We leave Wednesday and I'm stressing about the cost!

[Happyinwonerland]

Wednesday we are leaving for an 11 day trip down. It will be me, DD, a close friend, and her 2 DDs. I think it will be a great trip, except our financial strategies are very different.

When I travel, I tend to try and stick with smart financial decisions. We may do 1 or 2 character meals, mixed with quick service and meals at our condo. We are not big eaters and try to stick with at least a semi healthy diet while on vacation. Eating too much junk really makes me feel awful. I tend to not buy many souvenirs, which I think are overpriced and won't be remembered. I do my best not to shop on vacation (unless I'm in a place with awesome outlets, like Gatlinburg). I earn a lot of money but I have a lot to pay for and I can't just spend freely.

My friend is one of the best people I know. She is a wonderful person and her daughters are the most well behaved children I have ever met. She is very much a free spender. She doesn't make much and to overcompensate she pretty much buys whatever she feel like until her money is gone and then is broke until payday. This is her first trip to disney and so far we have 8 character meals planned. I added it up with tip and that's roughly $800 I'll be spending just for DD and I on 8 meals. I'm trying to go with the flow because I don't want to bring down her first big vacatiom, but I really don't want to spend that much on food. I usually budget $1000 for 3 of us for our whole trip. I'll be spending almost that much on just 8 of the meals! Additionally, I know she is going to buy her girls a bunch of souvenirs. She just can't tell them no. I've been trying to prepare DD, explaining to her that we don't need a bunch of disney stuff because we go so often, and we might not get as many toys as the others do. But she's 4 and I'm worried she will get her feelings hurt if I don't let her get the same amount as the other kids.

Any advice on keeping my costs down without bringing my friend's trip down? We are already saving by staying off site in a condo and we are driving my car, we got their tickets off parksavers (DD and I are AP holders). I joined the Landrys club and will purchase a landrys gift card from kroger for the fuel points. I might try and get my hands on some Sam's club discounted disney gift cards to pay for food. It only saves 5% but it's something.

 

[momof2cuties]

We had similar situation when my kids were little and we'd meet my cousin and his family in Disney. They lived in Florida and went often but that didn't stop them from spending like crazy on their little girl. My kids really didn't seem to notice but we are more of a do than a have family.

I do try to get little things at dollar tree for little surprises for little ones. It's especially worth picking up some glow stuff to bring!

As far as the dinners, if it's not a hardship I'd just go with the flow and have fun with your friends.

 

[jo-jo]

Maybe you could point out how much time all those meals will take. Maybe after the first one, you could point out this meal took three hrs (travel time, wait time, eating time) the kids would be much happier with a CS meal, and ice cream and pool time. And then cancel most of the others. Still do one in the middle and one at the end of trip.

 

[Aliceacc]

Why not back out of some of the character meals? Have a frank talk with her-- that the plans as they are are busting your budget. So she can have her character meal, you have counter service, and you can meet up afterwards? The added perk is a little mom-daughter time on the vacation for both families, time spent alone apart from your good friends. Your daughter can spend that time doing the things SHE wants to do, without worrying that the other family may not want to re-ride the teacups or whatever. And too much togetherness, even with people you love, can be tiring.

So she has her dream trip, you have yours, and you still have lots of time as a big group.

 

[Happyinwonerland]

Maybe you could point out how much time all those meals will take. Maybe after the first one, you could point out this meal took three hrs (travel time, wait time, eating time) the kids would be much happier with a CS meal, and ice cream and pool time. And then cancel most of the others. Still do one in the middle and one at the end of trip.

I am kind of hoping after a character meal or two she will realize how time consuming and expensive they are. Part of the problem is that she has been reading disney blogs, which make every experience sound like THE BEST THING EVER!!! So she thinks if we don't do everything that the trip will be less than spectacular. I've tried convincing her that it will be a great vacation even if we ate CS the whole time, but I don't think I've made an impact.

 

[McKelly]

I would say something now, before you go. I went with a friend and our two DD's and I asked her before we went how she felt about the cost of meals, etc. She said whatever we wanted would be fine. So, I booked some restaurants I thought they would enjoy, because I wanted them to enjoy Disney as much as my DD and I did. Well, they complained about the cost each time. It was very uncomfortable. I wish she would have been upfront because I would have booked less meals and planned more counter service. It would have made no difference to us. But sitting at the table was not the right time to have that conversation - not that you would. But talk to your friend - she might not care if you do all those character meals, but would agree to sub some of them out for cheaper restaurants - like Sci-Fi, Prime Time, GF Cafe, Plaza, etc. Sometimes it's easier to NOT do buffets with younger kids.

