No Whining! It's Over!

[Song of the South]

So...those following the saga our trip happened. We checked into Kidani for the immediate family only portion of our trip. First time at Kidani. Loved the pool but overall liked Jambo better. And that is okay! As we were getting ready to go to dinner (Kouzzina! Yum!) on Wednesday night my DH's work called my cell. They wanted to know if he wanted to take one of his leave days as vacation instead of having to switch shifts with someone. Yes! So that was great.

Friday we checked everyone into BLT. BLT is our home resort and we just love it! My inlaws had the studio adjoined to our 1 bedroom. I was a little bit nonplussed about this but it ended up being fine. They liked having my DDs come over in the morning to tell them hello (But did not want night night snuggles. Weird. I made the offer which is all I can do!) and that was good.

We all attended MNSSHP the first night. Once again, probably the last time we will go but everyone else seemed to enjoy it (and it saved them $$$ to go to the party rather than a regular MK ticket).

DH's uncle showed up to our dinner reservation unannounced at the Plaza. They were gracious and added one so we were 15. Then they split us into 2 tables...wait for it...a 12 top and a 3. I asked for a table adjoining/nearby the other since it was empty. I was told, "No! Different section!" So I sat in the corner 3 top with DH's other aunt and uncle. Still, a little strange.

We really didn't spend much time with his family. He was sad about that. Especially his brother and his brother's family we only saw at dinner the first night. Our plan had been to meet up once a day for one meal. That got changed after the first day by others in the group (not us). We rolled with it but did not like it.

Which helped lead us to the conclusion that we like going to Disney with other people. BUT we go with people we like and want to spend time with and who will spend time with us. Otherwise, even if it is our idea, we feel like we are being used. Not very reinforcing! So, now we know!

His parents had insisted on paying for all meals and tickets but then complained about the prices. Consistently. We had warned them. We said footing the bill for us was unnecessary. Am I the only one who finds that kind of situation totally uncomfortable? At least we had our APs so there could not be grousing over the cost of our tickets.

Overall, we would go with his parents again but probably not the whole family...at least not at our suggestion or points.

So, we survived and I think relationships with grandparents and grandchildren strengthened. 2 of several trip goals accomplished!

 

[bobbiwoz]

Yeah! I am happy for you!!!

Bobbi

 

[N365PA]

I will only go to Disney with my parents as they are the people who got me into Disney, which I passed on to my wife. I always hate taking other friends and family as they just don't get "Disney."

Glad you enjoyed our home resort!

 

[disneynutz]

We decided to keep Disney to ourselves.

People are people, they all have their own likes, dislikes, opinions, and expectations. The fact that they may be related doesn't change that.

Bill

 

[wdwnut]

We've been going and taking family and friends since '87. We have had as small a group as 5 to family groups of 28. Once we hosted JV and Varsity cross country teams and coaches.

Some trips were wonderful and others we would not repeat. We're biting the bullet and taking 23 family members next May. Wish us luck!

 

[Dean]

So...those following the saga our trip happened. We checked into Kidani for the immediate family only portion of our trip. First time at Kidani. Loved the pool but overall liked Jambo better. And that is okay! As we were getting ready to go to dinner (Kouzzina! Yum!) on Wednesday night my DH's work called my cell. They wanted to know if he wanted to take one of his leave days as vacation instead of having to switch shifts with someone. Yes! So that was great.

Friday we checked everyone into BLT. BLT is our home resort and we just love it! My inlaws had the studio adjoined to our 1 bedroom. I was a little bit nonplussed about this but it ended up being fine. They liked having my DDs come over in the morning to tell them hello (But did not want night night snuggles. Weird. I made the offer which is all I can do!) and that was good.

We all attended MNSSHP the first night. Once again, probably the last time we will go but everyone else seemed to enjoy it (and it saved them $$$ to go to the party rather than a regular MK ticket).

DH's uncle showed up to our dinner reservation unannounced at the Plaza. They were gracious and added one so we were 15. Then they split us into 2 tables...wait for it...a 12 top and a 3. I asked for a table adjoining/nearby the other since it was empty. I was told, "No! Different section!" So I sat in the corner 3 top with DH's other aunt and uncle. Still, a little strange.

We really didn't spend much time with his family. He was sad about that. Especially his brother and his brother's family we only saw at dinner the first night. Our plan had been to meet up once a day for one meal. That got changed after the first day by others in the group (not us). We rolled with it but did not like it.

Which helped lead us to the conclusion that we like going to Disney with other people. BUT we go with people we like and want to spend time with and who will spend time with us. Otherwise, even if it is our idea, we feel like we are being used. Not very reinforcing! So, now we know!

