The Neverending "Disney" Story

[DisnsyDog]

When I woke up this morning it was negative 12 degrees. I am not talking windchill actual air temperature was negative 12.......On days like today there is only one thing you can do. Think warm thoughts. For me that includes Disney. I love how warm it is there in May. I turn from a nice off white to a more natural bronze. Let me introduce you to the 4 members of the cast:

DH: Sam the Eagle. That is right I am very serious all the time. I enjoy heat lamps, being economical, and the nightly business report (on pbs, yeah I know I am pretty lame.) My motto: Sounds great.....what does it cost?

DW: Mary Poppins. She is the Planner. You think you like to plan. DW likes to plan with a capital P. Despite the planning she manages to be very caring, loving, and patient. Very rarely does she say spit spot. But when she does DS breaks into song about Sugar being mixed with medicine and a spoon. It is very odd. Also she is very hott. Her motto: It is Disney-ish of course it is good.

DS, 5: Mickey Mouse. Oh my gosh. If this kid was anymore mickey mouse he would have a tail and large ears. His motto is: Hey, what is a motto with you?

DD, 3: Sleeping Beauty with a slight hint of Animal. She is a very complex 3 year old. She can be the sweetest thing you have ever seen, yet will turn on a dime in to a fericious little beast very similiar to Jack Jack. Her motto is: My way or the highway baby.


A little background information. This was our second trip to the Dis. During our first trip we were tipped off to the disney boards and thought the whole lot of ya had a wealth of information. However I thought you were also slightly screwy in the noggin. I mean seriously people forsaking your family to read the boards. Maybe I was just a little angry because I would come home from work to find DW was on the boards all day and the kids had declared anarchy and overthrew the republic. Maybe it was because she started talking in abbreviations, you know CBR, BCR, AK, AKL. I could not have a conversation with the women about anything other than the Dis. You stole her from me I was Marlin and you were a baracuda, that somhow regergitated my wife and a single egg to create a family of four. That is okay I know you didnt do it intentionally. Well the point is following the trip I myself, Sam the Eagle (who bought a 28.00 Sorcerer Mickey hat and wore that SOB, not a Dis abbreviation, every day despite the temprature) found my fifth love in the Dis.

Let me tell you one thing about my DW I love her with all my heart but good golly miss molly that women was obsessed. We watched the planning video more often than the news prior to this trip. Our nightly discussion was focussed on the length of our trip. She wanted two weeks I was hoping for one. We were like two prize fighters feeling eachother out. One night I would land an upper cut to the chin (figuratively) and we would agree on some unimportant item like bringing our own stroller (I am not paying to rent something I already have.) Note: Dec 06 trip we are renting a stroller. The next night she would counter with a hook to the body and I would cough up buying a DMVC (copyright Zzub) for each member of the family. Later I would agree to an extra day stay if and only if we purchased one community mug. The bottom line is half the fun for me is the negotiating. Generally I end up on the short end of the stick, but it is still fun. It isnt my fault I lose, my DW is good, this one time at band camp..... Um I mean at the Bahamas my wife had two of the shop keepers outbidding eachother for a wooden item.

Shopkeeper One: Baby doll i will give you that wooden snake for 13.
Shopkeeper Two: Sweetheart I will Do it for 11.
Shopkeeper One: Honey how about 10.
Shopkeeper Two: You get out of this sale Shopkeeper One!! Sweetheart I can do it for 8.
Shopkeeper One: You know I cant go that low Shopkeeper Two! Sir maybe you are more reasonable how about it then 9 for the wooden snake.
DH: Ummmm.
DW: No thanks.
DH: Wow..... You are beautiful......
DW: Right. Lets go to the beach I am tired.

Hmmmm it is warm in the Bahamas. Sigh.... Anyway, bottom line is I was knocked out in the third round KO. It was fun while it lasted. We settled on 10 nights in the dis with the dining plan. Thus I had to suck it up and pay retail. This was very difficult, as at the time i was an airline employee and could receive a 50% discount on lodging. Exactly.

One final note: I havent thought of a name for this trip report I suppose I will come up with it later.

Up next, Day One: The Departure

 

[pumba]

fantastic fantastic.......we are going for ten nights too.....can hardly wait......APRIL will be here in a few more months and I can be obsessed too....I mean excited........thanks for the story

 

[2infinity&B-ond]

Great report so far, keep em coming.

