Opinions needed re kids on their own

[disneyfantotheend]

I would not let the most responsible of 11 year olds babysit my children nor would I have had them babysitting at that age. But that is not the question at hand. Being responsible for yourself and babysitting are two different things.

I would think, if you feel comfortable with it, it would be fine to leave them for a short time while you ride something. That includes leaving them in an adjoining gift shop (if they are responsible enough to look without touching), leaving them on a nearby bench with a snack or taking them to the chicken exit. Whatever you feel comfortable with. I would only do it, if I had a FP or waits were under 30 minutes. Wouldn't want them waiting for an hour long line, plus the duration of the ride and a possible breakdown time. I agree you should both have cell phones,and I would want the kids to stay together. Mine are closer in age, so I never put one in charge of the other, just said stay together at all times.

 

[Jennybump]

My kids are that age exactly and I would have no problem leaving them somewhere they were settled with everything they need, as long as they are comfortable doing so. My kids would be quite capable, especially with a run-through, of being left in a counter service restaurant with food and then when they're done walking to a nearby play area or attraction to stay occupied while they wait. All they need is a watch, really, so that I can say, "it's 1:30 now, try and be out of here by 2 so that you're at the Boneyard a few minutes after and I'll know where to look for you depending on when I get off Dinosaur." Easy-peasy.

 

[Cyrano]

Folks continue the babysitting discussions on the Community board.
Discussions here are for Theme Park planning only.

Thank you

 

[paintnolish]

You know them best. I would have no concerns about the 11 year old, but what about the 8.5 year old? Do you trust him to stay where he should, or will his older sibling be in charge of watching him? I let ds and dd go through a que and ride together last year at 11 and 12. They also routinely split up from us in stores, knowing they should not leave the store. This trip I might let ds (13 now) roam a bit on his own.
Good luck, op.

 

[Goseethemouse]

Thanks for all the replies. I have to admit that I am surprised at how many people would not leave kids my age to wait for a short time. Again, we have been to Disney three times already (and each trip was 10+ days) so the boys are quite familiar with the parks. I am really only talking about a handful of rides and definitely wouldn't do them if there was a wait etc. (so I'd say maximum time would be 20 minutes depending on the ride). Especially the 8 year old is very reliable/mature (11 year old is fine too but they are probably about at the same Level)

I am not worried that they would wander off/go with a stranger and really don't think there is that much that could happen to them. I did let my then 9 year old go on rides on his own on our last trip - with a fastpass or if there were no lines and I would wait with DS2 at the exit. As Disney allows kids 8 and up to ride on their own I assumed that would be fine and there were no problems.

One or both of the boys don't care for/refuse Haunted Mansion, Splash Mountain, Space Mountain, Big Thunder, Soaring, Mission Space, Test Track, Expedition Everest, Dino, Kali River Rapids, Movie Ride, Tough to be a bug, Tot, Rock n Rollercoaster, Maelstrom... Some they will ride (if not too happily), some I don't mind missing out on but there are a couple I really would like to go on/try (mostly Mission Space and Dino).

We live in Europe and here almost all first graders walk on their own to and from school and 11 year olds ride their bikes to the local pool and spend the afternoon there without adult supervision (I actually don't let mine do that though). Maybe I am too naive but I don't really think it likely that something would happen to them in Disneyworld (not because it is Disney but just because they will be out in the open, together and there are plenty of other people around).

Anyway, I appreciate everyone's opinion and will give this some more thought.

 

[DisneyDoc5]

I have boys 14 and 11. In previous trips when they were the similar ages as yours, we let the wait together for this or that, key word together, and they are responsible. We let them ride the monorail around the loop alone at 13 and 10, let them go around on the lazy river alone, thye were super excited about these opportunities. We were still 'in' the parks with them, my older son has a phone, and it was for a small and set amount of time. I think if you set clear parameters and they are responsible, go for it! I am a hovering parent, and I have to allow my 14 year old to start having more and more independence, albeit in controlled settings, he is going to be driving a car in a few years for crying out loud! I think letting them wait outside a ride, or ride a ride alone, with you close by is a lot different then dropping them in the park and leaving them for the day. Have a great trip!

 

[Magpie]

We live in Europe and here almost all first graders walk on their own to and from school and 11 year olds ride their bikes to the local pool and spend the afternoon there without adult supervision (I actually don't let mine do that though). Maybe I am too naive but I don't really think it likely that something would happen to them in Disneyworld (not because it is Disney but just because they will be out in the open, together and there are plenty of other people around).

