What do we do now?

[sweet maxine]

Good morning everyone!

I am in the midst of a dilemma over what to do about my trip plans. We have planned to leave in 19 days, as soon as exams are over for my high schoolers. I have already bought 7dPHP, have paid for a ticket for Mother to fly in from Oregon, bought meal vouchers, have PS for Chef Mickey's and 'Ohana. Now the hard part. My daughter just made varsity squad for cheerleading, and came home from a meeting last night to tell me that she is not able to go at all as her group will start practice the day exams are over. They plan on competing this year at camp (haven't really done this before) and so they need every day they can have to practice, as they will leave for camp on June 10. My daughter is the one child that loves WDW, the rides, just everything. My son can take it or leave it. He mostly likes to go to DQ and go along for the trip.

Her sponsor told her last night that it's too bad for her, and that she can't go, but I'm wondering why she couldn't miss 2 or 3 days with a weekend, and at least join us for part of the trip. I know it is important for her to learn the routines and all, but I never remember anything being said earlier about having to be here for any of the month of May. Last year they did not start practice until after Memorial Day, and that is how I made my plans for this trip.

I wish I would have known about the early practices so that I would have planned for different dates. She has soccer camp and work responsibilites for the rest of the summer (teaching swim lessons and lifeguarding). I feel so let down this morning, and I have worked so hard to plan this trip. What to do now?

 

[StitchGirl]

Unfortunately, every district is different-- they may let her go, or they may say she has to drop out of the squad...

...I know from my (very former) experience, most of the time "mandatory" practices were not very "mandatory." One person would ask for a few days away, be told no, and cancel their plans since they think they won't be able to be on the squad, and then someone else would just go and leave-- they never got kicked off!

Think about it this way-- if she was sick for three days (which is very possible), she wouldn't get kicked off the squad, right? That means that they can do without her those three days.

I think that your daughter should talk to her sponsor again, and try to figure out just exactly how important it is for her to be there for those three days, and what the repercussions would be if she were to miss. After that you guys can sit down and decide what to do!

Good Luck!!

 

[Tess]

I have a "competitive cheer" girl too. She will be entering the high school program soon and it places at the state level each year! It is intense and practices go all summer. I'm not sure how we will handle this one either. While the coaches in our school cannot "mandate" a practice that is outside the school year or on a spring or Christmas break, they can and will make you "pay" for missing.

I guess I would put the question to your daughter--"What do you want to do?" If she wants to go to WDW then, as a parent, I would have a talk with the coach about prior planning, etc. Perhaps she would be reasonable , perhaps not; you won't know until you ask. Frankly, I would expect most programs to give the girls at least a week or two off just after school release. I know the competitive cheer squads must work hard on timing and it's essential all members are there everyday. On the other hand, why can't this coach accommodate her team--they are still kids after all and not world class gymnasts competing for the "gold".

I hope things work out for you--I'm still hoping my daughter changes her mind and decides to opt out of "competitive". I don't care if she wants to do sideline, but that "competitive cheer" is dangerous work AND so catty when it comes to the interpersonal relationships. Best of luck!

 

[sweet maxine]

I forgot to mention all the work I have put into getting my rate with a code. I had to split my reservation into 3 parts just to have the discount for some of the days of our stay. I have gotten up at the crack of dawn to call CRO to check for discounts all through March and April, and I don't think I want to go through that again, even if we could change the dates. I feel like the rug has been jerked out from under me, but I also know and I have also told my daughter that there are plenty of other girls that didn't make the squad that would love to take her place. I know it is very much a privilege to make the squad, I just wish they would let everyone know some things in advance. Our tryouts came so late in the year this time, so we just didn't get much information ahead of time.

 

[eljojo]

I know the feeling! This is the second or third year we've had to change vacation weeks due to cheerleading. And the practices and camp times change every year, so it's hard to plan anything ahead! Luckily this year, I hadn't had reservations yet, but in previous years, I've lost money on hotels, etc. But our district is very strict, and if you can't be at mandatory practices, you're off the squad. My daughter was sweet and said 'that's okay. I just won't cheer this year." But I knew she really wanted to, so I just changed things around.

 

[w8ting4pooh]

Originally posted by sweet maxine
I forgot to mention all the work I have put into getting my rate with a code...I have gotten up at the crack of dawn to call CRO to check for discounts all through March and April, and I don't think I want to go through that again....I feel like the rug has been jerked out from under me...I just wish they would let everyone know some things in advance. Our tryouts came so late in the year this time, so we just didn't get much information ahead of time.

Approach the coach and lay it on the line. She's honored to be on the squad. Due to the late auditions and notice, you are unable to change unreimbursable travel plans. She'd love to stay on the squad and will work with the other girls outside of practice if she has to when she returns.

