crazymomof4
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2003
Watch for this new "Survior Series":
Six married men will be dropped on an island with ONE CAR and
FOUR KIDS each for six weeks. (If they can actually last that long!)
Each kid plays two sports and either takes music or dance
classes.
There is NO FAST FOOD.
Each man must take care of his four kids, keep his assigned house
clean,correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do
laundry, and pay a list of "pretend" bills with not enough money.
In addition .. each man will have to budget in money for
groceries each week.
Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a
dentist appointment, and an appointment for a haircut.
He must also make cookies or muffins for a social function.
Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned
house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all
times.
The men will only have access to television when the kids are
asleep and all chores are done.
There is only one TV between them and there is NO REMOTE! (This will
eliminate
several if not all players.)
Each father will be required to know all of the words to every
stupid song that comes on TV and the name of each and every repulsive
character on cartoons.
The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, which they
will apply themselves either while driving or making four lunches.
They must adorn themselves with jewelry, wear uncomfortable, but
stylish shoes, keep their nails neatly polished and eyebrows groomed.
During one of the six weeks they will have to endure severe
stomach cramps, back aches and have extreme, unexplained mood swings
but never once complain or slow down from other duties.
They must attend weekly church and find time at least once to
spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
He will need to read at least two stories with the children each night,
bathe them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair each
morning by 7:00.
A TEST will be given at the end of the six weeks (if there is anyone
left) and each father will be required to know all of the
following information without even thinking:
1. Each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes
size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time
of birth and length of labor.
2. Each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack,
favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they
want to be when they grow up.
They must clean up after their sick children at 3:00 am and then
spend the remainder of the day tending to that child and waiting on
them hand and foot until they are better.
Each man will have to make an Indian hut model with six
toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker and get a four year old to eat a
serving of peas. (Yeah...sure, like that's gonna happen!)
The kids vote them off the island based on performance.
The last man wins only if he still has enough energy to be
intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.
If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over
and over again for the next 18-25 years... eventually earning the
right to be called a MOTHER!!! (In a positive way, of course.)
Six married men will be dropped on an island with ONE CAR and
FOUR KIDS each for six weeks. (If they can actually last that long!)
Each kid plays two sports and either takes music or dance
classes.
There is NO FAST FOOD.
Each man must take care of his four kids, keep his assigned house
clean,correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do
laundry, and pay a list of "pretend" bills with not enough money.
In addition .. each man will have to budget in money for
groceries each week.
Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a
dentist appointment, and an appointment for a haircut.
He must also make cookies or muffins for a social function.
Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned
house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all
times.
The men will only have access to television when the kids are
asleep and all chores are done.
There is only one TV between them and there is NO REMOTE! (This will
eliminate
several if not all players.)
Each father will be required to know all of the words to every
stupid song that comes on TV and the name of each and every repulsive
character on cartoons.
The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, which they
will apply themselves either while driving or making four lunches.
They must adorn themselves with jewelry, wear uncomfortable, but
stylish shoes, keep their nails neatly polished and eyebrows groomed.
During one of the six weeks they will have to endure severe
stomach cramps, back aches and have extreme, unexplained mood swings
but never once complain or slow down from other duties.
They must attend weekly church and find time at least once to
spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
He will need to read at least two stories with the children each night,
bathe them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair each
morning by 7:00.
A TEST will be given at the end of the six weeks (if there is anyone
left) and each father will be required to know all of the
following information without even thinking:
1. Each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes
size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time
of birth and length of labor.
2. Each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack,
favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they
want to be when they grow up.
They must clean up after their sick children at 3:00 am and then
spend the remainder of the day tending to that child and waiting on
them hand and foot until they are better.
Each man will have to make an Indian hut model with six
toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker and get a four year old to eat a
serving of peas. (Yeah...sure, like that's gonna happen!)
The kids vote them off the island based on performance.
The last man wins only if he still has enough energy to be
intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.
If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over
and over again for the next 18-25 years... eventually earning the
right to be called a MOTHER!!! (In a positive way, of course.)
GEEZ!
)
So glad someone else has admitted this! My girlfriends and I have all said that when DH goes away (not for too long) we are often able to catch our breath and have a small break 
I love him dearly, but he keeps me going 90 to nothin', just like my monkeys do! 
Prayers for you Becky. I share your grief. My mom's been gone for 13 years this spring and it seems like yesterday. Mother's Day is always bittersweet. Crazymom-thanks for the giggle! Life's too short not to laugh.... A LOT 
Here's a great big one from me to you!
