What food (s) to bring grieving neighbors?

rszdtrvl

DIS Veteran
Joined
Jan 10, 2008
Our neighbors adult daughter passed away early this morning. The death was unexpected.

I am trying to do the neighborly thing and figure out what to bring them to eat, and when to do so.

My mom said to bring a lasagne, salad, garlic bread. But the neighbors are elderly, and spicy italian food might not be the best thing.

I was thinking maybe picking up a KFC meal to bring to them.

Any ideas? And when should I bring the meal over? Should I wait a few days or do so tomorrow?
 
Similar situation. I made a platter of chicken cutlets, mashed potatoes and a garden salad. When the holidays came I made them a tray of Lasagna. If you make a tray of something they can freeze it and have it at their leisure. Baked ziti is good too.

Sorry about your neighbor. :hug:
 
Meat loaf or a rotisserie chicken, mashed potatoes, and salad. My dad couldn't handle KFC or any fried food as he got older. Package it so that it can be frozen easily in case others have the same idea.

I think it's great that you want to do something for them.
 
I certainly wouldn't do KFC. You said they're elderly, they may be on specific diets and that stuff is insanely awful.

I think lasagna, salad and garlic bread sounds fine. That's not generally spicy? :confused3 Also lasagna can be cut up and put in the freezer if they're not up to eating it - might be nice to add in some of those disposable containers so they can easily freeze some.

I'd also think soup would be nice. If you make a nice soup, throw in a bag of frozen bake-to-order rolls and put it in a bunch of containers so they can freeze some.

Also maybe something like a coffee cake or what have you and some fruit.
 
the food anit the issue, letting them know you morn with them (by bringing food) is the key
 
I bring something like chicken pot pie, beef stew, or chicken burritos with rice and roasted corn/black beans. They all freeze well, so I just put that on the reheating directions sticky.
 
I wouldn't do KFC. That's something they could easily do themselves. I would make the lasagna, salad, and garlic bread. If you think the lasagna will be too spicy, then you can substitute spaghetti or a chicken & rice dish. I might add a dessert too. Also, I would put the items in a disposable pan and bowl.

I'm sorry about the loss of their daughter. That is very sad. It's nice of you to make a meal for them.
 
I just delivered a meal to some friends who lost their preemie twin boys. We did italian chicken breasts (much like shake n bake but with italian bread crumbs), a side of spaghetti (with just olive oil and parmesan), crusty french bread, a nice salad and dessert was brownies. I also made up some nice multigrain muffins too for snacks and breakfasts.
 
When my grandpa died we had everyone and their brother bringing spaghetti, rigatoni and things like that. Some of the other things brought were lunch meats and cheeses for sandwiches, meatloaf, fried chicken. I dont know how big the family is ( ours is huge) one thing that we needed was disposable silverwear and drinks.
 
When my father died the next morning a friend brought over breakfast food-quiche, bagels,coffee cake-things like that because they figured we would be busy in the mornings for a few days-making plans, recieving guests,going to church things like that. Out of town guests stopped by on their way into town (to ask if we needed things etc.) and we were able to offer them a bite to eat. If people stopped by in the afternoon, I was able to offer a slice of cooffee cake and a cup of coffee. It was very handy. People also brought banana bread, lasagna,ziti, things like that but really only one person thought to bring breakfast stuff and it really was handy. Now when a friend is in need I always include a coffee cake-it's a quick something when you can't sit down to a full meal. I will keep your neighbors in my thoughts and prayers.
 
I just delivered a meal to some friends who lost their preemie twin boys. We did italian chicken breasts (much like shake n bake but with italian bread crumbs), a side of spaghetti (with just olive oil and parmesan), crusty french bread, a nice salad and dessert was brownies. I also made up some nice multigrain muffins too for snacks and breakfasts.

I'll never forget the individually wrapped "bakery basket" (various muffins, danish, bagels, cream cheese, etc.) that my late husband's aunt & family sent. It was perfect those first crazy days when one doesn't want to eat a full meal, but nibbling on those got me through.
 
I'll never forget the individually wrapped "bakery basket" (various muffins, danish, bagels, cream cheese, etc.) that my late husband's aunt & family sent. It was perfect those first crazy days when one doesn't want to eat a full meal, but nibbling on those got me through.

This- muffins, cookies, parmesan sticks, finger sandwiches(a few), maybe a few grapes and a banana. light meal stuff. My girlfriends did this for me when my mom died and it got me through some days I don't remember.

A cooked quiche would be good too-not too much salt, no sugar, eggs and cheese with a little ham or broccoli. Almost any diet can tolerate quiche.
 
When my husband's mom passed away, we really appreciated the "sandwich kit" a neighbor brought over. She gave us ziplock bags full of ham, turkey, and roast beef, plus different kinds of sliced cheese. She also included a few kinds of bread and rolls. We had to feed various visitors before the funeral service, before their flights home, etc. We just put the bags on the counter, along with some mayo and mustard, and let everyone make their own sandwiches when they were ready to eat. It was so simple, but such a huge help.
 
A sandwich tray is always a good idea: different kinds of lunch meat, cheese, bread, and mayo/mustard. It doesn't require heating up and it's also something you can snack on. And not too filling if you're too upset to really eat much.

The last time I made a meal for a family like this, I made pulled pork bbq in the crockpot. Brought them the pork, bread, the sauce separate, and some veggie sides. It was simple to make and easily transportable!
 
When my in-laws died there were 2 things that were extremely helpful...paper goods/plastic disposable utensils & little ready made sandwiches on little rolls...no condiments on them because condiments eventually get the bread soggy. Simple...ham & cheese, turkey & cheese, roast beef & cheese. It was easy to just slap some mayo or mustard on and eat. Bring a few bags of different kinds of chips.

Don't bring ziti. When the in-laws died everybody brought ziti and you just get so darn sick of eating it. We appreciated the thought but it was like "Oh great! Ziti!".
 
A spiral ham is easy to go around. Easy to nibble on, easy to make a meal out of it, easy to package up and store.

You could always slice it apart for them, and bag it. Or leave it on the bone if the family is large enough to eat it.
 
I always bring a frozen container of meatballs and sausage and a box of spaghetti. They can put the container in the freezer and take it out when they don't feel like cooking which could be weeks later. Mourning doesn't just take place in the first week.
 
It has been my experience that, when someone dies, everyone brings over food, and TONS gets tossed. And most bring lasagna. If they're going to end up having people at their home, how about some paper products? Cookies or brownies, which can be served or frozen? I'd ask them if there is anything you can do for them, and make suggestions, depending upon if the services are local or out of town.
 
This is something that is always overlooked. Paper plates and plastic cups. No one wants to do dishes.
 
When I take food in this kind of situation it's always lasagna, or some kind of pasta that's easy to reheat.

However, when my Dad passed away one of my neighbors went to the deli and brought over all kinds of deli meats and cheeses and bread and rolls. This was perfect for us because it was so easy for all the family members here to make a sandwich when they wanted and without making a mess.
 

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