The Shmoopy DINKs in "Plussing the Weenie" -- now COMPLETE!

[Circusgirl]

Much like our turnstile luck, our lunchline luck always seems to put us in proximity to folks who either don’t know what they want to eat (“Hon? Should I get the burger, or the chicken? The burger? You sure? I was thinking the chicken. What do you want to drink?”), or don’t know how to pay for it with the DDP. Fortunately, Disney CMs are trained in patience – if these folks tried to pull this at the McDonald’s on Sixth Avenue, they’d get screamed at by a fourteen-year-old in a hairnet with fake fingernails the size of canoes.

This is all so riotously true! I'm always wondering what people are thinking about as they stand in line and look at the menu, because it clearly isn't their about to be food!

We stop on our way back to Everest to watch the gibbons for a few minutes – the mom is hugging the baby while the dad looks on, munching on a stalk of something green. Then we use our first Fip on another ride up and down and around the mountain. I always wind up screaming on the big drop, which turns into a laugh as we careen around the turns: “Aaaaaaaahhhh! Hee hee hee hee hee!”

What a perfect description of riding Everest!

Then, on our way back to the train, we run into a talking trash can, who’s mystifying and delighting all the kids in sight.

I love Push!

Then we walk the Cretaceous trail, where Bill makes a new friend:

“Honey, I found this dinosaur, and he followed me home. Can we keep him? I wanna keep him!”

“Now Shmoopie, I don’t think the cats want us to bring home a dinosaur. Shmoo – let go of the dinosaur. Let go…Shmoopie, I know he’s your friend, but other people want to see the dinosaur too, so…Shmoopie, we discussed this ahead of time, remember? I told you, we weren’t going to be able to get everything you want, remember? And you said you understood, and you wouldn’t…aww, don’t be sad, Shmoo. The dinosaur will miss you too, but the dinosaur likes living here in Florida. He wouldn’t like it in New York. No, we can’t move here and stay with the dinosaur. Because we can’t! Now come on, we have to go to the safari before it closes. Come on, Shmoopie. Don’t you want to see the other animals? We’ll come back and see the dinosaur again later. Look, Shmoo, I think I see Mickey! Over that way!”

The sun is going down, and I know that all the parks are beautiful at dusk, but wow. AK is really, really beautiful at dusk:

My most recent trip is the first time I was in AK after dark and it is spectacularly beautiful! Everest feels about 4 times faster in the dark,
which was a really fun surprise.

By 3am, I wake up Bill and start crying to him about everything that’s wrong. And my ever-patient and loving partner calms me down and helps me get back to sleep by 5. But the damage has been done, and now the alarm’s set for 6:30 so we can open DHS tomorrow… will we make it, or have I (as I sobbed to Bill in the middle of the night) “ruined our vacation with my stupid anxiety, the way I ruin everything”? Stay tuned!

I'm sorry you had an attack of the night worries! I have great confidence in you, Bill, and Disney so I know everything was better in the morning.

Oh, and I agree - where are the Wall-E pajamas?

You were aces at maxing your ride and animal time - there is so much to do and ogle at the AK that I have a hard time fitting it all in one day.

More to come soon - yaaay!

 

[bensonmum]

I have been waiting a year to read your next trip repot. Glad I finally found it

 

[girlbomb]

I'm sorry you had an attack of the night worries! I have great confidence in you, Bill, and Disney so I know everything was better in the morning.

Circusgirl, your confidence is well-placed! (In Bill and in Disney, at least; the jury's still out on me.) And thank you for the ...

I have been waiting a year to read your next trip repot. Glad I finally found it

bensonmum, welcome back! I hope your October trip was a blast.

And now here's Day Four: Monday, December 8: Grandma Got Run Over by an Emotional Reindeer, but Managed to Mostly Rebound

So we left off around 5 a.m., when I was finally able to go back to sleep after hours of insomnia, worrying, crying, waking up Bill, crying some more, worrying some more, and finally succumbing to exhaustion. Fun!

One of the things I found hardest to cope with this night was the realization that I could feel this bad while at Disney World. Because for months, when feeling stressed or insomniac, I’d been using thoughts of Disney to lull me back to sleep. For a while, I would list our ADRs in order, in a kind of “counting sheep” strategy, and I would often conk out before I got to the middle of the week. Once that stopped being effective (because I could rattle off the week’s worth of ressies without even pausing), I started mentally planning the hypothetical December 2012 trip with our friends and their baby – “So we’ll get there on Friday, and they’ll show up Sunday afternoon, and we’ll have dinner at Chef Mickey’s so Miranda can meet Mickey and the gang first thing. Then Monday morning we’ll do Crystal Palace…”

In short, Disney has been my go-to source for relaxing thoughts for months. So what do I do when I’m having miserable anxieties while at Disney? What do I have to look forward to, or hope for? It reminds me of a very powerful koan for meditation – “If I do not have peace and happiness today, when will I have peace and happiness?” I interpret this to mean that, if you’re waiting for some outside event to happen because you think that this event is the thing will allow you to feel peace and happiness, you should stop waiting, and invite those feelings into your life right now. But at 4:30 a.m., when I’m feeling scared and overwhelmed and terrible all around, I am terrified to ask myself, “If I do not have peace and happiness while at Disney, when will I have peace and happiness?” Because the answer feels like, “NEVER.”

Well, I’m glad to report that that initial answer is wrong. I don’t exactly feel joy when the alarm rings at 6:30, but I am still very happy to be here in Disney World (so maybe the koan should say, “If I’m going to feel profoundly miserable, I might as well feel profoundly miserable at Disney”). I am also full of gratitude for Bill, who is so incredibly patient, loving, and supportive (and, no doubt, exhausted). And we have a lot to look forward to today, as we are finally on our way to one of our favorite parks: Disney Hollywood Studios!

Stacey helps perk me up as we get ready, and we’re out the door with smiles on our faces to catch a quick ride over to DHS for our 8:05 ressie at Hollywood and Vine. We’ve eaten here for lunch and dinner before, and always enjoyed it well enough; today we’re hoping that an early breakfast before park opening will get us to the rope ahead of the rest of the crowd, so we can be best poised for the Toy Story Midway Mania mania. We’re both a little yawny, and my throat is sore (maybe from crying, maybe from an impending illness), but we’re feeling happy to be standing at the turnstiles at DHS, looking forward to a yummy buffet and a day of fun.

There are a handful of other families waiting for early entry ADRs; I’m smiling at the kids attached to the family in front of us, who are eager and excited and goofing around. We’re second in a line of maybe thirty families, and then we see them, rushing up to the gate past everyone else in line: The Special People.

You’ve seen The Special People, right? You will recognize them by their undeniable specialness, which usually manifests itself in an over-loud voice, a presumptive manner, and a hardness around the mouth as they demand, “Excuse me! We have a reservation for breakfast!”

The dad in front of us shares a roll of the eyes with us, as the friendly CM patiently explains that yeah, toots, and so do all those other people you just blew past in line, so you might want to dial it down a few notches and go stand in the queue with the rest of them. I mean, I understand the concept of wishful thinking, and it really never hurts to ask what you’re standing on line for before blindly joining a queue, but some people’s sense of entitlement really rankles sometimes. One of the glorious things about Disney is the way in which the social contract is enforced; people like this (and they are in abundance) almost always get their (courteous, calm, and firm) comeuppance.

But it’s not long before us Truly Special People are allowed into the park, where I stop to take a picture of Bill on an empty Sunset Boulevard:

Ha ha! It almost looks like he’s wearing the hat. I bet I am the only person who has ever engineered a picture so that it looks like the subject is wearing the sorcerer’s hat!

Then we check in at H&V, and are seated in short order at a two-top near the buffet. A few other families are seated, but none of them are in our section, which seems odd, but we roll with it. More and more families are entering, so I’m sure we won’t be alone in Siberia for long, and one of the Little Einsteins drops by to say hi, and gets called a precocious scamp for his troubles.

