EsmeraldaX
DIS Legend
- Joined
- Aug 7, 2003
- Messages
- 14,910
Let me preface this by saying, I am not a troll. I am not looking to stir debate. I am mostly just venting.
Due to the subject nature of this post, the court system & child molestation, some readers may be prone to debate. This is really not meant to be a debate. And I should also state that I think people who molest children are the lowest scum on the earth and should be locked away. That is, the ones who really do molest children...
I have recently changed a major, major political view of mine and the following story is the reason why. You may ask why am I posting this in a public forum? The reason is simple. It is the only thing I can do now, to hopefully get people to think very , very hard about things when and if they are ever called to a jury.
The view I have changed is that I used to think all people in prison were there for "good reason". As in, innocent people don't just get picked up, (what were they doing there in the first place?!?) , tried (evidence?!? Obviously if there's evidence they are guilty right!?!) and sent away (Good riddance!).
I now know that this is not true and I am just so angry and sad right now that I feel like venting here is my only option. Sometimes people are accused by people they know of things they did not do. The accuser's really DO sometimes accuse people because they are angry at them and want to ruin their lives. A lot of these cases are never tried because legal fees cost a lot and prosecutions can scare innocent people into pleas they shouldn't take. And sometimes, truly innocent people do get sent away.
Do I know for a fact that the person in the following story is innocent? No. I don't. No one knows that except him and his daughter. How sure am I that he's innocent? I would give my life that's how sure I am. My hope is that had his case gone to trial, a jury would have seen right through the lies he's accused of, but he opted for a plea, and he opted for a plea for what I think were honorable and noble reasons.
The story follows...
Last year a dear friend of ours started his divorce. He was married to a violent, possessive and sometimes downright scary woman. He could not even go to our house without being accused of sleeping with me?!( Um, he's my boyfriends best friend and has never been unfaithful to his wife, at least not with me...). This woman , who my friend should not have married in the first place IMO, has been on drugs, drinks heavily and when my friend was at work, often left their two young children unattended while she did things like go shopping or out with friends. My friend has never touched drugs, nor does he drink any more than the occasional wine with dinner. He claims his wife was like that to, before they got married.
She did not want this divorce and made it quite clear. She said and I quote "If you divorce me, you will pay. You will pay and you will never see the children again so help me". My friend could have gotten at least 3 people to testify this in court.
Unfortunately, these 3 people would also under oath have to admit that the assisted my friend in leaving the house a few years ago for a short time, the first time the couple separated which my friends lawyer thought would hurt him in court.
A few days before the divorce was to be finalized, she approached my friends father. She told him , in what he described as an almost joyous tone of voice, that she was going to accuse my friend of molesting their 4 year old daughter and that the daughter was going to be told what to say in court. Unfortunately, no one else heard her say this; it would have been her word against his. My friends divorce lawyer suggested my friend just let it go.
The next day she called child services. Child services asked questions, such as when did it start , was there any physical evidence etc? She claimed it started when he moved out and that there was physical evidence (which was later said to be a heat rash by two medical doctors who told her that if asked in court they would say it was a heat rash).
My friend paid over $15K to get himself a good defense lawyer. Once his wife told social services this, the matter became a state issue. She was no longer in the picture. Even if she felt bad or guilty (she's a sociopath, so it's unlikely she did) she couldn't stop the proceedings now.
Their 10 year old son (not my friends biological child) was with my friend and his 4 year old daughter when the supposed molestation happened. He repeatedly begged his mother to stop this and screamed it was not true. The baby has been coached for over a year as to what to say and said some stuff in a taped deposition.
But when she saw "daddy" in court the other day both her and the 10 year old ran to him and begged him to take them with him and not leave them with their mother. The ten year old is now in therapy because he has taken to actually hitting his mother because "he hates her".
The prosecuting lawyer somehow damaged the tape and it was thrown out of evidence. The prosecutions only choice now, since no medical doctor would say what they wanted, would be to put the baby on the stand to say what her mother told her too. My friends lawyer was very worried that since it's been over a year, she had had no contact with her father and the poor little child probably believes her mother's lies.
My friends only hope would have been to have his lawyer basically call his daughter a liar and try to cross examine her on the stand. Or try and call the 10 year old as a witness, meaning that the prosecuting lawyer would have to do the same to him. My friend was in tears thinking about what this could do to his children (he had legally adopted his wife's son). His lawyer also told him that the jury would most likely side with the alleged victim. They almost always do. Err on the side of caution.
