Parents of special needs kiddos: it's ok to go with their flow...

[luv2sleep]

My son has some severe special needs and gets extremely sensory overstimulated and anxious easily. He is not an easy going child. Many things can set off a major tantrum like lack of sleep, hunger, loud noises, etc. I've read so much about "you MUST get up early" etc. We are from CA. There was no way I was getting up 3 hrs early to hit the parks. I was a little concerned about not getting there at rope drop, etc. but now I know for sure that that's not important. Even with letting him get his proper amount of sleep and hitting the park late (1pm) he still had a major meltdown from the excitement. And all we did was go to a water park. We didn't even wsit in any lines. We were thetr 5 hours and that was enough. Tomorrow we hit MK. I am again letting him sleep in and am going to do my best to help him have a good time. He's definitely having fun. So glad that going with his flow vs having him on a schedule because today's meltdown would have been way worse. So parents of kids who have special needs, don't be afraid to just take it easy and go at your kid's pace. Also don't feel pressured to get on east coast time If you are from a diffetent time zome. The most important things for these kids are sleep and food. The rest can wait.

 

[tlpbupu]

I agree. You know your child best and what works for your family. We are a RD family but we are only coming for the Central Time Zone and my dd (Aspergers/ ADHD) is an early riser anyway. There is no way I could see doing RD coming from Cali.! Like your son being tired and hungry are my dd's main triggers. When she's done she's done. We tend to tour at a more leiserly pace without many, if any ADR's. It's what works for us. WDW is no fun for anyone if they are stressed.

I am so glad that your son is having a good time!
I hope you enjoy the rest of your vacation!

 

[lanejudy]

I think we've only done rope drop once ever, and we're already on the east coast so no time difference. But it's too much stress to get our family up and out of the room, fed and to the park that early. As PP said we also only have a couple of ADRs all week so we aren't tied to a schedule. We do try to stick to "normal" meal times and bedtime while on vacation, though. Do what works best for your family and enjoy your vacation!

 

[clanmcculloch]

My experience is different. You really have to know your child. For my DD, schedule is UNBELIEVABLY important. That being said, it's being on HER regular schedule that's important. She's an early to bed, early to rise kind of person and we're in the same time zone as FL so she wakes up in the morning in time to get ready for RD without an alarm or us having to wake her up so getting to the parks in time for RD is very easy for us. One of the biggest things I stress to parents of autistic kids is to stick to the child's at home schedule. In your case, that would mean NOT going to RD. For us, planning helps me to make sure we don't spend too much time in the parks and that we leave while she's still not overloaded yet. Yes, there is flexibility required and we'll scrap our plans if she's starting to show signs of not coping, but because of my detailed planning we don't push her to do "just one more thing" because she seems to be coping well. By doing this, we leave the parks on a high note and then the next day she's not struggling from having been overwhelmed the previous day. Our trips are SO much happier and relaxed now that I've learned this.

IMO it comes down to really knowing your child and knowing his/her needs and planning around those needs.

 

[luv2sleep]

Totally agree. When I said go with the flow I meant my som's flow and his personal schedule vs "the get up early, go to rope drop, have every table service and character interaction imaginable, and get on X number of tides before noon typo of commando Disney family" flow that's typically advised when you come to WDW. The advice was so overwhelming to even consider. I asked for water park advice here once and someone actually told me to not even bother going if I don't plan to get their when the park opens. That was crazy. To stick to my son's schedule that means getting up on his time and doing the parks in a leisurely fashion, not spending too much time there, and leaving when I can tell he's had enough.

 

[ttintagel]

I think this is advice that a lot of parents whose children DON'T have special needs could benefit from, too! I see so many parents in the parks running their kids ragged until it looks like nobody's having a good time.

 

[clanmcculloch]

Ah, so we're in 100% agreement then.

People ask me how we don't get bored going to the same place over and over again. Well, there's still so much we haven't done even just in the 4 main parks because we DO go at a leisurely pace and make sure we're not in the parks for too long plus take days off where we don't even leave our resort other than maybe an ADR at a nearby resort. It's just what we have to do but boy do we have a great time. We only just made it to Disney Quest this past February even though we've been to WDW so many times and we still haven't been to the water parks or mini golf or the Boardwalk area or so many other things. We've still got lots of new things to do. We also return from our WDW vacations rested and relaxed as opposed to the burned out that most families experience so following her schedule has actually been really good for all of us. It's a shame more families (including those without a special needs loved one) don't get to experience the laid back side of WDW where you really focus on enjoying your family. In a way, being forced to go at DD15's pace and on her schedule has been a blessing for the rest of us because we do have such a peaceful and happy time as a family at WDW.

 

[kathie859]

I think this is advice that a lot of parents whose children DON'T have special needs could benefit from, too! I see so many parents in the parks running their kids ragged until it looks like nobody's having a good time.

I so agree, ttinagel----And who hasn't seen a parent in the middle of a major breakdown screaming at a child for some perceived infraction at WDW? I've seen more bad behavior from adults than kids--I usually chalk it up to lack of preparation and altered sleep patterns.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Of course you should go at the schedule that works for a special needs child/adult. It's still possible in that case to get on the popular rides even arriving late because the GAC in many cases allows you through the fastpass line (without having to be there earlier to actually obtain a fastpass). If you don't have that GAC and arrive late, you will likely be locked out of fastpass and be on a very long standby line which is why rope drop arrival is a must do for so many.

