Trip in January...should I keep it?

[amber098724]

So I have a problem I'm hoping you guys can help me with.

So I had a trip planned with my boyfriend to go to Disney January 11-17th. Well we broke up last night. So one of my really good friends offered to pay his half and go with me instead.

Now my parents were totally fine with me going with my boyfriend, but they aren't to keen on me going with my friend.

So some details we're both 23 with no debt, work full time jobs, and it would be about 700 per person + plane ticket. Everything is booked, dinner reservations have all been made, hotel reservations is done, and a deposit has been put down on the trip. We'd just have to have it paid off by November 27th.

So I don't know what I should do. Should I keep the trip and have the memories or cancel and have the money?

 

[Suellen]

I would still go.... but I am irresponsible when it comes to Disney so I may not have the best advice! LOL!

 

[helenk]

I say go and enjoy yourself. My sister and I went in January last year and it's a great time of year to go. We went before President's Day weekend, it was chilly but the parks were not crowded at all it was wonderful.
My daugter is 23 and went to Ireland by herself for a college course, I would have no problem with her going to WDW with a friend.

 

[Pig Pen]

When I was 23 I had been married for 5 years and had 2 kids. Go already!

 

[crazedprincess]

I was engaged at 23 and teaching 7th grade English. I agree, you should go! You are an adult!

 

[amber098724]

They tell me I'm being irresponsible and not planning for the future. But it would have been the same cost if I went with my boyfriend or if I go with my friend. So I'm torn. I've never been on a vacation with anyone but my family and would really like this experience.

I've also been to Disney and it seemed to be a rather doable price for two young adults. Once we get there we wouldn't be buy to much since the majority of what we'd need is included in the vacation package. The only thing we were thinking about getting was the photopass cd preordered since she wants to talk alot of pictures.

And my friend has never been to Disney before, and I don't want to disappoint her. But my parents seem to have this idea that she's not going to go at the last minute. I guess I still have time to decide but I just don't know what to do.

 

[jazz0007]

You've got the rest of your life to be responsible. It's $700...in the whole scheme of life...not worth the stress of cancelling! I can "hear" it in your voice you still really want to go....go! Show your friend the magic of Disney and enjoy yourself!!!

 

[hildyp]

I say go and have fun!!!

 

[TinkerbellinLouisian]

Well - you sound like a VERY mature young lady... especially at your age...

While I agree with PP's and just want to tell you to GO GO GO!....

I am also a Parent...so have to look from the parents perspective.

It seem's their fear is that they feel your friend is making a commitment ($700?) that she will not live up to....

And they are concerned that you will be left 'Holding the bag'. They may "see" more from their experience with life... in this girl that make them think she is not as mature as you and will not hold up her end of the bargain.

Since the reservations are in Your name... I assume that means you would have to pay her $700 if she drops the trip at the last minute....

So what I would suggest is that IF YOU REALLY want to go...but want to please your parents as well... you have a "Back up" plan...Here is your Plan:

1. You and friend go and have a GREAT time....
2. Friend backs out at LAST minute....and your Backup plan is : ___(you fill in the blanks)_____
3. You arrange with Friend to pay hers up front....so that IF she backs out...You can still have a option to go single OR to bring someone (other friend? Your MOM?) and the trip is paid for.... example: make her give you $50 per week for 14 weeks. You have made all these plans...she's getting a REALLY good bargain....a trip planned for FREE !

Part of the reason I say this is because at PRACTICALLY your very same age... I took out a Loan with a "friend" and ended up learning a VERY expensive lesson because Friend skipped out on me and I had to pay back with a LARGE interest fee to preserve my credit score..... I WAS responsible like yourself... however Very naive (and I still am) about people.

That being said...I hope you both go and have a Great time... just make your parents less worried. They are worried because they love you !

Good Luck !

((HUGS))
Mary

 

[JillRenee1213]

Either get the money up front from your friend or cancel. I can't even count on both hands how many times I've fronted the money for tickets/hotel rooms/etc. and have had people back out at the last minute, leaving me with the bill. No matter how much you think you can trust a person... get the money up front ; )

 

[mariepapa]

Mary's idea sounds like a good one. Get the money up front so you aren't left holding the bag at the end. That would stink to be left with a large expense and a lost friendship. But if you can, go! You sound very mature and are old enough to make your own choices. Good luck and have a wonderful trip!

