Sad about husband's clearest memory of our recent trip.

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Wow, talk about a "holier than thou" additude......

Yeah....That's really not though.

 

[Goofyluver]

Wow, talk about a "holier than thou" additude......

I guess anyone would be LUCKY to be publically embarassed by you, or the PP??

Minky said she tried to suggest that her friend leave the table.

If you aren't smart enough to get the hint, then yes, you deserve a little public embarrassment.

You do realize we're talking about a person changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table, right? And not an ugly pair of earings or a dress you don't like?

Who is selfish and self-absorbed enough to actually believe that changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table is appropriate?

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Minky said she tried to suggest that her friend leave the table.

If you aren't smart enough to get the hint, then yes, you deserve a little public embarrassment.

You do realize we're talking about a person changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table, right? And not an ugly pair of earings or a dress you don't like?

Who is selfish and self-absorbed enough to actually believe that changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table is appropriate?

Exactly...

 

[Buckalew11]

I wouldn't want to be friends with someone who sees something they don't like, and to get their way, would loudly embarass me in public. Seems rather childish if you ask me.



Having said that, of course its nasty as all heck to change your kids diaper at a dining table. But if this is your BEST FRIEND FOREVER, you #1 know the type of person she is, and know that they would do something like this, and #2, you let certain things slide because they are your BEST FRIEND FOREVER. And by slide, I mean you don't embarass them infront of a room full of people.

I totally disagree with you. I do not think you ever just "let certain things slide" when it comes to things like changing diapers at a table. Why on earth would someone do this? Why would someone let it slide? If Minky said something quietly and was ignored, then had to speak up and be firm about the issue, well, then, the friend was probably embarrassed that she did not use common sense and know to do this already herself. In my book, the FRIEND was choosing to end the friendship--because she could not get over herself.

And perhaps the friendship wasn't what it had been in the past (since they were BFF) and this may have not been the first *strange* thing the BFF had done like this so...maybe it was time. Only Minky knows how this friendship was.

 

[minkydog]

So.... you ruined your friendship with your "BFF", because you felt the need to "embarrassed her half to death"..... In public?? Are you proud of this???


I'm sure shes OK with the fact that your no longer "BFFs" after that.....

No *I* didn't ruin the friendship. I did not try to embarrass my friend--she was doing a fine job all on her own. People around us were shooting dirty looks and complaining. I was afraid we were going to get thrown out of the restaurant so I raised my voice. I didn't yell, I. simply got firm with my friend. She didn't see it my way and chose to put our friendship on the back burner. She truly did not see the problem with changing a poopy diaper right there in the restaurant.

 

[DisneySarah80]

Minky said she tried to suggest that her friend leave the table.

If you aren't smart enough to get the hint, then yes, you deserve a little public embarrassment.

You do realize we're talking about a person changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table, right? And not an ugly pair of earings or a dress you don't like?

Who is selfish and self-absorbed enough to actually believe that changing a dirty diaper at a restaurant table is appropriate?

I'm in no way debating that its an OK thing to do - Its disgusting! All I'm saying, is she said they were BFFs - Not just friends, not acquaintances, but best friends. I think thats a nasty thing to do to your "BFF" - You could argue that the BFF was doing a nasty thing as well, and you'd be correct, however, it wasn't malicious, i.e. ment to hurt someone, like the PPs actions were. I personally, wouldn't want to be "BFFs" with someone who would do that to me. JMHO


ETA - Nor would I feel that I had to right to embarass someone in public because she was doing something that I didn't like. Unless she was physically harming the child, I don't see what she gained from it.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

I'm in no way debating that its an OK thing to do - Its disgusting! All I'm saying, is she said they were BFFs - Not just friends, not acquaintances, but best friends. I think thats a nasty thing to do to your "BFF" - You could argue that the BFF was doing a nasty thing as well, and you'd be correct, however, it wasn't malicious, i.e. ment to hurt someone, like the PPs actions were. I personally, wouldn't want to be "BFFs" with someone who would do that to me. JMHO


ETA - Nor would I feel that I had to right to embarass someone in public because she was doing something that I didn't like. Unless she was physically harming the child, I don't see what she gained from it.

I don't think Minky was being malicious though. She didn't see her friend about to change the baby, smirk and think..."This is going to be great! Lets see how bad I can hurt her feelings by embarrassing her!" THAT would be malicious!

 

[Goofyluver]

I'm in no way debating that its an OK thing to do - Its disgusting! All I'm saying, is she said they were BFFs - Not just friends, not acquaintances, but best friends. I think thats a nasty thing to do to your "BFF" - You could argue that the BFF was doing a nasty thing as well, and you'd be correct, however, it wasn't malicious, i.e. ment to hurt someone, like the PPs actions were. I personally, wouldn't want to be "BFFs" with someone who would do that to me. JMHO


ETA - Nor would I feel that I had to right to embarass someone in public because she was doing something that I didn't like. Unless she was physically harming the child, I don't see what she gained from it.

