Mom dragged kid by backpack harness!

[amybippy]

I pretty much had to use a leash thingie when my son was little. He was just too active and too friendly. He would wander away from us at every opportunity, and would walk up to complete strangers in malls, stores, zoos, etc...The leash allowed him the freedom to walk on his own, which he was very insistent on, and it allowed me the security of knowing he was within my eyesight all the time. I never dragged him anywhere, and he was never treated like a dog. It was a useful tool for a mother with an active, curious child. Oh, and with my daughter, I didn't have to use it at all. I guess it just depends on the kid.

 

[OceanAnnie]

Does anyone know the age of the child?

I was wondering about that too. He looked bigger than a toddler to me, but the clip was fuzzy. His legs seemed to be long, (folded up while being dragged ) and his body appeared rather large for a toddler. I don't know.

Sad. Awful sight. Bewildering to see.

 

[MarkBarbieri]

We never used leashes with our kids. Instead, we wore coveralls made of velcro. That way we could just stick the kids to us when we got into crowds.

 

[paintnolish]

Used properly, I don't have a problem with the leashes.

Of course, dragging your kid through the store isn't proper use.

I'd be interested to know what transpired prior to that...was she a mother at the end of her rope & did something REALLY stupid after having dealt with a kid who had been a brat all day or is there a history of abuse & poor parenting????

Stupid, stupid parent, maybe in need of some counseling, but it does not appear to be a felony! Unless, of course, this is indicative of another larger problem, like physical or mental abuse.

 

[luvmy3]

I know that there are people on here who use harnesses and they love them, but I hate them with a passion. It's a child, not an animal. If they are having a temper tantrum and wouldn't walk on their own, pick the child up and carry them out of the store, go directly to your car, secure the child in their seat and go home.

Its sounds fine in therory but not always as simple as that. I'm sure the mom that I know who was putting her child into his carseat while he was a having a temper tantrum wished it was. Too bad for her that some do-gooder called the cops with her plate number and CPS showd up at 11PM to wake up all her kids and check them over and interview them. Turns out nothing was brought of it except their family is on file with CPS now
Sorry, I know its a little OT.

 

[MarkBarbieri]

Its sounds fine in therory but not always as simple as that. I'm sure the mom that I know who was putting her child into his carseat while he was a having a temper tantrum wished it was. Too bad for her that some do-gooder called the cops with her plate number and CPS showd up at 11PM to wake up all her kids and check them over and interview them. Turns out nothing was brought of it except their family is on file with CPS now
Sorry, I know its a little OT.

I've been there - minus the CPS involvement. My oldest had a raging tantrum when we decided that he'd played with the trains at Toys R Us long enough. I decided that he was beyond reason, so I quietly picked him up, carried him to the car, and buckled him in. It was before he knew how to unbuckle, so it was very effective. I'm sure that a clueless non-parent (you know those 20 year olds that have never even babysat but know everything about how you should raise your kids) would have assumed that I was doing something horrible.

 

[tazdev3225]

I use a harness for my DGS and I have gotten some looks and nasty comments. I really don't care I will continue to use it. I watch my 3 grandkids during the day and they are 8 months, 3 and 5. The 3 y/o is a runner. His mother and I both chased him in a parking lot because he is a FAST runner. I have also had him pull away and get into the middle of a busy intersection before I could catch him. If a harness can keep him close to me and safe then I will use it. I also used one on his mother when she was his age because she was a wanderer. I would use a dog leash if I the need arose to keep him safe. I do it because I love him too much for harm to come to him.

 

[Stacerita]

I knew this story would be on the DIS when I read about it.

I did not need to use a leash or harness for my DD, but I have seen many families who did and it worked great for them. They had runners.

What this mother did was wrong. She dragged her child. Its not the leash/harness that is the issue, it is how she used it. She could have dragged him with a shirt or by the arm, and it would have been wrong. Not that she did it with the leash/harness.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I know that there are people on here who use harnesses and they love them, but I hate them with a passion. It's a child, not an animal. If they are having a temper tantrum and wouldn't walk on their own, pick the child up and carry them out of the store, go directly to your car, secure the child in their seat and go home.