If the coach says no, then you have to decide trip or cheerleading.

I've had to change our trips SOOOOO many times for my daughter. She is in theater and every time she gets a show, my trip planning starts over. I totally know how hard it is to watch all of your work go right out the window!

 

[webray]

Why don't you take the opportunity to make this an adult only disney vacation. You will love it. I know its hard when the kids get big, and have lives of their own...been there, did that..but, you get used to it. Disney without kids is a whole new experience!

 

[sweet maxine]

Thanks everyone for your input. I'm just trying to clear the fog with my second cup of coffee!

StitchGirl, I agree about things being different for different people, and we are very much in that kind of situation here. She is just not one of the few that things are different for. Also last year we were told not to make any plans for the whole month of June...guess what happened? Nothing. As soon as they were finished with camp, and had painted signs, we had the rest of June off. I made plans for July just because of that .

Tess, I also agree about the competitive thing. My daughter attends a private school where we live, and for most of her life she has grown up with all things being competitive and catty. She has been taking all honors classes and has an on and off again boyfriend who has a BAD case of senioritis. I really felt that mentally and emotionally she needed the break, if just for a few days, so that she could regroup for the coming summer activities. Her sponsor does not have a child this age, and may not understand. I am usually a "the glass is half full" kind of person, but today it feels totally drained.

 

[sweet maxine]

w8ting4pooh, I absolutely understand about the changing plans thing. My daughter is involved in so many activities. She is a good girl, though, so I don't complain about what she gets herself involved in. I would rather have her busy with good things than to be out on these country roads getting into trouble.

webray, thanks for the idea about the adult only trip, but that is just not an option. My mother is joining us just so that she can spend time with her grandchildren that she does not get to see very often.

I did have the thought that possibly we could tape whatever the girls would be working on and she could watch the tape during her trip. This would at least allow her to spend some amount of time practicing. I guess I just need some ideas before I go to the sponsor with all of this. She was not answering her phone last night, so I haven't been able to approach any of this with her.

 

[sweet maxine]

bump

 

[sweet maxine]

Sorry for the bump, but I had some other thoughts about this situation. If I booked at a discount code for the reservation and changed the dates, would I still qualify for the discount at the new date or would I lose the discount? I wondered if I moved the dates to a week in June it might work possibly, and thought that there might be some Disney Visa discounts still out there for dates before 7/4. It appears that everyone is looking for codes for dates after 7/4, but I don't think we could go in July at all this year. We really wanted to do the EMH trial in May, and see the Epcot Flower show and concerts. We will miss so much by changing the dates, and I'm not sure at this point what the sponsor will even say. I still have not been able to reach her for any questions.

 

[crazy_for_the_dis]

I feel for your situation. I go through the same thing, but my daughter is only 8! But her district is strict that if you miss one day of mandatory camp, you are off the squad, period. Then games start the second week of August, and run every week, and if you miss a game, you are one point away from being benched. If you are then one minute late for a practice, you are benched. And this is not even a competitive squad! It is run tighter than most prisons!

Knowing this, I don't plan any vacations from August through November. Each year at try-outs, I tell her, well if you don't make it, we'll take an extra trip to Disney (she didn't make it when she tried out in Kindergarten, but has made it every year since).

I believe they are trying to teach them discipline, and that there are sacrifices needed to be made for things they really want. If they make an exception for one person, it is hard to enforce rules the entire season. I have seen them being more strict in the beginning than towards the end season, which doesn't help in your case. In the end though, I don't always know if it is worth it. But for now, my daughter loves cheering, and wouldn't have it any other way.

I agree with the post about talking it over with your daughter to see what she really wants to do. Possibly reschedule your trip for over Christmas. I know usually you can reschedule air, though there may be a fee. And since your son doesn't care about Disney anyway, try to plan a quickie trip to the ocean or something in place of this trip that he would enjoy.

 

[sweet maxine]

Well, I have made a back-up plan. I really don't think anything will change for May, so I called and tried for later in June after cheer camp is over. I think they might be a little more amenable to her leaving once camp is over. She can give up soccer camp as it is not mandatory, and possibly this will work.

I called Disney Res. # and was told I could have the FW cabins for 9 nights for AP rate!!

I am holding this reservation as it may work, and actually the discount is better. I think we had the ONZ discount before and only for a few days of our stay--had to pay rack rate for rest of stay. Now, when their meeting (squad) is over tomorrow, I will know which way to go with my plans. I just think they need to allow these kids some kind of a break during the summer, as school can really wear them down.

Here's hoping this will work out! I am excited for the great rate on my ressie!!

 

[crazy_for_the_dis]

I'm glad that it all seems to be working out! Good luck! And tell your daughter congrats on making the squad!