Strange Baby Name Question

[Briarmom]

What do you say to a friend that is a second wife who wants to name her baby boy the SAME name as one of the children from the previous marriage? Both children would be named for the father with junior on the end. Apparently her husband has agreed.

Tell her you've decided to become a divorce lawyer.

Ok I have a different name. My name is Maryke but pronounced Marie kah. I really didn't like it that much growing up. I didn't like being different and having to always tell people how to say my name. I wanted to be a Mary or Jane lol. When I got to high school I really liked my name. I liked that I had a unique name. I knew when I heard Maryke that somebody was calling me and not anyone else. I am sure there were people that thought my parents were crazy for naming me this but I am happy to have my name now.

That's a very traditional name for...the Dutch I think? I've met several. Love your name.

 

[ryka]

That's a very traditional name for...the Dutch I think? I've met several. Love your name.

Yes it is. My grandfather came from Holland. Thank you.

 

[Feckless]

For girls, I tell people to put "Madam Justice" or "Paging Doctor" before their chosen name. If it sounds ridiculous, rethink.

 

[LittleMissMagic]

When I became pregnant, her word of advice was "Never tell anyone the name before the baby is born. Many people will tell you how much they hate it. Once the baby is born, no one will say a thing!"

That's the truth!

That and because you also don't want people "stealing" your name (but it sucks when it gets stolen).

We had a bit of baby naming wars in my family - my uncle and his wife were pregnant with their third son, and his brother and his wife were pregnant with their first child. Everyone pestered the stink out of the younger brother, asking them what they were naming their child. They wouldn't say a word. The older brother and his wife had told what they wanted to name their two sons before they were born... but since his brother was keeping secrets, they decided to, too. The younger brother's child was born first, and they named him after my grandfather - and his brother and his wife were furious because apparently they had wanted to do the same.

I'm kind of glad it worked out the way it did, though.... the older brother already had two chances to name their child after my grandfather.

 

[Miranda Danda]

Sometimes it is just better to keep your mouth shut -- I know I wish my MIL took that advice about five years ago. My wife was pregrant with our third child. Before she was born, we decided to name our daughter "Liberty". While the majority of our family loved the name, my MIL was very vocal on how that was a "terrible name". We ended up naming her Liberty, and the name fits well.

LOVE this name! Our DD also has a unique name (Jubilee). I love the fact that virtually no one else has the name, PLUS it has such a wonderful meaning: "joyful celebration". It also fits her bubbly, happy, outgoing personality VERY well!

 

[Miranda Danda]

Oh, and my name, while pretty normal, was chosen because of something weird. My dad has been in law enforcement (everything from a street cop and narcotics detective to police chief) since he was 19 years old. He named me Miranda after the "Miranda Rights". Yep, "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be held against you...."

I used to despise it, but I was probably the only four year old that could recite the entire thing verbatim.

I ended up following in my dad's footsteps and getting my BA in Criminal Justice. Before becoming a stay at home mom, I worked as a crime scene tech. All the officers LOVED my name and I was a hit. My name definitely fits me.

I think a lot of times people grow into their names. What they used to hate about it, soon becomes the thing they love about their name.

 

[spacemountainmom]

What do you say to a friend that is a second wife who wants to name her baby boy the SAME name as one of the children from the previous marriage? Both children would be named for the father with junior on the end. Apparently her husband has agreed.

Hi! I am Larry and this is my son Larry, Jr. This is my other son Larry, Jr.

Is this guy really so impressed with himself that he needs two Juniors???

 

[Mom_Rides]

I wouldn't say anything unless you're asked. If the child is unhappy with their name, they can always change it when their grown. My SIL hated her given name (it wasn't a terrible name just not terribly feminine and spelled incredibly odd) so she changed it. Kept the idea of the name but added some normalcy to it.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

It depends on the name. For the most part I'd stay quiet. There are plenty of names that kind of make me cringe that I know other people like. I won't say what they are here, because I don't want to insult someone who used them, but let's say I didn't like old fashioned names (I do like them, actually), I wouldn't say "Oh, yuck, Matilda, that's an old lady name". If someone names their kid Karoline, I wouldn't point out that it's supposed to start with a C. If someone names their kid Mitt or Barack, I won't tell them what I think of the individual most closely associated with their choice.

