My DH is throwing a fit about watching football

[LindaM]

For me it about compromise, there are things that I want to do on vacation that DH doesn't really want to do, but if it makes me happy he is more than willing to go along. Last year we went to wedding in California and my DH and DS are huge football fans, I was able to get them tickets to Raiders game and DD and I went shopping for the day, everybody was happy. We have gone to Disney during the NHL playoffs and yes we did spend a couple or few hours at ESPN so DH and DS both could watch the game, but after that we all enjoyed the park. If your willing to give a little, they will give a little back and you all will enjoy your vacation.

 

[seadd67]

Sorry but this sounds like its more then football!! maybe two of :you need to sit down before the trip. I like football( Seahawks and Washington huskies,both doom and gloom ) and me and my DGF are on sepreat ends here to she hates it, but we do what she likes and do what i like its 50/50 please think of the family to is it worth a Blow up!, good luck enjoy your trip

 

[TifffanyD]

Why don't you turn it into a mother/daughter thing and do something girly? Let the poor man have 4 hours of bliss on his vacation

 

[Donnainnj]

If he has to see the game I would leave DD with DH and go get a facial and a pedicure.

 

[Inignotlover]

The BF and I are Crazy Bears fans. I'm a huge White Sox fan. He's an insane Cubs fan.

I planned this huge surprise party for my bf's birthday. Got all of the family on the horn to get it together and even had tickets and special messages to be read and cakes ordered. It was a show starting at 5. Then I realized, about a month or two in that it was a Night game!!! DOH! I cancelled all of it. When people asked why, all I said was "Bears start at 7 that night." The only answer I ever got was a knowing "Ohh." So we stayed in and I made a big feast for him and we watched the game just the two of us. He said it was the best birthday ever.

The point of my story is this- you know that he's a huge fan. You married him anyways.

You should have known that when you booked it that you had a football sunday in there and if he's willing to go anyways, you should just chin up for a couple of hours until he meets you if you don't want to join him. Nothing to get resentful over. Sorry if that sounds mean, but really, it's 4 hours out of a couple of days or a week long trip.

 

[TheMadScrapper]

OP here....First off thanks for all the input. It's nice to hear another point of view.

Second the whole thing could have been avoided in the first place if he would have told me when I was planning the itinerary that he wanted to work some time in for him to watch the game. He never did. So here I am planning away and thinking that it wasn't an issue and three days before we leave he's asking his fellow Rainder fanatics where he can watch the game in or around WDE area.

Third, I was sincere when I asked if there was somewhere he could watch the game when I originally posted. It wasn't merely to vent. I want everyone to be happy on the trip so if there was a way I was going to work it out but then it dawned on me that we have dining ressies that will conflict with the game that's when I was got stressed.

And after all this

This morning when we got up I asked him what time the game was on so that I could try to work something out. He tells me "don't worry about it" I'm not watching the game. WHaaaa???

Geeze my reply was "no really when is it on?" He wouldn't tell me and said just don't worry about it. I was shocked.

Now I know that part of the reason is that they are having a crappy season and there is no way they're going to the play offs anyway. If they were having an awesome season watching the game for him would be a must.

This issue really goes beyond this one game. It's about years of my football fanatic husband spending every spare minute of his time watching football. Wether it be his team playing or NFL network broadcasting games from 20 years ago. Obviously this is going to be a problem at some point and we got to that point when he tells me that he wants to watch the game when we're about to leave in three days for our first family vacation.

I didn't plan every second of the vacation. I wanted to have the freedom to do what we feel like doing but that day we happen to have dining reservations.

I was sincere in asking if there would be somewhere he could watch the game and yes the truth is that I didn't really want him to watch the game at all but if it had come to it I wasn't going to let anything ruin our vacation memories especially for our DD.

I LOVE Dinsney but being that this is our first vacation ever it would not have been my first choice. *ducks* But my DH and DD didn't want to go the other places I suggested so we're going to WDW because everyone will enjoy that. I am willing to compromise. If not I wouldn't still be married.