 

[DisnsyDog]

The Key for the day is make it on the plane. Pretty easy especially since our flight isnt until 5pm. I had the day off. DW had to work, but we are a group that rolls with the punches (just when you think the boxing references are done I slip one in there.) So I had a whole day to wait for our vacation to start. Our bags were packed kids were dressed house was cleaned and I had watched the planning DVD close to 5 times. Unfortunately it was only 10am. I still had 5 hours till we left for the airport. AAAARRRRGGGHHH! Finally, at 3pm DW got home from work and it was crunch time. We now had to get some food on the way to the airport and stop at the bank. Hey come to think of it I could have done either of those things while we were waiting for her to get home. Idiot, what was I thinking, obviously I wasn't thinking at all. Here we have a flight to catch to the greatest place on earth and we are going to make it tight. Hey I never said I like to do things the easy way. Well rest assured Disers we made it the airport with plenty of time.

I unloaded the bags, kids, and DW wished them well and took off for the parking lot. Yes I know we all could have taken the tram from the lot to the airport and saved time. But I am not about saving time I am about saving money after all I am very economical. So I will be parking in the airline employee lot which is free to employees however It is about fifteen minutes from the airport and they dont allow your family on the tram. So it really isnt met for this but what the heck. So despite the fact that this added 40 minutes for the roundtrip parking ordeal I was feeling pretty good. I just saved a bunch of money and didnt have to call Geico, ( I have called Geico and they never have been able to save me any money at all. Liars.)

Back at the airport my wife was instructed to checkin our three bags and print boarding passes while I parked the car. Upon my arrival she flags me down with all of our luggage and no boarding passes. I am about to go all Sam the Eagle on her, but I restrain myself as we are going to Disney and this was just a slight set back we are still about 1 hour from departure. No problem I check us in at the Kiosk and start handing the bags to the counter person. Now I am sure most everyone knows there is a weight limit on domestic luggage ( 50 Lbs. incase you were unaware), I should know as part of my job is to tell people everyday what the limit is. So guess what happens. That is right I got a bag that weighs in at 60 Lbs. AAARRRGGHH!! At this point I am refusing to pay the extra 25 dollars to allow them to just take the darn thing (economically minded remember). I have my Dis family claiming they are unaware of who I am as I am shuffling clothing items in the middle of the airport from one bag to the next trying to even the weight situation out. Clothes are flying shoes are shuffling people are gawking like they have never seen such madness. Finally I find the problem three packs of juice boxes hidden in one of the pieces of luggage. I was astonished I made to give DW a look of what the H-E-double hockey sticks is going on her but she took off long ago. So I get it all worked out and I hunt down my family that has now abandonded me during a Sam the Eagle spell.

After all of that DW looks at me, bats her clear blue eyes and asks, "What did you do all day, you are in rare form?" I think to myself, "you know darn well what I did all day watched the planning video, called you every half hour wondering how things were going at work, and thought disney-ish thoughts (in fact if Tink would have stopped by with a little pixie dust I could have flown to the Dis with Wendy, Michael, and John.)" However I say, "Umm nuttin." She smiled and kissed me on the cheek. Ahh much better. We wrestled the kids, stroller, two carryons, activities bag, dvd player, purse and partridge in a pear tree through security without incident. In fact I think that is comendable we did better than most business travelers manage. After we get our shoes on we make it to the plane which is now boarding, perfect timing.

Most trip reports at this point state somthing about the plane trip and move on to the Dis. I wish I could end the trip there but as an airline employee they afford you certain privleges. One of which is the 40 minute tram back and forth to airport, while your wife and kids wait, another is flying standby at a considerable discount. While doing such with your family to Orlando of all places is very dangerous it is very economical. But the pressure oh the pressure our whole trip would be for not if this plane had mechanical difficulties or weather trouble it would not be good. So after all of the passengers are borded the standby people are left standing in front of the counter eyes wide fingers crossed. You could cut the tension with a stick from a mickey bar. Then it happens they call our name, my heart leaps my wife looks up from the nearby seat we are on our way baby! Magic here we come.

 

[Vivianne]

I'm enjoying your report. Looking forward to more.

 

[DisnsyDog]

Thanks for the encouragement my next post is coming shortly.

 

[jakenjess]

Great start! Looking forward to more!

 

[OhMari]

Thank goodness you didn't end your story making us wonder if you got on the plane. Cliff hangers are so hard to take. Thanks for sharing your trip report.

