Love can be equal, but is it?

[Pakey]

Our children are grown but I'd still absolutely save the child before my husband.

But I'm not asking the kids if they'd save me over their dad.

 

[Aisling]

I'd save my child, not because I love her more, but because it is my duty to protect her. And if I were the one hanging from the cliff with her, I would expect my husband to do the same thing.

 

[Aisling]

Originally Posted by abdmom View Post
Having lost my dh (but not a child), I know what life is like without him. Knowing what I know now, if I had the choice, I would save dh. I have oth

Aw, MM27, try not to judge. I almost choked when I read that, but you know what, we all have to do what we have to do.

I know I could not save DH over any of my children, as much as I love him. But different people have different feelings.

 

[Va-bear]

I would throw my DH under the bus for my children; he would throw me under the same bus; we would both willingly jump in front of that bus for our children. That's called being a parent. I love my DH because I KNOW that he puts my children first!

This is my answer. I wouldn't even think twice, we already know kids first forever.

 

[MickeySP]

My DS is grown and my DH is an ex - so why we would be hanging cliffside I don't know


But child first, if it was my DGD - her first, my DS next. My xDH would do the same or I would kill him

 

[rodeo65]

I would save my child. I would much rather deal with the pain of living without my spouse and having my children grow up without a father, than have to live with the pain of my children never growing up at all. My husband would choose the same. I am charged with protecting my children. I'm their mother, it's my job. If I had to throw myself off of the cliff to save them, I would. It's my job. Some people might think they have or can have more children, but you know I can find another husband and father for my children if I had to. Not saying oh, whatever, he's replaceable, not at all. He's no more replaceable than either one of my children are. I love them all dearly, but it's couldn't neglect my parental duty to save my spouse.

ITA!!! Plus DH is a strong guy - if he was hanging cliffside with one of our children, before it would be me trying to pull them up, he'd be pushing for all he's worth with one hand while hanging on with the other.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Our children are grown but I'd still absolutely save the child before my husband.

But I'm not asking the kids if they'd save me over their dad.

And the dogs before the kids.

 

[mhsjax]

Wow. I'm not judging you and I am very sorry for your loss, but this is so foreign to me.

Not really that foreign, there have been other people, one who actually wrote an article on the same thing.

What is really foreign to me is these weird polls, Don't you people have anything better to do other than sit around and ask people who do you love more or who would you save first, that is foreign and really just disturbing.

 

[powellrj]

OK, I am wondering who the other person is who would throw themselves over the cliff before they could ever chose.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Not really that foreign, there have been other people, one who actually wrote an article on the same thing.

What is really foreign to me is these weird polls, Don't you people have anything better to do other than sit around and ask people who do you love more or who would you save first, that is foreign and really just disturbing.

I guess you missed the "to me" part.

Don't you have anything better to do than to ask if we have anything better to do?

Sorry it disturbs you so much. I've been sick the past few days and have spent a lot of time on the Dis.

I enjoy people and hearing all about their thoughts, etc. I don't see how that's really very disturbing.

 

[Magpie]

I guess you missed the "to me" part.

Don't you have anything better to do than to ask if we have anything better to do?

Sorry it disturbs you so much. I've been sick the past few days and have spent a lot of time on the Dis.

I enjoy people and hearing all about their thoughts, etc. I don't see how that's really very disturbing.

Me, too. Sorry to hear you weren't feeling well!

 

[mhsjax]

I guess you missed the "to me" part.

Don't you have anything better to do than to ask if we have anything better to do?

Sorry it disturbs you so much. I've been sick the past few days and have spent a lot of time on the Dis.

I enjoy people and hearing all about their thoughts, etc. I don't see how that's really very disturbing.

Wow defensive much? I was just letting you know that her thought wasn't that strange. I didn't say I agreed or disagreed with it, you assumed that. Also, yeah I do have something better to do, but like the rest of you I was just wandering around, and yes I do find this thread kind of strange, again you didn't start it, so why so defensive?

It isn't the thoughts that are disturbing, it is the question, I mean really who sits around and thinks up these things.

And sorry you have been sick, but really what does this and to do with that?

 

[bumbershoot]

It's not about love. It's a triage situation.

I agree.

My child is an adult now. If he and Mrs. Tex were hanging on that cliff, I'd grab both of them. And hang on. And hang on. And hang on. Until someone showed up who could help, or they dragged me down with them.

But would you want your wife to do that if YOU were hanging there? Or would you prefer that she save herself and your adult child? Because in your situation, you're almost certainly ALL going to die (the stranger that appears will have the strength to pull all 3 of you to safety???). Wouldn't it be better that 2 of you survive?

I would much rather deal with the pain of living without my spouse and having my children grow up without a father, than have to live with the pain of my children never growing up at all.

Yes.

Although, having been through the searing pain of losing my way-too-young mom and knowing how much it devastated me, I sometimes think about it all. Would I rather die, leaving my son to have the death of his mother on his mind forever more? Would I rather let him die, so that I would take on that horrendous pain of losing a child? But if I let him die, then he doesn't get to have a life. And is that better or worse than the emotional pain?

etc etc. My brain thinks too much, I tell you....

 

[cornflake]

That question isn't about love, it's about the biological imperative.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Me, too. Sorry to hear you weren't feeling well!

Thank you. You, too!

 

[cruisnfamily]

Wow, I feel a little bad now because there is no way I would save a stranger (child or not) over DH.

Me too, lol!

What is really foreign to me is these weird polls, Don't you people have anything better to do other than sit around and ask people who do you love more or who would you save first, that is foreign and really just disturbing.

See, now I think this is a great topic, very interesting. So I'm glad it was posted!

 

[Liberty Belle]

Wow defensive much? I was just letting you know that her thought wasn't that strange. I didn't say I agreed or disagreed with it, you assumed that. Also, yeah I do have something better to do, but like the rest of you I was just wandering around, and yes I do find this thread kind of strange, again you didn't start it, so why so defensive?

It isn't the thoughts that are disturbing, it is the question, I mean really who sits around and thinks up these things.

And sorry you have been sick, but really what does this and to do with that?

I didn't assume you agreed or disagreed. I answered it and you said you were disturbed by people answering it, so I explained why I did (the interest in what makes people tick and my being sick - so having extra time to answer trivial questions).

The question came out of another question on here, as things often do.

 

[cari12]

Agreed. And if my DH saved me instead of our child...I would probably kill him.

My thoughts exactly! I would save my child and then hopefully try to save DH.

 

[cari12]

ITA!!! Plus DH is a strong guy - if he was hanging cliffside with one of our children, before it would be me trying to pull them up, he'd be pushing for all he's worth with one hand while hanging on with the other.

My DH too!

 

[mhsjax]

I didn't assume you agreed or disagreed. I answered it and you said you were disturbed by people answering it, so I explained why I did (the interest in what makes people tick and my being sick - so having extra time to answer trivial questions).

The question came out of another question on here, as things often do.

Ah, see what I actually said is that I was disturbed at people coming up with the question, not answering it. Sitting around thinking about disturbing questions is much different than answering them.

HOpe you feel better.