Sharing a bedroom on vacation

[shawthorne44]

OP, could you update us with what you decide?

 

[la79al]

OP here-we are going to go with it and hope for the best. The kids got together with some cousins yesterday and I think the trip is all they talked about the entire day. Some of the other parents can't stay the whole 2 weeks and my dad has asked to keep their kids so that is his mindset. Current plan is to put little 2 kids together in the top loft. It won't be ideal but I'm guessing the 6 year old will be pretty exhausted most nights. 10 year old has the potential to stay up most of the night reading so I am going to be buying her a booklight and making her a little basket to hang on the edge of the bed for her books, etc. Oldest is perfectly content to be on the floor. I'm hoping to fit an air mattress in the space for her (my brother actually asked me to move the dresser to the other bedroom for him to use because he never has enough drawer space) and then use some command hooks and a sheet to give her more of her own space. We will be taking along the toddler cot (in case we can find extra floor space for it) and all of our air mattresses so we can fill the living room as needed. My brother, stepsister and husband will all be heading home at some point mid trip so we will have opportunities for anyone who has had enough to just come home and stay with friends. None of the kids are complaining about the current plan so I'm thinking we might be okay.

ETA-for those of you suggesting tents and basements, etc- the kids ask every year if they can sleep on the balcony. That's just not something we feel safe with as we are only on the second floor. Similarly I would not feel safe letting them tent in the backyard. The basement is actually the garage and if we get desperate I guess we could go that route but I don't think we are there quite yet.

 

[Needsanap]

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[Needsanap]

We used to use a small tent in a hotel room. Could fit a single air mattress in it. Gave my dd the privacy she needed.

 

[tarheel618]

Just a thought for the older one sleeping on the floor- Ive seen sleeping bags that have a blow up mattress in them. Its the size of the sleeping bag so that maybe an option

 

[sk!mom]

This was my takeaway. Let's be honest, no one needs to come to a discussion board to solve this kind of problem.

True, not to mention that the OP has shot down most suggestions.

My kids were raised with 14 first cousins which meant that once my parents and siblings were added, we had 20+ people gatherings. We always made sure that every adult couple had their own space. For DH and I and my siblings, it was a no go otherwise. The kids though slept here there and everywhere as they wanted one big slumber party. We usually had a boy room, a girl room, and then littles would bunk in with their parents. That being said, the longest we ever shared a crowded house was maybe a 6 night ski trip. On that trip we had side by side condos. My parents and the 5 adult couples each had one of the 3 bedrooms in each. The 3 preteen and teen boys had the basement of one condo and the 4 teen girls had the basement of the other. Each basement had bunk beds for 4 so they all had a bed. One college kid had the sofa bed in one living room and the 3 littles had the sofa bed and loveseat of the other.

Without knowing the OP’s group size and ages, it’s difficult to say what I’d do in her exact situation.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Thanks for the update OP.

I'd honestly say y'all have outgrown the prior arrangement. It doesn't sound like the issue is the families not wanting to be around each other but as you grow (not just kids) you may find yourself wanting something different. Free is tempting but free shouldn't be the be-it-all either especially as the years go on.

My husband and I shared hotel rooms with his parents, his siblings in our early stages of relationship even the first year or two of our marriage but we're 13 years together and 8 years of marriage and at some point dang it I just wanted some privacy, needed sleep (in-laws snore very badly), and just overall wanted to have different accommodations. So for the most part the only time you'll see us sharing space is several days at the Lake where we still have a separate bedroom. I basically put it as we paid our dues (as we did often get a break on the contribution we put in).

Perhaps your family has grown to the point where it may be time to do it more on your own and have an accommodation that gives more breathing space AND comfort for all considering you were already expressing concerns over bed size (and safety concerns too).

 

[rigs32]

I'm jealous of how well some of you sleep. I learned my lesson regarding sleeping arrangements. People who snore or who are just loud in general led to a couple trips where I was so sleep deprived I was miserable. I have turned down trips where the accommodations offered just wouldn't work for me.