His parents had insisted on paying for all meals and tickets but then complained about the prices. Consistently. We had warned them. We said footing the bill for us was unnecessary. Am I the only one who finds that kind of situation totally uncomfortable? At least we had our APs so there could not be grousing over the cost of our tickets.

Overall, we would go with his parents again but probably not the whole family...at least not at our suggestion or points.

So, we survived and I think relationships with grandparents and grandchildren strengthened. 2 of several trip goals accomplished!

My view is this, family or group trips are a risk. As a rule, people seem to assume that others will be on their best behavior but from what I've seen her on DIS and other places, the reverse it true. Bottom line is that if anyone is a problem at any time, they'll likely be worse with a Disney trip. I think older people tend to be shocked at the prices more often than not. I remember a breakfast with my in-laws a number of years ago at a nicer hotel when they looked at the prices. Fortunately for us, we haven't had those issues but I retain control of resort, dates, even who's invited. However, I go to great lengths not to control other people's vacations.

 

[crisi]

Which helped lead us to the conclusion that we like going to Disney with other people. BUT we go with people we like and want to spend time with and who will spend time with us. Otherwise, even if it is our idea, we feel like we are being used. Not very reinforcing! So, now we know!

Yep, invite the people you like and who you want to spend time with - and who want to spend time with you. Don't be pressured by those people into explading the invitation to the louts in your family who will take your "free" room and complain about lack of daily housekeeping or a bad view.

His parents had insisted on paying for all meals and tickets but then complained about the prices. Consistently. We had warned them. We said footing the bill for us was unnecessary. Am I the only one who finds that kind of situation totally uncomfortable? At least we had our APs so there could not be grousing over the cost of our tickets.

No, drives me nuts. Unfortunately, I'm "outspoken" and so I simply say "If you are going to complain, we will pay - we said you didn't need to do so and you don't. So either pay and stop complaining so I stop feeling like _____ or simply say "we didn't realize it would be so expensive, we should have listened" and we will pay.

 

[JimMIA]

We really didn't spend much time with his family. He was sad about that. Especially his brother and his brother's family we only saw at dinner the first night. Our plan had been to meet up once a day for one meal. That got changed after the first day by others in the group (not us). We rolled with it but did not like it.

Which helped lead us to the conclusion that we like going to Disney with other people. BUT we go with people we like and want to spend time with and who will spend time with us. Otherwise, even if it is our idea, we feel like we are being used. Not very reinforcing! So, now we know!

Friends of ours (and incidentally, the most family-loving, family-supportive people we know) have a sign on their pool deck that reads:

Friends welcome any time
Family by appointment only!

I love my family, but I recognize that sometimes wisdom comes in small packages.

His parents had insisted on paying for all meals and tickets... We said footing the bill for us was unnecessary. Am I the only one who finds that kind of situation totally uncomfortable?

Oh heck no! We recently ran into this with some people we hardly know. Three families at the same event for a weekend, with several joint dinners and a lot of time together. All three families can well afford to pay for whatever they want. One dad insisted on constantly picking up tabs for dinner (for 11 people), saying he was the one who ordered all that Dom and therefore should pay. He also bought trinkets for our girls for no reason, and without asking either set of parents. Big man.

We not only found it uncomfortable, we didn't think it was all that friendly and will avoid them on future trips where they will be around.

but then complained about the prices. Consistently. We had warned them.

That's just really poor manners. They apparently thought you were insufficiently appreciative. At least the boor we were saddled with didn't do that.

 

[WolfpackFan]

I would love to go to WDW with a family group at some point. We've never done this because basically my brothers and their families have no interest in WDW. So usually it is just DW and myself (with DD occasionally before she got married). Gets kind of boring sometime just the two of us. We now have a grandchild on the way . Hopefully in a couple of years we can go with DD, DSIL and DGB.

 

[bakerworld]

Love my Family - Love my kids (how can you not love your own kids) but vacationing with them isn't the most relaxing because I am so busy being MOM. I like vacationing with my sisters because I'm the younger and no matter what age people always treat you like they do so vacation with my sisters is like being coddled - roughly

 

[Sammie]

We decided to keep Disney to ourselves.

People are people, they all have their own likes, dislikes, opinions, and expectations. The fact that they may be related doesn't change that.

Bill

Agreed, we tried it. It did not work, we did not try again.

 

[JustTinking]

We take family to WDW a lot. Mostly DH's family as mine does not like the Disney thing. Because of economics, we usually foot the bill. I think as long as you know that going in, and aren't resentful because of it, it's all okay. We know they could not afford these trips on their own. DH's parents are gone now, so we will not be doing this as much, but we are glad we had the time with them when we did. We made lots of good memories.

