My turn to ask (longish)

[mommasita]

I don't do this often, but I am asking for whatever you have please.

I was to return to work this month, after what would have been 6 years in January.. To say I was looking forward would be an understatement.. I haven't been feeling well. DIZZY.. So I have been taking my blood pressure EVERYWHERE.. Collecting the little papers. .I am king of stubborn, I have had a few brain surgeries, and I was hoping that all the health issues were behind me.. Anyway, after getting 4 steady days of 79/41, I called my GP.. His reading was even lower... The next day (yesterday) I saw the cardiologist, after every test with him (same office), and him telling me my heart seemed perfect, he called my GP in..

He said stand up, look at me.. They both looked at each other and said her head is shaking, a few medical terms? The other Dr said he didn't know if that was "my normal", etc etc.. As it turns out, my eye was drooping, diagnosed as Ptosis... The Neuro of the office came and I failed the Neuro test.. I BEGGED for them to give me the weekend and to call my Neuro on Monday.. They are worried something is back, or worse..

So in short, I can't take this job now..I was due to start Monday I know what is in store for this week. Ct scan, MRI.. Appointment after appt.. More bloods probably.. I did some last week.. Unreal that this is happening, just when I was looking forward to starting back..

Just asking for whatever thoughts you can muster.. Thanks.. I a m trying to really downplay this at home now..

 

[Christine]

I am so sorry. That's got to be an incredible blow. While I haven't been off work due to medical procedures for the length of time you have, I have been out for 3 months, several weeks, and then a few months for other reasons.

For me, part of my "healing" mentally is just to be at work and do what, in my mind, is normal things. Not being able to work is just really hard to deal with and certainly kicks of depression and makes me feel like I'm not whole. So I know what is going through your head right now.

Let's just hope in this next week or two, the doctors can figure out what is causing your most recent problems. I am not familiar with your history and why you had these previous surgeries? Do you feel that this is all related or possibly something different?

 

[mommasita]

Thank you..

I really don't know anymore.. I didn't think so, but they all seem to..

I have/had Chiari Malformation.. It is a malformation in the base of your brain, where it sits on your spinal cord. In such a case there is basically no room, and it touches and dangles onto your spinal cord.. I also had a cyst there.. My last surgery, I rejected the patch, and suffered an extreme CSF leak, where they weren't sure if I was honestly going to pull through.. I suffered a lot of memory loss, as this is in the cerebellum and the memory is there.. I have managed to "try" and get to the best I will be.. I do have permanent loss, but I try to not let it get the best of me.. It only shows it's ugly head in a conversation, or If I am asked to do more than one thing at a time.. I VERY much want to work again.. Perhaps I was a little over excited/

I say have/had because there is no cure.. It is a band-aid approach, it does grow back, one never knows at what rate..

Hoping for the best for this week... Testing for Addison's tomorrow.. I appreciate your words. Thanks

 

[Christine]

Thank you..

I really don't know anymore.. I didn't think so, but they all seem to..

I have/had Chiari Malformation.. It is a malformation in the base of your brain, where it sits on your spinal cord. In such a case there is basically no room, and it touches and dangles onto your spinal cord.. I also had a cyst there.. My last surgery, I rejected the patch, and suffered an extreme CSF leak, where they weren't sure if I was honestly going to pull through.. I suffered a lot of memory loss, as this is in the cerebellum and the memory is there.. I have managed to "try" and get to the best I will be.. I do have permanent loss, but I try to not let it get the best of me.. It only shows it's ugly head in a conversation, or If I am asked to do more than one thing at a time.. I VERY much want to work again.. Perhaps I was a little over excited/

I say have/had because there is no cure.. It is a band-aid approach, it does grow back, one never knows at what rate..

Hoping for the best for this week... Testing for Addison's tomorrow.. I appreciate your words. Thanks

Ah, okay, thanks for the info. I actually do recall reading your previous posts before about this and, believe it or not, I have heard of it (that's one benefit of having a touch of hypochondria--being familiar with many medical issues!).

Again, I really do hope that they can figure this it quickly for you. It is so emotionally draining and, not to mention, scary to not know what is going on.

 

[luvmarypoppins]

I am so sorry to hear you are going through such a rough time physically Mommasita.

You are always so kind with your encouraging words to others.

I am sure it seems like you cant see the light at the end of the tunnel at times, but yes, it is there. Hold on to hope!

Sending you prayers and praying that your health care team can get to the bottom of your health issues.

Wishing you all the best.

 

[mommasita]

Thank you both..

Luv, that brought tears to my eyes.. Very emotional lately.. I hope you are doing well

 

[managerdreamer]

Hug hug! Hang in there. I hope you find out good news. The set back is so disappointing. Praying for you!

 

[lisaviolet]

Mommasita,

Love sent with everything that you are going through and have been. You are an absolute blessing to so many on here.

Here's to a good outcome with the testing.

Will be thinking of you,

Lisa

 

[mommasita]

Thank you everyone

Happy Holidays all around..