I really don’t know the first thing about the Little Einsteins, or Jojo’s Circus, but now I see the lion starting his rounds on the other side of the room, and that is one cute lion. I have a severe hankering to meet that lion, especially after watching him with a recalcitrant toddler – the way he drops to one knee, bows his head, and extends a paw for the kid to pet is so perfect and sensitive and adorable (and successful!), I am once again welling up with tears. Come over here, Lion, I say psychically, beaming the thought in his direction. Please come this way.

I am hesitant to go to the buffet while the lion’s nearby, hoping that he’ll be over any minute, but more and more families are joining the party, and now he’s going the wrong way. I’m still feeling a little fragile from last night’s complete mental meltdown, and now I’m actively pining for this giant stuffed lion to notice us and come over. And at the same time, I’m berating myself for being so dumb and weird and greedy, when the lion is busy bringing serious delight to youngsters all around us (well, not right around us, as we seem to be in a no man’s land, but still close enough that I can witness his antics). There are people with serious problems in the world, and some of them are visible here at Disney, where they do such a wonderful job of accommodating Make A Wish kids; so who cares if I might not get to meet the lion?

Well, I do, deeply. But he’s far in the other corner now, and it’s almost 8:45, so it’s time to finish my plate of food (I’d tell you what was on it, but I’m afraid that watching the lion distracted me from watching what I was eating), and head out to the rope. But I’ll be back for you, lion! You and me, we have a date for December of 2009.

We’re alone at the rope for a minute or two, watching the couple of the day get prepped for the opening ceremony by a CM in a blazer and skirt (“They’re from Ohio,” Bill predicted. “The family of the day is always from Ohio.”). Then the throng from the turnstiles joins us, kids pushing past us to loll right on the rope (one kid even put the rope in his mouth – I hope his mom made him gargle with Purell after that), the anticipation palpable all around us. I hear two women talking about Tour Guide Mike and the DIS behind us, but don’t want to interrupt them to say, “Hey, me too! I’m a fan of all that stuff too.” I suspect there are a lot of us here, even though I don’t see a single Lime Green Mickey Head.

And then, the opening ceremony begins, and the couple of the day (turns out they’re from Ohio, of all places!) say their line, and we all start the very fast walk to TSMM. This walk is a little different than the very fast walk to Everest, or Space Mountain; there’s a desperation to this walk that hasn’t been present with the others. One mom is dragging her son so hard it looks like his shoulder is going to dislocate – “Just pick him up and carry him,” I want to say, “before you stretch the kid’s arm like an octopus.” Bill and I have decided to ride first and then get a Fip, so we blaze through the empty line (and what a dazzling queue area it is! It’s a shame to whip through it as fast as we do), and hop right on a car.

Instantly, I can tell: I love this ride. Love. Love love love love love. So much fun! Leaves poor Buzz in the dust! The theming, the gameplay, the motion of the cars – I LOVE it. Bill enjoys it, but isn’t quite as passionate as I am, even as he nearly doubles my score (I get a bunny for a prize, he gets a kitty). I can see, as we exit, that the standby line is already outrageous, but I can’t wait to get a Fip and ride this thing later.

Except, wow. The line for Fips is loooooong. And as we’re standing there, at 9:15, return times jump up another five minutes every few seconds – when we first get in line, they’re at 10:45; by the time we get the Fip, it’s 11:15. Note to selves: Next year, get the Fip, then ride!

Then we’re off to the Tower of Terror, where we usually spend the first hour of park time riding standby again and again. Now there’s a short wait, but soon we’re ushered into the library for the pre-show, and instead of clustering right at the exit door (as we will for all of our 3000 subsequent rides on ToT), we stand where we can actually see the video. I love the way the lightning flash on the video coincides with the lightning flash in the library window – subtle things like that are what make Disney rides so much more than just rides!

And this one is a doozy. The spooky beauty of the hotel hallway going dim, and the star-lights appearing in 3D, is so effective; I also love the shimmer and zip of the elevator shaft opening before you get to the big bounce. And the sensation of rising and falling is so thrilling, and yet gentle! For someone who dreads things like heights and turbulence, it’s most unexpected that I would love this ride as I do. I especially love it when the ride goes straight into a fall – it really catches you unaware, and that’s half the fun. I also love the view of the park, and that float-y air time you get. I’m never scared on this ride, but I always have to scream anyway; it’s just an instinctive reaction to the surprise of the sudden motion. Bravo to the Imagineers who created the random element to the rise and fall – you never know what to expect here, except that you’ll have fun!

Our first ride complete, we go back for a second, but we can see that the line is growing – now there’s a full fifteen minute wait, which is notably longer than it should be for this time of day, this time of year. We’d hoped that TSMM would draw crowds away from ToT, but that doesn’t seem to be so. Oh well – instead of riding four times in a row, we’ll settle for two really fun trips up and down the hotel elevator, and then we’ll head over to the Rock N Roller Coaster.

Hooray for single rider lines! There’s a 30 minute wait posted for standby, but we walk right past it, and are waiting for limo seats in a few short minutes (of course we have to hiss “MARCUS!” at each other from our separate rows, as it’s been days since we did so last, and the humor hasn’t been fully squeezed out of it yet). Throughout the year, Bill and I will occasionally exhort each other to “look at Steven Tyler’s hat!”, as the radio deejay sometimes does while you’re waiting for the take-off; today, alas, we are not given any explicit instructions about Steven Tyler’s headgear, and whether or not we should pay attention to it.

3-2-1! ZOOM! This is another ride I really shouldn’t love, but do (although it’s way too short!). I would never attempt a ride that takes you upside down and through a corkscrew, except at Disney; here, I’ll do it over and over again until my ears are practically ringing from the sensation. I forget to take my earrings off for this first ride, which is a mistake, as my head bangs against the sides of the headrest and the pointy earring backs keep poking into my flesh. But other than the whole “sharp things poking me in the neck” sensation, the ride is great fun.

So we do it again, single rider again, this time minus the earrings. Still no instructions re: Steven Tyler and his hat. When we meet up again in the gift shop, Bill asks if I remembered to look at Steven Tyler’s hat, and I confess that I didn’t. “Nobody told me I should!”

We’re noticing that crowds are definitely thicker than usual today – it’s just after ten, and RnR is already posting a 40 minute wait. We can also see the thickness of the crowd on Hollywood Boulevard, and it’s a little unsettling. Has our very favorite “slow” time of the year started to catch on with everyone else? Nooooooo!

We decide to head over to Star Tours, where there is never a line, and true to form, we pretty much walk right on. There is a woman in front of us with two small boys, maybe six and eight years old, and the eight year old is having a meltdown. He doesn’t want to ride now; he wants to go back with his mom, who is waiting for them somewhere outside. As we’re waiting to be loaded into the pod, he tries to dart away, but the woman catches him by the shirt and doesn’t let him go. She has a harried look on her face, and I feel badly for her.

As soon as we’re seated, the eight-year-old takes off out the other side of the pod. Is the woman going to go after him? She does not, she just sighs and buckles herself and the six-year-old in for the ride. It makes me nervous that this eight-year-old kid is now running out the exit towards his mom, who may be nearby or may not; I’m just glad we’re in a place where they know how to deal with kids separated from their chaperones, should that be necessary.

And then I’m totally distracted from the disruption, because a member of the dream team has entered our pod, and we’re all getting free “Year of a Million Dreams” Mickey ears! Okay, so it’s not a Dream Fip, or a stay in the castle suite, but we’ve never won anything, and we’re psyched to have won these. Well, I’m psyched – I can tell, Bill’s not going to wear his ears, because he has something he calls “dignity,” which I am happily lacking. I am about to suggest that Bill donate his ears to the woman with the missing eight-year-old, but the Dream Team saw what happened, and gives her some ears for him in absentia. Yay, Dream Team!



After getting bounced around space by a novice pilot, we hit the gift shop, where I got my very awesome Storm Trooper t-shirt last year (it’s shrunk from all the washing, or I’d have it on today). We are coaxed into taking a novelty picture of ourselves as Leia and Hans Solo, and it turns out so great that we buy it, despite the hefty price tag (almost 40 bucks, if I recall correctly). We also pick up a Boba Fett t-shirt for Bill’s brother Kevin, and Bill eyes all the action figures with lust in his heart, but he already has several plastic tubs full of action figures stuck in our storage unit while we wrangle with the real estate issue, so he passes them by.