 

[DaniB]

I agree with TinkerbellinL. Get the money upfront from your friend. This way you and your parents have piece of mind that you will not be stuck paying if your friend backs out.

Then go!! You're 23. A young adult. Have a vacation experience and some fun. I wish my husband (then BF) and I went away to Disney or somewhere overseas BEFORE we settled down as mature responsible adults with kids and a house!

 

[Brad Bishop]

Get the cash up front but also remember to tell your friend: You have 4 months to pay me - otherwise I'm cancelling.

They can pay you a little at a time or all at once - whatever works. Also, take the cash, put it in a safe place, and write your friend a receipt for it especially if they're paying you off a little at a time. Just something simple like:

date: 10/10/2010
original balance: $700
current balance: $650
received: $50
new balance: $600

Make a copy for each of you.

Some may think it's over the top but it's such a simple solution to either your friend thinking they paid you when they didn't OR you forgetting that they paid you. People forget. This isn't insulting to either of you. It's the whole point of receipts. If you don't want to do this (and that's fine) then losing the $700 isn't that big of a deal to you (and there's nothing wrong with that, either). I do it with my own daughters and when they get into similar situations with other people I have them do the same. Best case: it avoids the: I'm sure I paid you - argument. Worst case: you realize they're not a friend, were trying to screw you, and take them to court.

Also, if they come up short or decide they want to back out you each have a record of what they paid AND you can just hand the money back over - no harm, no foul.

It shouldn't be THAT big of a deal for someone who wants to go on a trip to Disney to save up $700 in 4 months. If they can't do it, you have up until the week before to cancel.

 

[kaligal]

Save your money.

Trust your parents.

 

[amber098724]

Thanks for all the comments and advice guys. She already said she was going to give me all the money upfront so I wouldn't be stuck paying the whole bill myself. I'm just a worrier, so I think of all the possible things that could happen.

 

[softballmom3]

If she's going to go ahead and pay, then just go and have a great time! I was married w/ 2 kiddos by 23 so I'd say that's old enough. Your parents do sound very caring and just want the best for you so....explain that this is it . I, too, am a sucker for Disney!

 

[LaurenT]

You should definitely go! I think your parents are crazy! My parents would have had the exact opposite sentiment - they would have thought it was fine to go with a friend, but inppropriate to go with a boyfriend (also crazy IMHO).
You are an adult - old enough to drive, to drink, to die for your country - I really don't think a little trip to the happiest place on earth is going to have any effect on your ability to live a successful life (unless it does it's job of giving you some relaxing fun time to blow off steam so you can go back to the real world with a renewed energy).

 

[okeydokey]

I think it's kind of crazy to let your parents decide for you if you should take a vacation. You are 23 and an adult and are paying for this yourself. Do you live with them? Honestly, I would tell them you have decided to go and the topic is not up for discussion.

You and your friend will have a GREAT time.

 

[harpinjean]

You are only going to be young once, I say go for it! Your friend is paying upfront so getting stuck shouldn't be a problem. Going to Disney with friends is awesome!! I had to wait until I was in my 40's and my children were older to experience Disney with some friends. It was an awesome trip! I have enjoyed all my trips with my family, but it was different going with friends and I am so glad I did it. You need to go before you have to many commitments and CAN'T go. Is sounds like you have vacation time - go for it!

 

[TandLMommy28]

When I was 23 I'd been out of college and married for 2 years, bought a house and had a baby... so I can't fathom NOT going to Disney World because my parents said so. However, I do believe in respecting your parents no matter how old you are, so I would sit down and talk to them about what their concerns are with this friend. I think ultimately the decision is yours but talking to your parents respectfully about it so that they know you took their opinion into heavy consideration will make them understand you are a responsible adult. We should never be too old to ask our parents for advice--but that doesn't mean we will always end up following it. (My mom told me that my kids are too young to see Hallowishes and that I'm cruel for subjecting them to something so "Scary"... I am glad she gave me her opinion, and we discussed her concerns, but we are still going).