 

[DisneyFreaks]

We always travel with our two grown children and their families. And we always have a wonderful time. Especially with our two DGS now. A few years ago we treated our son in law's brother and his family to some of our points since they were dying to see WDW. They complained about everything. The food, the cost of food, the crowds, etc.,etc. Then later at an event at our DD's home we overheard them talking with someone about vacation destinations and the wife said "Oh we would never go there. We're Disney people" DH and I had a good laugh with that one.

 

[LOVEARS]

I think it would be difficult to spend more than a few days at any Disney property with anyone who's not a "disney" person; much less the stress of family members who aren't.

I think so many people get "turned off" by the cost vs. quality. In an age where full service gas is almost a thing of the past and any quality customer service is hard to find on a normal basis; disney offers an experience where "bad service" is the exception to the norm.

Anyways, best of luck to everyone who can share the "most magical place on earth" with their family and friends!!!

 

[LOVEARS]

I think it would be difficult to spend more than a few days at any Disney property with anyone who's not a "disney" person; much less the stress of family members who aren't.

I think so many people get "turned off" by the cost vs. quality. In an age where full service gas is almost a thing of the past and any quality customer service is hard to find on a normal basis; disney offers an experience where "bad service" is the exception to the norm.

Anyways, best of luck to everyone who can share the "most magical place on earth" with their family and friends!!!

 

[AdamsMum]

I have gone several times now with my brother and sister-in-law (she gets Disney) and their kids. The split the cost of the maintenance fees with me and appreciate that I am using more points for my vacation than I normally would (I am constantly borrowed out).

I don't know if I'd be willing to go with any other family members. My ds and mother had both hinted about going with me to the f&w festival. But I stayed strong and announced this as my solo trip.

 

[crisi]

I think it would be difficult to spend more than a few days at any Disney property with anyone who's not a "disney" person; much less the stress of family members who aren't.

I think so many people get "turned off" by the cost vs. quality. In an age where full service gas is almost a thing of the past and any quality customer service is hard to find on a normal basis; disney offers an experience where "bad service" is the exception to the norm.

Anyways, best of luck to everyone who can share the "most magical place on earth" with their family and friends!!!

I'm not really sure that's true - its true on the cruise, but then its pretty true on all cruise lines that customer service is high. Granted, I tend to spend a little more to shop at Nordstrom or when we eat out, but I don't find Disney's customer service at all superior to what I normally experience when shopping, dining or traveling - in fact, it isn't quite as nice as what I'm used to. It isn't that Disney's service is bad - but its astoundingly mediocre compared to what it was in the late 1980s. And feels very assembly line. They are living off a 20 year old reputation.

 

[GiantsNiners11]

I'm not really sure that's true - its true on the cruise, but then its pretty true on all cruise lines that customer service is high. Granted, I tend to spend a little more to shop at Nordstrom or when we eat out, but I don't find Disney's customer service at all superior to what I normally experience when shopping, dining or traveling - in fact, it isn't quite as nice as what I'm used to. It isn't that Disney's service is bad - but its astoundingly mediocre compared to what it was in the late 1980s. And feels very assembly line. They are living off a 20 year old reputation.

I agree with this 100% in regards to WDW. It's great customer service, but it's not the true Disney standard.

However, some good news....this is only in WDW. DLR still has that something extra, so maybe because the parks are smaller with less CM to train....DLR has the superior customer service that is truly "felt".

It's this reason alone that as much I love WDW and will visit as often as we can, DLR is a bit more magical.

 

[DonnaL]

Definitely agree with above poster who stated it's difficult to spend more than a few days at Disney with someone who's not a "Disney" person. We have very good friends...have been friends since the mid 1970's.... who we usually see about once a week for dinner these days (now that all of our kids are adults and neither couple is running to all sorts of sporting, dance, etc. events) and several years ago we treated them to several days with us at WDW....we had two studios at SSR. It was great the first day.....ok the second day......by the third day...they had enough and so did we!! We continue to do other things with them......but most likely will not ever invite them to WDW with us again......fortunately it didn't cause a rift between us....but they are not "Disney" people and will never "get it".....they still shake their head and say "you're going to Disney again" and we continue to say "Yep....can't wait to get there".

 

[OrangeCountyCommuter]

I agree with this 100% in regards to WDW. It's great customer service, but it's not the true Disney standard.

However, some good news....this is only in WDW. DLR still has that something extra, so maybe because the parks are smaller with less CM to train....DLR has the superior customer service that is truly "felt".

It's this reason alone that as much I love WDW and will visit as often as we can, DLR is a bit more magical.

I have the exact opposite reaction. While I think WDW has slipped dramatically I find DL pathetic.