Meanwhile, I am so happy with my ears! And, as predicted, Bill will not wear his, so I put on his pair along with mine. This makes me the double coolest person in the park, a fact I am assured of by the many envious stares I get over the course of the day (“Those stares are not envious,” Bill begs to differ. “They are fearful, because you look like a lunatic.”)

Lunatic? Or genius? I leave it for you to decide. Remember, people thought Walt Disney was a lunatic sometimes! And those people were very, very wrong.

Wearing both pairs of ears (genius!), I walk with Bill through the admiring crowds towards Tower of Terror to get new Fips; then we head back to Toy Story to use our earlier Fips. These is a mom with her young son in front of us – he sees my two hats and immediately puts on both sets of 3D glasses and grins at me. I give him the thumbs up, because wearing two of anything is cool! And funny! And people who don’t think so are mistaken! The mom asks if I can take a picture of the two of them, and I am delighted to do so. Then we take off in our cars and break the heck out of a bunch of plates (if only that were allowable in real life), among other things.

Still love the ride! Still get beaten, badly, by Bill. Someone’s years of video game playing are paying off for him…

(More soon -- thanks for reading along!)

 

[Lady Lallie]

Isn't Goliath the cutest little lion ever? I adore him. I was hoping to catch him at a character meet & greet this last trip but I didn't have any luck. And I totally felt that way about Minnie when we ate at Liberty Tree Tavern. I hadn't seen her around at all and as it's close to when we are leaving I have this awful panic that I will not meet her in splendid colonial garb. I think our server picked up on it and directed Minnie over to us. Phew.

Toy Story is a great ride but the stampede to get there is a bit crazy.

I adore you wearing both dream ears! Good for you and good for that little boy with his 3D glasses!

 

[girlbomb]

Lady Lallie, I am just getting caught up on your P/TRs, and notice that you will be in Disney next December, around the same time we will! I'm looking forward to your Dec. PTR, so I can figure out how to casually bump into you somewhere.

 

[Lady Lallie]

Lady Lallie, I am just getting caught up on your P/TRs, and notice that you will be in Disney next December, around the same time we will! I'm looking forward to your Dec. PTR, so I can figure out how to casually bump into you somewhere.

Well.....we actually just canceled next December's trip. It pains me to do so because I really want to go at that time of year but we have money obligations to attend too and when I go in December I really want to go all out! We'll be there one year.

 

[girlbomb]

Well.....we actually just canceled next December's trip. It pains me to do so because I really want to go at that time of year but we have money obligations to attend too and when I go in December I really want to go all out! We'll be there one year.

Ah! Drat. But I hope your other planned trips will be excellent ones!

On my way to my office -- hoping to post another update today. Thanks again, commenters and lurkers, for dropping by!

 

[girlbomb]

And here it is: Day Four, Part Two: Grandma Got Run Over by an Emotional Reindeer

After I get my butt kicked again at Toy Story Midway Mania, Bill and I decide to check out the Backlot tour, which we didn’t do last year. We’re walking up to the line, when a CM asks us if we’d like to be in the show. I’m ready to say YES!, but Bill doesn’t want to get doused with buckets of water for some strange reason, so we decline. There goes my chance at movie stardom! After waiting in the holding pen for a few minutes, the line starts moving, but the CM drops the rope right in front of us, and we’ll have to wait through another show before we can even start getting through the ride. So we decide to bail out – the Backlot tour’s not that important to us; we just heard a rumor that they might be getting rid of it and thought we’d take it one last time, in case it’s not here next year.

Instead, it’s off to the Muppets, an attraction I remember seeing for the first time in the early ‘90s, on a trip with my mom and kid brother (he was eight or nine then; at 26, he’s not such a kid anymore!). The pre-show for this movie is every bit as awesome as the movie itself – I love looking at all the sets and watching the video, which cracks me up every time. The rat posing as Mickey Mouse? The hairy bald guy the union sent to fill in for one of the dancers? “What kind of foolishness would you like to see?” Priceless, all of it.

And the movie itself could not be more adorable. Fun fact: When Bill was filling out the online personal ad that would eventually lead to our meeting and marrying each other, he was asked to choose a celebrity that he resembled, and he answered “Stadler and/or Waldorf.” Truly, we were meant to be together.

We float out of the movie, giddy and happy and relaxed and having fun, and make a pit stop at the Writer’s Stop for a carrot cake cookie that Bill has heard tell of on the WDW Today podcast (I think it was a recommendation by Len Testa). Ultra-win for us! This treat is fantastic, and it fuels us for another trip over to the ToT for another Fip.

Again, standby wait times are longer than we’re used to for this time of year, and the park is crowded, so we decide to see some of the less popular attractions during the height of the day, all the while collecting Fips for our favorite rides. So we head over towards Sounds Dangerous, a show we’ve never seen, because it’s been so reviled in the guide books and here on the DIS. And what do you know? Sounds Dangerous is CLOSED! Is this just for today, or are they phasing out this “attraction”? I don’t know, but it will be closed all week, so there’s probably something going on with it…

(Meanwhile, next door, the American Idol theater looks ready to accept guests, but remains closed until January, darn it. I’m a big Idol fan, even as it’s gotten shabbier over the last few seasons, but even I don’t know if I’d be interested in spending Disney time watching amateur singers compete. Of course, I’m willing to give it a shot… I’m looking forward to hearing the reviews when it opens, and to reading people’s reactions here!)

The wait for the Great Movie Ride is only 10 minutes, so we jump on the short line, and are soon waiting in the pre-show room, where we see the reel three times in succession before getting into a ride vehicle. And I know this makes me a jaded ingrate, but I think this ride is sadly lacking in something – I remember it being much more lively, when I first came to the park in the early ‘90s. We felt this way last year, but got sucked in by the short line this year; I think next year, we’re skipping the Mediocre Movie Ride.

We head back to ToT to use a Fip, but the standby line is so short (funny, it was longer twenty minutes ago, when we were last here), we jump on standby, and get tossed around by the rogue elevator a few times. Then it’s over to the Animation Studio, where we skip the movie and go straight to the drawing class, something I never would have known about if it weren’t for these most excellent boards. The class was easy to follow, and very satisfying and absorbing – a really pleasurable way to spend fifteen minutes or so.

Here’s a picture of Bill drawing Goofy. Takes one to draw one! Har.

And then we come to the non-Disney portion of our afternoon: I have to call my lawyer. Bill takes my park pass and goes to get us yet more ToT Fips (now we’ll have three in our pockets – we are rich with Fips!), while I reluctantly pull out my phone and engage in a frustrating conversation about real estate. Bill is back long before I’m done – the call takes almost a half hour, including the few minutes I have to spend listening to the lawyer rib me about being at Disney World. I give him the same line I’ve been giving everyone – “Actually, I’m down here to sign books at a convention, so it’s mostly a business trip.” Right! Out of nine days we’ll spend here this trip, I will spend less than two hours selling books. And yet it gives me the moral authority to shut people up when they question me about my Disney habit: Hey, I’m doing it for work!

FINALLY, I am able to get off the phone, though not with the results I’d hoped for, and I’ll have to make another call before Fantasmic! at 7:30. But for now, I try to shake off my irritation at how badly this deal is going, and get back into a Disney frame of mind.

What better way to do so, than to browse One Man’s Dream? I could practically recite Walt Disney’s biography to you, but I still love looking at the artifacts and displays, and taking the time to appreciate them all over again. I’m so grateful this attraction exists, and I hope they never get rid of it; it’s a testament to creative genius that inspires me every time. Walt’s path to success was not a steady one; he faced a number of setbacks along the way, and it’s so helpful to remember that, as I often face professional disappointment. But he kept dreaming, which is what I have to challenge myself to do – not to get complacent, or cynical, or caught up in frustration over what didn’t happen, but to keep my imagination alive, and keep playing. Thank you, Walt, for setting such a brilliant example for other artists – and for giving us this very magical place!