 

[DisnsyDog]

The flight was uneventful which is always nice. However we arrived way past DS and DD bed time which is not so nice. In fact it was like when Prince Phillip in Sleeping Beauty busts out of the palace and makes it through the maze of thorns and sees the castle. You know he was thinking alright I am going to finally get a kiss from the Princess. Then from out of nowhere Malificent shows up and turns into a dragon. He probably was thinking the same thing I was, "Can you give me a break or what." Then she starts all those thorn bushes on fire and tries to eat him. Lucky for DW and I our kids do not have fire breath and were not trying to eat us. So I guess I should have been thankful. Although I would like to point out my DS and I have had several discussions on how to acquire this rare trait only given to dragons and small lizards (sorry mushu) and have it narrowed down to lighter fluid and a torch of some sort.

Then it started what is now known as the great Stroller Struggle of '06. We have a nice collapsable double stroller where the kids sit side by side. Well when a certain DD is feeling out of sorts she likes to throw some serious smack down on her brother as he is the nearest person. Well our poor DS was very tired this evening and was sitting in the stroller very nicely not saying a thing when DD wacks him up side the head and yells she wants out of the stroller. As we don't condone wacking of any sort in our house (except weed-wacking) immediately DW and I spring into action and are repelled by very ficious fists flying. DW rescues a very sleepy DS while I try and reason with a mini George Foreman (he was a boxer before the grill, which I do have and use on occasion). George is taking me to town so I tag my wife and she takes over while I step aside for a breather. As I look around, I come to the realization that I am almost thankful it is so late because the terminal was empty with the exception of our flight so only about 200 people had witnessed this instead of 2000. My wife bribes mini George with some candy and she quiets enough so that we are able to follow the mickey hands to the magical express.

to be continued

 

[ZZUB]

I like where this is going. And not just because you referenced the DMVC. Anybody who goes all Sam The Eagle on somebody is my friend.

But I am not about saving time I am about saving money after all I am very economical.

Very Zzub-like. I approve

I have called Geico and they never have been able to save me any money at all. Liars.

That's just plain funny!

Looking forward to more.

 

[jeanadave]

This is gonna be a good one! Trust me (though you don't know me) -- just trust me!!

 

[dismom9761]

Great start!!Looking forward to more....

 

[Vivianne]

Keep them coming we really appreciate your efforts.

 

[DisnsyDog]

So off we go, me now carrying DS, Two carryon luggages, and a dvd player, while my DW pushes the doublestroller with DD, activity bags, the other carryon, and the partridge in the pear tree. Wait where is the partridge in the pear tree. We forgot it on the plane oh well as long as we have the juice boxes we should be okay. Finally we check in with the Disney express people whom I have very serious disscusion with regarding our checked luggage (hello, our juice boxes are in there, people, what are you going to do if they dont make it? will you provide us with some sort of beverage in leiu of the juice boxes? Or will we end up becoming dehydrated and forced to go long disney days without the preferred beverage of the juice box?) The Disney Express lady reassured me (rolled her eyes) then I heard my daughter start to throw down on my DW who was strolling her over by a baggage carousel. I said thank you (rolled my eyes) to the kind Disney Express lady and went to assist with the most recent DD drama. However I started to retreat as the sucker she was previously bribed with went flying by my head and smashed into a million pieces against a wall (lucky for me I have cat like reflexes even around midnight, that could have been my head shattering into millions of pieces.) I guess DD liked the mini explosion and settled down.

As we get into the Disney Express line without the checked luggage and more importantly the juice boxes (they should magically appear at our room) I see five busses all a quarter full and ten people in line. Upon this I am relieved as I expect to be magically wisked to my bus and to Pop Century. After about 20 minutes the short little man on the walkie talkie running back and forth with a clipboard from bus to bus lets us board. Now understand this trip was in May of 05 (when they first rolled out the Disney express) but there is no reason we had to wait 20 minutes to get on our bus. Didn't walkie talkie see me almost taken out by the flying debris coming from the mini tornado known as my DD. Finally we made it to our hotel room. Within minutes of our own arrival the infamous juice boxes were delivered. Oh so were our clothes for the rest of the trip (obviously not as important you can't drink clothes, can you.)

Up next: Day Two: Let the Magic Begin

Sorry about the two short installments I was dealing with some technical issues.