 

[DLgal]

I'm jealous of how well some of you sleep. I learned my lesson regarding sleeping arrangements. People who snore or who are just loud in general led to a couple trips where I was so sleep deprived I was miserable. I have turned down trips where the accommodations offered just wouldn't work for me.

Same. I have the absolute worst time falling asleep away from home and am normally a light sleeper anyway, so I would absolutely NOT share a room with that many people. After 2 nights of poor quality sleep on vacation, I just want to cry and go home.

 

[QueenIsabella]

I wonder if the OP will come to the same realization that this situation is difficult. It's been 2 years since she's been to the house. Her kids have grown a lot since then. I'm sure the kids and cousins are all super thrilled for the vacation, which means a lot. But I suspect it will be clear, once they're there, that this family has outgrown the current sleeping arrangements. Hopefully while she's there, the OP can scope out other possibilities for future trip--larger house, nearby condo, something. Her kids won't be getting smaller. Growing up, my kids always vacationed with their cousins, and it was a huge pat of childhood for them, so I hope the OP can find a workable solution for the longer term.

 

[crisi]

I wonder if the OP will come to the same realization that this situation is difficult. It's been 2 years since she's been to the house. Her kids have grown a lot since then. I'm sure the kids and cousins are all super thrilled for the vacation, which means a lot. But I suspect it will be clear, once they're there, that this family has outgrown the current sleeping arrangements. Hopefully while she's there, the OP can scope out other possibilities for future trip--larger house, nearby condo, something. Her kids won't be getting smaller. Growing up, my kids always vacationed with their cousins, and it was a huge pat of childhood for them, so I hope the OP can find a workable solution for the longer term.

When I was a kid we would spend the week of the 4th of July in a similar arrangement with Grandparents, cousins, aunts uncles. Usually it was good and memories to be treasured. But I do remember one year where my parents and us three kids ended up in a little tiny studio cabin - and were miserable all week. My sister was a toddler and up during the night. My father would come in late because the guys would play cribbage until after midnight, and wake everyone up - then he wanted to sleep in, but we were up with the crack of dawn to go run around with cousins. That was one of the last years we went - the family had gotten too big for the resort and other options were too expensive for everyone.

 

[aprilgail]

Honestly I can't imagine living like that for a weekend never mind a week or 2. I would be SO miserable having 3 kids in the room with me! If those were my only options I would either bring a minivan and sleep in it or rent an RV and sleep in that in the driveway. 5 people sleeping in one small bedroom is not my idea of a vacation at all.

 

[Princess Disney Mom]

Put your kids in one room with their cousins and the adults take the other room. It would still be tight for everyone but the kids would have a blast. And as others said you are outgrowing this house. It happens you will find a solution.

 

[scrapquitler]

During my childhood, when we did these types of vacations, all the kids brought sleeping bags and slept on the floor in the living room.
I'd plan the same for my kids. I'd tell them that if they didn't like the beds available, they could go out on the couch or sleep in a sleeping bag on the floor.
Most of the time when we traveled with our two kids, my son brought his sleeping bag and slept on the closet floor.

 

[SweetPeasMom2]

Is it possible to put kids in one or two rooms? Adults in others? Also, if some of the families will be leaving early, can you spread out into those rooms then?

 

[mi*vida*loca]

I was going to also say have all of the kids sleep in the living room with tents and sleeping bags. It's what my friends and I have done when we want to stay in one house and we can't find a big enough house. Now that the kids are older it doesn't work but when they were your kids ages it worked perfectly. It's actually what we used to do when the kids had sleepovers with multiple friends. The living room would be decked out with blankets and pillows and a fort and they would all sleep out there.

 

[DisneyCowgirl]

I would not put my family in that situation for two weeks. My DH probably would just say no way even for a few days. Get a hotel room nearby and adults and 6YO sleep there. If you can't make that work, honestly, I'd consider not going or only going for a few days.