We take our time through the exhibit hall, which means we don’t have time for the movie before our 3:35 ADRs at Mama Melrose (Fantasmic! dinner package, doncha know). But we plan to come back and see the movie later in the trip – now it’s time for pasta!

Despite my frustrating phone call, our sleep-deprived night last night, and a sore throat that’s turning into a bit of a cough, I am still feeling blissful and content as we are seated at Mama Melrose. The place is a faithful reproduction of many of the restaurants in Little Italy here in New York; not sure what that has to do with the theme of the park, but okay. The atmosphere is calm, the people watching is good, and I’m with my Shmoo, who also seems to be having a great time. Our server is prompt and helpful, and the food is quite good – I have a Caesar salad and the seafood pasta fra diavlo; Bill enjoys his breads/spreads appetizer and his penne ala vodka. For dessert, I decide to order a whole slice of cheesecake for myself, rather than just stick a spoon into Bill’s spumoni for a bite. Hey, I need it, after that phone call with my lawyer!

Full to bursting after a yummy lunch, we cruise by Toy Story, but at 4:15, they’re sold out of Fips for the day. Good thing we got our two rides in, but I still have a hankering for more! Well, we’ll be back later this week. But right now, we head back to the ToT to use some of our Fips. And who do we see standing right outside? TJ, the most famous ToT Cast Member of all! If you’ve watched any of the Travel Channel shows about Disney, you’ve seen TJ – we simply MUST get a picture with him. Bill introduces himself and tells TJ how much we admire his work, while I snap this shot:

Then, starstruck, we head towards the ride entrance. But again, we’ve hit a weird dip in the day when the standby line is nil. This always seems to happen around 4 to 5 p.m. – we find that there’s no standby line at all for ToT, and we walk on three or four times in a row. But the park is comparatively mobbed today, so where is everybody? Bill and I shrug at each other, but as long as the crowds are not here, we don’t much care where they are. We get in three standby rides with no wait at all, each one as good as the last (despite some annoying pre-teen cheerleaders in one of the rides, whose pushy manners, snotty little attitudes, and piercing shrieks are enough to make you want to go spontaneously deaf).

As the standby line begins to build again, we go over to RNR for another single rider line. This time, though, things are moving very slowly – here’s where all those crowds were! Bill gets placed in a limo before me; I have to wait a few limos for a chance to ride, but I have a fun conversation with the teenager behind me, who’s curious about my iPhone (yeah, since I have it on me, I can’t resist checking the Twisney site to see what other people are reporting around the parks). I hand over the phone to the kid for his perusal, and almost don’t get it back! But soon enough, I am loaded into a limo, with my iPhone, and though there are still no explicit instructions as to what I should or should not look for on Steven Tyler’s head, I manage to have a great ride (no earrings).

Reunited with Bill once again in the gift shop, we decide to use out ToT Fips, as it’s getting towards the time for Fantasmic!, and we’ve been hoarding them all day. So we breeze past a 30 minute standby line (ha ha, you should have been here a half hour ago, like we were!), and take two more awesome Fip rides on the Elevator of Fright, for a grand total of eight so far today.

Now it’s 7pm, and while we have reserved seats, we better head into the theater right away. We get good seats in the reserved section, and then I head towards the back of the stadium to make yet another real estate related call. I spend fifteen minutes trying to stay calm and reasonable, despite provocation (come on people, we want your apartment and you want our money! What’s so hard about this?), and then it’s time for the show.

I must admit to being a little distracted for the show, and gloomy about the distraction. I love this show, but am not fully able to enjoy it, as my mind is definitely elsewhere. (and of course that reminds me right now as I’m typing this to check my email – yep, something else I need to do re: this real estate deal – once again, pulled away from Disney for this ongoing hassle, argh!)

Okay, back to the fun. Which, unfortunately, is a little less fun than usual, though the show remains outstanding. Bill and I quibble with a few of the plot points – for instance, why does the Pocahontas fight scene come before Mickey’s bad dream? – but you can’t argue with the staging, the amazing screens of mist, and once again the jaw-dropping “let’s set some water on fire” technique. And the boats full of characters at the end are a delight! It feels triumphant all around to see fears vanquished by positive thinking; I’ll try to use Mickey as an inspiration when I’m having middle-of-the-night visitations by my own villains.

We leave the ampitheater quickly after the show (but not as quickly as the folks who start rushing out before the show’s over -- suit yourselves, but why leave before the finale?), and make good time getting back to the entrance, so we hop on ToT one last time with no wait. Then we’re hoping for another crack at Toy Story, but there’s a 60 minute wait, and while I suspect they’ve inflated the wait time to deter people from joining the line this close to park closing, as soon as we enter the show building, I realize, nope, it’s a 60 minute line.

So it’s over to the Osbourne lights, which are more crowded than we’ve ever seen them! But still spectacular. And they’re playing my song, “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!” I am buoyed by this happy coincidence, and we spend a while being dazzled by the lights and snow. We spring for a pair of $1 enhancing glasses, which give you a visual effect strikingly similar to the one you get from taking hallucinogenic drugs (not that I recommend that experience at all! Definitely stick to the dollar glasses instead.)

Here’s Bill, with the Star of David behind him, because upon marrying me he became an honorary Jew:

After peering through the glasses for a while, we decide to pass them off to another guest, so we select a gentleman with a young lady of about four in his arms, and ask him if he’d like a pair of crazy drug glasses (okay, we don’t put it like that). He and his young lady charge happily accept, and Bill and I go off to our 8:15 reservation at Sci Fi.

Funny thing – the park closes at 8 tonight, but when I called Disney Dining lo those many months ago and asked for the latest possible ADR for today, I got 8:15. I confirmed with the CM that the park closed at 8, and she agreed that it was odd that we could get an 8:15 seating, but we happily booked it anyway. We just want desserts and a chance to soak up the atmosphere – we love this place, even though the food is…not great.

So we’re sitting on the bench in the foyer waiting for our table, and all of a sudden Bill sits straight up with a strange look on his face, like he just remembered he left the iron on. “What,” I demand. “What’s up?”

“Shhhh,” he says, impatiently, with the most alert, concerned look on his face. He looks like a prairie dog scanning for predators, intense concentration in his eyes. Then he hears something, and he sits up even straighter.

“The at-at,” he says. “It’s firing. I gotta…I’ll be right back.”

And before I can ask, “What the at-at are you talking about?”, he’s taken off like a shot. He returns two minutes later with a huge smile of satisfaction on his face.

“The at-at was firing! So cool! I didn’t know it did that! I guess it only does that at night. I’d know that sound anywhere!”

Yes, folks, the giant Star Wars “at-at,” that thing that looks like a robotic termite on long legs that presides over the Star Tours pavilion, was making noise and flashing its lights and generally acting as though it were engaged in battle. And Bill got to witness it! He is flushed with happiness, and I am happy for him. A six-year-old’s wish is magically granted, 27 years later, when Bill Scurry gets to see a real live at-at fire!

Unfortunately, while he’s gloating over the at-at, I’m fuming over an email I just received – more real estate mishegos (that means bullstuff, for those of you who don’t speak Yiddish). And again, I am plunged into a sort of double despair – not only am I being annoyed, I am being doubly annoyed, because it’s reducing my pleasure at being at Disney. Here we are at the Sci Fi café, where I have dreamed of being for an entire year, and I can’t enjoy it, because I’m so busy concentrating on how I can’t enjoy it.

Bill orders a milkshake and tries to say comforting things. I, meanwhile, order a giant, honking alcoholic drink – something blue and fruity with a flashing glow cube in it – and try to listen to said comforting things. You’ll note that this is the first and only alcoholic drink I’ll order on this trip, as I am a lame drinker who can’t hold my sauce. But right now, I need something to calm me down, and blue booze is what’s handy. I slurp half of it down in one swallow, training my eyes on the screen ahead of me, trying my hardest to get over myself and soak up the fun. But it’s useless – I’m upset, and I can’t ignore it.

