escape wedding. I could cut out all my cousins and some friends, but the only way it would really be possible is if our godchildren weren't there. It is still 18 people! We could both only have 4 friends there (BFFs and their spouses). Here I am allowing myself to get stressed about this! I know that once I get the ring, plans will be full steam ahead. The only real problem that I think we will have is that the people who would end up being Matron of Honor and Best Man are both teachers. I really want them with us, so we would need to plan around their schedules.

 

[twiu]

Wow. You guys are all so lucky. Want to know how I picked a wedding date? Well, I didn't have a choice. My mother is a feng shui consultant and I knew that I would not have a choice on the matter. She had to consult with her "numerology" friend in New York and she took my birthday and time of birth, my fiance's time and date... and then they did some sort of chart and they gave us a bunch of dates and times that would be auspicious. This of course, was quite difficult, because Disney is booked months in advance!!! My first choice of date was September 28, 2008. Not too hot, not too cold, Sunday so it's cheaper... but it wasn't available. My mom actually told me to use my Disney "pull" and ask to move the other couple Isn't that funny. First of all, being a castmember doesn't give me any pull. Also, even if I did have some clout, I sure wouldn't do that to another couple. Anyway, we finally agreed on August 31, 2008 but we had to have it at 7:30 pm. I would have preferred an earlier ceremony but I had to keep it where the feng shui masters were content.

Anyway, at the end of the day, I don't really care. I just am happy to be getting married and to be getting married at Disney. I'm just nervous because it's the end of August and it is hurricane season... wish me luck!

Good luck on picking a date. Let me know if you want me to get your birthdates and times and send it to the numerology lady in New York. Oh yeah, it also costs about $300 to get this done. Nice, huH?

 

[hiwaygal]

Wow. You guys are all so lucky. Want to know how I picked a wedding date? Well, I didn't have a choice. My mother is a feng shui consultant and I knew that I would not have a choice on the matter. She had to consult with her "numerology" friend in New York and she took my birthday and time of birth, my fiance's time and date... and then they did some sort of chart and they gave us a bunch of dates and times that would be auspicious. This of course, was quite difficult, because Disney is booked months in advance!!! My first choice of date was September 28, 2008. Not too hot, not too cold, Sunday so it's cheaper... but it wasn't available. My mom actually told me to use my Disney "pull" and ask to move the other couple Isn't that funny. First of all, being a castmember doesn't give me any pull. Also, even if I did have some clout, I sure wouldn't do that to another couple. Anyway, we finally agreed on August 31, 2008 but we had to have it at 7:30 pm. I would have preferred an earlier ceremony but I had to keep it where the feng shui masters were content.

Anyway, at the end of the day, I don't really care. I just am happy to be getting married and to be getting married at Disney. I'm just nervous because it's the end of August and it is hurricane season... wish me luck!

Good luck on picking a date. Let me know if you want me to get your birthdates and times and send it to the numerology lady in New York. Oh yeah, it also costs about $300 to get this done. Nice, huH?

I'm really sorry you had to go through all that but

 

[disprincessatheart]

I was an avid lurker for 2 years before DF finally popped the question, so don't feel like you're the only one trying to gather up information and be prepared to "officially" start planning - that's what this site is all about!
Even after a couple of years on this board, I still learn new things and want to change my plans around.

Ok, beyond that the one thing I can tell you is that the Wishes wedding minimum does NOT include anything you spend on your wedding day - I thought the same thing in the beginning. The only things that count are the things that DFTW will set up and bill you for - everything else is extra outside of your minimum. Hair and spa services, water sprites, etc do not count.

Hope that helps and welcome.

 

[Pezalicious]

Wow, I'm surprised hair and spa services don't count. I was always under the impression that they did.



When the time comes, and if I haven't had some other sort of idea that I love, I'll talk to my planner. Right now I'm trying to think of some sort of fun way to trash my dress. I doubt they'd let me on a water sprite in my wedding dress, but if I put on a life vest, I was hoping they might go for it.