 

[Minniespal]

Enjoying your reports ~ Keep 'em coming

 

[DisnsyDog]

Due to our late arrival our first day was planned as a late day, you know get to the park around 10am-ish. However DS gets up around 800a and wakes everyone up when he turns on the TV. Sam the Eagle doesnt like this Sam must sleep or Sam make heap big trouble for little DS. Then it hit me like a sucker to the noggin. We are finally here and according to our chart today is an MK day. Lets move it people we need to hurry up and have fun. While my DW showers I prepare the kids waiting for my turn in the warm waking mist (I know I am not in one of your fancy resorts but seriously give a person a little water pressure, didnt Disney get the memo I am paying rack rates here.) I also am looking over the touringplans.com late arrival Magic kingdom One-day touring plan for adults. Incidentally our trip coincided with the opening of the Magical Celebration and there was great concern over crowd levels. The kids were fighting DW was yelling but I was focused. We had slaved over making modifications to these plans to suite our style and it was crunch time I had to ensure that I could tell any member where we were supposed to be at any point of todays tour. Then I realized the people around me were all yelling at me. I was standing in front of the TV. Oops. I slid to the side polished off my juice box (mmmmm, warm juice in a box) and hit the warm mist machine Disney calls a shower.

It is 930a and we are walking off the Pop bus towards magic kingdom. It is one of those perfect Florida days, blue skies, warm summer breezes, birds chirping, there was magic in the air. I would just like to note that in the great state of minnesota we get days like this maybe on 7-8 occassions a year usually in July (When I woke up today it was 0 degrees.) The local yokals say this keeps out the rift raft. Personally I agree which is why I have been trying to convince DW that we must move south as I am the defintion of rift raft. As I am soaking in the great atmosphere my fun about 50 feet ahead of me with both kids in the double stroller yells back at me to get going there is fun to be had, there are games to be one, and the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winningest winner of all.....Umm I dont think she said exactly that but I did run to catch up to her. We get through the security check and roll onto mainstreet.

Finally we are there after months of planning, hours of travel, and two DD dramas we are in everyones happy place. This is not the time to stand around and take in main street ( in fact I have never really taken in mainstreet) we must hurry up and have fun (as fun is very elusive.) DW says, "Spit Spot" and DS starts singing about spoons of sugar, which is still strange to me, and we double time it to frontier land to get some FPs on splash mountain. About half way down mainstreet my DW stops dead in her tracks, and I almost run her over with the stroller. I wonder what would drive her to such madness as the 8 dollar balloon guy is lurking nearby. Oh yeah there is a great big castle in this park. DW comes back to me and says eventhough they put all of that weird stuff all over it that castle still takes my breath away. She gives me another kiss on the cheek and we start off in a slow jog towards splash mountain.

On the way we spot meeko and pochahantous standing all alone, no friends, nobody to talk too. Of course DD saw this and jumps out of the stroller like she ws shot out of a cannon. Luckily I saw this coming and stopped the stroller just before running her over (another tragedy averted due to my cat like reflexes.) Now there are a few charecters even as an adult I would like to hug (yeah even Sam the Eagle has a soft side, but only in Disney otherwise he is a hard a**) and Meeko is one of them he looks like an extra large high quality stuffed animal. But I resist the temptation (I am not a total weidro.)

Finally we are off again to splash mountain but wait we could walk on the flying carpet ride, DS and I love this ride. Even to this day we talk of how we drive our carpet into the stream of water shot out of the camel and duck allowing DD and DW to get shot by the stream of water. We ride this twice and move on to splash mountain. This is DW's favorite ride. This is the only ride she can remember from her childhood trip which only lasted one day. Poor girl. Of course she is trying to make up for lost time by going for 10 nights every year (despite the loss of cash flow I cant complain.) As the wait time was minimal she takes DS on the ride and I grab FPs for BTMRR (my favorite Dis abbreviation) with DD. She is somewhat distraught as she isnt on the ride with mom so we look for a mickey bar. If DW would allow me to put pics of our kids on this board this would definitely be one of the pics I put up. She had mickey bar all over the place, hair face arms stroller. It was great, generally DW would go off on me if this happened, but because we were at the Dis I was commended for putting a bib on her. I love this place.

As DS and I head for BTMRR DW says to meet her over buy some store as she and DD will be shopping (gulp.) I give her a Sam like look and head off for some fun. I very much enjoy rollercoasters and Disney is by no means a rollercoaster park. BTMRR ( I am trying to get that abbreviation in this installment at least 10 times) is a kiddie ride based on the standard of rollercoaster I enjoy, but for some reason this is one of my favorite rollercoasters of all times. Maybe it is the Disney magic, or the incredible scenery you go through, or maybe it is because my DS who is very timid gets his courage up to go on the big rollercoaster with Dad. Whatever it is I wish they would sell it (at a discounted rate of course.)