We decide to bail out and go to Downtown Disney. Now that I have a not-very-stiff drink in me, I’m a little more relaxed, but still eager for distraction, so we jump in a cab (too impatient to wait for a bus tonight), and soon find ourselves at DisneyQuest, where we use one of our “Water Parks Fun and More” options for admission, and head straight to the Cyber Coaster. We cook up the most hardcore coaster we can, with multiple loops and jumps and corkscrews, then load into the claustrophobia-inducing capsule. Our coaster is extreme, and extremely fun! I’m already feeling better.

We head back down to the first floor, and wait five minutes for the Pirates of the Caribbean game, which has a cannon much like the Toy Story cannons. Also fun! Then we’re playing some video game that involves a lot of shooting aliens. I am intently killing the heck out of a bunch of aliens, until an attendant comes over and tells us DQ is closing. Awwww! I’d almost forgotten about our real estate troubles for a minute!

We wander past all the shops, noting how dead it is here at Downtown Disney tonight, now that Pleasure Island is no more. We pass sadly by the closed Adventurer’s Club, and walk into the new T-Rex Café, which is awesome:

I don’t know what the food or service is like, but the theming is outstanding.


Then it’s over to World of Disney, where I plan to engage in some hardcore retail therapy. There’s the Ariel sweatshirt I’ve been eyeing for myself – so what if it only comes in kid’s sizes? I can cram into a kid’s XL – oh, and this Belle nightgown is perfect for Naomi’s daughter Grace…

I’m just getting warmed up when Bill confesses that he’s dead tired, and can barely stand up anymore. Poor man – I don’t doubt it, after what I put him through last night! So I put my items back on their racks, and we head right for a cab back to the resort.

So all in all, we managed to have a lot of fun today, despite the lack of sleep and many provocations we encountered during the course of the afternoon and evening. I have much less trouble falling asleep tonight, and Bill has none at all – he’s snoring as soon as his head hits the pillow. I can only hope that tomorrow will bring better news from home, and that we’ll get to fully enjoy our time here in the Happiest Place on Earth…we’ll see!

 

[PinkPrincessZ]

Awesome update, girbomb! Buying a home is so stressful and I hope everything works out for you both.

You are a terrific writer - I really feel like I'm there! Keep it coming!

 

[Lady Lallie]

Another wonderful update. I love the ToT of CM. I always see him on the Disney Travel specials and he just seems so awesome.

I didn't realize you could buy glasses for the lights. I am all over that.

I also checked out the Twisney site! That is way cool!

 

[AmericanCaesar]

I think that my dignity was overrated, in retrospect.

 

[girlbomb]

Awesome update, girbomb! Buying a home is so stressful and I hope everything works out for you both.

You are a terrific writer - I really feel like I'm there! Keep it coming!

Thank you so much, PinkPrincessZ! I'm honored!

Another wonderful update. I love the ToT of CM. I always see him on the Disney Travel specials and he just seems so awesome.

I didn't realize you could buy glasses for the lights. I am all over that.

I also checked out the Twisney site! That is way cool!

Lady Lallie, we'd never seen the glasses before this year either! They may be new. And we were just watching Travel Channel tonight, and saw TJ, and cheered! I think Twisney is cool, but I wish it had more users -- I think they had a problem with people spamming the site, and had to restrict access somewhat. But it could be a really helpful tool, and it's another way to feel like you're there when you're not (sigh...)

I think that my dignity was overrated, in retrospect.

You'll note that I put "dignity" in quotes.

And now, since I'm having the first insomnia attack of 2009, here's Day Five: Tuesday, December 9: Girlbomb the Red-Eyed Reindeer

The alarm rings at the unholy hour of 6am this morning. But as tired as we are (and as sore as my throat may be, which is fairly sore), we’re excited to open Epcot for early Extra Magic Hours, and Stacey helps to amp up our spirits as we dress and get ready. We make a quick stop for a cold breakfast at the Grab N’ Go, then it’s off to the monorail for a trip to the Experimental Prototype City of Tomorrow.

Actually, let me backtrack for a moment. I realize that I’m giving short shrift to the experience of waking up at the Contemporary, throwing open the blinds, and seeing the Magic Kingdom glowing at us through the dawn. I know a lot of people don’t want to spend the money on a view from their hotel room, as they won’t be spending much time there; I totally understand this decision. We don’t spend much time in the room, either. But if it’s in the budget, I wholly recommend a room with any kind of park view – it’s so invigorating and thrilling to be reminded again and again of the incredible make-believe world you get to inhabit for a few wonderful days. And, for us, stepping out into the hallway of the Contemporary in the morning, and seeing and hearing all the activity on the concourse below, adds so much to the immersive delight.

I realized, while watching a slide show of our trip the other night, that the Contemporary is the closest thing Disney offers to the experience of living in New York (well, that, and the overcrowded walkways of certain park areas at certain times of day/year); how funny is it that, when Bill and I choose to vacation at Disney World, land of fantasy, we pick the spot that reminds us most of home? Rather than vacation in a replica of the South Seas islands, or in a recreation of a seaside resort, we choose a simulacra of a city, which you’d think we’d want to get away from for a few days. I guess we’re just city folk at heart! The Contemporary is like our apartment building, the walkway to the MK is like our sidewalk, the monorail is like our subway, and it seems we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Anyway, we’re at the turnstiles at Epcot by 7:30, eagerly waiting with the rest of the earlybirds, and soon we’re allowed through the turnstiles, where we head right to the rope on the furthest right, by Innoventions, for the Very Fast Walk to Soarin’.

We have a few minutes to hang out at the rope and acclimate to the people around us, a group that includes a very aggressive mom wearing a First Visit button, her two boys, and her husband, who is dragging his butt a little too slowly for her liking, as she keeps whipping around to gesture to him – hurry up! Get over here! She’s speaking very loudly to her boys in a thick Southern accent, instructing them as to exactly what they’re about to do (walk very fast over to Soarin’), and how vital it is that there be no shilly-shallying, as their father is apparently doing right now by not standing right at the rope and hyperventilating, as she is. There is no question that Bill and I are zesty and eager park openers, and we like to get to the big rides right away, but this lady is just busting with anxiety about being FIRST, and I’m not sure how much fun that is for her family, who seem more beleaguered than thrilled.

So the rope drops, and we all march in line with the CMs over to The Land, where the crew from Sunshine Seasons is waving at us with big Mickey hands, and dealing out high fives as we pass. You know, everybody could use a few more high fives in their lives; it really does seem to make a difference in people’s moods to be greeted with friendliness and enthusiasm. Not that our new friend, Aggro Mom, needs any more enthusiasm, as she is frothing as she drags her younger son down the queue to the CMs at the gate, turning and waving impatiently at the father and son who haven’t quite kept up.

We hope that she will take a seat in A1, as the CMs direct her to do, but just as we’re asking if we can ride in B1, she’s doing the same – for someone wearing a First Visit button, she’s obviously done her advance work, and knows exactly the experience she wants here. So she and her family are right there next to us for the first ride of the morning, which is a little distracting as the ride begins, and she starts narrating at top volume.

“OH MAH STARS!” she bellows, as soon as we take off. “OH, ISN’T THIS THE BEY-UST? IT’S JUST LAHK FLAH-YIN!” Bill and I squeeze each other’s hands – are you mentally writing this down for the trip report?, his squeeze asks me, and mine replies, oh, you know it. We get to the hang glideing scene, and she shouts, “THAT’S WHAT WE’RE DOIN’ NOW! WE’RE SOARIN’!” Ohhhhh! Hey, thanks for pointing that out, lady; I always wondered why they named this ride “Soarin’”! I thought it was because it made you sore! Squeeze, squeeze.

But you know, you can be bellowing football scores in one of my ears while sounding an air horn at the other, you can rub my knees with sandpaper and poke me in the ribs, but you can’t ruin Soarin’. It’s just too good a ride. And we’re too good at either blocking people out, or using them for our amusement (and our trip reports). So we have a glorious trip over California, wind in our face and orange scent in our nostrils and fireworks in our ears, and we’re ready to dash out of the theater and back around to the standby line, stopping briefly for Fips, to ride again, this time without the narration.

