Moving to pay off debt and perhaps the house?

[Doodlebug939]

First off let me say that I am a military wife and so we have moved just about every 4 years for the past twelve. My husband is up for orders again and this time we are trying to find a place that we can afford a house. For example, if we move to Jacksonville Flordia there is no way that I would be able to buy a house. The market is very tight in the area by the base and homes have really shot up in the past 4 years. And if we moved to Fort Worth, TX (My favorite so far) then we could afford a new construction for under 150,000 which is my personal cap on a house. (I want to enjoy my home and not be swollowed up in the payments). So we are looking to be stationed somewhere so we can finally be homeowners after 12 years of renting.

And as for family, we have been away for so long that we are fine with some distance. We both love both of our families but we are always just a plane ticket away and we have unlimited long distance. I realize that it is not the same as having family right down the road. But my husband and I are the babies of each of our families and even though we are in our 30's we are still treated that way.

 

[vegasnative]

We have thought....should say we are still thinking about doing this very thing. We are thinking about "cashing out" so to speak, on our house and moving to someplace where housing costs are cheaper, but also someplace where it is not as busy as where we live now. My problem is, I am the only child, my parents live 6 miles from us, my kids are their only grandkids and I know they would be very sad if we moved. So, family is the only thing stopping us so far. Some say "they make airplanes for a reason", to me, it's not that easy.

Question for both dzneymom and DawnM, how was it going from the West to the East? I have lived my entire life here in the West, and we are considering moving to TN (Knoxville area). What was hard about the change/transition? What do you like better as opposed to the west coast area? What do you miss the most about the west coast area?

 

[Caitsmama]

I just wanted to add, if we were not close to our family's, then heck ya, i would move!! Like i said, i just wouldn't do it now, because i am lucky enough to be very close to my family , and my inlaws.. and we all live within 20min of each other.

 

[dznymom3]

VEGASNATIVE~For us, the biggest changes were with the weather. We were not used to humidity and bugs. This is our second summer here and we are getting used to the humidity. We have found that the people here in South Carolina are so much friendlier than in California. I don't know how that would compare to other areas on the east coast. Also, we miss all of the really fresh produce we could get in California and good Mexican food. But, those are small sacrifices and we feel we gained so much more. THe slower pace of life, friendly neighbors and not stressing about the mortgage payment are so worth the move!! PM me if you would like.

 

[vellamint]

Thank you! You understand probably more than anybody why we moved. So many people are leaving the Island, its a shame.

Living on Long Island too......just not lucky enough to have a spouse that agrees with me (and you) about the cost of living. All we do is work to support the house and there is nothing left over every month. EVERYTHING is so sky-hi in price I hate it. Actually starting to think I will eventually just leave by myself - tired of this rat race (JK - not JK - lol). I have friends in Florida and would like to check it out....maybe a nice little condo or something....

 

[Cinderpals]

Yes!!! I've thought about this many times over the past 3 years. My parents have passed away, my In-laws are on the other coast anyway, my Sis and her family live in California and my Brother-in-law live out West too. So, we're free to move wherever we want to. We currently live in a very competitive, environment. People are always in a hurry, and everything is constantly moving, well, except for traffic. We've been fortunate that we were able to buy stuff before it went out of control. I get to stay at home, but I'm looking for someway to make money from home just to keep my brain alive. I'm sick of volunteering!! I've done my time...even saying that, I still manage to volunteer my time...that will never change.

I just wanted to move 40 minutes from here where you can get some land and built a nice size, but manageable house for less than what we could sell our house for....it would be very nice to do that. I'm looking to move down, just to have less house to maintain. I don't like having to clean 4 1/2 bathrooms, guest rooms that don't get used etc...We live in a family oriented neighborhood & my husbands commute time is 7 minutes door to bldg!! We don't need to send our two children to private schools, eventhough, I'm constantly evaluating them. Schools are top rated, incomes are fairly good...I like the parks, recreation activities, free museums etc...there is a lot that goes on here...We've made some nice friends, but not tied down to live here at all. We do have a house in a mountain/lake community that is close enough to go to often. It's very peaceful there!! I could see us moving there when my oldest goes to college! That would be nice

I could see why people would look to do that now...Life's too short not to live where you can work/live stress free. There are many beautiful, affordable places to live in this country.