We used a harness when hiking and at WDW with our youngest. His impulse control was nil and he was a runner. Sorry, but I was more concerned with his safety than with someone thinking we were treating him like an animal.

 

[EMom]

Perhaps you enjoy watching the screaming fool of a parent who lost their child in a store because they weren't using a leash( not the reason I use my. I have always taught my kids to never leave my side and they always listen)? I AM SO SICK OF HEARING THAT THESE ONLY BELONG ON DOGS. They can be used responsibly and with purpose,

In the 50s, my mother had my brother (then a toddler) downtown shopping. The stores open right on to the streets. He bolted and ran from her and she gave chase, but was not quick enough. Just as he made it to the street and was about to run in front of a car, someone snatched him up and stopped him from becoming a grease spot. After that, my mother decided that his tendency to bolt and run was too dangerous for his own good and she bought a leash. Back then, they weren't kid leashes, but actual DOG leashes. She put it around his waist.

Through the years, whenever he would mutter that leashes only belonged on dogs, she would roll her eyes, point in his direction and say, "Well, at least he's still alive, isn't he?"

She didn't need it for any of the rest of us. He was the only escapee with running tendencies.

 

[JessicaR]

If this woman thought this was appropriate behavior in public, I hate to imagine what she does behind closed doors.
She has obvious issues. I hope this served as a wake up call.

 

[tonilea]

Of course, the woman in the clip used the harness in a way it was never intended. However, I do see the need for them.

DS was a runner and good heavens, was he quick. We always used one at our local theme park. I forgot it one day and we didn't take the stroller. Poor DS had bruises on his arm the next day. I felt terrible! I would much rather him wear a harness, than have bruises where he tried to pull away and I tried to hang on!

 

[quentina]

Perhaps you enjoy watching the screaming fool of a parent who lost their child in a store because they weren't using a leash( not the reason I use my. I have always taught my kids to never leave my side and they always listen)? I AM SO SICK OF HEARING THAT THESE ONLY BELONG ON DOGS. They can be used responsibly and with purpose,

I agree, I have 3 kids and my youngest has no sense of danger/fear. He is very fast. I will not risk him being hit by a car because he just doesn't grasp what we are trying to teach him. I will say, that I do not let him walk loose, he has to hold hands even with the safety band on.

For my first 2 kids, I never used them and looked down on the parents who did.

Now, I feel different, I will not take the chance with his safety. Once he understands, I will stop.

 

[Mickey527]

I saw the clip and while I don't think it was right, we really don't know the whole story. I bet it would be different if there was sound.
I raised 3 boys myself and although I didn't have them on leashes there were times when I had to grab a wrist and practically drag them out of the store. I just never got caught on video.
Imagine if this was the case:
"Come on darling sweetheart I have to go"
"No, I am playing this game"
"If you don't come now I will drag you out"
"Ok try it" and little Johnny falls to the floor
Mom drags him to prove a point, never thinking someone would catch it on their video phone.
"Ha Ha mom, that was fun, do it again"

My grandson had one of those backpacks with the leash on it during a Disney trip only because my nephew bought one for his son and Nicky wanted one too. I don't think my son ever used the leash and it finally got stolen from our stroller when we parked and went on Small World.

 

[hornedfrog]

Horrible.

I am a single mom of a 3-year-old and a 4-year-old. My eldest is a runner. I am no saint. But I would never put a harness on her. I am her mother. She WILL (and does usually) mind me because I mean business. I do not have the time or energy for a harness or for nagging for her to 'be a good girl and mind'. There are consequences (timeouts, loss of priviledges that she prizes as the big-sister, etc). I know what works. It works. No leash.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Horrible.

I am a single mom of a 3-year-old and a 4-year-old. My eldest is a runner. I am no saint. But I would never put a harness on her. I am her mother. She WILL (and does usually) mind me because I mean business. I do not have the time or energy for a harness or for nagging for her to 'be a good girl and mind'. There are consequences (timeouts, loss of priviledges that she prizes as the big-sister, etc). I know what works. It works. No leash.