And here we have a totally different experience with the other guests around us. We’re waiting in line down the corridor before you get to the gate, and we’re talking about all the stuff we’re going to do today, including another swing by Club Cool for more soda. We’re miming drinking cup after cup of soda, when we notice the young girl behind us, maybe six years old and adorable, miming the same thing. I catch her eye and smile at her, which she reciprocates, and her parents smile at us. I take this as a go-ahead to speak to the girl, and ask if she’s going to drink some soda at Club Cool later, like us. She nods happily. Her mom tells us that the girl’s brother is deaf, and that she signs all the time; without knowing it, we were using sign language. The girl shows off a few more signs, and I heartily praise her skill at signing.

Then I notice that Mom is writing in a notebook. “Trip reporting?” I ask, and she nods and laughs. “Got to get everything down before I forget it,” she says, and we talk a little bit about how much fun it is to write trippies (and read them!), how it makes the experience richer both in the moment and afterwards, but how much work it takes. I’m just about to ask if she’s a DISboarder, and what her handle is, but the line starts to move, and we wave goodbye as we’re shuttled into separate loading bays. And whatever squeeze I give Bill’s hand this time, as we’re buoyed above the clouds for another fantastic flight, is one of pure pleasure in sharing a nice moment with a lovely family with whom we have something in common.

After our second ride on Soarin’, we head over to Test Track for a single rider spin (standby is posted at 20 minutes, but it looks more like 40 to us). Along with high fives, I think the sensation of wind in your face is something that’s sorely lacking in most people’s everyday lives – it’s something I know I could use more of. Then it’s back to Soarin’ for another Fip, as our first one has already matured. We’re not ready to use it, though; we’re stockpiling them for later. But we do jump on a short line for Living with the Land, a ride we’ve never seen a line for before, even a short line. Which confirms to us yet again that it’s unusually crowded for this time of year. (And I know, it’s our own fault for going to the park with Extra Magic Hours, but this is the only time we’re doing so this trip, and this is part of our traditional routine. We’ve been to EMH at Epcot on exactly this day of the week/year before, and this is notably more crowded.)

But the line for the Land is very short, and we’re quickly escorted onto a boat and through the panoramic vistas, where we notice some hoofprints in the sand in one of the hydroponic growing rooms – a subtle Disney touch, or was there somehow an unauthorized deer invasion in the Land?

After the Land, we decide to check out the Circle of Life film, which we’ve never seen. By this time, the lack of sleep is catching up with us both, and my notes indicate that I am “yawning hard enough to sprain my face.” I do stay awake for the show, though, which is lovely, though it’s hard not to feel a little cynical about the environmental message when you’re sitting in an over-air-conditioned theater, in the middle of a giant theme park/resort. I know Disney does a better than average job of being ecologically responsible, but come on. It’s not exactly a zero carbon footprint.

Okay, enough reality. Back to the fun stuff! We use our first Soarin’ Fip, and our thrill in this ride is not diminished in the least by repetition. By now, it’s about 10:45, and I’m getting hungry, so we start walking towards World Showcase for a pre-lunch snack. I don’t want to overdo it, as we have a 1pm ADR for Teppan Edo, where I totally plan to overdo it; I just want a little snackie. Unfortunately, when we hit England, we hear that most of the countries’ counter service locations won’t be open until 11:30.

But we press on, hoping for something yummy to materialize soon, and – Vive la France! – the patisserie is open. I snag a veggie quiche, and Bill gets a Napoleon. As our pal Stacey would say, “Yummy, yummy, yummy…”

So the spot has been hit, and we head back to England to catch the World Showcase Players. I’m hoping to see some Adventurer’s Club alumni in this production of the King Arthur story, but no luck. We do get to see the comedic stylings of an older gentleman cast as Lancelot, though – as he is from the generation that thinks gay people are inherently laughable, he queens it up quite a bit and makes some fairly obvious sexual references, and has to be gently reminded by the WSPs that this is a family show. Which is why they should have cast Bill instead! Bill is an awesome addition to the WSP cast, as he proved in 2006’s boffo performance as Scrooge in the Christmas Carol skit. Oh well, maybe next year…

Back to Soarin,’ to get another Fip and use our second – this time we’re in the bottom row, but it doesn’t matter. Any seat in this theater is better than none at all! Then the long hike to Japan, where we check in a little early for our ADR at Teppan Edo, and are seated right away.

It’s our first time at Teppan Edo, and we watch some of the other chefs at nearby tables while we order drinks and wait for appetizers. A very skillful but silent guy is throwing lemon halves behind his back and catching them on the point of his knife before squeezing them over the food; at one point, he flips a shrimp tail into his chef’s toque. Another table in the next room is laughing it up; their chef is obviously a little less silent than the guy we’re watching. Our chef, a very pretty and slim young woman named Eri, comes out, and she’s the whole deal – funny, skilled, very charming and likeable. She makes a steaming Mount Fuji out of a pile of onions, then adds a zucchini strip to each side, and asks us to name the Disney character she’s creating. “I give you a hint,” she says, and then does the most adorable “duh huh, duh huh” laugh. It’s Goofy! She says we’re right, and that Goofy’s her favorite character. Right now, my favorite character is Eri – I could watch her all day long.

The food takes a while to prepare and eat, but it’s delicious, and worth it; we’re entertained the whole time. I ask if I can take a picture of Eri, and she graciously poses:

A great meal, in a really fun environment. That’s what we come to Disney for!

(More soon -- wishing you all a wonderful new year, and thanks for reading!)

 

[Lady Lallie]

Your description of Aggro Mom has me laughing hysterically. I can't tell you how many of these kinds we encountered on our last trip. We sat next to a Mom like that during our first Soarin' ride. Quite the experience. I have to go relive that with Marc when I sign off the DIS.

I'm hesitant about trying Teppan Edo but I have read so many great reviews that I just might have to book it. It looks so yummy and fun!

 

[AmericanCaesar]

If you can believe it, the accent was even thicker than portrayed in the text.

 

[Circusgirl]

Your day at HS and then DQ/DTD was jam packed full of goodness of all kinds!
I love it when people love "One Man's Dream." The exhibit does a great job of connecting people to the creation of the experience they're having. It is always on my agenda for the inspiration it brings.
ToT numerous times - excellent! TJ!! Awesome! I didn't realize he was still in the same role as when the Travel Channel special was made.
Muppets - yaay! The friend who met me down there on my most recent trip is a major Statler and Waldorf fan and I actually found him a talking Statler and Waldorf Christmas ornament at my local drugstore. The Muppets is where I always think about another too soon vanished creative amazing funny guy, Jim Henson. I love the shop and all the fun stuff in and on the building housing the movie not to mention the joyous wackiosity of the pre-show and movie itself.
I ride the GMR out of nostalgia rather than any wow yippee for the ride itself. I think they could make it fun again, but I wonder if it is one of those rides destined for oblivion.
And despite the intrusion of real life difficult reality phone calls, you managed to see Fantasmic, close the park at dinner (with At-at action) and then still go on for more! Osborne lights, DTD and Disney Quest - you guys rock at packing the day! (I learned a handy tip about the Osborne lights this year. When we were waiting for the TSM party to start, we hung out watching the lights. The park was closed but they weren't shooing people out yet so we asked a CM what the deal was. They said that although the park closes at 8, they don't close the lights until 9. There was hardly anybody there which was a total treat.)
Thanks for sharing a sweet dream of a day!

 

[AmericanCaesar]

Circusgirl, it seemed like there were NEW things inside "OMD" that weren't there last year -- I don't know if it was my imagination, but maybe some things on loan to Anaheim finally came back home?

 

[Circusgirl]

Circusgirl, it seemed like there were NEW things inside "OMD" that weren't there last year -- I don't know if it was my imagination, but maybe some things on loan to Anaheim finally came back home?