Upon reconnecting with DW and DD I see they each have huge mischivious grins (not good) and a large Disney bag (yikes.) DW sits me down and goes over the first Disney purchase. It is a very cute disney outfit for DD. Despite the magic surrounding us I am not able to stop myself (It is my motto after all) "Sounds great.....what does it cost?" Immediately DS interjects "Hey, what is a motto with you?," DD yells, "My way or the highway baby!" yet despite the madness somehow DW restrains herself kisses my cheek and whispers, "It is Disney-ish of course it is good." (see cast member description for reference.) Now I was just confused and hungry. We moved on.

To be continued....

 

[Cinerama]

The trip report board is HOT! So many good ones to keep up with and now I'm adding yours to my list. Thanks......and sounds like you found plenty of that "elusive fun".

 

[DisnsyDog]

We hit the Jungle Cruise, which we neglected last year. The ride director made fun of my hat (it's a Cubs hat) mocking how terrible my team is. Luckily she turned her efforts to the elderly gentelman sitting directly next to her. He must have fallen asleep with his eyes open just like Curly (played by Jack Palance) did on City Slickers because he didn't move the entire ride. But wait Curly died during that scene, well we didn't wait around at the end of the ride to see if the old man was dead or alive because I was ready for a little Pecos Bills. I really enjoy the toppings bar and double cheeseburger (I am on vacation that is allowed.) You know it is similiar to an Applebees burger (overcooked and over price, yet better than fastfood) on a smaller scale of course.

After we indulged in a burger and a wrap (yeah we share food because it is both economical, and it is like 80+ degrees outside no matter how hungry I am it doesnt seem right to eat like that, unless you are in an airconditioned restraunt with plans of taking it easy for a while) we headed for one of my favorite shows. Mickey's Philharmagic is just great, but was rather uneventful as was the rest of the day. I am not saying we just sat in Philharmagic for the rest of the day although I am sure you could if you wanted (has anybody tried?) You know we did the regular stuff hit rides avoided gift shops (of course that is next to impossible) and got FP's for rides which had like a ten minute wait (we were just following the touring plan.) Then we headed for our 530p ressie at 1900 Park Fare.

We hopped on the boat which took us to the Grand Floridian. On our first trip we never really visited any of the other resorts so this was kind of exciting. We meandered through the GF grounds where we see the cinderella carriage being pulled by a white horse with two people who must either be on their way to get married or just got married in the distance. As I saw this I immediately look at my DW who looks at me then we both look at DD. She hadn't seen it, most people would have hurried after the carriage to get a glimpse for thier little princess however I deemed it to dangerous. I have two reasons for thinking this: first if she had seen the carriage I am sure she would have started yelling about wanting to pet the horse and ride in the carriage, second she would remember this was a possibility for her wedding (this would have been fine if I won the Powerball the other night but I didn't, however the lady at the gas station said I won three dollars on an old ticket so that was pretty sweet.)

When we made it to the main lobby my wife went to change DD into her cindy dress while DS and I tried to look like GF material (we sat around pretending to read a newspaper, smoking a pipe, complaining about the graduated income tax.) Well no, actually we rode the elevator up and down a few times (it was a nice elevator and no one was on it, I thought it could use a little action.) After DD and DW returned we were scolded by DW regarding our elevator fun and went to the opening ceremony at 1900 Park Fare. This was cute with the confetti throwing and the Godmother appearing from behind the door, but my kids love confetti (DS swears it is treasure) so when the confetti went flying they hit the floor and started picking it up as fast as possible shoving it into their pockets. DW and I scurried to pick our kids up who yelped like little puppies being teased with a treat as we pulled them away to our table.

I was really excited for 1900 Park Fare as one of my favorite menu items is prime rib. Although it was a buffet and generally that means the food is not the greatest quality I was thinking, "it is prime rib, it is pretty hard to screw that up." Well as hard as those cooks at Disney tried to screw that hunk of beef up it was still edible (if this was anyother place than disney I would have been very disappointed.) I was having a problem with the guy carving the meat, did this happen to anyone else or just me?

DH: Seriously I have been up here three times now, we are on a first name basis, you know I want the prime rib yet you ask me what I care for?
Meat Carver: Ummmm
DH: I care for the PR baby and stop cutting me three tiny slivers at a time. Chop me off that chunk right there, give me a steak knife and I will take care of the rest back at the table.
Meat Carver: Ummmm, I can't do that.
DH: What...I am sorry did you just say you can't do that. Oh, well I guess you didn't get the memo I paid rack rates. Stop wasting our time and slice.

