@Disney2013Girl, I will address a couple of hints for the wheelchair at the end of this post. First, I wanted to talk about your Grandma's Dementia.
My mom had stroke-related Dementia, so this is a topic that is really personal to me. We took her to WDW relatively "early" in her decline, and what I found was that she had been "covering" just how bad off she really was. As long as she stayed at home, in an area where she was well-known and comfortable, she could get along pretty well; no one but us (and her doctors) knew. But when we traveled, it became very obvious, very fast how stressful that was for her, and how far advanced her Dementia was. As a result, we did wind up doing some things differently on that visit to WDW, and we still had an amazing time.
In fact, it is where I took my most favorite ever picture of her. When we visit WDW now, I always stand on that spot, and send her a balloon. (Just last month, in fact!) We lost Mom in 2011, but I was fortunate and honored to be her caregiver for the last 4+ years of her life.
There are many kinds of Dementia; and while they all have much in common, they also can have quirks that are very specific to the *type* of Dementia that you are working with in regards to your Grandma. So you might want to consider taking some time to learn a bit more about her specific kind of Dementia - and a great spot for Dementia caregivers and loved ones is the Message Boards over at
ALZ.org. You don't have join unless you want to post; I found it to be a tremendously caring and knowledgable community, and I believe my participation there strongly contributed to helping increase my Mom's quality of life during her last years.
OK. :::Taking a deep breath::: Being prepared is the only way I got through everything, so I think it's awesome that you are planning ahead. Just based on experience, here are the things I would be thinking about/preparing for regarding both the trip itself, and actual park day(s):
- Meds; knowing what each one is, doseage, and schedule
- Foods; knowing what she will and won't eat, and what favorite snacks are (often needed to coax behaviors) Is she fully independent when eating, or does she require some assistance or oversight?
- Clothing; many Dementia patients have clothing issues (itchy clothes, spontaneous undressing, etc.) Creating an outfit for each day, complete with undergarments and shoes can help her stay focused when dressing.
- Comfort items; for example, my Mom always loved to have her crossword puzzle book and pencil with her, even when she was no longer able to complete a puzzle, she would carry them around with her, along with her purse. (always the purse. The purse went EVERYWHERE LOL)
- Sensory abilities; for example, will it be sensory overload just to sit *next* to a ride, like the Teacups, that spin, and have not only lots of motion, but potentially lots of sound? What can be done to mitigate any sensory issues? Can she tolerate noise and crowds for long periods of time, or will she need periodic "respite" in the room?
- Cognitive abilities; can she self-identify? If she does happen to wander away, would she be able to tell a Cast Member who she was, and who you are?
- Physical abilities; what does she need in the way of accommodations for the trip? Will you need a roll-in shower? Can she bathe and/or toilet herself, or will she need assistance?
There's more, much more to consider - this is just off the top of my head.
I know that right now many of these things may seem far from your mind, but please remember that our loved ones with Dementia can (and do) often "hide" how much they have declined very well - often so much so that it can be a shock when you finally realize it. Being prepared makes the entire journey - not just to and from WDW, but literally for the rest of her life - much easier.
And yes, to those who have read this far, in many ways our loved ones who have been diagnosed with Dementia can often benefit from many of the same techniques that are helpful to kids with Autism.
About the wheelchair - just a couple of tips to help out. First, make sure you take along bike gloves (or similar) for any member of your party who will pushing her in the chair. Rental chairs tend to be heavy and bulky to begin with, and it doesn't take long before those hard hand grips make blisters. You will be surprised at how many ramps, inclines and hills there are at WDW! If she is sensitive to the sun, make sure the rental company can accommodate that with an umbrella that can be clamped on, and folded down or removed for transport. Resist the temptation to hang purses, diaper bags, shopping bags, etc. off the handles of the wheelchair - it just adds to the weight, and can cause a potential tipping issue if/when Grandma transfers out of the chair (to eat, to toilet, etc.) If she will be sitting all day - and not getting out of the chair to ride any rides, or to move to a chair to eat - then I would either also rent a gel cushion for the seat, or plan on padding the seat with towels from the hotel. Encourage her to stand every hour, if for no other reason than to straighten up and "fluff" the seat pad, and prevent serious stiffness issues.
I don't quite know what to tell you about the rider-swap issue. In a perfect world, if I were you, I would take along a companion for her; someone that would be glad to sit with her while you and your family rode the rides, and would be able to help you with any care issues. I know that is most likely not possible - adding another person (and their accommodations, travel expenses, meals, park tickets, etc.) could be quite costly. Aside from that, if you can afford it, you might consider one of the VIP Tour Services? Hang in there - between now and October, we will surely figure this out!
And don't forget to ask over at ALZ.org in the Message Boards there - you may find just the answer you need there!
Disney2013Girl, I hope you know that I am NOT trying to discourage you from taking your dear Grandma with you - far from it! By being prepared, I hope you, and your son, and your entire family have a wonderful, Magical trip!
(((hugs))) Mamabunny