 

[mt2]

First off let me say that I am a military wife and so we have moved just about every 4 years for the past twelve. My husband is up for orders again and this time we are trying to find a place that we can afford a house. For example, if we move to Jacksonville Flordia there is no way that I would be able to buy a house. The market is very tight in the area by the base and homes have really shot up in the past 4 years. And if we moved to Fort Worth, TX (My favorite so far) then we could afford a new construction for under 150,000 which is my personal cap on a house. (I want to enjoy my home and not be swollowed up in the payments). So we are looking to be stationed somewhere so we can finally be homeowners after 12 years of renting.

And as for family, we have been away for so long that we are fine with some distance. We both love both of our families but we are always just a plane ticket away and we have unlimited long distance. I realize that it is not the same as having family right down the road. But my husband and I are the babies of each of our families and even though we are in our 30's we are still treated that way.

I could have written this.

Our families live in Houston while we are in Ft Worth. We are 4 1/2 hrs away but it seems the roads only go in one direction, North. They can never come to see us but will drive to Austin (4 hrs from Houston) to see Blue's Clues. Family is important to my IL's only when it benifits them. When we lived 1 mile away they were always too busy to see their grandDD's. You'll be there after the movie, church, or swimming. Well we weren't. DH was transfered.

MIL told my DH that he should be humble and take a lesser paying job to be with "the family". He told her that he was with his family. His wife and 3 children.

We are much happier being away from "the family" (both sides. mine are far from perfect). We are taking care of "our family".

 

[kinntj]

We did move from California to Michigan to be closer to family. It really eased the stress of house payment, but we don't see family much more than we did when we lived across the country. My IL's live 15 minutes from us, but I don't like them enough to go out of my way. My parents still live a 10 hour drive, so we only take that trip once a year while the kids are young.

I would say overall the move was a good thing. At this point we would only sell our current house if we had to. The market stinks in this area right now and it would take a very long time to sell it. Not worth the hassle at this time. I'm thinking at least 5 years in this house at least. We would love to retire in a nice affordable area in a decent sized ranch for kids to come visit.

I would definately take a long time to decide on when to sell for the sake of being debt free and living close to family. Selling a house is a huge undertaking and both times we did it, DH's companies paid for packing, moving and transferring (even the commissions of realtors).

 

[golden1]

I've considered this. We live in suburban MA and our house payment plus the general cost of living makes it really hard to live here on just one income. I have very little discretionary income and everytime my DH gets a raise, the property taxes go up or something else happens so it seems like it is impossible to get ahead. Until I go back to work, we are living really close to the edge. Part of me would love to move to NH or southern Maine where I could get a much nicer house for much less $$$$. However, my parents and DH's parents live here and we are really close with my ILs. I would really hate to move away.

 

[ceecee]

My nephew got married and got a job offer in another state and they moved, they have since had a baby and they both really want to come home. The cost of living is moderate around here, but he is making $30,000 more a year where he is and the housing cost is pretty compariable. He is still checking for jobs in Ohio because with the baby they really want to come home. (And of course we would love it). So for some people it works and for others it doesn't. There is something to be said for family support.

 

[MEM]

We did this exact thing for many reasons. Housing was one of the reasons, but not the sole reason. Being around to watch my child grow up was one of the main reasons. People in this area thought it was interesting enough that we had a newspaper article written about it. Here is the link:

http://www.democratandchronicle.com.../20050626/SPECIALS0701/506260325/0/SPECIALS07

Neat article, but what the heck is a "white hot"??? You said you would not eat one??

 

[Christypl]

We did it.
We lived in central fl and owned a beautiful home. The military moved us to Hawaii and we couldnt afford to buy anything decent. Although it was a great place and we would have loved to retire there unless we lived in our car we could not. So we moved back to central FL only to find houses had gone sky high. We just bought a great house in north Ga.

 

[ForTheLoveofDisney]

I could have written this.

Our families live in Houston while we are in Ft Worth. We are 4 1/2 hrs away but it seems the roads only go in one direction, North. They can never come to see us but will drive to Austin (4 hrs from Houston) to see Blue's Clues. Family is important to my IL's only when it benifits them. When we lived 1 mile away they were always too busy to see their grandDD's. You'll be there after the movie, church, or swimming. Well we weren't. DH was transfered.

MIL told my DH that he should be humble and take a lesser paying job to be with "the family". He told her that he was with his family. His wife and 3 children.

We are much happier being away from "the family" (both sides. mine are far from perfect). We are taking care of "our family".