 

[richmo]

I agree with the PP...I'd resolve this before you get down there. Especially since you're staying offsite, there's great opportunities to save on dining. Number one, I'd suggest you do all breakfasts at the condo, maybe one character meal. There are loads of good restaurants just outside Disney that are much less expensive. (One tip: Moe's Southwest at Crossroads Plaza (at end of Hotel Plaza blvd) has $6 entire meals on Mondays. Another: Sweet Tomatoes, also at Crossroads Plaza and on 192, has a nice buffet for about $10-12 that kids enjoy - includes pizza, ice cream, etc. (also sign up with them for coupons)). I love the Disney restaurants, but there's plenty of fun places to go nearby.

 

[Happyinwonerland]

I'm not going to fuss about it while we are there, I'm hoping she will come to the realization of her own l. If she doesn't I guess it's not a huge deal but spending that much on some sub par meals hurts!

 

[MKCP5]

I'm On board with opting out of a few in favor of a little one on one for you and your DD. It's nice to have a little of the character meal experience but nice to have a little alone time w your baby girl too. That could save you $400 if you just do half of them!

 

[Mom2Stitch]

I understand doing character meals, it makes meeting the characters a little easier. But 8 of them? One to get Mickey and the gang, one to get the pooh characters, and one for princesses. After those I believe I'd have to sit out and let her do them if she is still interested.

 

[danielw888]

Just tell her the truth. Tell her you have a budget, but dont want to infringe on her and her kids fun. Be honest, and if she is really the great person you say, she will understand.

Then tell her to go enjoy as many character meals as she wants, and you will join her for a few of them. Tell her to use that time as some alone time with her kids. Over 11 days at some point you will both need a break from each other, and each others kids. Use this as part of that time.

How old are her kids? Are they all around 4? That is a ton of money to spend on meals that they might still be to young to even remember. Truthfully for our kids they would enjoy 3 hours of extra pool time over having a sit down meal with some characters that they only get to interact with for a few minute of. Just explain to her the facts, and see where she stands after that. If she insists her kids need to go to them all, just explain that its fine with you, but you want to scale back some.

There is no reason you both have to do EVERYTHING together. There is a high likelihood you will both enjoy your vacation more if you spend some time apart over the 11 days.

 

[pigletto]

I think the time for this conversation was way back when the plans were being made, the character meals were being booked and the trip was being planned. I don't mean that unkindly. I just don't think the meal plans can be altered too much 3 days before leaving without hurt feelings and frustration. At this point I think you go with the plan you made and stick to your spending guidelines on souvenirs.

 

[TwoMisfits]

I join the camp that says chat before you go, agree to do 2 together, and then back out of the rest. You can say you'd like your own mom-daughter meal time, you'd like to have money to have fun for the rest of the summer after the trip, you just don't have to funds, etc. Pick the 2 best ones or the most crucial to the group's plans and go to those and skip the rest. She doesn't even have to change the res, b/c there won't be a no-show fee as long as some of the group shows up.

Just like a big group family vacation, friends are also allowed to split up for some of the time and enjoy some alone time with their nuclear family - makes for a MUCH better trip...

 

[Minnesota!]

I say talk about it now. Enjoy your trip!

 

[barkley]

with the friend-

I would be forthcoming and tell her that you've been to the world, done character meals-and based on your experiences you want to limit it for you and your dd to "x number" or whatever specific ones you want to do (if any at all). (honestly, with my kids at that age it was too overwhelming to do more than 2 or 3 on that length of trip, and with the heat their appetites tended to wither away so we often enjoyed grabbing a pizza to take back to the condo to have some down time).

w/your dd-

the walmart near the park has plenty of Disney stuff if you want to get her a few little things. that's were we ended up getting Disney themed autograph books, dolls (I remember dd getting a Barbie sized little mermaid doll for 1/4 the price the park was selling it for), and ds once we got there realized he much preferred getting some non Disney inexpensive items that went with others he had at home.

if you have time before you leave to hit a local walmart you could grab a few things to squirrel away in your suitcase as treats for her-Disney themed beach towel and adult men's Disney t-shirt as a cover-up, sunglasses, some glow sticks, coloring book/crayons, maybe a small plush. you could spread out smaller/less expensive treats that she'll actually get some use of during/after the trip.

 

[Marionnette]

Wednesday we are leaving for an 11 day trip down. It will be me, DD, a close friend, and her 2 DDs. I think it will be a great trip, except our financial strategies are very different.