Anyway, I appreciate everyone's opinion and will give this some more thought.

The culture of how to raise kids is very different in some areas.

For what it's worth, though, I live in Canada. Here, first graders don't walk to school, but certainly third graders do. It's because we have a lot of traffic in our town. By 5, my kids were play outside our home unsupervised, with other neighbourhood children. By 7, they were picking things up at the grocery store for me. By 9, my kids were ordering and paying for lunch at the local diner, all on their own. By 11, my son was taking the public transit to his summer day camp.

I've trained them what to do in a crisis, and they've always been reliable. When my son (aged 9) fainted, his 11yo sister made sure someone was calling 911, and then borrowed a phone from a bystander and called me to tell me the paramedics were coming. Then she told that bystander (a college girl) that she needed to wait until I showed up, remembering exactly what I'd always told her about picking a stranger to trust, when you're in trouble (instead of letting a stranger pick you). I was proud of her!

Honestly, I'm not surprised at the responses you got, though. In the mommy wars, you mustn't leave your children alone ever. And if you do, you're selfish and a bad mother. C'est la vie!

There are many ways to be a good parent. I'm sure at least one of them can include letting your kids wait while you ride a ride they don't want to go on. They'll learn that vacations are for everyone, and it's good to share. Have fun!

 

[MSSANDRA]

While I really think a typical 11 year old with an 8 year old sibling would be ok going through the line and waiting for you at the end, I would just skip the ride myself. Just would not enjoy it knowing i was rushing back to them. Would not leave them any longer than chicken exit to ride exit. What I would do, is give them less choice on opting out on so many rides. If there is a true fear of heights, motion sickness or something like that, of course skip it, otherwise I would let each choose one or two that they really do not want to ride and the rest you ride as a family at least one time to try it. TT and Soaring for example are both very mild rides, and by 8, HM should be ok, if not a favorite, for most 8-10 year olds.

You did mention your 11 year old being less mature and if that is true, I would not leave them even for a few minutes.

 

[Goseethemouse]

While I really think a typical 11 year old with an 8 year old sibling would be ok going through the line and waiting for you at the end, I would just skip the ride myself. Just would not enjoy it knowing i was rushing back to them. Would not leave them any longer than chicken exit to ride exit. What I would do, is give them less choice on opting out on so many rides. If there is a true fear of heights, motion sickness or something like that, of course skip it, otherwise I would let each choose one or two that they really do not want to ride and the rest you ride as a family at least one time to try it. TT and Soaring for example are both very mild rides, and by 8, HM should be ok, if not a favorite, for most 8-10 year olds.

You did mention your 11 year old being less mature and if that is true, I would not leave them even for a few minutes.

Sorry - I didn't mean my 11 year old is less mature - I think he is at least average for his age. But his younger brother is more mature than the average 8 year old (I think) so there isn't much difference between the two boys.

We did the "this ride really isn't so bad. Give it a try and maybe you'll love it" in the past and generally speaking it was not a success. I honestly think the kids would rather wait then go on.

I guess I will just wait and see how it goes once we are there.

 

[WantToGoNow]

I would think them playing in the Boneyard while you rode Dino would be fine.

My kids were those ages last summer and they stayed home alone all summer through the day while we worked. Dh is on 2nd shift now so they are only alone about 2 hours each day.

 

[disnut8]

Honestly, I'm not surprised at the responses you got, though. In the mommy wars, you mustn't leave your children alone ever. And if you do, you're selfish and a bad mother. C'est la vie!

There are many ways to be a good parent. I'm sure at least one of them can include letting your kids wait while you ride a ride they don't want to go on. They'll learn that vacations are for everyone, and it's good to share. Have fun!

Love this. My son was a latchkey kid at the age of 10. Before that, he was in after school day care and the helpers there actually told us our son was completely bored being there. So, I called the local police department to find out what the legal age of letting kids just ride the bus back to any empty home. I was told "it depends on the child and the circumstances". So, he rode the bus home every day, unlocked the door and called me at work and then stayed inside. When he was twelve, he was allowed to go over to his friend's house (across the street) and vice versa (with the friend's parents blessing). When he was 14, he was allowed to roam our neighborhood but not outside of it (we only had two entrances/exits). When he was sixteen, I couldn't really do too much because he had a car.

The point is - you don't hand your kids the stars and the moon at X age. You can build them up to being responsible. If not, how are they going to know what to do?

