Taking the whole family!!

[neverlandclub]

We tried, before just sying "enough, no more", to go on a trip with very limited prescheduled group ressies. We told everyone that since we all had different routines (early risers vs. sleeping in) we should just do our own thing and meet up when possible (Dh managed to avoid everyone else all trip & had a great time) Seemed to work until the end when we were informed that we might as well not even come together. Well,.................... So now its the secret trip with no guilt

I am glad some families can do this every year but ours have just changed too much. No one should ever feel guilty in Disney, it ruins the magic and causes the pixie dust to fall right off!

I can fly!
I can fly!
We can fly!

 

[photobob]

One of the things I've always enjoyed about going to WDW with my wife, son and daughter is that we spend the entire time together just the four of us. We always get along so well and have such a great time. This past year my SIL and her husband and two of her children wanted to go with us. My wife and I decided to make sure everyone had radios and/or cell phones so that if they weren't ready to head out the door when we were for them to catch up later. Our trip went much better than I had anticipated, that being said I'd still rather travel alone, but it was very nice for the children to enjoy time with their cousins. I don't think that I'd EVER want to go to WDW with a very large group though.

 

[punkin]

On Thanksgiving 2002 I went with my sister's family. I am a big planner and early riser. My BIL sleeps late, is controlling, and has no clue what he's doing. Overall, it went well. My daughters and I were there 3 days before my sister and her family arrived. We did whatever we absolutely wanted before they even got there. I had Reservations for the whole group at BOMA for Thanksgiving dinner and we followed my commando-style touring plan at MK on the Friday after Thanksgiving untill 12 pm (after we finished our 8 am breakfast at the castle which my sister refused to call for at 7 am 60 days in advance because she was sure we could just walk in-my niece loved it, as did my kids...I'm glad I got up to do it). Other than that, I let my BIL do whatever he wanted and did not offer any suggestions unless asked. We all had a great time because I refused to obsess. It was kind of nice just going with the flow and not pushing yourself to a plan. Bottom line. I would do it again to spend time with my sister, but it was much easier going alone. I think next time, I'll just take my niece and leave her parents at home.

 

[Jacksmom99]

After several trips with relative, for which I was grateful and enjoyed most of the time, DH and I planned our trip last summer for just us and the kids. Our past trips with relatives haven't been horrible, but as with all families, stressful times, agendas, and some arguements always happen. (I should point out, that all trips were with DH's relatives ) Well, this past year was almost a disaster. We were staying off site in a free house from DH's uncle, but he lost his access card to the community pool. August with no pool access So, one day we decided that we'd stay one night at the VWL in order to spend the day at the pool. We were able to check in nice and early and get right to the pool just in time for a MAJOR thunderstorm to hit and not let up for the rest of the day. It rained everyday, and if we left the parks, we were stuck in the house or shopping, not much of a vacation. Anyway, the point of that story was that the kids (DS4 & DD1) were really getting on our nerves, our nerves were frazzled b/c the vacation was turning out to be a flop. DH called his mother part way through the vacation and she reminded us that this was the first time that the 4 of us had been completely together 24-7 by ourselves for over a week. This kind of clued me in that having another family member along can be helpful after all, but it needs to be with someone that you can be compatible with. No one is going to get along perfectly all the time, but you have to be comfortable with the other parties so you're not on edge all the time.
That being said, I can't wait until this summer when we are taking MY family!!!! I've made a schedule and emphasized that everyone is free to do their own things. My SIL and DB already said that they'll do their own thing sometimes. We'll use cell phones and play it by ear.

 

[reddog]

Oh - I have to respond!

Four years ago I thought we'd live out the dream of having my parents and brother come along with us (husband and then three year old son). Dream turned to nightmare (well - just a very stressful, not-fun vacation in a place I love!).

A variety of things happened of which I'll highlight a few. Before leaving, my Mom called our Florida relatives to let them know we were there. So, for two days before my family came to join us, we had to visit with those folks (who I love - but it becomes less than a vacation when you need to meet people at different times). Then when my family arrived, more came but with no set plans, we ended up spending almost all the days there "meeting" family at different times. If WDW was in Oklahoma, I would not have this problem!

My father bemoaned every price and activity and just wanted to hang out without going into the parks (he wasn't going to even buy himself a single pass), my mother wandered away in MGM while we were all trying to make plans on what we would do first (took an hour to find her!), and my cynical brother rolled his eyes at almost everything and then told me at the end that he and his girlfriend just didn't like anything they did!

