Wowee - thanks for all the ideas and votes guys!
Is it really so bad to look dated in your pictures? I was looking at a picture from my grandparents 1943 wedding today, and everything about it - from her gown to their hairstyles to her flowers and the car they were in date them, but it is an AMAZING classic 1940's picture. I also LOVE my parents' early 70's wedding photos. So as long as you look and feel amazing, who cares about being dated. Although, I don't think I would be saying this if we were in the mid 80's.
What color would you wear?
HIGH-larious!! OK, you make a good point - as long as the outfit looks... not ridiculous... it doesn't matter if it echoes the era. I would *love* to look as glamorous as your grandmother must've looked!
Colorwise, it's a toss-up between white and turquoise. I look better in turquoise, but white, of course, looks more bridal and maybe less Moulin Rouge...
Maybe you can post a photo of your necklace.
I really like this "fascinator" option that you have found. I am wearing a flower in my hair. But I am wearing a veil during the ceremony and then taking it off. As much as I don't like what a veil stands for, for some reason I didn't feel like a bride without it. Anyway, maybe having a flower would look less trendy or dated? Just an idea.
I do have a "real-touch" gardenia that was the first hair accessory I bought. It is really neat, but I think it needs something more - another flower or feathers or rhinestones or something. I can't wait to see pics from your wedding!
Here's the necklace I want - my friend is pretty sure it's made of chandelier crystals, so we're going to try to make one:
The fourth one is my favourite.. and I don't think that that particular one will ever look dated. Fascinators are really big over here in England at the moment, and are much more popular now than wearing a traditional type of hat at a wedding! I love them... You can get such unusual and flamboyant designs but I think the fourth one you chose looks really quite classic! Have a look on good old ebay... there are always loads of them on the UK ebay site
Thanks for the UK eBay tip - I'm surfing it right now! I actually had this epiphany while looking at a British wedding magazine. It's one that's all about flowers, but it had some weddings in it, and this one bride wore a gorgeous gray Edwardian suit with a giant fascinator. I thought "I wanna look that good!"
OK Lurky you have just made me laugh so hard because, yes I now have one of those snarky teen daughters who has made fun of my 80's dress with the shoulder pads!!!!! I paid a small fotune to have it preserved so someday my daughter would love it too and want to wear it!!!!! But no she has asked me to CUT a piece of it off to put inside her gown with a pin. Yep just wants me to take the scissors to my beatiful Eve of Milady Dynasty era gown!!
No I really want her to have her own gown to wear on her day (because what goes around comes around) HAHAHHA!
Any yes sadly my dress still turned yellow in spite of "The whole being Preserved thing"
OMG - you totally have to post a picture of your dress!
And thanks for the heads up on the gown preservation - I'd heard it was a ripoff....
here are huge necklaces found on swarovski...they are slightly pricey, ranging from $300ish-520...
a quick look on ebay found this one
http://cgi.ebay.com/Swarovski-Cryst...oryZ2748QQrdZ1QQssPageNameZWD1VQQcmdZViewItem
Those are gorgeous, Caryn - thanks! I never even thought about Swarovski. I think I'll look on eBay some more....
i forgot to vote...i like #3, doesn't it match your colors? it's very different, which is what i like...
Yes! Turquoise! Unfortunately they say it's out of stock right now, but I've emailed to see when they'll have it again. I love "different" too!
I also like the idea of wearing two different ones for the ceremony and reception. I can't afford to be a two-dress bride like in all the magazines, but maybe I can be a two-fascinator bride! 
Grrrr.... 
