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[Pembo]

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[bananiem]

If she's upbeat then the doctors are probably thinking the babies are fine. Especially the one not on oxygen! IMO baby gifts would be perfect. She's excited about the babies and if nobody brings baby gifts that would be heartbreaking to me, thinking that no one thinks they'd make it. OTOH, if something should happen to one or both babies, it's nice to have something that was theirs. KWIM?

 

[wilderness01]

You can't bring flowers into a Nicu because of the potential for germs, i.e. the dirt, etc.

How about some lotions for her, some very small stuffed animals for them. Parents love having stuffed animals/something special in the cubicle for their babies. Or how about some lullaby music that can be played for the babies. We had one baby that just loved the disney cd, another loved a country cd and most others love the lullaby ones. Good luck. They will do just fine.

 

[mickeyboat]

Please please try to get her some premie clothing. DD was a premie, and I had NOTHING for her to wear. She was over a week old before they even tried to dress her, and the clothes they put on her were so big, she looked ridiculous, and so very small. A friend threw me a shower after Hannah was born, because I was hospitalized the day of my other shower. Another friend went to the Carter's outlet and bought two premie outfits, some premie socks and hats. It was soooo nice to be able to dress her in clothes that somethwat fit.

I might also get her a bunch of portable snacks. She will probably spend a lot of time in the NICU and it would be nice to be able to have a snack she doesn't have to pay for. Even if she can't eat it in the NICU, she can got to a waiting area or lounge. How about a book or two she might like? Some magazines. When Hannah was in the ICN, I was pumping breastmilk for them to feed to her via NG tube. Pumping is no fun, and it was nice to have something to read.

Lots of good thoughts for your friend and her precious babies.

ETA - ask your friend if the NICU will allow visitors, and if she would be comfortable having someone come. One of the things I missed was having friends and relatives ooh and aah over my new baby, because most of them were afraid to come and see her. One of the greatest pictures I have is of a good friend of mine who came to visit the day after Hannah was born. I was so touched. Another great picture is of my FIL "feeding" Hannah. He had a syringe of breastmilk pinned to his shirt, and was holding her while she was being fed through the NG tube. It was precious.

 

[KariC]

My SIL and B (notice no D's in front) had their twins at 31 weeks. The boys were in NICU for about 3 weeks. I just had a friend who had quads at 31ish weeks also. My twins were 34 weeks (and only a few hours in NICU). Being really active in a twins' club...I know MANY others, too.

My advice: PREEMIE CLOTHES. Once they can start wearing clothes, the preemie sizes seem to really help. My DD was actually having problems with body temps (only problem my twins had), and as soon as we got some preemie clothes on her, she could regulate. She kept slipping out of the hospital onesies, and her swaddling (never liked swaddling!).

Check on stuffed animals....not sure if all NICUS allow them. They are good places for animal dander and dust mites to congregate, and many babies in NICU have respiratory issues. A good idea might be for a mobile for the twins' isolette. Obviously when they are under a hood, etc., you can't use them....But later, when they are doing better, a mobile is nice. Most likely, you will only need one because most NICUs try to co-bed multiples when they can.

No flowers or balloons (especially latex balloons). A lot of hospitals are now Latex-free, so bringing in latex balloons are no-nos. Plus NICU babies can't see them anyway.

Snacks and meals are great ideas. If new mom and dad are at the hospital a lot, call and see what take-out you can bring them for a meal (or make for them). Then, you can visit with their babies while they take a break and eat. It's important for them to eat and take care of themselves so they can take care of their sweeties when they come home.

And remember, they will need even more help when the babies are at home. Meals, house cleaning, baby laundry, etc. Don't let the new mommy say no!

You are such a great friend for wanting to help!

 

[meandtheguys2]

Food for mom, and a bit of clothing for the babies. I hated seeing the naked babies in the NICU! We were making little, simple tops (rather like cobbler smocks) for my niece, and wound up supplying the place for 4 years!

