OT: Where does the baby pop out from?

[MommaSue]

We bought the book 'It's Not the Stork' by Robie Harris. It's a series of several book that are written by age group. The information in them are appropriate to what a child can understand and may be experiencing at their age.

My DS is 6 and looks at the books by himself quite often. He even answers DD8's questions before I have a chance to think of the answer myself.

 

[RMulieri]

I guess I am "modernized" . If my daughter ( who will be 6 asks) I tell her.My parents did not tell me ANYTHING, it was taboo.I never knew about getting a period ( till it happened) .I didn't find out about sex either....funnily enough my Mom tried to give me the "talk" at age 25.I hated not knowing and resorting to asking friends and trying to sneak books into the house.I don't want that for my daughter ever.

 

[indimom]

My mother didn't tell me anything and I don't want my kids to be ignorant or laughed at so when they ask questions, I answer to the best of my ability. Honestly, this is the easier question. I had to explain the birds and the bees to DS9 just a few months ago. Ugh! Thankfully, I'm done now, both kids have gotten the talk and I don't have to do it again! Yeah!

 

[kohlby]

I told both of my kids, using the correct words. I did say that they were cut out and showed them the scar, but that most babies came out through the vag*** My daughter did ask a random stranger when she was 2 if she has a uterus, so I understand them saying things you'd rather they didn't! My oldest knew all the details but one by 3 due to his questions. He only recently asked "but how does the daddy's sperm exactly get to the mommy's egg?" at 6 years old- so we, meaning I, had to explain that. Somehow DH manages to get out of these questions.

 

[CLR4321]

I would just be honest. My son asked me about 6 months ago where babies come out of, because he "knew they wouldn't fit out of a belly button". LOL! I didn't tell him the actual word for the place, but I did tell him that there is a special hole where babies come out of "down there". He then of course asked if babies came out when you use the bathroom, and I just told him there is a separate hole just for babies to come out. He basically said "ohhh!!!" and didn't ask anymore questions luckily.

 

[MariDisney]

My DD (now 10) was a c-section. I never taught her that that was the natural way. I told her the way that it's supposed to happen using the right body part terms. So, at 4, I would have told her that when the baby is ready to be born, the mom usually pushes her belly muscles really hard and the baby comes through her v out into the world. I also told her that some babies, like her, have trouble of some kind (and explained about her heart not beating right) so the doctor cuts a hole in the mommy and takes the baby out quickly.

 

[sunshinesahmom]

Oh how sweet 4 year olds are!

2 months ago I had my 9yo son ask how babies "get in there?"

 

[MImommy]

My DD (now 10) was a c-section. I never taught her that that was the natural way. I told her the way that it's supposed to happen using the right body part terms. So, at 4, I would have told her that when the baby is ready to be born, the mom usually pushes her belly muscles really hard and the baby comes through her v out into the world. I also told her that some babies, like her, have trouble of some kind (and explained about her heart not beating right) so the doctor cuts a hole in the mommy and takes the baby out quickly.

I am loving all of these stories and am glad that I am not the only one. My sister-in-law was thrilled that I had an emergency c-section. She wanted to be honest with her 4 year old who had lots of questions about how her cousin came in to the world but did not want to give all the facts yet. She called us at the hopital and told us "thanks!" She thought it was great to be able to honestly say that the doctor took him out of her Auntie's belly! I guess it is a good thing that number 2 will not be a VBAC.

 

[nmmom95]

Both my little ones were born via c section. Ages 6 and 8. So far, the only thing they've asked me is how they got out of my belly.

I told them the doctor cut a little hole in my belly and took them out. So I told them the truth.

One day, I'm sure they'll learn the natural way, but for now, that's an easy answer for me.

They've only casually asked me how they got in my belly, to which I replied "God put you there" and that was the end of it. If they pushed it and asked how, then I guess I'll need a book, but for now, they were happy with that answer, and at these ages, I'm content with it.

Me, too! I'll take the easy way any day!

 

[LisaNJ25]

When MY kid asked how SHE "came out of my tummy" I simply told her that the doctor game me some medicine, cut my tummy open, and then pulled her out. Technically I wasn't lying-- she was a C-section baby!!

Cha-ching! I got off easy on that one! Lol.
.

lol same here with 3 c-sections

 

[RMulieri]

Nobody WANTS to have "the talk" with their kids.But it is better to have them informed than getting the wrong info, or no info.If it makes you uncomfortable they sell books for ALL age groups, pick one up as a resource or conversation starter.Obviously for the older child/pre-teen......Just because they have the info does not mean they will be more inclined to have sex early.

 

[DrRae2B]

Just because they have the info does not mean they will be more inclined to have sex early.

That's very true-- it's actually the OPPOSITE. Kids are far less likely to have sex at a young age, if they have a clear understanding of the subject and trust that they can come to their parents with questions.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Nobody WANTS to have "the talk" with their kids.But it is better to have them informed than getting the wrong info, or no info.If it makes you uncomfortable they sell books for ALL age groups, pick one up as a resource or conversation starter.Obviously for the older child/pre-teen......Just because they have the info does not mean they will be more inclined to have sex early.