The other kicker was that my family kept telling my husband and I that they would watch our son for one night so we could go out - never happened, mostly because I didn't push them on it and let them come up with their own plans each evening (although one night at 10:30PM with everyone in bed my Mom did suggest it - we zipped out to The Adventurer's Club (but we were exhausted the next day). The last day there my mother decided we shouldn't eat out that night because we still had food in the fridge! My husband and I said we wanted to, and we went to Artist Point with our son. Turns out the rest of the family went off to Epcot to eat anyway.

I did prepare my family (or so I thought) by giving them Christmas gifts of the video and Birnbaum's book so they could have an idea of what they would like to do (my family has been to WDW before so it wasn't like they didn't know what to expect). I didn't want to push tons of plans on them, but I realize now that specific plans were needed before we ever got there.

I love my family dearly, but on joint vacations each one of our flaws was magnified 1000%. ( In case you're wondering what my flaw is - I whine a lot when faced with grumpiness, cynicism, and cluelessness!)

So, we are going back (just my husband and now two sons) and we haven't even told anyone! I know it will come up soon enough since I can't tell my seven year old not to say anything, but we have high hopes this will be a much more relaxed trip for us than four years ago!

ADVICE - Think of each person's negative qualities and have plans to work with them. They will not necessarily go away because you're in the Happiest Place In the World!

I feel better writing this!

 

[wilderness01]

Ok you are all making me nervous. We are going with family later on this year. We go to WDW often so we are the so called "experts" and the rest are the novices. I am excited to see the looks on their faces when they get to the parks. Anyways, we will all have cellphones and can communicate like that for meeting times, places, etc. We have gone on vacation with a large group of friends before and it worked out well. You were free to go as a group or do your own thing. That will have to be our motto for this trip also.

 

[toystoryduo]

Okay... I'm getting a bit nervous too. My DH and I thought it would be a great idea to take his side of the family to WDW this December for their first trip. We have been there several times already and want to share the "magic". Now, I'm not sure that this is a good idea.

For one thing, my BIL and SIL like to sleep in. (Think noon or later..) Plus, they tend to take their time getting ready and can be disorganized. When we are at WDW, we like to get up at a decent time and take our time in the parks. I think that the other members of our family would feel the same way.

We also thought (ha, ha) that everyone (15 of us) would want to be together most of the time. That we would ride rides together and share the Disney experience. Our family has had some issues to deal with over the past year (who hasn't?), and we thought that if we left Ohio, we might be able to become closer as a family again. Isn't that what the WDW DVD implies? However, I now realize that people may want to go their separate ways. If so, then why do the family vacation?

I don't know.. I was very excited about the prospect of a family vacation at WDW. My DH and I thought it would be great to show everyone around and help them see the magic too. Now, I'm very hesitant and somewhat nervous. Disney isn't cheap and I would hate for all of us to spend the money if we are not going to have a good time.

Please keep the information coming.... Also, please keep sharing your experiences so that we may better plan for this trip. Thanks!

 

[Jacksmom99]

Originally posted by toystoryduo
However, I now realize that people may want to go their separate ways. If so, then why do the family vacation?

Who says all the family memories have to be created out of 24-7 togetherness? Let's face it, only "stepford" families could be around each other that much and not have any issues. I'm a control freak (do NOT tell my DH I admitted that ). I don't want to control everyone else, I just don't want anyone controlling me. My biggest complaint of traveling with a group is all the time wasted while everyone sorts through their own personal agendas trying to decide what to do. I agree with everyone else who said "lay the ground rules ahead of time...agree to meet for a few special events (dinner ect.)...be upfront with the costs...and be flexible. Having one or two events where everyone attends and has a good time makes for much better memories than a week of forced togetherness with everyone arguing. Actually my DH had the best advice for me: Don't make my expectations too high trying to plan a magical vacation for everyone, then I won't be dissapointed if something goes amiss.

 

[kadaten]

I just planned a trip for 20 family members at Disney in December. We had a great time, but mostly because we laid the groundwork ahead of time. Being the experts DH and I (pretty much just me, really) planned everything. We know the family well and that everyone has their own speed, likes, dislikes, and maintenance levels, so we did our best to anticipate those.

For instance--took 7 smaller parts of the family. 4 of those are VERY picky about everything....so I talked up the advantages of the Deluxe resorts and we stayed at AKL. There would have been complaints at moderates (outside entrances, no bell service, distance between buildings/food court/bus stops/etc) so by staying at AKL, we cut those complaints before it started.

I knew they'd constantly ask us for advice and tips and directions, so I made up a welcome book that had basics of everything, suggestions on where to eat, how to get to all our planned events, and a calendar of our events so they couldn't forget.