But I've known kids with names like DEMONtae or ARYANa (not spelled that way, just emphasizing the offensive word) and I wonder if no one said "You may not have noticed this spelling, but DEMON is not a great association for your beautiful baby, have you considered Damontae instead? I'd also speak up to someone who made what I consider an offensive choice, such as, for example, Adolph.

 

[Becky2005]

If someone names their kid Karoline, I wouldn't point out that it's supposed to start with a C.

Frankly, at this point I think I would tell them to keep the K...my DD is Carolyn and NOBODY can seem to prounce it correctly...we joke all the time now we should have spelled it "Karrol-Lynne" or something like that...I honestly thought Carolyn was pretty phonetic when we named her that but apparently not since she is always being called CaroLINE and we have absolutely no clue how to make it more obvious that it is "Lyn" -- I always think I should have done Carolynne to make it more obvious or something.

I wouldn't say anything unless it was something that was totally offensive. Names that I heard a few years ago that I went "HUH? what a weird name" -- have now turned up to the point that no one even blinks an eye when they hear the name.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Parents get to name their own children. Other interested parties get to have an opinion, which they can keep to themselves. Children grow up and become adults, adults can change their names whenever they want.

Which would be fine - if one's formative years didn't begin until adulthood. I'm not saying the OP should say anything (unless asked ), but kids can be cruel.

IMO even if she asks you should tell her it sounds lovely. Honestly,

That's an unusual segue - and yes, I know it's the beginning of both another sentence and thought, but it's a little odd that you encourage somebody to lie and follow that suggestion with the word 'honestly' .

Wouldn't it be kinder to use a more neutral misstatement such as, "that's an interesting (unique) name; have you considered how..."

 

[leebee]

I REALLY put my foot in it when we were home for Thanksgiving the year my sister was pregnant with her first daughter. In my defense, I ruptured a disc two days before driving 14 hours to get home for the holidays, and I did most of the driving. I was in excruciating pain and taking prescribed muscle relaxants, narcotics, and valium to try to control the pain and get some relief (and it wasn't working very well), so I really wasn't thinking clearly, shall we say! Anyhow, Dsis and i had talked about names before and I was expecting something kind of traditional/mainstream, like Elizabeth or Emma (two names we'd previously discussed). When she told me the name... "OldLadyName1, OldLadyName2"... my jaw dropped and I said, "ohhhhh nooooo..." (my DH said it would have been hilarious if it wasn't such a shocking situation). I didn't have all my faculties and just couldn't control my response, but my sister was SO offended and hurt (and rightly so). I just couldn't help it. Well, she finally got over it, and I apologized profusely, and my niece actually has a cute, trendy nickname for OldLadyName1 (both OLNames were from my sister's soon-to-be-ex's grandmothers), so it all turned out OK in the long run, but I sure learned a lesson that day... even though I still think I should have been cut a little slack, considering the situation

 

[RNMOM]

Stay out of it. I grew up with an unusual name (Cordia Lovell) and have survived. It is really not your business.

 

[MomNeedsVacay]

I;vve also learned to stop telling people my names before birth--too much "input".... mostly from relatives ---UGH! A quote from my Mother "OWEN? You are thinking about OWEN? Oh, God please don't make me have a grandson and call him OWEN?!" ... Yeah. BTW-- we do not have an Owen.

 

[spacemountainmom]

Frankly, at this point I think I would tell them to keep the K...my DD is Carolyn and NOBODY can seem to prounce it correctly...we joke all the time now we should have spelled it "Karrol-Lynne" or something like that...I honestly thought Carolyn was pretty phonetic when we named her that but apparently not since she is always being called CaroLINE and we have absolutely no clue how to make it more obvious that it is "Lyn" -- I always think I should have done Carolynne to make it more obvious or something.