I agree - the Peter Pan model was something I didn't remember from before. It is encouraging that there are new things as I am always worried about them closing this exhibit.

 

[girlbomb]

Your description of Aggro Mom has me laughing hysterically. I can't tell you how many of these kinds we encountered on our last trip. We sat next to a Mom like that during our first Soarin' ride. Quite the experience. I have to go relive that with Marc when I sign off the DIS.

I'm hesitant about trying Teppan Edo but I have read so many great reviews that I just might have to book it. It looks so yummy and fun!

Lady Lallie, I can't believe we both encountered Aggro Mom at Soarin'! Though I suppose that's where Aggro Mom hangs out... And I do recommend Teppan Edo, though the meal took a while; it was a delicious and fun lunch.

(I learned a handy tip about the Osborne lights this year. When we were waiting for the TSM party to start, we hung out watching the lights. The park was closed but they weren't shooing people out yet so we asked a CM what the deal was. They said that although the park closes at 8, they don't close the lights until 9. There was hardly anybody there which was a total treat.)

Circusgirl, thanks for the tip! I love lingering as late as possible, but not if I feel like I'm breaking rules, or keeping CMs from going home after a long day. Knowing that they plan to stay open until 9 will leave us free to streeeeeetch out the enjoyment!

And now here's Day Five, Part Two: Girlbomb the Red-Eyed Reindeer Rides Some More

After our lunch at Teppan Edo, it’s about 2 p.m., and I’m so tired I can barely keep my eyes open – as much as I want to browse the shops downstairs and hang out for Miyuki the candy lady’s next show, I know we need to get back to the room for a nap. We’ve got tickets to the Christmas party tonight, and I want to be able to stay as late as we can! So we take the long trek back to the monorail, which comes fairly quickly, but stops a few times on the track. It’s delayed for a full five minutes at the MK, and stops again between the MK and the Contemporary, so by the time we get back to the room, it’s almost 3, and I’m full-on cranky. I’ve done a good job so far in preventing this kind of exhaustion, but today I did not do so, and I’m dangerously close to (cue Rod Serling voice)…the Meltdown Zone.

We change into sleepwear and lay down for a nap, but the ongoing construction on the fourth floor of the Contemporary is in full swing for the day, and it is loud. This is the first time it’s been an issue for us this trip, but right now, when we badly need naps, it’s extremely inconvenient to hear jackhammers and drills. We search for some soothing music on the clock radio, and tune in a Tampa Bay station called “The Dove” (WDUV, 105.5 FM), where they are playing the Bee Gees, Carly Simon, and other light hits of the 70s. Perfect! I love that stuff. It doesn’t drown out the jackhammers, but it does add a soothing layer of sound over it, and Bill manages to drop off for a few minutes.

I am not so lucky. As tired as I am, I can’t seem to rest, because my mind is spinning. So once again, I start crying like a baby, so frustrated that I can’t get out of my own way long enough to enjoy our vacation.

After almost two hours in the room, I realize that the situation isn’t getting much better, and I’m not getting any rest, so we might as well get back out there and have some fun in the parks. So we get suited up again, and I grab the Tigger ears Bill got for me off eBay – it’s party night, and I’m putting on the ritz! Our party tickets stowed in my fanny pack, along with my phone (ugh), we head back towards the MK.

But this time, when we join the throngs of people flooding towards the gates (uh oh), we’re the ones who can’t seem to make the turnstiles work – our party tickets aren’t going through. The helpful CM turns them over and points out the problem: Today is Tuesday the 9th, and these tickets are for Thursday the 11th.



WHAT? How can this be? I ordered these tickets months ago, according to the schedule that’s been set forever; did I make this mistake, or did Disney? How could I have ordered the wrong day? And how could I not have noticed before? Now I’m really ready to spiral into a tizzy, as I see that tonight’s party is sold out, and we have ADRs at Le Cellier for Thursday… The plan, the glorious plan, the one we’ve been working on all year, is suddenly in jeopardy!

But before I can wholly meltdown, Bill suggests that we go to Guest Services and see if we can exchange the tickets. And though the party is sold out, the lovely and helpful and life-saving CM at the window swaps our Thursday tickets for ones that allow us to enter right now, and enjoy tonight’s party, as planned. Phew! Just the pixie dust I needed tonight!



Relieved and ready to party, I don my ears, which instantly garner me some compliments, and we hit the parti-fied Main Street around 5:15pm. I am definitely treating myself to some fudge from the Confectionary – mmm, milk chocolate with marshmallows! One piece satisfies the two of us as we press on towards Tomorrowland, and we take two trips on the TTA in succession without having to disembark.

Wait times are long, and Fips are gone, so no Space Mountain for us just yet. But Monsters Inc has no line, and we have a few more jokes to text to Mike Wazowski. Bill’s is: What did the bartender say to the horse who walked into his bar? “Why the long face?” Mine, too, is set in a bar: What did the termites say when they walked into the bar? “Is the bar tender here?” Both of them are groaners, but we give it a shot anyway, and both are used in the show! Hooray!

It’s getting dark now, and we pass by the crowds in the hub to get to the Jungle Cruise, which we’ve never ridden at night. But the line is long and unmoving, and, after noting some crates addressed to the Adventurer’s Club, we decide to bail and come back later. Instead, it’s over to Aladdin’s carpets, something else we’ve never tried…and probably won’t do again, as they’re kind of a snooze. But you do get a lovely view of the park:

And at least we finally tried the carpets! Now the only rides we haven’t done at the MK are Dumbo and the Carousel – maybe we’ll save them for the mythical 2012 trip with our friends and their little girl, as I don’t know how much excitement we’d get out of them as DINKs, shmooopy though we may be.

Then we decide to take in the Swiss Family Robinson treehouse, which has a really different feeling at night, and is nearly abandoned. We take our time exploring all the rooms and artifacts, and I remember that this was one of the attractions our departed friend Samantha was most interested in seeing on our 2005 trip, the one she never got to enjoy with us. It certainly is beautiful and peaceful up here, peering out between the branches; it feels like a respite from the zaniness going on below us. But soon I’m eager to get back to the zaniness, and we descend, and head back to the Jungle Cruise, now posting a twenty minute wait.

I wonder if Adventureland always feels like this at night, or only on party nights, but there is a special atmosphere tonight, where it feels like we’re getting to ride the rides after hours. The line goes quickly, and we’re loaded onto a boat with a witty young skipper, who does his best to make the script feel fresh. There’s something spooky about the ride at night, which isn’t an unwelcome feeling; it has a little bit of its mystery back, something it usually lacks during the day. Even the jokes have a different feel – it’s almost like gallows humor. All in all, one of the better rides we’ve had on the Jungle Cruise since our first year, when we thought it was a hoot.

After the cruise, we wander over to Pirates of the Caribbean, which I have to call “Pilates of the Caribbean,” since I recently started taking Pilates. There’s no wait, and we enjoy every second of our trip, scanning the familiar scenes and always appreciating something new about them. I’d love to ride the Disneyland version; I look forward to getting there someday! But in the meantime, we’re very happy with this version, especially with that handsome Captain Jack around.

By now, it’s time for dinner, and we’re lucky that Pecos Bill’s isn’t totally mobbed right now – it only takes about five or ten minutes to get our veggie burgers, and to load them up with what is essentially a side salad made of fixin’s from the toppings bar. We get a good table outside, in full view of Splash Mountain, and notice how deep people are lines up for the parade – no wonder the rides were mostly walk-ons, as EVERYONE is busy lining the sidewalks right now. We’ve seen the parade the past two years, and don’t feel the need to watch it again tonight, so it looks like we’ll have good luck with short waits for rides tonight while everyone else is otherwise occupied.

I don’t feel like getting wet, even a little bit, right now, so we skip the very short line for Splash and join the very short line for Big Thunder. I make sure to hang on to my precious Tigger ears, as I hear that this here is the wildest ride in the WILderness; both me and my ears manage to survive, and are exhilarated by a trip around the mountain.