 

[LakeAriel]

My son was 28 weeks and that was 30 years ago..They will be fine! Bring gifts, enjoy, celebrate!..The advice about preemie clothes is a good one..Not too many though, they grow in leaps and bounds..

 

[tcmata]

My son was born at 31 weeks- it is truly amazing seeing what the doctors can do for preemies- even the ones born before 30 weeks!

I agree a preemie outfit for each of the babies. At 3 pounds they will probably be in preemie outfits for 1-2 months. So, I wouldn't go overboard with outfits but a few would be nice. I had no clothes for my son so the outfits were a tremendous help. I would also suggest preemie size diapers, but you might want to check with her to see what brand first (or someone could exchange them later if needed). I know our hospital used the Pampers Swaddlers and we loved those.

If she is spending most of her time there (I practically lived there), maybe you can go up and spend lunch with her in the cafeteria or get take out and eat it in the lounge area. You could also make up a little snack gift basket with things like granola bars, etc. Or even a gift certificate or gift card for a place to eat nearby- the food can really add up!

Depending on how close you are with her, maybe offer to help with some errands?

One other thing came to mind... although I was there most of the time, once I was released I wasn't able to be there 24/7. We left a disposable camera with the nurses and they took pictures of him doing different things- bath or whatever. Great scrapbook pictures of those early days! We also brought in some card stock and they stamped it with his footprints which of course is in the scrapbook. Those are two things that I wouldn't have thought of myself at the time but they are awesome additions to the scrapbook that can't be recreated.

Whatever you decide to do, your friend will appreciate your thoughfulness and your support! Pixie dust to the twins!!

 

[Glynis]

My friend called this am and on Tuesday at 7 pm she gave birth to her daughters. She was only 31 weeks and labor was less than 3 hours. She taught all day, came home to relax and felt a pain and a gush. By the time she got to the hospital and got checked she was 9 cm, 42 mins later they were here.

The babies are 3 lbs 6 oz and 3 lbs 7 oz. One is on oxygen, the other is not. The hospital told her to expect them to be there at least 4 weeks. Please keep these little angels in your prayers and thoughts. My friend sounded very upbeat on the phone and said the babies are doing well.

Any suggestions on what a mom with babies in the NICU needs? I don't want to visit empty handed but flowers or baby gifts don't seem appropriate right now.

My best friend and I were pregnant at the same time. We were due 2 weeks apart in a November. Unfortunately, her baby was in a hurry, and was born on July 23. He weighed 1 pound 14 oz. Just very tiny! However, he came through it just fine. It's amazing what medical miracles take place every day.

For a while, though, we didn't know if Jameson would make it. I, too, wanted to take something, but didn't want to "jinx" his progress. I gave Peggy a gift certificate for a massage. She told me later, it was a wonderful gift. It gave her an hour away from the hospital where she was pampered and made to feel special. She suffered from guilt that the birth was her fault, and the massage helped her deal with the depression.

I'll keep these little miracle babies in my prayers! You are a good friend, and I think that's what the mom is going to need for a while!

 

[KariC]

Remember, twin mommies have less time.... I NEEDED many outfits for each, so that I didn't have to do daily laundry for two babies!!! I tried to only do a load every other day. You can blow thru (literally) 3 or more outfits a day with a spitty baby, and then double it for two!! LOL, or more, sometimes my twins would get each other's spitty up stuff on them from sharing a crib for naptime! And my daughter was in preemies for a about 3 months, and she was born at 4 lb, 12 oz. Just depends on the baby and their own growth chart (not the standards).

 

[SandrainNC]

My son was 1 day away from 32 weeks (so they count it as 31, but anyway). Definitely bring baby gifts. Those premie outfits are so teeny and cute! My son was in the NICU for 8 weeks. It was very hard! He had to stay longer to get his suck/swallow/breathe pattern down. Which took until his due date.

I don't think they can have flowers in the NICU, but if you visit her at home that would be great!

