I have no problem using the family money to buy our family things that we need. If it comes to gift-giving, I have no problem buying our dd gifts with the money that my husband earns at work. When it comes to giving gifts to my DH, I have a hard time. He's a much bigger tightwad than me, and says that he would prefer no gifts. I feel guilty not getting him anything, so I have to rule that out, but I also feel guilty for spending money on him that he actually earned (even though we agree that raising our daughter counts and that he only earns half of his salary and I earn the other half) when he doesn't want me to spend it on him. I know that he fully considers all the money that he gets from his check "our money", but I have a hard time spending it on him.