Re: Cancelling FINAL UPDATE/close request

[Disney_traveler]

i have no idea where this would go, feel free to move to a different forum if needed.

We (mom and I) are 2 weeks out from trip. Southwest flights on points. MYW package + dining + airport transfer fully paid, ADRs made, MBs received, etc.

Grandma (dads mom) has had stage 4 cancer for 4 years. In December things got worse. In may they said it was time to send her home on hospice, call family members and say goodbyes. Then she started to get better. Then today aunt said it's the beginning of the end (which she said in both December and May)

Asked dad what do we do, and he said keep trip as planned and wait and see.

So what do I do if I have to cancel before I leave?
What do I do if I'm there and we have to come home?

I did buy trip insurance through Disney. I always do.

Help. I've never been through something like this.

I understand many here despise me or have me on ignore because of my outspoken-ness on my points of view, but any advice would be appreciated.

 

[Duffjk]

December 2015 my dad passed away about a week and a half away from our annual holiday trip. Even though we go 4 or 5 times per year we made the trip. Granted it was after the funeral. I just feel those that have passed would want us to enjoy life. Regardless of where we think they end up. Your views and mine and everyone else's will differ on that subject. I can't imagines that someone who loved me such as a parent or grandparent would want me to stop life for their death. Funeral arrangements often get stretched out for two weeks now. If the worst scenario happens, celebrate their life and your happiness as they would want. Then mourn in your own way as needed. They would wish your happiness through the love you share. Good thoughts. Hope you all make it. Sorry so long and unedited.

 

[Duffjk]

This in no way answers your questions other than I would go no matter what and celebrate life. Hope that makes sense.

 

[maltdizzy]

Take the trip.

The best plan is not to put your life on hold for "maybe," even in cases of grief. There is little you can do and if your father says it's okay, trust he's being truthful. This isn't meant to be callous, but with age comes acceptance of the inevitable and, while painful, he had time to brace himself for it. No pun intented, but there really is a circle if life.

If your grandmother does pass right before the trip, see about the insurance options and be there for your father. If she passes during the trip, he is a phone call away, and chances are any funeral arrangements will be after your scheduled return.

I actually missed seeing 3 of my grandparents by a day before they passed (in one case, by hours), it stung. But, by then, I was used to each time I said goodbye possibly being the last. You have my empathy.

 

[MamaBelle4]

No advice, don't know what I would do.

I just want to say I'm sorry you're going through this difficult time.

 

[Disney_traveler]

Thank you @Duffjk and @maltdizzy
Those are exactly how I feel. Her cancer has caused several mini strokes since December. In April she still spoke some but it was obvious she didn't recognize anyone. I went to hug her and she flinched away. In my head and heart, I said goodbye then. It hurt me that this woman (to me) wasn't my grandma.

My mother father and I still take family vacations together and we had the same situation in early June. We all still went then. The only parts that bother me are leaving my father to go through something. And (which I know this is stupid) living in a small town.

 

[DisneyWishes14]

I agree with your Dad. Keep the trip as planned. If something happens prior to the trip and you can't go, try to reschedule (to avoid cancellation penalties) or cancel and file the insurance claim. If something happens during the trip and you need to cut it short, again, file a claim. You were smart to buy insurance.

This same thing happened with my mom who was in hospice care for over a year. We ended up canceling a vacation because we were told her death was imminent . . . and then, thankfully, she lived another 11 months. I certainly don't regret cancelling the vacation, but it just goes to show you never really know what's going to happen and you should go but be prepared to change plans on a dime if need be.

 

[Jadyreen1282]

Don't cancel but be prepared to cut it short if you need to. You will know the closer you get to the vacation what your actual instincts are on her passing date. They can always delay the funeral till you get back.

I understand many here despise me or have me on ignore because of my outspoken-ness on my points of view, but any advice would be appreciated.

All opinions and views are welcome by me.

 

[Disney_traveler]

Thanks all. I really appreciate all the points of view and info. We (mom and I) just had a bit of an argument about. I thought I was doing a good thing finding out this info. Then it turned into me "harping" about stuff, getting my hormones in check( I have medical issues with crazy hormones) blah blah. Anyways, I am going 100%, no matter what, don't care what people say/think. According to mom she is going too, but I just question that if it comes down to it.