Good. It works for your child. Didn't work for mine. Or, I should say for one of mine. I never had to use one for my oldest.

 

[Sparx]

I used a little leash thing on my DD when she was two. It had a little vest and the leash was attached to the back. I was a single mom trying to shop and didn't want her to wander off. Of course, I never dragged her by it. I don't think the problem is with the leash. The problem is with the parent and how she used it.

 

[disfan07]

Horrible.

I am a single mom of a 3-year-old and a 4-year-old. My eldest is a runner. I am no saint. But I would never put a harness on her. I am her mother. She WILL (and does usually) mind me because I mean business. I do not have the time or energy for a harness or for nagging for her to 'be a good girl and mind'. There are consequences (timeouts, loss of priviledges that she prizes as the big-sister, etc). I know what works. It works. No leash.

Wow...what a perfect parent you must be
I don't have kids yet but i see absolutely nothing wrong with these if they are used PROPERLY
The people i babysit for have 4 kids...they never had to use a harness on teh older 3 becasue they weren't as impulsive and not quite as stubborn. Their youngest though...wow.
I went with the 4 kids and their mom to kings dominion back in june and we brought a stroller but yes...we used a harness. He wasnt even 2 yet but was not too fond of his stroller either. He is USUALLY pretty good at holding our hand but sometimes he needs the freedom and he does run...fast. He had also never been in a place that big with that many people before so we were really afraid he would bolt quickly. Turns out, he walked with us pretty well and when he got tired he would sleep in his stroller but the harness was useful when he wanted to walk and it was crowded
I'm going to WDW with them next year and he will be just shy of his 3rd birthday....as of now, we plan of having it just in case...that might change by next year, who knows.

Not everyones kids are as "perfect" as you make yours seem to be and there is no right for you to judge people who do use them to keep their kids safe if they choose to.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I have no issue with harnesses and after working in Fantasyland, my children will be using one! Fantasyland is lost child (excuse me, lost parent) capitol of the world. I saw so many "good kids who would never do this" wander off. They are on stimulation overload and wander away very easily. I have literally seen kids get lost who were holding their parents hand (the kid stops because htey see something and the parent does not realize that they are not there any more.) It's no fun for anybody. The preschool I worked at would use it for the two year olds when we would walk to hte river overlook. They loved it! They didn't have to hold our hands, and we loved it because we could take them as a group without ever worrying that one would wander off.

When used the right way, they can be a lifesaver for parents and children- literally!

 

[AllyandJack]

I have 3 kids all 2 and under. I had my DD on a leash today. I have no problem using the term leash, but it was, technically, a backpack harness. I held her hand, but had the leash part wrapped around my wrist just in case.

We were all walking around downtown with typical city traffic. I had my 2 younger ones in my double stroller.

I'll be blunt....unless you have 3 kids all under 2, you have no right to judge how a parent manages alone. You haven't been the parent struggling to carry a huge diaper bag (my diaper bag weighs 16lbs because I have 3 in diapers), push a double stroller one-handed, and praying to God your just-turned-2-yr-old doesn't dart off after that really cool truck she just saw and yelled "TRUCK!" with a giddy smile on her face, amazed with all of the
moving cars (we live in the country and this was her first trip to the big city).

I would never drag her, obviously. I also wouldn't drag her without the leash - dragging is never a viable option.

But, unless you've BTDT, you can't judge. I guess you can shoot me a dirty look as you stand there either childless or with your 1 child or with your 2 children, or with your kids who are older or have more of an age spacing, etc. But, unless you've had a 2yr old, a 14mo old, and a 2mo old, a 16lb diaper bag, and had to cross busy city streets all by yourself, you can keep the judging to yourself.

There's that old saying....I was a great parent, until I had kids. I was also set in certain ways when I had my ONE child. Views change drastically when you're juggling 3 kids 2 and under and you're on your own in the city with cars flying by.

It also results in a massive migraine, but that's another issue!