I'm so glad you posted on this thread. I smiled when I read that last part about "We are taking care of 'our family'." The #1 reason that would keep me here would be my family if we could be closer in a family sort of way (we're already close mile wise). DH's ready to be gone! But, try as I might I feel like I'm always on the outside for everything! Without going into too much detail it is evident that it really isn't ever going to be that way and like you in regards to your ILs "You'll be there after movie, church, or swimming" I'll always get whatever's left and if it is convenient. If it doesn't interfere with any other plans they might already have. Whatever, it is what it is and I've tried my best to go above and beyond to fix it but I can only do so much on my end. And quite frankly after the rude awakening I had this weekend I'm feeling pretty much over "stay for the sake of family" . But, I'm digressing...
Anyway, several times I've brought up to my DH about staying because of the family and he has said very sincerely and heartfelt that to him we are the family. Just he and I. And "our" family and taking care of our family is the only family that matters! For some time I did not think that it could be enough, just he and I but truly I believe it could be.

And I've seen several posts on here from military families and I must admit I have smidgen of envy. So many times I think it would be easier if we had to go where we were sent. I know that is a crazy notion I'm sure but just the thought that we didn't have a choice and then the result that I've seen from some is once they are out of the military they aren't afraid to go live somewhere else that they'd really love to call home because they've already done it their whole military career and they have the confidence to do it.

 

[Va-bear]

After 15 years of being all over, I moved home with my hubby and kids in tow and am thankful every single day. I lived all over for different reasons - school, jobs, etc.... but moved back to where my sisters and parents lived a few years ago. I worried that my husband might not like it, or that we'd wish we had a bigger house, better job, or whatever. But, boy, you can't replace family - as we sat around the grill watching the kids in the sprinkler last night I reminded myself that again. To have my boys grow up with their cousin, grandmother, aunts has been the best thing ever. I would have said I wasn't that "into" family a few years ago....and really, my sisters and I aren't that crazy kind of close... but I am glad I did it for my sons. People just aren't togehter with their extended families liket they used to be and I can't help but think they will benefit by being near theirs. Maybe I could have been a "bigger" scientist elsewhere but that's ok I'll just be an ok scientist here with really happy kids who know there granmothers favorite kind of icecream!

 

[Va-bear]

Maybe I should throw in that I have a very nice family that I enjoy seeing and vice versa. (WE could never live near my husbands family! ) So, you have to decide on a case to case basis. Good luck to all!

 

[giasmom]

We are doing this right now, we actually just closed on our home today. We live in Northern Virginia and have/had a 1900 SF town home that we bought 3 years ago for $235K. We have a DD and want another one but don't feel there is enough room in our house for a 2nd child. I also didn't want to work when we have our next baby, and we couldn't afford our mortgage and 2 kids on DH salary alone. We ended up selling our home for $400K, with the money we made we were able to put a huge down payment on a 3,100 SF home in Richmond VA, pay off all our dept except for one car, and I can now be a stay at home mom.

My family is in NY so we are now 2 hours farther away from them so we ended up sacrificing being farther away. But now I won't have to work anymore and I'll be able to stay home with my babies.

Very well worth it for us.

 

[*Flower*]

We did this exact thing for many reasons. Housing was one of the reasons, but not the sole reason. Being around to watch my child grow up was one of the main reasons. People in this area thought it was interesting enough that we had a newspaper article written about it. Here is the link:

http://www.democratandchronicle.com.../20050626/SPECIALS0701/506260325/0/SPECIALS07

Great article- and congratulations!

 

[*Flower*]

We moved from California to South Carolina a year and a half ago. One of our deciding factors in the move was cheaper housing. We were able to buy twice as much house as we had in California for a lot less than California. We also wanted a slower pace of life to raise our kids. I am able to stay at home here and I was not able to do that in California. We miss the weather in California but not the hectic pace.

Where did you move from- and where are you now?

Just curious....

I'm from SoCal and live here too.

Welcome!

 

[DawnM]

I am not the poster you quoted but we moved to Charlotte, NC from Pasadena, CA. We owned a 1,400 sq. ft house there on .16 of an acre. It sold for $600,000. We bought a 3500 sq. ft. house on 2.5 acres here for a little over 1/2 of that.

The hard thing is we feel like with the cost of living there we can never move back unless we want to both work full time and have the kids in full time school and after school care.

Dawn

Where did you move from- and where are you now?

Just curious....

I'm from SoCal and live here too.

Welcome!

 

[Steamboat Marti]

Neat article, but what the heck is a "white hot"??? You said you would not eat one??

It is a "white" hot dog -- god only knows what goes into it, but it doesn't taste like anything else I've ever had. And people here go NUTZ for it! They love it - yuch! Just a prime example of how things are different in your new neighborhood!