And to the poster that said it's like a cult. lol Pretty close. Raider fans are well.....different. For them it seems it's almost more about being part of the "Raider Nation" then it is about the sport.

 

[Colleen27]

Actually, I think you're throwing a fit that your DH isn't giving you total control over "your" vacation. If you're the planner in the family, then you have a duty to make sure everyone has the best vacation possible. Unless everyone in your family has exactly the same taste, you should balance everyone's desires. There is no right way to do Disney.

I'm in the minority here, but, I believe that you should plan around his game. It won't kill you to eat a little later or earlier. Ask yourself how many things that are on your schedule are there primarily for you or DD. Compare that to a WDW vacation you were planning just for him. I'm not saying you have to watch the game too. Just don't punish him for having wants of his own. Would you feel differently if it was a game of golf or a trip to the speedway?

OP, if I've totally misread the situation, then I'm sorry. Please just ignore me. But, if you recognize a kernel of truth, then please show the man some love.

I second this advice. Not being much of a football fan (and *really* not a Pats fan, since they aren't even our home team!), I was a little annoyed when DH asked me to make room in our perfectly planned trip this past January so he could catch the Pats' playoff game while we were there. But really, it is just a few hours and in my DH's case, it was the only request he made for anything over the entire 12 day trip. I couldn't see the sense in making a fuss about it and adding the stress of a ongoing disagreement to our family vacation.

 

[TheMadScrapper]

For those that said I knew he was a fanatic when I married him yes that's true and even though it may not sound like it from my original post I have been more than tolerant of his love of football. Supportive even. I even let him dress me up in Raiders stuff and I go watch the games with him. Have some beers and hang with friends. Trust me my husband is not on a leash. The reason that we have been together all these years is because he gets what he wants and so do I. We would have divorced long ago if I tried to change him or couldn't accept him the way he is and vica versa.

When I was planning I was communicating with him the entire time keeping him posted on everything I was doing and since he didn't say word 1 about watching any football while we were at WDW I didn't think it was an issue and believe it or not I didn't think to ask. I know, I know...but really I didn't. I was so focused on the planning and doing my homework here on the boards that I didn't even think about it.

Also, he agreed to the vacation for the dates I chose and he knew it would be football season and he didn't say a word about it. Why? Who knows. lol

Now he says not to worry about him watching the game or finding somewhere he can but it would not suprise me in the least if Sunday rolls around and he just can't take it. In that event I will take the good advice offered by so many here and just let it go. Point him at ESPN and go on my merry way. It's good advice and like I said in my second post If I wasn't sincere in asking if there was someplace he could watch it I wouldn't have asked.

I don't think I was throwing a fit at all. I was just stressing over it. And I'm done now. It's true it's not worth it.

 

[estherhead]

Just wanted to pop back on (this thread got really passionate, eh?) and say that dh's are like that with vacations. For months you ask them their opinion & they have none. Then as they are throwing the luggage into the back of the car they ask you what the itinerary looks like & get out a red Sharpie to X off all the stuff that doesn't interest them! Obviously, I'm exaggerating, but you know what I mean. There's no consideration that maybe, just maybe, your feelings will be hurt.

With us it isn't just Disney, it's anywhere we choose to go. Dh assumes (rightly so, I'm a big planner) that I will take care of hotels, rental cars, flights, etc. But he doesn't realize that figuring that stuff out means you have to have all the other stuff planned too. Even a rental house at the beach requires thought & planning. Do we need towels? Where is the closest grocery? Should I take spices? Etc. He laughs that it takes me two weeks to pack for anything. Trust me, with a family of five it literally takes me two weeks to clean, launder, and plan how to best pack this family up.

You've obviously been married awhile, you know the drill. Have fun. He'll be fine about 3 days in. He'll finally just let go and realize you were right all along & it isn't worth questioning.

 

[Twitterpated Dad]

OP, thank you for your last two posts. It's obvious that you get it. And, everyone is entitled to vent sometime. I for one am sorry that I reacted so strongly.

 

[goodferry]

That is so true, my DH is the same way. Plan a trip for an entire year "what do you want to do, anything you want to see, anything that needs planned?" on the plane ride down "So, are we going to La Nouba this trip?" They will drive you crazy!
BTW, it's a one o'clock game, so make your alternate plans just in case.

