OT: Hug your kids

[dpuck1998]

Don, I do agree with you - however, city kids are a little different. They are usually more street savvy, and/or independant. Some city kids take the city bus, or subway to school by themselves, so it's not unusual for them to be walking to/from school alone.

I did consider that and was aware I'd catch some flak for saying anything, but 8 just seems so young for even the city kids. He is in second grade max? Just me, but if I were to let him go alone, I would be "spying" on him the first trip or two for sure.

Of course this monster is the only person to blame! I just hope after such a tragedy there is something to be learned.

Agreed, we can all play monday morning QB and I'm sure we have each done something that could have turned out bad and didn't. I pray for the family and that they will be able to find a way to cope.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

Can someone who is familiar with the legal system please explain why this man is going to be charged for second degree murder? I'm not sure of the differences between first and second, but it seems to me that this was such a heinous crime that he should face the highest charges. There is also no question of his guilt because he confessed to doing it and showed the police where the child's remains were. Am I missing something?

In New York, a charge of first degree murder can be brought only when the victim is a police or corrections officer.

 

[roomthreeseventeen]

In New York, a charge of first degree murder can be brought only when the victim is a police or corrections officer.

Sorry, not true.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

Okay, or a witness, terrorism or a felony murder or there was torture involved. Most of that doesn't apply to this case. So in this case they would have to also charge him with another felony such as kidnapping before they can charge him with first degree murder or prove he tortured the kid. But first degree in NY doesn't have anything to do with premeditation.

 

[disprincessatheart]

Sorry, not true.

Okay, or a witness, terrorism or a felony murder or there was torture involved. Most of that doesn't apply to this case. So in this case they would have to also charge him with another felony such as kidnapping before they can charge him with first degree murder or prove he tortured the kid. But first degree in NY doesn't have anything to do with premeditation.

Hmm, part vii says they can charge 1st degree if the victim was murdered during a kidnapping, which is exactly what this was, so I wonder why his charge isn't 1st degree?

 

[mjaclyn]

I just read on CNN that he was arraigned for murder in the first degree.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/CRIME/07/14/new.york.boy.slain/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

 

[*NikkiBell*]

I just read on CNN that he was arraigned for murder in the first degree.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/CRIME/07/14/new.york.boy.slain/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

Thanks for posting that. What a sad situation for the family.

 

[YukiPhnx]

It's unfortunate that situations like this and the media coverage it gets reinforces the belief of STRANGER DANGER when the vast majority of children are abused by people they know such as family members and teachers.

I'm not saying you have to watch out for your kid EVEN MORE now, but it's not about not letting them do anything, it's about teaching them to recognize when something is not right and being able to run away from it.

Children are usually not just grabbed off the street, they are usually LURED somewhere by the perp.

Just putting in my 2 cents.

 

[disney4dan]

This is truly a sad case and difficult to comprehend how cruelty and evil can really exist. Many years ago PBS did a documentary on how Washington State came up with the three strikes law for child molesters. If you ever want to creep yourself out, watch that show if it is still available in archives and see what goes on in the mind of these sick people. Nightmarish.

 

[manhattan]

I saw this on the NY Post daily email...couldn't even bring myself to click on the link. Today I finally read the article on the Times....its so sad. I totally can understand the parents wanting to let him walk alone, its just part of growing up in NY. I remember letting my son go to the corner store by himself at that age, never thought anything about it. My DD8 wants to walk home, its less than 1/2 mile and only one road to cross with a crossing guard, my DH's reaction to this story was, there is no way she is walking home alone. Ever since I moved here to Florida I have said that I always felt safer in NY than here....guess you really can't feel safe anywhere now.

 

[topolino]

If I had kids I'd instruct them that if they absolutely had to talk to a stranger for any reason, approach a woman instead of a man. The odds go down significantly that a woman would do something like this as opposed to a man.

 

[roomthreeseventeen]

If I had kids I'd instruct them that if they absolutely had to talk to a stranger for any reason, approach a woman instead of a man. The odds go down significantly that a woman would do something like this as opposed to a man.