I used to think erring on the side of caution was the best thing to do to. Until now.
One week ago, my friend saw his children for the first time since that beast took them away from him. He got to spend 15 minutes with them, after they ran from their mother screaming for daddy to take them home and not leave them again. He told them it wasn't their fault but that he would not be able to see them for a while and that mommy would take care of them. Their grandparents then took them away and he went into the courtroom and plead guilty, feeling sick that he was lying to the judge. As he did, his wife cheered. She's the embodiment of evil, I swear. He leaves one week from today and will be doing 6 years. Hopefully he will survive. But he will always be on the sex offender list, and his life is essentially ruined. The way the judge he plead to talked to him and treated him was disgusting.
He did not want to do this. But his only other option was destroying a 4 and 10 year old by having them ripped apart by lawyers on the stand. And he refused to do that. The 10 year old wanted to go on the stand. The 4 year old was scared.
Had I not known him and just read this in a paper, I'd have said good riddance and keep him out of my neighborhood. But I saw where the accusations were coming from. I saw and heard his wife make threats, and basically say she was going to lie to get him in trouble. The selfish actions of one evil woman who was hurt over being divorced have now ruined a kind, good and loving man's life. He will never again be able to have custody of his children, he won't get to see them grow up.
His parents are trying to get full custody now because they and my friend fear for the children's safety. They are going to attempt to use her drug problems, lack of employment, leaving them home alone all the time etc. as proof that she is an unfit mother. But they can never fix my friends situation.
I am really in shock. Everything I thought I knew about the way this countries legal system has changed. An innocent man is losing 6 years of his life because of one nasty woman's selfishness and anger at him. A woman who was willing to use her own babies as pawns in her game against her soon to be ex. A woman who has been feeding lies to a baby that will scar her for life. A woman who has been trying to lie to a 10 year old as if he were a 4 year old. A 10 year old does not just believe everything his mother says. And why is she doing this? Because she knew she could. Because she knew that the system would almost always side with the "victim" just in case. Because she knew that this will affect her ex for the rest of his life and he will never forget that he wronged her. (Those were her words after the plea by the way).
I just am so angry, sad and confused right now. I don't even know what else to think.
Thank you for reading this.
Due to the subject nature of this post, the court system & child molestation, some readers may be prone to debate. This is really not meant to be a debate. And I should also state that I think people who molest children are the lowest scum on the earth and should be locked away. That is, the ones who really do molest children...
I have recently changed a major, major political view of mine and the following story is the reason why. You may ask why am I posting this in a public forum? The reason is simple. It is the only thing I can do now, to hopefully get people to think very , very hard about things when and if they are ever called to a jury.
The view I have changed is that I used to think all people in prison were there for "good reason". As in, innocent people don't just get picked up, (what were they doing there in the first place?!?) , tried (evidence?!? Obviously if there's evidence they are guilty right!?!) and sent away (Good riddance!).
I now know that this is not true and I am just so angry and sad right now that I feel like venting here is my only option. Sometimes people are accused by people they know of things they did not do. The accuser's really DO sometimes accuse people because they are angry at them and want to ruin their lives. A lot of these cases are never tried because legal fees cost a lot and prosecutions can scare innocent people into pleas they shouldn't take. And sometimes, truly innocent people do get sent away.
Do I know for a fact that the person in the following story is innocent? No. I don't. No one knows that except him and his daughter. How sure am I that he's innocent? I would give my life that's how sure I am. My hope is that had his case gone to trial, a jury would have seen right through the lies he's accused of, but he opted for a plea, and he opted for a plea for what I think were honorable and noble reasons.
The story follows...
Last year a dear friend of ours started his divorce. He was married to a violent, possessive and sometimes downright scary woman. He could not even go to our house without being accused of sleeping with me?!( Um, he's my boyfriends best friend and has never been unfaithful to his wife, at least not with me...). This woman , who my friend should not have married in the first place IMO, has been on drugs, drinks heavily and when my friend was at work, often left their two young children unattended while she did things like go shopping or out with friends. My friend has never touched drugs, nor does he drink any more than the occasional wine with dinner. He claims his wife was like that to, before they got married.
She did not want this divorce and made it quite clear. She said and I quote "If you divorce me, you will pay. You will pay and you will never see the children again so help me". My friend could have gotten at least 3 people to testify this in court.