She didn't change the kid's nasty diaper at the table.

Score.

It's not nasty to call attention to disgusting and inappropriate behavior. It's nasty that Minky had to say anything at all. That's not "holier than thou". It's necessary.

 

[minkydog]

I'm in no way debating that its an OK thing to do - Its disgusting! All I'm saying, is she said they were BFFs - Not just friends, not acquaintances, but best friends. I think thats a nasty thing to do to your "BFF" - You could argue that the BFF was doing a nasty thing as well, and you'd be correct, however, it wasn't malicious, i.e. ment to hurt someone, like the PPs actions were. I personally, wouldn't want to be "BFFs" with someone who would do that to me. JMHO


ETA - Nor would I feel that I had to right to embarass someone in public because she was doing something that I didn't like. Unless she was physically harming the child, I don't see what she gained from it.

We shall just have to agree to disagree. When it comes to a public health hazard I think I am within my rights to speak up. If that embarrasses my friend, well so be it. She embarrassed me pretty badly when she yanked down that chocolate diaper right there next to me.

 

[EclecticWAHM]

I'm in no way debating that its an OK thing to do - Its disgusting! All I'm saying, is she said they were BFFs - Not just friends, not acquaintances, but best friends. I think thats a nasty thing to do to your "BFF" - You could argue that the BFF was doing a nasty thing as well, and you'd be correct, however, it wasn't malicious, i.e. ment to hurt someone, like the PPs actions were. I personally, wouldn't want to be "BFFs" with someone who would do that to me. JMHO


ETA - Nor would I feel that I had to right to embarass someone in public because she was doing something that I didn't like. Unless she was physically harming the child, I don't see what she gained from it.

Telling your BFF that you can't change a baby on a restaurant table is NOT a nasty thing to do to anyone. Seriously, anyone who thinks that is really immature when it comes to relationships. Telling someone to take their baby somewhere appropriate to change a poopy diaper is not inappropriate or "doing something to someone." If the BFF was embarrassed by it, GOOD...they learned something, but it's not like the person TRIED to embarrass them. They did the right thing by insisting they go somewhere else to change the baby. I'm floored that anyone would feel any different about that. How is that "doing that to her"?? Doing WHAT to her? She did nothing wrong. The fact that this person was too immature to see that changing a baby on a restaurant table is not appropriate is what's wrong here, not the friend's insistence on her moving elsewhere.

 

[DisneySarah80]

We shall just have to agree to disagree. When it comes to a public health hazard I think I am within my rights to speak up. If that embarrasses my friend, well so be it. She embarrassed me pretty badly when she yanked down that chocolate diaper right there next to me.

If your only concern was a "public health hazard" you could have quietly told management what happened as you left - Everyone would have left happy, and the friendship would still be intact. You could have then told her how upsetting, and down right embarrassing it was that she did that, and told her never to do it ever again. No one else was going to be sitting in that seat till you guys left - That would have given the restaurant plenty of time to clean it up with the propper chemicals. Though gross, your friend is not the first person to ever change a babys diaper in public, and I'm sure they know exactly how to handle it.

You just wrote "She embarrassed me pretty badly when she yanked down that chocolate diaper right there next to me." With that comment, it makes me think that this was your way of embarrassing her back.

 

[DisneySarah80]

Telling your BFF that you can't change a baby on a restaurant table is NOT a nasty thing to do to anyone. Seriously, anyone who thinks that is really immature when it comes to relationships. Telling someone to take their baby somewhere appropriate to change a poopy diaper is not inappropriate or "doing something to someone." If the BFF was embarrassed by it, GOOD...they learned something, but it's not like the person TRIED to embarrass them. They did the right thing by insisting they go somewhere else to change the baby. I'm floored that anyone would feel any different about that. How is that "doing that to her"?? Doing WHAT to her? She did nothing wrong. The fact that this person was too immature to see that changing a baby on a restaurant table is not appropriate is what's wrong here, not the friend's insistence on her moving elsewhere.

No where did I read that the friend attempted to do the changing on the TABLE. I assumed it was either on her own lap, or on the booth / seat. Even I would probably be throwing up if someone attempted to change a diaper on a table!!!!


ETA - And even then, I would have quietly gotten up, put my money down on the table, said my Goodbyes, and just left. I still couldn't embarrass someone.... Just me I guess....

 

[T*Bird]

Telling your BFF that you can't change a baby on a restaurant table is NOT a nasty thing to do to anyone. Seriously, anyone who thinks that is really immature when it comes to relationships. Telling someone to take their baby somewhere appropriate to change a poopy diaper is not inappropriate or "doing something to someone." If the BFF was embarrassed by it, GOOD...they learned something, but it's not like the person TRIED to embarrass them. They did the right thing by insisting they go somewhere else to change the baby. I'm floored that anyone would feel any different about that. How is that "doing that to her"?? Doing WHAT to her? She did nothing wrong. The fact that this person was too immature to see that changing a baby on a restaurant table is not appropriate is what's wrong here, not the friend's insistence on her moving elsewhere.