 

[TheMadScrapper]

OP, thank you for your last two posts. It's obvious that you get it. And, everyone is entitled to vent sometime. I for one am sorry that I reacted so strongly.

I don't think you reacted too strong. Hearing everyones opinion has really helped me to relax about it all. Now I am just looking forward to going and having a great time! I have been packing since yesterday and I'm getting really excited!!

 

[Belleandtinker]

After reading all these posts, I'm not sure if WWS has a location for FB watching. We are going to be in WDW during the Super Bowl and know that EPSN will be packed and packed early. We are looking for a location (besides our room) that the game will be on. Any ideas?

 

[jblrn2b]

OP, I live with a DH who is OCD with football and lacrosse and two boys who have become the same - my DH also coaches both sports and man what a great coach he is!!! I grew up on football, volunteer for Pop Warner (my dad taught me the game and took me as a kid to Broncos games) and also love the sport. Does that mean I want to spend 24 hours a day with it? - No. Does it mean I will watch a football game on vaca? Maybe. I can understand your frustration. If that was me, I would go shopping during that time.

Oh so sorry honey - I had to have all those things while you were watching the game>

Enjoy your new treasures!!!!!!!!

 

[bytheblood]

Tell him to go back to the room and watch while you and your kiddo play.

 

[Boardwalker]

Just wanted to pop back on (this thread got really passionate, eh?) and say that dh's are like that with vacations. For months you ask them their opinion & they have none. Then as they are throwing the luggage into the back of the car they ask you what the itinerary looks like & get out a red Sharpie to X off all the stuff that doesn't interest them!

Ut-oh. Are you married to my husband too? White hair, mustache, walks with a limp?

 

[TheGoofster]

Also, he agreed to the vacation for the dates I chose and he knew it would be football season and he didn't say a word about it. Why? Who knows. lol

As a man, let me give you a little insight into how our brains work (or in cases such as these - don't work).
I don't know how many times my wife has planned something, and she asks me if such and such is an ok time to do it. I say "sure". She repeats the date and time to me - again I say "sure". She has me repeat the date and time back to her - again no problem. So the thing is planned. Now, on one side of my brain, I realize that we are supposed to do such and such on this date and time. On the other side of my brain, I know that the big game is also on at exactly the same date and time. The problem is that all too often those two sides of my brain don't get together for a chat until a couple of hours before the even takes place. Suddenly, at the last minute it hits me like a bolt of thunder "Did you plan this event for this time?" I'll ask her. Yeah, and you said that it was OK. "But the big game is on!". Yeah, but you said it was OK. "Yeah, but the big game is on". BUT YOU SAID IT WAS OK!!! "I know I did, BUT THE BIG GAME IS ON!!!!!!"
We don't necessarily MEAN to cause a problem, but sometimes event A and event B just don't register at the same time.
I hope this helps a little in understanding perhaps why your hubby might have said OK to those dates, even though he "knew" that it was Football Day. It probably just didn't click that the two events were going to juxtaposition at the same time.

 

[luvthemouse71]

Another vote here for cutting your DH some slack...a game lasts a few hours at most and like another person said, it's his vacation too. It doesn't matter if his team sucks or not...his team is important to him as I'm sure certain things are important to you. Why not take that time to do something with DD?

I'm biased though because I'm that rare breed, a straight woman who really loves football(baseball too. ). I'd be watching my team play also. I guess I don't see the value in fighting him about this when like I mentioned before, we're talking 2-3 hours out of your vacation.

 

[uicbear]

Have a great time at the World.

 

[MichelleVW]

I'm biased though because I'm that rare breed, a straight woman who really loves football(baseball too. ).

Are woman that love sports all that rare??? Because every female in my family loves football and I'm raising my DD's to love football too! My proudest moment was when I walked in the house and DD15 was alone WATCHING THE OHIO STATE GAME ON TV!!! I knew right then and there that I was doing a good job as a mother!!

I have plenty of straight girlfriends that I talk football with too.