 

[luv2sleep]

Of course you should go at the schedule that works for a special needs child/adult. It's still possible in that case to get on the popular rides even arriving late because the GAC in many cases allows you through the fastpass line (without having to be there earlier to actually obtain a fastpass). If you don't have that GAC and arrive late, you will likely be locked out of fastpass and be on a very long standby line which is why rope drop arrival is a must do for so many.

See I would just not stand in line. No way would I stand in a long line just to get on a ride. When we go to DL on crowded days we just do less popular rides. Neither one of us cares what we get on. We just want to have lower stress fun. If we leaved on the easy coast rope drop would be easy as my son normally wakes up at 6-6:30 365 days of the year no matter what.

 

[DisneyCowgirl]

I think this is advice that a lot of parents whose children DON'T have special needs could benefit from, too! I see so many parents in the parks running their kids ragged until it looks like nobody's having a good time.

This so true. The point of the vacation is to HAVE FUN. The point is not (or should not be) to ride absolutely every ride. If the only way we are going to get to ride Toy Story Mania is to get up super-early and rush like crazy, resulting in cranky kids for most of the day, then we don't ride Toy Story Mania.

 

[luv2sleep]

This so true. The point of the vacation is to HAVE FUN. The point is not (or should not be) to ride absolutely every ride. If the only way we are going to get to ride Toy Story Mania is to get up super-early and rush like crazy, resulting in cranky kids for most of the day, then we don't ride Toy Story Mania.

Yes this is us too. If we don't get in something we just don't get to. Not a big deal.

 

[AdaraRae]

This ALL just made me feel 100% better about taking my son on vacation.

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[KPeveler]

Especially because of the expense, a lot of people forget that Disney World/Disneyland/DCL are meant to be fun. The world will not end if you do not see every single attraction in every Park.

This is advice I give to adults traveling with disabilities, even if there are no kids involved. Luckily my family has been to WDW quite a few times before I require the use of wheelchair, but now our pace has to be slower. The last two times I tried to do Disney in the way I used to with my family I actually triggered narcoleptic sleep attacks where I would literally fall out of my wheelchair completely asleep. You would think I would learn after the first time, but no I did it again!

I know people want to get the most for their money, but I've always wondered how parents (whether their children have special needs are not) consider it "getting their money's worth" if their family is miserable or dead on their feet!

to the OP, you are absolutely right, and it's a lesson that many can learn from.

 

[minkydog]

I think this is advice that a lot of parents whose children DON'T have special needs could benefit from, too! I see so many parents in the parks running their kids ragged until it looks like nobody's having a good time.

Isn't that the truth! I feel sorry for those families. It like the parents have taken all this time off and spent thousands of dollars to be there and by golly, those ungrateful urchins better enjoy it, NOW!

I have two sons with special needs. We learned a long time ago that its better for all of us if we just relax and go with the flow.

 

[SDSorority]

My son has some severe special needs and gets extremely sensory overstimulated and anxious easily. He is not an easy going child. Many things can set off a major tantrum like lack of sleep, hunger, loud noises, etc. I've read so much about "you MUST get up early" etc. We are from CA. There was no way I was getting up 3 hrs early to hit the parks. I was a little concerned about not getting there at rope drop, etc. but now I know for sure that that's not important. Even with letting him get his proper amount of sleep and hitting the park late (1pm) he still had a major meltdown from the excitement. And all we did was go to a water park. We didn't even wsit in any lines. We were thetr 5 hours and that was enough. Tomorrow we hit MK. I am again letting him sleep in and am going to do my best to help him have a good time. He's definitely having fun. So glad that going with his flow vs having him on a schedule because today's meltdown would have been way worse. So parents of kids who have special needs, don't be afraid to just take it easy and go at your kid's pace. Also don't feel pressured to get on east coast time If you are from a diffetent time zome. The most important things for these kids are sleep and food. The rest can wait.

Same goes for adults! We have to tour around how we FEEL, because if we're forcing ourselves to go go go, we aren't going to have fun. Disney is all about having fun!

 

[Moodyzblu]

I think this is advice that a lot of parents whose children DON'T have special needs could benefit from, too! I see so many parents in the parks running their kids ragged until it looks like nobody's having a good time.

Totally agree ! The first bit of advice I give to Disney newbies is to slooooow down .. it's a vacation .. it's supposed to be fun !! I also tell them to shut the alarm off.
My son has lots of sensory issues as well and if I try to "push" him, especially if he is hot/tired, then we may as well go home because it all ends then and there !
We don't rope drop or make ADR's (maybe a couple) so that way we can relax in the morning and don't have to adhere to an ADR schedule.

 

[luv2sleep]

Totally agree ! The first bit of advice I give to Disney newbies is to slooooow down .. it's a vacation .. it's supposed to be fun !! I also tell them to shut the alarm off.
My son has lots of sensory issues as well and if I try to "push" him, especially if he is hot/tired, then we may as well go home because it all ends then and there !
We don't rope drop or make ADR's (maybe a couple) so that way we can relax in the morning and don't have to adhere to an ADR schedule.

So agree! I don't push my kid at home either. I have many family members who don't get that.

 

[kylmac]

We keep ADR's to a minimum so as not to go crazy ourselves! We don't mind counter service but will make an ADR during busy times of year.
Elizabeth