I put out from the beginning that since it's a vacation, and everyone is supposed to have fun, that everyone would be free to do their own thing so they'd be guaranteed to have fun!! We planned one group event each day (mostly dinners) and I made them opt in for it...they had to email me a "yes" that they wanted to do it before I called to make PS....but they were free not to do it, even though it was a whole-family event. For instance, one couple had friends in Tampa they hadn't seen in years, so they skipped one dinner to drive to Tampa to see their friends. No big deal....we saw them all the other 5 nights!!

We got an extra room at our resort that we used as a hospitality suite, that we put in a fully stocked fridge (beer, sodas, milk and juice for the kids), tons of snacks, decorations (it was Christmas!), and copies of all our Disney info and planning books. It was important to us to have a place to gather, without imposing on anyone in their room. We met there every evening to recount our day's adventures and see who was going where the next day. If folks were interested in the same park, then they went together!

The only hitch was my mom (the rest of the family was DH's). She couldn't get with the program. In spite of agreeing to meet at the elevator or hospitality room at a certain time to leave for the park, she was never there and had to be fetched. (She stayed with DH and our kids since the rest was DH's family and she wanted to spend time with the grandkids. It might have been different if she had someone else to walk around with, but she's single, so we were it.) At the parks she only took smoke breaks when we were trying to get somewhere, rather than when she was waiting for us to ride something (she's not much of a rider). Just didn't think ahead and consider others.....

Overall, the trip was a huge success. Since everyone DID have a great time (they got to do what they wanted...not get hauled around everywhere by me who did all the planning) they now have me planning a summer trip for all of DH's family at the beach. Let's just hope I can make it as magical...I like these free vacations!!

Good luck! A large family trip can be fun, as long as you're realistic. There's no way to have 10-20 people up, dressed, and ready to walk out the door at the same time....in a lot of families it's too much to ask to have 2 people ready at the same time!! For some it won't be a vacation if they have to wake before noon, but for others it won't be fun unless they're at the parks open to close. Navigating a park with a crowd like that is VERY difficult and trying, and when you add in different ages and interests, it's too much to expect everyone to stay together the whole time. Make everyone happy! Plan some opportunities for family togetherness (meals, events, etc), some for small groups (backstage tours, golf, cruise), and leave time for the individual families going to plan their own thing.

Have a great time!
Katie

 

[msmouse]

My sister and I just returned from a trip. We each brought a friend. Usually, our trips are with my son and his girlfriend, but due to a new job, he could not get away. We did have a great time, but there are just some people who don't "get it". They are the ones that look at you funny when you tell them you are going to DW "again". Anyway, my sister and I spent a great deal of time trying to please the guests. Every event was prefaced with "Do you want to do this, or would you rather do that? After a while, that is exhausting. There were times that I saw "eyes rolling" and sometimes it appeared that they were not having a great time. So, I think our future trips will be with those that "get it".

 

[toystoryduo]

Kadaten~
Glad to hear that you had a great trip! We are planning a vacation in December with 15 family members (DH's side) and the advice you gave is very helpful!Thanks!

Does anyone else have any family experiences that they can share that would help us plan our trip?

 

[tink2]

We've been on 3 trips to Disney with my family-my parents, brother & wife & kids, and single brother. This year 4 more joined us- cousins! The first 2 trips we had 11 and this year 15. The first year we all had small kids that couldn't ride big rides and everything was pretty perfect. My niece is older now and likes to ride thrill rides- which DH and I do too- so not much of a problem, just have to be creative with FastPasses and occupying the younger children. We usually spend 80% of the time together- especially in the beginning of the trip. That being said- we are all go-getters. Get to the park before opening, commando the first couple of hours with a plan of priority rides, watch the parades, and stay until after the night shows. My mother cannot always keep up and will sleep in a couple of days- meeting us in the park later. We do split up some and ride different things- different aged kids now. We always have a meal together- usually a character meal at lunch. The last day we usually split for half the day- we all need it by then. This year my brother and family spent the last day at Sea World- we didn't think our kids were old enough yet to sacrifice a day at Disney. We stay at a resort and get three different rooms- that helps- instead of a home away from home. We need that separation. My cousins that went this year did not fall into this plan. They are not go-getters and ended up seeing us only at meals. I think you just have to communicate with each other your priorities for the trip and expectations. The only tense moment we had this year was when one of our tickets got lost in FastPass and everyone had different ideas about how to deal with this- my brother went to guest relations and some wanted to all stay together until he came back while others wanted to split up and ride different things. It worked out!
Good luck and have a great time- and remember, Disney is about magic and family!