I was always taught to look for someone with kids.

 

[topolino]

I was always taught to look for someone with kids.

Smart parents you've got there.

My mom used to tell me to look for a cop or someone else in uniform. If that was not possible, she told me to go to someone working in a store or place of business.

 

[Sammie]

I saw this on the news tonight. What a mess and a horrific murder (I won't go into the details here, but they are on Eyewitness News' website).




This must be something they just found out. It wasn't reported at 6. They said he was originally from the south and known as "weird."

He was from NY, he lived in TN for a couple of years and at that time, no one thought he was weird. He had a wife and a job. They ended up getting a divorce and he moved back home to NYC. He was not a known child molester, but did have a head injury from an accident.

Just such a very sad story for the boy and his family.

 

[smidgy]

I totally agree. As much as I feel for the parents who must be in agony, I don't know what they were thinking. I don't even let my 13yr old walk alone, you just never know!

um, you obviously don't feel for them, as you are trying to make them feel guilty. you don't let your 13 year old walk alone? most teen babysitters are 13 or 14.

 

[smidgy]

.

Unfortunatley, these parents did make the decision to let the child walk part way home and they will have to live with their decision for the rest of their lives.

it is not very tactful or kind to try to make these parent sfeel like it is THEIR fault!!! that there are perverts and evil people in this world. boy, try to lay the guilt on, why don't you? there have been evil people, stealing children out of their bedrooms in the middle of the night. you can't watch your kids constantly.. lay off these poor , grieving parents

 

[MakiraMarlena]

Am assuming that at first they didn't have enough information to charge him with kidnapping as they didn't know how the kid got in his house, after they got more info, like the camera footage (not to mention he confessed), they could charge him with the kidnapping and therefore first degree murder.

Haven't seen anything that the guy had a record as a child molester, just that he had one citation for urinating in public and he apparently had mental issues.

 

[Cruz Family]

um, you obviously don't feel for them, as you are trying to make them feel guilty. you don't let your 13 year old walk alone? most teen babysitters are 13 or 14.

First of all, as for me trying to make them feel guilty.....are they reading this???? Im not publishing this in a paper in hopes they see it and feel even worse than they already do! I am just saying what I feel, which in hindsight is probably something they would agree with. The fact that he got lost is just more evidence that 8 years old is too young for that kind of responsibility.
What I do with my 13 year old is my choice and I as well have to live with the consequences. I would rather have him be safe than be sorry. And as for me not feeling for them....just because I might not agree with the choice they made, does not mean I can't feel bad for them. They lost a child to the hands of a monster. That is devastating to any parent, reguardless of what led up to it!

 

[Launchpad11B]

First of all, as for me trying to make them feel guilty.....are they reading this???? Im not publishing this in a paper in hopes they see it and feel even worse than they already do! I am just saying what I feel, which in hindsight is probably something they would agree with. The fact that he got lost is just more evidence that 8 years old is too young for that kind of responsibility.
What I do with my 13 year old is my choice and I as well have to live with the consequences. I would rather have him be safe than be sorry. And as for me not feeling for them....just because I might not agree with the choice they made, does not mean I can't feel bad for them. They lost a child to the hands of a monster. That is devastating to any parent, reguardless of what led up to it!

Good for you Melissa. Great post.

 

[miprender]

When I saw yesterday on the news what happened it just made me sick. As a mother of a DD8 I just can't believe anyone could do that to a child.

it is not very tactful or kind to try to make these parent sfeel like it is THEIR fault!!! that there are perverts and evil people in this world. boy, try to lay the guilt on, why don't you? there have been evil people, stealing children out of their bedrooms in the middle of the night. you can't watch your kids constantly.. lay off these poor , grieving parents

No one was saying it was their fault. I don't think that poster was saying anything untrue or laying blame. I am sure those parents are blaming themselves for that decision. No matter how many kids walk around NYC safetly everyday.