That is what should have happened but I was in Disney and DW does not like outbursts so I just ate my tiny slices and liked it. At this point I would like to note that DW does not like Prime Rib and ate from the kids buffet the whole time. As a result of this I felt it was important I eat her portion of prime rib in addition to mine, while at first this sounded exciting and adventurous it was not a good plan. I stuffed myself silly (imagine a queasy Sam the Eagle stumbling around 1900 Park Fare, not a pretty sight) and we still had to go back for rides and Wishes.

Now that we got the important stuff out of the way I suppose I should tell you about the characters. The pink and green shawled mouses stopped by for a spell, which while exciting, was uneventful. Then the prince came by. My DD refused to look at the guy. He kept telling her how she was such a beautiful princess yet she glared in the opposite direction of him with her arms crossed. My wife taking pity on the poor prince (so she claims) abruptly stood up and said take my picture with him. Then Cindy came, my DD was jumping up and down this was the first time she has ever seen a real princess. DD and cindy had a short discussion regarding the similarity in their outfits, got a photo op and moved on. DD was good to go for the rest of the day. Not to mention DS who had all the cookies and pizza he could eat.

After dinner we headed back for MK on the monorail. We hit mainstreet much slower and rounder than we did earlier in the day. We hit some more rides including Buzz. Our family loves that ride. DS and I have a stategy to beat DD and DW everytime. We make sure we get the car in front of them and when our blasters turn on we swing around and blast DD and DW. This totally throws them off and confuses them they usually duck to hide from the blaster rays and while DS pins them down I aim for the Zs. Good times.

After our rides we grabbed a spot right where the plaza flows towards tommorrow land up against the railing. I spotted the cable tink slides down to ensure the best tink view possible. Let me tell you it is a great spot, unobstructed by trees and is slightly off center so you dont have to wait forever to hold your spot. DW instructed me to get popcorn in a collecters bucket (she has a fetish with collecting souvenier mugs and buckets) so I waited in possibly the longest line in the history of popcorn lines. After about 30 minutes and the announcements by the announcer that Wishes was to start shortly I was worried I was going to be stuck waiting for popcorn during the show. Luckily this was not the case being, the astute person I am I get water in addition to the popcorn and head back to our spot. I am almost run over by two strollers ( I know it is hard to drive those things when you aren't paying attention because the castle is "magically" changing colors) and as a veteran stroller driver myself I can testify that I did not cut anybody off or jump in front of them.

Upon arrival I am greeted by the begining of Wishes (my family was there too.) I get the camera ready for Tinks fly-by. We chose this spot to once and for all put to rest the great, "Is tink a real person or not debate." Well let me say if tink is not real the Disney imagineers are holding something back from us, becasue as tink went by about 30 feet above us she was kicking and waving in a way that could only be human. It was awesome. What made it even better is I swear I got a great pic of it, or so I thought. I must be one of the last people in the world with a 35mm camera and we never found the print when we developed our film. This was one of the most important pics ever taken by this camera and somehow it disappeared. I don't know exactly what happened maybe the Pop Century cleaning staff was notified about the picture and secretly confiscated it or maybe Disney magically overexposed the film during the fly-by, there are hundreds of conspiracy theories but, the bottom line is somebody in Disney does not want the flying tink on film.

Anyway Wishes was great. I have never been disapointed (well I was once but we will get to that later) the fireworks are outstanding. I can only compare them to one other firework experience. During the fourth of July when I was 13 at the very beginning of the fireworks production a small fire broke out by the people setting them off. Over the course of about 5 minutes every single firework went off. I was partially deaf for the rest of the night, but I knew I would never see anything like that again. However that was before I had ever been to wishes, while it doesn't pack the same punch of pure power it is a total assualt on your emotions. The music, the backdrop, standing near thousands of other Disney fanatics (maybe a little two closely,) I get a little teary eyed just thinking about it. After Wishes we plodded out of the park with the rest of the cattle (no I am not calling you a cow DW, calm down it is a figure of speech) towards the long queue to get on the Pop Century bus.

Up next Day Three: The Big Ball of Love

 

[DisnsyDog]

As park commandos, to successfully accomplish your mission you must set out certain objectives. Our main objectives for this trip were:

1. Make it to a park opening ceremony (a role over from last year.)
2. Collect every single character's autograph (not my idea.)
3. Spend as much money as possible on souvenier mugs (again not my idea.)
4. Eat lots of food (I can proudly say this was my idea.)
5. Try and use our mini golf tickets we got last year (for free I might add.)
6. Visit Downtown Disney (I was successful in steering us away from this Disney size mall last year.)