To each their own. I personally don't think a 4 year old needs that kind of information. It has nothing to do with a comfort level for me, I just don't think it is something small children need to know the specifics of. YMMV.

 

[RMulieri]

To each their own. I personally don't think a 4 year old needs that kind of information. It has nothing to do with a comfort level for me, I just don't think it is something small children need to know the specifics of. YMMV.

We will have to agree to disagree.I think info tailored to age specifics is perfectly fine.

 

[DrRae2B]

To each their own. I personally don't think a 4 year old needs that kind of information. It has nothing to do with a comfort level for me, I just don't think it is something small children need to know the specifics of. YMMV.

I agree-- I don't think a 4 yr old needs specifics at ALL. However, they do need "watered-down", age appropriate explanations, that can be added to and elaborated upon as they grow and mature. In many states, schools only teach about the biological basics of reproduction and avoid the subject of safe sexual practices altogether, which, IMHO would be fine except that some PARENTS unfortunately avoid the subject as well. Then we have kids like my SIL who ask questions but get the answer "We'll tell you when you're 18."

My daughter has no idea which hole a baby comes out from--- she's so big-mouthed she would likely announce that information to every human being she encounters from here till Christmas. She thinks ALL mommies have surgeries to get their babies out! And when she asked how it got there, I simply said that sometimes a man and a woman love each other sooo much that God gives them a baby to love so they don't love each other to death (and yes, my spur-of-the-moment answer satisfied her! At this point, she still believes in magic, and as far as she's concerned, that's exactly how a baby is made!). However, in the event that she asks me specific questions in the future (say, when she's 7, maybe? Hopefully older??), I will absolutely answer her questions with an age-appropriate explanation. I want her to come to ME with the questions--- I want the lines of communication wide open, so that she know that she can come to me for help someday if/when she needs it.

But, yeah, this is a very personal issue, and one that each parent should handle to their own degree of comfort, and with great care.

 

[~Kristina~]

I'm not politically correct when it comes to this stuff. LOL But when I was expecting #4 we were planning out first homebirth. I told my kids 5 and under that girls have a pee pee hole, poo poo hole, and a baby hole. Worked for them and this time they haven't asked any questions - except now it's "how does the baby get in there?" eeek! Not ready for that talk! LOL

 

[Daydreamer64]

told my kids 5 and under that girls have a pee pee hole, poo poo hole, and a baby hole. Worked for them and this time they haven't asked any questions - except now it's "how does the baby get in there?" eeek! Not ready for that talk! LOL

We told our boys the same information, never offered more then they asked for until we felt it was time.

One thing that worked for " how does it get there? ", was that the Daddy and Mommy hugged each other really close in a very special way that only Moms and Dads can.

Later when they wanted to know more but we weren't ready for full disclosure yet we told then that the Mom and Dad parts fit together like a lock and key. The youngest got it right away and turned around to educate the oldest who didn't put 2 and 2 together at the time .

They didn't ask how Dad's contribution made it's move, and we didn't feel it was the right time for the whole "how everything works" talk, so they had correct information on an age appropriate level.

Now of course, as teens, they know it all.

 

[rastika]

A friend of mine very simply explained to his young son that the baby grows in a place called the womb and comes out from the birth canal. It satisfied his curiosity and was accurate. Good luck

 

[mjkacmom]

To each their own. I personally don't think a 4 year old needs that kind of information. It has nothing to do with a comfort level for me, I just don't think it is something small children need to know the specifics of. YMMV.

I don't think 4 year olds need to know how babies are made, but I see no reason to shield them from the biology of how babies are born. I see it in the same discussion of how babies get milk from their mothers' breasts. Babies come out of their mothers' ******, there is nothing shameful or dirty about it. It is a body part, same as your leg, nose, thumb, mouth - yes, it is private, like your breasts, but has a function. I feel one should never lie to their children about these types of issues (storks bring the babies, or in your case, it's "magic" - it's not magic, it's biology). JMHO (and that of every expert I've ever heard speak or write about this subject).

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I don't think 4 year olds need to know how babies are made, but I see no reason to shield them from the biology of how babies are born. I see it in the same discussion of how babies get milk from their mothers' breasts. Babies come out of their mothers' ******, there is nothing shameful or dirty about it. It is a body part, same as your leg, nose, thumb, mouth - yes, it is private, like your breasts, but has a function. I feel one should never lie to their children about these types of issues (storks bring the babies, or in your case, it's "magic" - it's not magic, it's biology). JMHO (and that of every expert I've ever heard speak or write about this subject).

Well we are each entitled to our opinions. I don't think it is shameful or dirty. I simply don't feel it is something young children need to know about. I also find the term "expert" to be laughable. You have children and so do I. Would that make us experts because we are constantly observing/finding new ways to do things etc.? There will always be someone who is an "expert" who will agree with anyone's view. We do what we know is best for our family. If you tell your kids then that's great. That works for you. I don't really care what others do. I think there are some things that are better left a mystery until an older age. YMMV.