 

[dizzyintx]

My DH inherited some $$$ and he wanted to take my whole family to WDW. There was 18 in all. It had always been my mother's dream. We had a blast, but I agree with the poster that said to think of everyone's negative qualities, and have a plan to deal with them all.

My SIL is always late to everything, WDW was no exception. We spent a lot of time waiting on her. SIL was always MIA, and we spent time looking for him. The main problem was that 2 of us were in wheelchairs and everyone wanted to stay together, to help.

So the moral of my story; get cell phones or walkie talkies. Plan only part of your day together and WAIT FOR NO ONE.



Oh and BTW we just got back from a trip to WDW by ourselves and had a wonderful time.

 

[ColoradoDis]

I think it's too much like work if I have to coordinate everything. We enjoy the trips when it's just the four of us and WE get to make all the decisions.

 

[Tiggerlover91]

The last time I did the "family thing" at Disney was back in 2000. It was the most miserable time I ever had in Disney. It was me, mom, sister, and my sister's 3 daughters. I paid $1500 to go to the happiest place in the world. I called DH every night in tears and I ran out of spending money about 4 days into a 6 day trip because sister decided she didn't have enough spending money to bring, so she decided to let mom cover it!! I was so ill!! I vowed to never do that again. I'm glad my neices got the opportunity to visit Disney, but I'm not too sure I'll be able to do that anytime again soon. Maybe just sister and I and the girls as our relationship has changed quite a bit since then, but mom can stay home and I will tell her that too.
DH and I went the next year and celebrated our 10 year anniversary at Disney and we had a WONDERFUL time! That's the only family I go to Disney with!

 

[ChairborneRangr]

Check out the picture in the sig...

I planned an outing for, as my 16yo DD put it, 35 of our closest friends and family.

I started planning a year out. We had so many people that I was able to work with WDW Group sales. WOW what a difference! I created plans and crossreference sheets, I put together powerpoints on each park and the resort we were staying at, plus DTD, BW, and POLY (for family night activities). They were required to attend a meeting where I presented all the info before I would include them in the group and take their deposit. We had one family that thought they could do better planning on their own... *chuckle* We took 35 people to WDW for 7 nights for ~$550 a person including airfare, Resort, and Passes.

My youngest 2 hadn't been there before, so we told everyone that we were doing the "kid ride" tour and that they were welcome to join or go their merry way. We planned in 2 water park days where everyone was together and a family evening. My family (half the group) went to BOMA, others went to DTD and BW. Our first day (EPCOT) was extensively planned, but after that each group did their own thing. We would have ad-hoc get togethers as we met people around the park.

It was a great experience. I dis everything I could to prepare info for everyone, then I brutally set the expectation. Everyone knew where they stood.

Yes, I would do it again! In fact I am helping plan for a group between 100 and 300 (children's ministry workers for our church)

If you can arrange a group with 10 rooms or more, things get a LOT cheaper! You can even use the online codes in conjunction with the group ressies!

We didn't have any posterior-craniums along on this trip. If you have one of those in your family, I'm sorry.

All I can say is, we had a good time!

Oh, I almost forgot... David Smith and Darlene Krubsack were my contacts. I can not praise them enough! They were fantastic. My youngest got pneumonia in early May and was terrified that she'd still be in the hospital when everyone else would be in WDW. She LOVES Minnie Mouse and was heartbroken. I told Darlene about it. A couple of days later Michaela got a care package from none other than MINNIE MOUSE. addressed from her and everything. It included a signed picture, an 18" plush doll, pen's, refridgerator magnets, note paper, and other trinkets I can't think of right now. It meant a lot to Michaela. She still has all the stuff on the wall, and Minnie is with her every night.

 

[Tinks]

My only word of warning to anyone traveling with a group and planning the do- your- own- thing- and- meet -up -later technique is to make sure the other parties know that is your plan. We went to Disney with my parents and sister and her family in 2000. I read guide books and planned out my family's activities well. I remember having conversations with my sister prior to our trip...she didn't plan a thing. She was clueless.....and she travels not our style..she sleeps in, walks realllllly slowly to absorb the atmosphere???? or figure out where she is???lol!

Long story short, we were at every park opening and had a fabulous time. My sister was disappointed that we weren't together all the time If we had tried to wait on her I would have gone insane and our trip would have been a dud. Make sure the other people you travel with know that you would love to meet up with them...but not spend every waking moment waiting on them.

In May 2003 we went to Disney with 3 other families. We all agreed to be on our own and met up for several dinners or shows or swim times back at our resort. It was a wonderful trip...our favorite to date and we are all planning it again for May 2005! I can't wait!