 

[kathy884]

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I would not put my family in that situation for two weeks. My DH probably would just say no way even for a few days. Get a hotel room nearby and adults and 6YO sleep there. If you can't make that work, honestly, I'd consider not going or only going for a few days.

lol --That's my husband. He's not the bunk up type. To stay with extended family he insists we have our own enclosed bedroom/bath that we don't share with others. Even one day is NOT OK. He's OK if DS is in with us too, but no one outside our immediate family. I'm fine with that too. He's made it totally clear up front to everyone that he'd love to get together, but that this is what he needs to be comfortable and we have the budget/ability to get that if it's available (other's don't need to pay or up the budget to accommodate is). If not available, if it's all of us we don't go. We, for example, said no to a Lake Powell houseboat trip with the extended family, as this didn't meet his criteria for acceptable family togetherness. Also on this one we didn't even consider the expense or effort of another boat (just didn't make sense). DH and I stayed home, but my son ended up going and bunking up with cousins. Do note: I checked with my parents and my brother to make sure they were OK with this before giving DS the choice to join them on his own. In Orlando we have often booked our own condo at the resort that other extended family are staying to take care of DH's privacy wants.

Now if DH isn't going and it's just me and/or DS (25 now) staying with extended family on my side who we are really close to, we think nothing of bunking up with them or being in a common area on a cot or blowup and sharing a community bathroom. Neither of us would have any issue of doing that for a few days. I usually in a situation like that lol, I limit it to four nights for me. DS is younger than me and more adaptable and is fine with seven nights.

I think people are quite different in their privacy needs, and I respect that.

OP I totally get not wanting to be the prima donna or hurt anyone's feelings with a generous vacation offer for all getting together. I think it's a balancing act. It's also your call entirely on communication with generous relatives and family privacy needs/decisions.

My dad has been one who has been generous with family vacation rentals etc. (renting a family compound place, condo or house), and I've just been super up front with him about DH and how I don't want him to pay more for our privacy and be a prima donna, that we're in good shape financially, and he's been cool with our getting our own hotel room or condo near the family compound rental. Everyone else except us bunks up. My dad and I though have always been super close, have always been on the same wave length, have always talked about finances/money a lot (every since I was a kid -- just a personal interest for both of us), so it's a very easy topic for me with him with no hurt feeling whatsoever. I can see that it might not be so easy or something you'd even want to bring up with others (again for family bliss and harmony and not wanting to make waves or hurt anyone's feelings).

Hope your trip goes great OP with great family times and memories..

 

[LovesTimone]

So while I did not read through everything.

14 Days non stop with family... that's 336 hours .... NOPE.... So 5 of you in one room plus you will have stuff for 5, where is it all going to go, you will be on top of each other... someone is bound to have a melt down.... or two.... or three... etc.... etc...ditto... It probably worked out okay when the kids were younger, as they get older they need space and privacy... Adult must have some space and privacy.

No way in God's green earth could I do this... It's suppose to be a vacation, which I can not see how you will be able to relax at all, crammed all together like this... NOPE...

There is such a thing as to much togetherness when it comes to family... Maybe I think differently... It took all that I could do to get through an afternoon Thanksgiving day lunch with my brother and his family in the past. I shutter to think what is would be like to have to be stuck being in the same house with his family for 14 days... My brother and I talk and it only has to do with our parents, and that's it... I have no ill will for him or them, I just will not subject my family or myself to all the nonsense that they drag around any more.

Honestly, I would not even think of going this route... I would just find a place for my family, and go from there. Just explain to your Dad that your family has outgrown the space which is as simple as it gets, and this is why you are renting your own space. You still can over to the house and hang out. Then when you had enough you could go back and relax and step away from all the family time.

 

[MKCP5]

But this is not what the OP asked. She asked for help...this is not helpful with everyone saying how miserable they would be.

No kidding! OP I don't have any great ideas, but I see you want to spend time with your family and I hope you can find a way to make it all work out and have a wonderful time! <3