I wouldn't say anything unless it was something that was totally offensive. Names that I heard a few years ago that I went "HUH? what a weird name" -- have now turned up to the point that no one even blinks an eye when they hear the name.

I guess you deal with dense people. Why would anyone call Carolyn CaroLINE???

 

[blana]

So long as it's not/doesn't sound like a "bad word", just keep out of it. That's why we refuse to tell people the names of our kids before they're born. Too many people don't like your choice for one reason or another. I can see if it's someone from another culture who might not be aware of "bad words" that you'd want to warn them.

 

[Becky2005]

I guess you deal with dense people. Why would anyone call Carolyn CaroLINE???

Your guess is as good as mine for that, all I can think of is because Caroline is the more popular version at least around here -- Caroline Kennedy anyone? Jackie Kennedy died the year DD was born and the name Caroline was everywhere at that point.

There are more Caroline's around here than Carolyn's. I was so used to mine being the only one from Kindergarten - 8th grade (and it was a typical grade school, then combined Middle Schools from the grade schools), that when I introduced myself to the High School choir teacher Freshman year, I introduced myself as "Carolyn's mom" and didn't even think to use the last name since DD was the only one in the entire school previously, until the choir teacher inquired as to which Carolyn -- then it dawned on me that it was possible in high school for their to be more than 1.

So, after that I figure no matter what you name your child -- even after thinking long about all the what if possibilities and trying to make sure there are no ill effects -- there are some things you just can not foresee happening (and not just with my DD -- it has happened with all of my kids & their names -- which are basic names but somehow a problem crept up with each of them).

 

[MariDisney]

Frankly, at this point I think I would tell them to keep the K...my DD is Carolyn and NOBODY can seem to prounce it correctly...we joke all the time now we should have spelled it "Karrol-Lynne" or something like that...I honestly thought Carolyn was pretty phonetic when we named her that but apparently not since she is always being called CaroLINE and we have absolutely no clue how to make it more obvious that it is "Lyn" -- I always think I should have done Carolynne to make it more obvious or something.

I wouldn't say anything unless it was something that was totally offensive. Names that I heard a few years ago that I went "HUH? what a weird name" -- have now turned up to the point that no one even blinks an eye when they hear the name.

Maybe we can trade kids. I have a Caroline and it gets pronounced Carolyn probably 75% of the time. Sine I have a unique name that is continually mispronounced (I get Marie, Mary, Maria, etc.) I thought I had a surefire easy name with Caroline. Nope.

 

[Becky2005]

Maybe we can trade kids. I have a Caroline and it gets pronounced Carolyn probably 75% of the time. Sine I have a unique name that is continually mispronounced (I get Marie, Mary, Maria, etc.) I thought I had a surefire easy name with Caroline. Nope.

Which is why, sometimes I think the more unusual names MUST be easier to pronounce once you learn the proper way to pronounce them -- they would stick in your head easier but maybe not.

Although, I could never be a teacher -- I would never remember all the kid's names or pronounce them correctly (heck...I knew a "Shaun/Shawn" for 3 years before I knew his name was spelled Sean and wouldn't have even realized that was how you pronounced it except he was in the school play & I knew what part he was playing so it clicked!)... Of course, nowadays, I think Sean is the more popular spelling anyway.

Which is why I also stand by unless it is something so wacky that it is an offensive name....I would just let it be and honestly just because they tell you a name before the baby is born doesn't mean they are going to stick with that name after the baby is born -- I know most people do but some don't...or you could be like me and not even have a clue what you are going to name the baby until after it is born! My poor 2nd child didn't have a name for 2 days.

 

[Handbag Lady]

My friend was pregnant with twins. When they were born, she told me their names.

The first one was a fine name. The second one was a fine name.

But, when put together, they made the name of a famous quarterback and she had no idea. The boys are now three and she is constantly asked if she is a fan of that particular team. She hates football.

Had she told me the names in advance, I would have warned her and she would have changed one of their names.