 

[Minniesgal]

14 or 15 is the youngest I will allow mine time alone I don't think it is safe any younger

 

[novajet]

That was the 1970's, when the world was a different place.

I don't think the world is different at all. It's just sensationalized now, and parents have reacted by becoming overprotective. The world is not different- parents are.

Many kids in that age range walk themselves home from school, and I think that waiting in a theme park for a short time is on par with that. IMO, you are giving them life skills by letting them grow and mature.

I agree completely!

 

[wdwlover25]

We let our DS8 go on Test Track as a single rider. I went through the single rider line behind him and gave him very specific instructions to wait for me by the pictures after the ride since we'd be separated. As an overprotective parent of an only child it was hard for me to let him go by himself. But I have to say he followed my instructions perfectly and really felt proud to do something on his own. We had been on the ride before so he was already familiar with the exit. He then wanted to walk around World Showcase by himself... Now that didn't happen!!

 

[North of Mouse]

I don't think the world is different at all. It's just sensationalized now, and parents have reacted by becoming overprotective. The world is not different- parents are.

I disagree! I think the world is definitely different! I grew up in the 60's and it is very obvious to me the difference.

OP, only you know your kids and how they respect what you say/want them to do. When mine were 11 and 8 I could trust them in most any situation. I did not leave them alone at home, but in the situations you mentioned I would definitely have left them and trusted them completely.

My oldest (dd) has always been responsible, and her brother was great with her, but I would not have left him alone without her.

 

[KittyyKattyy]

I personally think it would be fine if you let them maybe browse the gift shop for the ride you are riding. Maybe you'd want them to take a cell phone though, so if you got stuck you could text them. (You don't want to be on the phone when the ride starts back up!)

 

[joanchris]

If you know that your children would listen to you, stay where they are supposed to be, not separate (I would not leave the younger alone, maybe the older) from each other when apart from you I would leave them, either let them go through the exit after waiting in line with you, or possibly playing (like in the boneyard as you suggested). I would be sure one of them had a cell phone, so that you could contact each other if necessary (ie, text that there was an emergency bathroom run that they' were in the bathroom next to X).

 

[Freezing Cold B]

When I was a teenager my mom was going to let me and my friends run around the parks alone (I was maybe 15). She was chatting with a friend in Ocala (we live in the Midwest) and mentioned it to her. She told my mom her neighbor trolls for young girls at MK on their own, would flirt with them, pick them up, and take them to places to engage in "activities" with them. Then he would drop them off back at the parks. She found out about it when the police finally caught up with him. But, just because they caught him doesn't mean there aren't more out there. Apparently he had done this for many years. This probably would've been in the mid-late 1990's.

 

[revdon64]

I guess we just have to disagree on what age a child needs a babysitter in order to be without mommy for 15 minutes. Heck my 11 year old was skiing mountains 3 hours away without mommy and daddy, or any other adult constantly with her. Some 11 year olds navigate their way around NYC on their own. Some even ride their bikes to the public park and stay and play. They walk to their friends house in the next subdivision, they walk to school and home, etc etc. I think a lot of them at that age can handle sitting on a bench for 15 minutes in WDW while their parent enjoys a ride.
Of course, like I said it is about the individual child. I cant make a blanket statement that all kids that age can do it, I don't think its fair to say "no way, too young, its not safe for a child that age" either.

ETA I mentioned what I did because you said you wouldn't worry about the crazies, but that it was a family vacation. My point was that sometimes families make decisions that aren't always about the family as a whole. Some parents enjoy things their kids don't, and it is perfectly fine for them to do something they want on their family vacation like ride a ride and leave their children age 11 and 8 sitting on a bench waiting for them.

And of course you can predict that a ride will only be 15 minutes. Because wait times are always right and rides at Disney never break down stranding riders. Maybe your kids will be by themselves fifteen minutes and maybe stuff happens and they're alone a lot longer.

I have to say that if I was a pedophile i'd be planning a trip to Disney just from reading this thread. Sounds to me that there are a lot of parents making it a target rich environment.

 

[lizzi6692]

And of course you can predict that a ride will only be 15 minutes. Because wait times are always right and rides at Disney never break down stranding riders. Maybe your kids will be by themselves fifteen minutes and maybe stuff happens and they're alone a lot longer.

I have to say that if I was a pedophile i'd be planning a trip to Disney just from reading this thread. Sounds to me that there are a lot of parents making it a target rich environment.

And yet there's never been a proven accusation of a stranger touching or kidnapping kids at Disney World.