When I travel, I tend to try and stick with smart financial decisions. We may do 1 or 2 character meals, mixed with quick service and meals at our condo. We are not big eaters and try to stick with at least a semi healthy diet while on vacation. Eating too much junk really makes me feel awful. I tend to not buy many souvenirs, which I think are overpriced and won't be remembered. I do my best not to shop on vacation (unless I'm in a place with awesome outlets, like Gatlinburg). I earn a lot of money but I have a lot to pay for and I can't just spend freely.

My friend is one of the best people I know. She is a wonderful person and her daughters are the most well behaved children I have ever met. She is very much a free spender. She doesn't make much and to overcompensate she pretty much buys whatever she feel like until her money is gone and then is broke until payday. This is her first trip to disney and so far we have 8 character meals planned. I added it up with tip and that's roughly $800 I'll be spending just for DD and I on 8 meals. I'm trying to go with the flow because I don't want to bring down her first big vacatiom, but I really don't want to spend that much on food. I usually budget $1000 for 3 of us for our whole trip. I'll be spending almost that much on just 8 of the meals! Additionally, I know she is going to buy her girls a bunch of souvenirs. She just can't tell them no. I've been trying to prepare DD, explaining to her that we don't need a bunch of disney stuff because we go so often, and we might not get as many toys as the others do. But she's 4 and I'm worried she will get her feelings hurt if I don't let her get the same amount as the other kids.

Any advice on keeping my costs down without bringing my friend's trip down? We are already saving by staying off site in a condo and we are driving my car, we got their tickets off parksavers (DD and I are AP holders). I joined the Landrys club and will purchase a landrys gift card from kroger for the fuel points. I might try and get my hands on some Sam's club discounted disney gift cards to pay for food. It only saves 5% but it's something.

Gee, that's a lot of character meals and a lot of money & time spent on them!

But the time to speak up about those plans was when they were first mentioned. At this point, you're only a few days away from going. Your friend (or you) made ADRs for 5 people and getting those same ADRs for 3 people may not be possible. If you and your daughter decide not to go, you could be be charged $20 for each meal because of a no-show, unless your friend cancels the ADR completely. (Although in some cases, the restaurant will waive the no-show if the majority of the party shows up.)

I would be inclined to show the friend what her share of the meals will cost. Maybe seeing it on paper will convince her that it's too much money to be spent on just food and character interaction. If she realizes how expensive it will be, then the two of you can choose which ADRs to cancel. But if she still wants to spend that much on dining, you may have to just suck it up and spend just for the sake of keeping the peace.

When it comes to souvenirs, you're the mother. If you tell your daughter "no", then that should be the end of it. If she feels bad, well...that happens. Kids always feel bad when they've been denied something they want. She will get over it by the time the next attraction exits into a gift shop.

 

[monorailsilver]

I would opt out of a few meals and meet up after like someone else suggested. TS/character meals cut into valuable park time.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

I don't think you should burst her bubble saying it's a waste of time and money. It's her first trip with her DD's and she wants the full experience for them. When I took my kids for the first time we did about 7 character meals. We've tapered back but I don't regret it one bit.

Now we do 1-2 a trip. I would have definitely told her at the time of booking which ones we would do. I don't think it's too late to back out. If they show up they won't be charged the no show fee for you two.

 

[SunnieRN]

Since you have been on several trips and this is her first trip, I would talk to her openly and frankly. I would tell her you love the idea of two to three character meals. You would happily go to one with Mickey and friends, one with princesses and possibly Pooh and friends.

I would be clear that you have absolutely no problem with her taking her daughter's to the additional 5 character meals. I would think she should understand and if not, suggest that she also buy a Laundrys card so that you could go to Rain Forest Cafe and/or T-Res.

As for souvenirs, since you have a car, maybe you could go to the Disney outlet one afternoon. The prices were very good when we went. I will say they had a LOT more girl things than boy things, so that should work well for your party. I have also controlled spending by taking pictures of everything my grandmunchkins wanted along the way, telling them we would shop on our last day. From the time they were three, I've gotten them Visa cards and that is the amount they have to spend. When it's 'their' money, they would often think twice, lol.

I hope you all have a magical trip.

 

[msmama]

8 character meals?!? You're going to be seeing the same characters doubled. Maybe you could talk her down so you're not repeating characters, at least. Talk up some of the other good food that's not a character meal that you'd be missing out on. If you're filling up at Buffets then you're not going to have room for snacks like mickey bars and dole whips and mickey pretzels and churros... Maybe you could do one per park or something.

You could phrase it as a "Hey, it just occurred to me that..."

Just keep the cancellation policy in mind.