 

[bumbershoot]

You bought the insurance, so if things happen and you want to cancel or go home early, call the insurance people. They'll tell you what to do. (I do want to mention that you would need to have made sure the pre existing condition clause isn't there, and that you're covered for problems with people at home)

I understand many here despise me or have me on ignore because of my outspoken-ness on my points of view, but any advice would be appreciated.

I know the feeling, but people help when help is needed.

 

[dprincessmom]

This is never an easy thing. I had to miss my own grandmother's funeral because at the time my husband was have cancer treatments and at that point there was nothing I wouldn't have tried to keep him here. Sadly DH passed away shortly in December. We were told to register with hospice for the "pre-need" offerings. We were registered for exactly 10 days before his passing. The night that he died, we had gotten him settled and the day nurse left saying see you in the morning. Even the nurses were surprised at how quickly it happened. So as others have stated, no one knows for certain when the time will come.

Here's hoping that you go on the trip and no matter what happens you find things to enjoy.

 

[mickeyluv'r]

I'm sorry for your family.

A few thoughts on trip details....when making a choice like this, I find it helpful to know the terms of all my bookings.

Typically with SWA, you can't get your money back, but cancelling before the flight takes off = a travel voucher good for one year.

With WDW, read and know the terms of your booking, because they are a bit complicated.

Depending whether you have a package or room only booking- you also get some flexibility to change your dates. You may not get the same discount as before, but you can often put what you paid toward a different date. If you book room only, you can actually get a full refund if you cancel at least 5 days in advance.

Packages are slightly less flexible, but cancel 30+days= full refund. Cancel less than 30, but more than 2 days advance=$200 fee (and I think they still let you put that $200 towards another date.) Less than 1 day= no refund (don't know about modifications at that point) These days park tickets are non-refundable and expire, BUT - you can STILL generally convert your tickets into AP's, and in-used tickets don't expire for a while.

No matter what, ALWAYS take the time to read your cancelation terms. You may find that you only need to use the trip insurance if you have to cancel very last minute or mid-trip, and that postponing it is easy.

In your shoes, I'd keep re-evaluating the situation day by day, and I'd let WDW know your situation in advance. I can't say what the right course of action will be, but knowing the cancelation and policy terms will help you make an informed choice should the need arise.

 

[prettypatchesmsu]

I am so sorry to hear this, and my thoughts and best wishes are with you and your family. I have experienced a similar situation with my sister-in-law when she was sick with cancer. We had a trip planned that year and thankfully she did better than they said and lived for a year longer than they had estimated. I am thankful we had that extra time. However, I understand the problems with planning and what ifs. My mother often tells me that you cannot put your life on hold and just have to live your life. I know it's hard.

I just wanted to reassure you about Disney's travel insurance. We always get the insurance and thankfully we did last year as we finally had to use it. As our 14 day trip turned into a 17 day trip as we were trapped by Hurricane Matthew when it hit on our flight out day. So we got extra days in Disney, but it was super stressful. What wasn't stressful though was dealing with the travel insurance claim. It was very easy, had no problems after we were home filing it. Very easy and quick check payment. Just keep up with your documents(emails etc) about your deposit payment, your final trip payment, and any receipts for expenses. It was very easy, so I wouldn't be worried about that if that is a concern of yours on how all that works.

 

[Disney_traveler]

Thank you to everyone in this threads for your input, info, kind thoughts, well-wishes, etc. it means so much to me to be able to vent about something I've never experienced and have no frame of reference for. We sat down tonight and discussed everything and feelings and emotions and what not. We ARE going on the trip. No matter what happens we are carrying on with the trip as planned. Dad said he will be fine, Gma would understand and don't worry if anyone, family or not, says otherwise. I was just all in a tizzy because I had no idea of I should be cancelling stuff or packing or what. The unknowns like that drive me crazy.

Again thank you all!

Now, on a lighter note, does anyone know if DiVine still makes appearances at AK?

 

[Disney_traveler]

Good morning all.

Just an update for anyone that's interested. My grandma passed away early this morning.

 

[hiroMYhero]

Hugs to you, @Disney_traveler at this most difficult time.

 

[marcyleecorgan]

*many hugs for you and your family*

 

[fely1st]

So sorry for you and your family.

 

[Lynne G]

Hugs. With sympathy and may you and the family find peace.

 

[lanejudy]

so sorry for your loss.