I had friends to come visit (I think only 2 people at a time can go in) and that was nice since I was there so much.

Get her some nice hand lotion. Her hands are going to be dry and red from washing them (it was for 3 minutes when I was there) every single time she enters the NICU.

Sandra

 

[GraysMom]

DS ended up in the NICU for 5 days until his body was able to regulate his blood sugar levels (he was full term and they couldn't figure out why his levels were all over). I really enjoyed people bringing in take out food for me to eat (I'm really picky and hospital food was pretty yucky and soggy). See if she and her husband (if he's there) would like a steak or some other red meat to rebuild her iron levels after the birth. I agree with the other posters who said preemie sized clothes or other baby gifts. Since she went early, is their nursery finished? Do they have the crib, car seats, changing table, etc all unpacked and put together? Could you clean her house so she doesn't have to think about it when she's running back and forth to the hospital? Depending on your schedule, maybe you could drive her to/from the hospital once a week or so (I wasn't allowed to drive for several weeks, and I didn't even have a c-section). As others have mentioned, reading materials are welcome also. I know at our hospital the doctors made their rounds at certain times every day and the parents had to leave the NICU during that time (HIPPA rules and all that) so maybe you could meet her for lunch in the hospital cafeteria or grab food and meet her outside the hospital for a break. Good luck and pixie dust headed the twins way.

 

[mickeyboat]

And my daughter was in preemies for a about 3 months, and she was born at 4 lb, 12 oz. Just depends on the baby and their own growth chart (not the standards).

Hannah was 4 lbs, 12 oz too, and came home at 4 lbs, 9 oz. She didn't hit 14 lbs. until she was a year old, and wore newborn sized clothes for a long time, too. Those premie outfits were worn a lot, and were passed down to a cousin who had premie twins.

 

[wowsmom]

It looks like lots of people have great ideas! The only other one I can thing of (that I don't remember anybody mentioning) is maybe offer to do their grocery shopping for them.

When my 4 year old was in the hospital with pneumonia, DH stayed with him and I was either there or taking care of our 18 month old. We just didn't seem to have the time or energy to go shopping. Our neighbor's husband actually offered to shop for us. (His wife was shocked - she didn't think he even knew where the store was. ) It was great coming home at night and not having worry if we had milk in the house.

 

[Kimberle]

My 8 yr was born at 29 wks. She was 1# 15.5oz, 13.5" at birth and in NICU for 8.5 weeks. We went through the typical "rollercoster". She was just under 4#'s when she came home.

I guess I'm a bit different, but I didn't use her preemie clothes much. She couldn't go out until she was 6 mths. It was easier to use the long layette gowns at home.

I had a really good "bouncer" that I loved. She was able to use it for a good 5 months. I also really loved my bassenett.

People gave my "things". What I really could have used was some home cooked meals I could have microwaved. (Like single servings I could freeze.) Seems I lived on fast food for months.

My dd is "perfect" now. She doesn't even need glasses.

 

[JoyG]

My twins were 4lbs14oz and 5lbs4oz. We had them in premie outfits for at least a month. We also found that we needed some preemie diapers at home too. You might get her a package of those.

 

[Sonya]

Good thoughts her way. I'm sure they will be ok, that is early but they have good weight.
Something to give her? I'm not sure she needs anything but a little of your time. Sit with her, it gets so lonely at the hospital. Or someone to go and get her lunch or take her to lunch. Or someone to drive her to the hospital and bring her back home.

 

[huey duey & luey]

Many good wishes for your friend

My triplets were also born at exactly 31 weeks and were in the NICU for 3, 5 and 6 1/2 weeks.

Best gifts I received were food, gift cards for diapers and formula (really adds up $$$$$) and my friend actually pais for my cleaning lady for 2 months,

It will be hard at first to go to the hospital b/c she wont be able to drive so even that will be a huge help

I used the layette gowns mostly too, much easier

 

[Pembo]

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[gradtchr]

That is great news!! I am so glad they are home.