The parade’s in full swing as we take the path by the river to get back towards Liberty Square, and the path is so jammed with strollers, ECVs, and people stopping to gawk, that we hit a complete stop and are getting pressed from all sides. Not a good feeling at all, especially when you’re a shortie; I can feel the anxiety rising in my chest. And we’re not at home, so I can’t bellow (as I am wont to do, when people are blocking the sidewalk on Broadway), “Gotta move, people!” (Hey, I’m a native New Yawker, it’s part of my birthright and my responsibility to say things like that. I recently heard a tourist say to her friend, after such an outburst by me, “Now that’s the New York I was expecting.” Just doing my job, lady…) Some people take it upon themselves to start walking on the stone ledge, and I tuck myself behind Bill’s comforting mass as he presses onwards; we finally manage to get through by jumping over a rope into the exit area for the Liberty Bell. Phew! I can breathe again.

But despite the massive crowds for the parade (or maybe because of them), there’s no line for the Haunted Mansion, and we can take another happily haunted ride past the spooky sets. The banquet scene is still my favorite, but I do love the new attic scene, and will always find something new to admire in the graveyard. Afterwards, we stop at the merchandise cart, as we always do, hoping for some actual Mansion swag instead of just Nightmare Before Christmas stuff, and lo and behold! It’s a book about the Haunted Mansion, one we’ve never seen! Super bonus win!

Oh boy oh boy oh boy. We grab a copy of the book and present it to the lovely CM, asking her if we can have it sent back to our room. “As long as you’re not leaving in the next two days,” she says, and I reply with dead seriousness, “Oh, we’re never leaving.” For some reason, my delivery cracks her up, but I keep my face sober. Seriously. We’re never leaving. I don’t know what’s so funny about that. It’s just a fact.

Psyched by our unexpected and totally awesome purchase, we stop by Ariel’s Grotto to watch the Ladies Tremaine host the dance party. It’s now a tradition for us to stop at the dance party so I can play emotional vampire and feed off of all the kids’ happiness – last year, I was moved to sobs by the sight of a very happy young girl in a wheelchair, waving her arms in the air and grinning to beat the band – but this year I feel self-conscious and weird. Moments like that can’t be planned, nor can they be recreated; they have to happen spontaneously. And as much as I love the Ladies Tremaine, the DJ is playing stuff I don’t know, and there doesn’t seem to be much reason to hang around.

So we move along to the teacups, and get right into a happy green cup, which Bill spins faster than physics should allow. I like to lean my head back and watch everything run together like a wet watercolor; upon leaving, I am extra careful to lean on the cup for balance before striking out on my wobbly legs. I wish I could spin as fast as Bill, so that he could lean back and enjoy the world blurring around him – maybe after enough Pilates, I’ll be able to.

Then it’s cocoa and cookies time at Cosmic Ray’s. Except they seem to be serving food tonight, and not treats – huh. There is a dance party in progress, though, and they’re playing Thriller, so I MUST jump in immediately.

Here I am, in my Tigger ears, being thrilled:

(There is also a short video of this event, taken without my knowledge or consent, but it may never be seen by human eyes, on pain of death.)

I have an AWESOME time dancing, though I worry that Bill is bored (not much of a dancer, him), and so I wrap it up after a few songs and bounce over to him like the Tigger I am, asking, “What do you wanna do next, huh? Huh? What’s next?”

Well, if you’re going to ask Bill what’s next, the answer’s going to be…Space Mountain, duh! There’s no line, and we scoot right on to a rocket and blast around the track – wind in our faces, tastes in our mouths, screams in our ears, the whole thing. We couldn’t be having more fun!

And then I check my phone.

Dumb, dumb, dumb. I get a message that really upsets me, and I try to shake it off while we find a spot for Wishes on the bridge to Tomorrowland, but I can’t. I tell Bill that I give up – I can’t keep trying to force this stupid real estate deal to happen when nobody else will play ball – and he gets upset, and then I get mad at him for being upset, and everything suddenly sucks. We manage to get less upset with each other in, literally, less than two minutes, but the fact remains: this deal is not going to happen, and I can’t save it.

So the fireworks begin, and I am having a replay of last night, where I want to be in the moment, I want to be enjoying this immense and spectacular thing we love and look forward to all year long (it’s Holiday Wishes! Come on!), but I don’t even know what I’m looking at, because my eyeballs are melting from stress. So about halfway into it, I say to Bill, “I can’t watch this right now, I have to go return this call.” And I stalk over to the path between Tomorrowland and Toontown, the most deserted place I can find, and as soon as the noise dies down, I pull out my phone and make the call to say okay, I give up, forget it. Deal’s off.

And I feel both anger and relief in making the call. Relief, because I know that, as soon as this call is over, that’s it. The phone is staying in the hotel room for the rest of the trip – no more calling the lawyer, or the broker, or the whoever else I’ve been trying to negotiate with – just me and Bill and Disney World. Enough.

A funny thing happens as I’m making the call – a cat darts out from behind Star Traders and runs into the bushes around the Speedway. A cat! We’ve seen all kinds of wildlife here, but we never expected to see a kitty. I hope the kitty manages to be well-fed, and that someone will find and adopt it, if possible; we have lots of friends here at home who are involved in feral cat reclamation, and I bet Disney is good about taking care of the wild animals who try to make the parks into their homes.

Anyway, the phone call is over, and so is the deal. I’m upset, I’m disappointed, but you know what? I’m in Disney World. And I’m finally going to get to enjoy it, uninterrupted, without the constant phone calls and emails of the past two days. “Space Mountain,” I command, and Bill follows me through the blessedly empty line, where I get the first seat in the rocket, and boy am I grateful for it.

Arms in the air! Wind in the face! And shouting the whole time! Because it’s acceptable to shout while on Space Mountain! And nobody can tell if you’re shouting from frustration or fun; it’s just “AAAAAHHHHHHH!” Very cathartic; I only wish I could ride the first car on Space Mountain every time I felt like screaming my head off!

We check our party maps and see that goodies are being dispensed at the Noodle Terrace, so we walk that way to grab cocoa and cookies for Bill, and some apple slices for me. The apple slices, which I’ve had a few times so far this trip instead of fries, are really crunchy and sweet – a great substitute for cookies. Then it’s back to Space Mountain to scream some more, a no-wait trip on the AstroOrbiter to fly some more, and then it’s almost bedtime.

But first, that retail therapy I was denied last night! We enter the Emporium on Main Street, and I nab my Ariel sweatshirt (which is turquoise, with a slightly ruched collar, and portrays the rebellious teenaged redhead whose scene in Philharmagic always puts a lump in my throat). I also see some Disney jigsaw puzzles, and as jigsaw puzzles are my number two guilty pleasure after Disney World, I have to get them as well. I’ll shop for my friends’ kids later – tonight, I’m shopping for me.

Bill doesn’t want anything for himself, silly man, so I pay for my purchases, and we head back to the hotel. It’s 11:30 when we hit the room, and I’ve had every emotion possible in the last few hours. I went from the sheer delight of dancing to Thriller with a bunch of seven-year-olds while wearing Tigger ears, to the pits of anger and frustration of the phone calls, to the relief of shouting my brains out on Space Mountain, a ride I love with all my heart. Now it’s time for bed. And I KNOW, as much fun as we did manage to have today, tomorrow’s going to be even better. After all, it starts with 8:05 breakfast ressies in Cinderella’s Castle – how much better does it get than that?

(Thanks for reading -- more tomorrow! And I promise, the trip really does get better from here! )

 

[Lady Lallie]

I am so grateful that the nice CM was able to exchange your tickets for you. That would have been meltdown worthy if not.

Jungle Cruise is so nice at night. I think I am going to take your tip and try Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse at night too. I think in general that the parks are even more magical at night, I love that nighttime atmosphere.

As horrible as it is that the deal didn't go through, at least it was resolved so you could enjoy the rest of your vacation.

 

[PinkPrincessZ]

I'm so glad you were able to put reality behind you and have a blast - good for you! I love the idea of dancing to Thriller with Tigger ears on - can life get any better??

Looking forward to your breakfast review!

PPZ