Suffered a miscarriage this week

Aburns8

DIS Veteran
Joined
Sep 24, 2008
I have been married to my DH for 5 years and this year we decided to start a family. To my excitement I found out on February 25th that I was pregnant. Well, this past Wednesday (March 23) I went to the ER and had a miscarriage. I have had my good days, but today was a bad day. Hoping to have a better day tomorrow.
 
I'm sorry for your loss, I know how difficult it can be. We never know what the future has in store for us though -- I lost a baby when I was between 16-17 weeks, after trying to conceive for years. After that I had been ready to give up trying when I found I was pregnant again. My second son was born a year (almost to the day) after my loss.
 
I know how you feel. I found out I was pregnant on January 17th...4 days before my husband's 40th birthday. I gave him a Bruins (his favorite team) onesie and bib as an early birthday gift. We were so excited. I learned on March 5th that I was losing the baby. My husband and I were devastated. I had a D&C on the 8th. The entire experience was heartbreaking. There is at least one moment every day that I break down. It's just so sad.
 


My wife and I are going through the same thing. We found out on February 4th and she began miscarring on March 9th. She is still going through it physically and mentally. As for myself, I have my good days and bad days too. I find that when I am not doing anything, that is when I start to fall apart. This would have been our first child. All I can say from one griever to another is hang in there. Hopefully it will get better. (I'm still hoping.)
 
I am so sorry, I had a misscarriage back in the 80's and they were thought to be twins. Please take your time for your grieving. You will both get through it together.
 


We are all here for your support. While most of us have never experienced what you have, we still are here to talk and show you we care.

Remember to always talk about it, it is ok to do so :)
 
Thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers. We decided that we are going to try again in a couple of months. I am hoping that this time we have better luck. Today is an okay day. My DH had to go away on business this week so I am by myself (we don't live by our families anymore).

Sorry to hear about other losses. All we can do is move forward. :grouphug:
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending happy thoughts your way! :flower3:

I had two miscarriages, one pretty early on and the next one a bit later in the pregnancy. I was crushed so say the least. It took me a long time to get the courage to try again. About a year after the second miss I found out I was pregnant again but I couldn't even get excited about it in the beginning. I think it took me half of the pregnancy to really come to terms with the fact that I was having a baby.

I wish you all the best :hug:
 
So sorry for your and your husbands loss.:flower3: I also suffered a miscarriage a few years back and although I have moved forward I still think about the what ifs. I do however have a DS10 who is my light. I wish you peace and strength to get you through this time. :grouphug:
 
So sorry to hear this happened. We have no tried to start a family, but I know of a few people who have been trying to start family and I can only imagine how difficult it must be. Much love to you and your hubby and hoping that you feel better quickly.
 
Aburns, Eeyoreprincess, and nickyb's wife

I am so sorry for your losses. I have had 2 miscariages in the past. The second one required a D&C. My heart breaks for you all.

I have a few words of advice. Don't allow the "what ifs" the "would've" "could've" "should've's to creep into your thoughts. They will beat you up.

Also realize that family and friends can say some really bizarre things. Many have not been in your shoes and don't understand. They probably want to help, but don't know how.
 
To all those that have lost their precious babies you have my sincere condolences.
I think miscarriage can be a very misunderstood loss and it is the right of any parent to grieve.

Best wishes to all and be kind to yourself.:grouphug:
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending happy thoughts your way! :flower3:

I had two miscarriages, one pretty early on and the next one a bit later in the pregnancy. I was crushed so say the least. It took me a long time to get the courage to try again. About a year after the second miss I found out I was pregnant again but I couldn't even get excited about it in the beginning. I think it took me half of the pregnancy to really come to terms with the fact that I was having a baby. I wish you all the best :hug:

I know just what you mean. I miscarried at 15 wks on Christmas Eve back in 1990. It took me a very long time to work through the grief. It didn't help at all that my DH wasn't supportive (thats a long story that I won't go into right now.) When I finally did get pregnant by chance in 1992, I had a very difficult time trusting my body to work, so I had a lot of anxiety. But everything turned out well and I went on to have one more after that. :thumbsup2

OP, I feel your distress. Having a miscarriage was one of the most searing events of my life. It takes some time to grieve the loss, so don't try to push through it. Let it happen, feel it, process it, and then you will be able to move on. My daughter would have been 20 this year. In the beginning I thought about her almost constantly, but after a time the thoughts lessened and the pain lessened. I still think about her from time to time, but it's no longer painful. It's just an event in my life, like other strong memories. I hope you can get some rest and heal quickly. :hug:
 
My sincerest sympathy for all who have miscarried.
I agree with the poster who said family and friends that are trying to help often say the most bizarre and hurtful things. Forgive them, they most likely don't understand. I always said it is the death I have no gravesite to visit. Bless the unborn. They remain in our hearts. I pray you all find peace with this loss.
 
I think the end of October/November is going to be hard. We would have a newborn. We booked a cruise for early October in January before we were even pregnant. I was going to have to cancel it and now we are going on it. So it be hard to not to think where I would be in October while on that cruise if I was still pregnant.
 
My sincerest sympathy for all who have miscarried.
I agree with the poster who said family and friends that are trying to help often say the most bizarre and hurtful things. Forgive them, they most likely don't understand. I always said it is the death I have no gravesite to visit. Bless the unborn. They remain in our hearts. I pray you all find peace with this loss.

Thank you! The worst is everyone who said "Oh I had one and now I have 2 (or 3) kids." I hate to say it but there are no guarantees that we will have a healthy child. I guess I am thinking too negatively.
 

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