I also would like to include my personal list of objectives (before doing so I would like to let you know the great risk I am putting myself at for doing so. A couple of these items I have been denying for the last year and a couple I have not been suspected of.)

1. Do not visit Downtown Disney (It is against everything in the name of being economical.)
2. Do make an attempt to hold back the Sam the Eagle face when DW buys an eight dollar souvenier mug that doesn't allow free refills (GRRRRRR.)0
3. Use the assertive commando aspect that has taken over DW against her. For exampIe, "I really dont want to stick you with these crabby kids, but we have a schedule to maintain so I better get on Mission Space."
4. Attempt to get a little crazy with the alchohol one night. While this might not sound like a big deal to some of you (I am talking to you Vettechick99) it is a cardinal sin to do so in front of the kids in this mostly sober household.

Day Three is an Epcot day according to our schedule and is also Mothers Day. Originally we were scheduled for the highly coveted mothers day brunch at Epcot, which was scheduled to be a Hero's Brunch, but being economically minded we settled on discarding our PS (or whatever they call them these days) for an additional day stay.

This was it, yesterday was like a test run to see if we could handle the pressure of following the tour guide. We had to be in sync at all times, If I had forgotten what ride we were to head for next DW had my back. We had memorized the park maps (seriously doesn't everyone do that,) we made sure to go to the bathroom before we left (going to the bathroom doesn't concern a ride, show, or overpriced food, that is not why we are here,) and we slathered on so much sunscreen we looked like albinos. Unfortunately we were waiting for the bus around 9am after all was said and done. That is okay, we are slightly behind Schedule but we can make up for it with our speed, agility(note:we drive a side by side double stroller) and above average knowledge of Epcot.

As we got off the Disney bus we took action. I threw open the stroller like a DISer opening Disney marketing material. My wife pulling both kids behind her throws the kids in their seats while simultaneously sliding the "emergency bag" onto the stroller handles (yeah I know she is good.) Then we were off, dodging and weaving through traffic like a short track speedskater on our way through security and into Epcot. After a few photo ops we head for the Land to get some FPs for soarin and to ride Living with the Land. After the ride our FPs were valid and we headed back Soarin. The plan was to have DW and DS ride while I wait in line with DD then when they were done DW and DS would come back for DD and meet me at the exit. The unofficial guide book has a name for the stragety but I call it the (ditch and sigh, DW ditches me while I sigh.) I think the ride operators that day must have been new or never read the unofficial guide (I suppose they only read the official guide, whatever,) because they said we werent able to use this stragety. So being completely shot down I tell DW to get on with DS and I will meet her at the exit then I will run back into line. However DD did not like this plan she wanted DW to stay by her, so DS and I hit the ride (see personal objective number 3) as DW and DD pout while returning back to the entrance. When DS and I return from Soarin (which DS deemed the best scary ride ever,) I see DW pouting over a dirtcup (some sort of pudding dessert, DS deemed the best thing ever.) Being the great DH husband I am I tell DW about how great the ride was she just missed. She gives me the look of death (was it something I said,) I quickly backtrack and tell her to take DS on Soarin (we have two more FPs) while I manage DD. At this DS yells, "Mom I will hold your hand so you don't get scared," and DD gives me the look of death (was it something I said.) I tell DW to go before I change my mind.

It was just me and DD now. Not good she looked like she was about to blow. While throwing her tantrum DD tried to stab me with a spoon full of pudding. Luckily my cat like reflexes (I was still nimble as we were only on day 3) caught DD off guard and she flung the spooned pudding on the floor, narrowly missing my leg. Just like with the sucker the destruction calmed her down. Luckily DW and DS found us and we were off to the Figment ride thing. While figment was proabably really awesome when it first opened, well no come to think of it I bet it never was awesome.

We hit lunch at the Electric Umbrella.The whole reason we went to the place was for the 5.00 lemonade they sell there. Eventhough it was against everything I stand for, I was willing to try it just to see what a 5.00 drink without alcohol tastes like, but the CM either didn't deem me worthy of the Lemonade or they discountinued it, I prefer to think I wasn't worthy. After lunch we went to get FPs for the GM marketing tool aka Test Track and I went to ride Mission Space. This is by far my favorite ride in Epcot (anytime you spin me in a circle so fast I feel like I am in a washing machine, I am a happy camper.)