Unfortunately, these 3 people would also under oath have to admit that the assisted my friend in leaving the house a few years ago for a short time, the first time the couple separated which my friends lawyer thought would hurt him in court.
A few days before the divorce was to be finalized, she approached my friends father. She told him , in what he described as an almost joyous tone of voice, that she was going to accuse my friend of molesting their 4 year old daughter and that the daughter was going to be told what to say in court. Unfortunately, no one else heard her say this; it would have been her word against his. My friends divorce lawyer suggested my friend just let it go.
The next day she called child services. Child services asked questions, such as when did it start , was there any physical evidence etc? She claimed it started when he moved out and that there was physical evidence (which was later said to be a heat rash by two medical doctors who told her that if asked in court they would say it was a heat rash).
My friend paid over $15K to get himself a good defense lawyer. Once his wife told social services this, the matter became a state issue. She was no longer in the picture. Even if she felt bad or guilty (she's a sociopath, so it's unlikely she did) she couldn't stop the proceedings now.
Their 10 year old son (not my friends biological child) was with my friend and his 4 year old daughter when the supposed molestation happened. He repeatedly begged his mother to stop this and screamed it was not true. The baby has been coached for over a year as to what to say and said some stuff in a taped deposition.
But when she saw "daddy" in court the other day both her and the 10 year old ran to him and begged him to take them with him and not leave them with their mother. The ten year old is now in therapy because he has taken to actually hitting his mother because "he hates her".
The prosecuting lawyer somehow damaged the tape and it was thrown out of evidence. The prosecutions only choice now, since no medical doctor would say what they wanted, would be to put the baby on the stand to say what her mother told her too. My friends lawyer was very worried that since it's been over a year, she had had no contact with her father and the poor little child probably believes her mother's lies.
My friends only hope would have been to have his lawyer basically call his daughter a liar and try to cross examine her on the stand. Or try and call the 10 year old as a witness, meaning that the prosecuting lawyer would have to do the same to him. My friend was in tears thinking about what this could do to his children (he had legally adopted his wife's son). His lawyer also told him that the jury would most likely side with the alleged victim. They almost always do. Err on the side of caution.
I used to think erring on the side of caution was the best thing to do to. Until now.
One week ago, my friend saw his children for the first time since that beast took them away from him. He got to spend 15 minutes with them, after they ran from their mother screaming for daddy to take them home and not leave them again. He told them it wasn't their fault but that he would not be able to see them for a while and that mommy would take care of them. Their grandparents then took them away and he went into the courtroom and plead guilty, feeling sick that he was lying to the judge. As he did, his wife cheered. She's the embodiment of evil, I swear. He leaves one week from today and will be doing 6 years. Hopefully he will survive. But he will always be on the sex offender list, and his life is essentially ruined. The way the judge he plead to talked to him and treated him was disgusting.
He did not want to do this. But his only other option was destroying a 4 and 10 year old by having them ripped apart by lawyers on the stand. And he refused to do that. The 10 year old wanted to go on the stand. The 4 year old was scared.
Had I not known him and just read this in a paper, I'd have said good riddance and keep him out of my neighborhood. But I saw where the accusations were coming from. I saw and heard his wife make threats, and basically say she was going to lie to get him in trouble. The selfish actions of one evil woman who was hurt over being divorced have now ruined a kind, good and loving man's life. He will never again be able to have custody of his children, he won't get to see them grow up.
His parents are trying to get full custody now because they and my friend fear for the children's safety. They are going to attempt to use her drug problems, lack of employment, leaving them home alone all the time etc. as proof that she is an unfit mother. But they can never fix my friends situation.
I am really in shock. Everything I thought I knew about the way this countries legal system has changed. An innocent man is losing 6 years of his life because of one nasty woman's selfishness and anger at him. A woman who was willing to use her own babies as pawns in her game against her soon to be ex. A woman who has been feeding lies to a baby that will scar her for life. A woman who has been trying to lie to a 10 year old as if he were a 4 year old. A 10 year old does not just believe everything his mother says. And why is she doing this? Because she knew she could. Because she knew that the system would almost always side with the "victim" just in case. Because she knew that this will affect her ex for the rest of his life and he will never forget that he wronged her. (Those were her words after the plea by the way).
I just am so angry, sad and confused right now. I don't even know what else to think.
Thank you for reading this.