THIS.

I'm not even 100% sure I believe the criticism of how minkydog handled the diaper situation is real, and not just an attempt at Because for the life of me, I can't see how anyone would think minkydog was in the wrong!

 

[EclecticWAHM]

No where did I read that the friend attempted to do the changing on the TABLE. I assumed it was either on her own lap, or on the booth / seat. Even I would probably be throwing up if someone attempted to change a diaper on a table!!!!


ETA - And even then, I would have quietly gotten up, put my money down on the table, said my Goodbyes, and just left. I still couldn't embarrass someone.... Just me I guess....

The point that you fail to get is that Minky did not embarrass anyone. That person did a fine job of embarrassing herself. I would stop ANYONE from attempting to change a child's diaper in the middle of a restaurant. Best friend, acquaintance, my own mother...doesn't matter who it is. Telling someone they need to go somewhere else is NOT a rude thing to do and it's not done to embarrass them. It's done to KEEP them from embarrassing THEMSELVES. I'm absolutely amazed that you don't get that.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

THIS.

I'm not even 100% sure I believe the criticism of how the OP handled the situation is real, and not just an attempt at Because for the life of me, I don't see any scenario where the OP was in the wrong!

The poster you are referring to is a long time poster and generally doesn't "stir the pot".

I can absolutely see where someone would think it wasn't a big deal. people do things like that everyday and see no problem with it...That...Or they just don't care.

 

[fortwildernessishome]

Telling your BFF that you can't change a baby on a restaurant table is NOT a nasty thing to do to anyone. Seriously, anyone who thinks that is really immature when it comes to relationships. Telling someone to take their baby somewhere appropriate to change a poopy diaper is not inappropriate or "doing something to someone." If the BFF was embarrassed by it, GOOD...they learned something, but it's not like the person TRIED to embarrass them. They did the right thing by insisting they go somewhere else to change the baby. I'm floored that anyone would feel any different about that. How is that "doing that to her"?? Doing WHAT to her? She did nothing wrong. The fact that this person was too immature to see that changing a baby on a restaurant table is not appropriate is what's wrong here, not the friend's insistence on her moving elsewhere.

Totally agree!!!!

 

[EclecticWAHM]

THIS.

I'm not even 100% sure I believe the criticism of how the OP handled the situation is real, and not just an attempt at Because for the life of me, I don't see any scenario where the OP was in the wrong!

Seriously. When people don't take the subtle hints, some situations call for hitting them over the head with the "clue" brick, yanno? If they become embarrassed, it's their own fault for being so self-absorbed and dense.

 

[fortwildernessishome]

The point that you fail to get is that Minky did not embarrass anyone. That person did a fine job of embarrassing herself. I would stop ANYONE from attempting to change a child's diaper in the middle of a restaurant. Best friend, acquaintance, my own mother...doesn't matter who it is. Telling someone they need to go somewhere else is NOT a rude thing to do and it's not done to embarrass them. It's done to KEEP them from embarrassing THEMSELVES. I'm absolutely amazed that you don't get that.

Totally agree with you again!!! I am amazed as well that the poster doesnt get it!

 

[YodaGirl]

Blech! I had a friend who attempted to change her baby's nasty #2 diaper in a restaurant, right at our table! Not only did *I* not want to see that, I'm pretty sure the rest of the lunch crowd was grossed out. I tried to discourage her gently, but she wasn't getting it. I finally had to get firm, even raised my voice and INSISTED "You can't change the baby in here where people are eating!" She took the baby to the restroom but only because I had embarrassed her half to death. We stopped being BFFs after that because she felt that I had overreacted--her baby's poop wasn't all THAT bad. It was just baby poop, after all.

Some people never get it.

The point that you fail to get is that Minky did not embarrass anyone. That person did a fine job of embarrassing herself. I would stop ANYONE from attempting to change a child's diaper in the middle of a restaurant. Best friend, acquaintance, my own mother...doesn't matter who it is. Telling someone they need to go somewhere else is NOT a rude thing to do and it's not done to embarrass them. It's done to KEEP them from embarrassing THEMSELVES. I'm absolutely amazed that you don't get that.

Right or wrong, I thought that Minky meant that she embarrassed her friend.

(I don't see where it says she embarrassed or friend intentionally, or not, though)

 

[Goofyluver]

Seriously. When people don't take the subtle hints, some situations call for hitting them over the head with the "clue" brick, yanno? If they become embarrassed, it's their own fault for being so self-absorbed and dense.

"Clue brick"...