After I got out of spin dry we hit the other mediocore rides in the Future world area. What is up with spacship earth? I mean this is the ride in the big ball of love how can they hold out on it like that. They really need to make some changes I mean put a Chipotle or Starbucks in there. After the disapointment that was spaceship earth (that is right you see that it doesn't even deserve to be capitalized) we head for our PS at Akerhus with a planned stop at Test Track.

Upon arrival at TT DS decides it sounds too loud and goes to fast for his taste. Thus I am elected to take a spin leaving DW with the kids (see personal objective number 3.) TT is such a highly regarded ride I thought it would be great, well I was really let down. I think this is possibly the most overrated ride in Disney. It would be great if you went faster than 60 mph (I was really starting to enjoy it then we ran out of track and slowed down.) Once I got off the ride I shared my insight with DW who looked at me like I just insulted her intelligence (remember her motto.) She said I was in charge of the kids as she headed for the entrance. The kids and I hung out at the GM coloring table while waiting for DW. I would like to note that for the first time all trip DD did not try to injure me in any way (it is the small things that count, like not being maimed or stabbed.) DW returned and all was right in Disney as she gave rave reviews for TT.

We head for another visit with the princesses, this time at Akerhush. My DW was very worried about what we were about to eat at Akerhush. Being from Minnesota (which has a very large Norwegian influence) one would think this restraunt we would make us feel right at home. Well I would like to take the time to point out that as Akerhush is neither a pizza place or a Famous Daves she had great reason to be concerned. Personally knowing that Norwegian food is very bland I packed my airplane-alcohol sized bottle of tabasco sauce (okay, I wasn't thinking, I left it at home, it would have come in handy though.) Once seated we delighted ourselves with the food of the people of Norway. The most memorable food item of the entire meal were the scrambled eggs. That is right they actually serve scrambled eggs, oh but these are special eggs, they are served cold. Cold eggs, I felt like I was at Denny's, except the table was clean and our waitress wasn't a 40 year old chain smoker named Dorris. I should have sent the eggs back just to see what would happen. I think the conversation would have went like this:

DH: Miss, our scrambled eggs seem to be a little on the cold side.
Waitress: Right....Did you read the menu?
DH: Yeah I did.
Waitress: Then you saw cold scrambled eggs didn't you.
DH: Right, I saw that, I thought that was a joke. I actually laughed a little.
Waitress: It looks like the joke is on you.
DH: So you aren't going to take them back and warm them up for us?
Waitress: I would but you are on the dining plan so eat those eggs.
DH (with a mouth full of cold eggs): Wow, these are the best cold eggs I have ever had.
Waitress: I will let the chef know.

Waitress (back in the kitchen): Has anyone had a complaint about the cold eggs yet.....No.. All right it looks like I won the pool tonight. How much did I win....Wow $50 TGI Fridays here I come.

I am still suprised that anyone would go through the trouble of making nice warm scrambled eggs only to let them cool off and serve them, then have the balls to say it was on purpose. I can't believe we paid $30 a head for cold eggs. Okay that is enough, I am over it... Wait no I am not we took our trip in May of '05 (a beautiful time to go by the way) and I just wrote three paragraphs about being served cold eggs. Lets move on....... The rest of the food was just as we had expected it to be bland with a capital B. DW refused to eat her small plate of fish and just about anything else in front of her out of fear for her taste buds, while I dabbled in a little of everyones dish. I also had the fish which was well, fishy I guess. I tried a little of DS's spaghetti which reminded me of a very refined can of Chef Boyarde spaghetti with a side of bland. Needless to say we weren't impressed. That was until the princesses appeared.

I can hardly believe that my DW wants to return to this place. The food was laughable and last time I checked it was a restraunt. Well I was way off this is a princess restraunt. That means they can make your daughters dreams come true and feed you cold eggs. I do have to be serious (I am Sam the Eagle after all) for a moment, we saw Aurora, Jasmine, Arial, Alice (Alice in Wonderland, non princess sneak,) and Cinderella. Each time they glided across the dining room my daughter gasped and jumped up and down pointing. She still likes to look over the signatures in her autograph book and talk about meeting royalty. I felt like I was in a mastercard commercial.


to be continued....

 

[Somefunmum]

This is a really good one! I can't believe that I didn't see it until just now.
So many quality trip reports at once! You're spoiling us.

He kept telling her how she was such a beautiful princess yet she glared in the opposite direction of him with her arms crossed.

Hilarious! She sounds like a real character herself.