Kid fave ride

[RedHeadedFairy]

So, you are saying your child won't throw a fit in the park?

Then I'm not referring to your child.

I think what I'm saying here is that it's ridiculous to judge ANY child/parent or make snap judgements about how effective or not their parenting style is based on seeing a child meltdown at a place like WDW.

Like spectrecat points out - you have no way of knowing what the circumstances are for that specific child/situation based on an observation that can't last more than a minute or 2. Not every child that has a "moment" is a spoiled, rotten brat with bad parents.

 

[SEA333]

I think what I'm saying here is that it's ridiculous to judge ANY child/parent or make snap judgements about how effective or not their parenting style is based on seeing a child meltdown at a place like WDW.

Like spectrecat points out - you have no way of knowing what the circumstances are for that specific child/situation based on an observation that can't last more than a minute or 2. Not every child that has a "moment" is a spoiled, rotten brat with bad parents.

Valid points! I agree with pretty much all of them. And all have been addressed in my posts.

Not judging, just reflecing on how parenting styles *can* impact how our kids react to things. Borrowing trouble by predicting that our kids will be *that* disappointed before we even get to the closed ride is a parenting choice. I choose not to parent that way, and honestly, if people choose to, I don't really care. I don't understand why someone would want to, but I also never understood why people would not potty-train until *they* were ready, even when the toddler clearly was. Again, same as having to explain a ride closure 6 month s ahead of time, I'm not the one prolonging having to change poopy diapers, so not really my problem! I never base my opinion of a child on what I see in 2 minutes as I'm passing by. I have a 13 year old - trust me, I have been embarrassed many times by his "teenage temper tantrums". As any parent knows, a kid can flip out any second for anything. You are right - that is not an indicator of being spoiled. Besides, my observations are about anticipating the melt-down and preparing the child in the privacy of their OWN HOME, so I'm not really sure how the "snap-judgement...based on an observation that can't last more than a minute or 2" is pertinent here?

Personally, what I consider spoiled, and this is barring any special needs circumstances, is when a parent ANTICIPATES the child throwing a fit over something that is silly or nonconsequential, such as a ride, and changes their behaviors to accomodate that child's mood. (going to 4 different resturants with three other adults to accomodate one screaming 5 year old, IMO, fits under this category) Whatever....if that is how someone wants to live, go right ahead! But I can have my opinion and state it, whether you agree or not. My opening statement was that I am surprised at how many people feel that a ride closure would be such a problem that they think their kids have to be "prepared" to deal with it. It's a social observation, not a judgement.

Have a great day!!

 

[bartleby1]

I prefer to prepare my kids ahead of time. I know that I like to know ahead of time if MY favorite ride will be down so I do the same for my kids. I'd rather we be disappointed while at home than at Disney.

 

[disdoit]

I guess to me the teaching moment isn't lost at all - we still deal with the surprise of finding out that something we expected to happen won't be happening. How is it any different than me finding out the same information as an adult here on the Dis? Aren't we ALL here for this exact type of planning advice and don't most of us do that same type of research for ANY vacation we're planning for the most part?

We still have the moment of disappointment, the "Hey, there's still plenty of stuff to do" talk just like you (somewhat condescendingly) referred to in your post, but we have it ahead of time instead of in the park. And probably she'd say, "WTG Mom for finding out so we can adjust our touring plans & expectations around it." (cuz that's the kind of kid she is - she finds gratitude in every moment) I'm not teaching her to NOT handle disappointment, I'm teaching her the value of preparedness & planning.

If we DIDN'T know ahead of time & got to the park & found out, it still wouldn't be a biggie..... she still wouldn't have a fit or embarrassing public meltdown because my parenting style isn't lacking as you suggested. She's a well rounded, good humored child who knows how to roll with the punches & see the sunny side of things.... but that doesn't de-value sharing information with her ahead of time to ensure she has as great of a vacation as possible & making the most of every minute.

Like you said though, to each their own.

I think RHF's comments are right on. Our guys, at 7 and 8, are incredibly easy going and past the "throw a fit in public" stage. And even when they were younger I sincerely doubt a ride closure wouldn't have created anything close to a meltdown.

But of course they'd be disappointed. After all, they probably just spent the last several months getting excited about the trip, counting down the days and talking to each other and their friends about how awesome it's going to be to ride Space Mountain again and again.

For us, it wouldn't make sense to have a "Sorry folks, park's closed, the moose out front should have told you" moment in the park when we could have shared the information in advance and avoided the later disappointment. In fact, our guys are also old enough, and the older one is definitely perceptive enough (scary perceptive in fact), to catch on to the fact that *we may have known* the ride was going to be closed but didn't tell him. That would probably upset him even more than the ride being closed.

Disney World is not our setting of choice to teach our kids about disappointment, toughen them up for the real world, or whatever. *It's Disney World.*

 

[Mama Who]

But, I always have told my kids ahead of time what is closed. Not to avoid tantrums. But, because I would never purposefully cause my kids to feel the type of disappointment I felt that day.

Exactly. While a child will not die of a last minute disappointment, I see no reason to create one when I know ahead of time that it's coming. In the "real world" people keep touting, we often get notice of pending disappointments in advance.

 

[dvczerfs]

I would go ahead and tell him now...then focus on all the other fun things you get to do!!
Have fun!

heck we skip a ride or two that we love just so we have an excuse to go back.

 

[ktlm]

I just want to caution those that may not have kids that meltdown or have "issues" to be sensitive to those that do. I have seen parents stare and judge when a parent removes a child from a situation so as not to make things worse, and my heart goes out to them. We may not know what private battles they fight and how they have struggled for years to parent a child with specific needs and daily unpredictability. It's not always a temper tantrum from a spoiled brat.

Absolutely! Some parents are lucky enough to have children with calm personalities. Some parents get high intensity kids. Sometimes, it has nothing to do with parenting (although there are spoiled brats out there). It also isn't always because they are autistic or have any type of disorder, syndrome, or anything which in any way you would "treat". Some of it is just their make-up. It is an inherent part of their personality and the type of kid they are. Some kids are just more intense than others. Although PP said she wasn't judging, it sounded like it was my previous post that she was reacting to, and since that appears to be the case, I will explain our situation so that maybe next time someone sees a kid melting down over something that may seem totally trivial(when they don't personally know the kid or their parents and their situation), they won't necessarily jump to a judgment that the kid is a spoiled brat.

Believe me, I know that parenting that kind of kid can be exhausting because that's what we got- high energy, high intensity, animated, loud, will talk an adult's or older kid's ear off, must have an explanation for everything, total drama queen, often hilarious, creative, kid. Part of parenting that type of child can be anticipating their reactions to certain types of things and knowing how to deal with them to minimize the impact. If I tell her a ride is going to be closed 3 months before our trip, then she wraps her head around it that day and we won't have an emotional problem in the park. If she has been looking forward to riding Peter Pan for 6 months, and we get there and it is closed our entire trip, it isn't going to be pretty. I know that because of her personality type. Why wouldn't I tell her and totally diffuse the situation? We've actually been told by DD's regular and G/T teachers not to be too hard on her, which we have a tendancy to do, because a lot of her behavior is absolutely typical behavior for a child "of her type". It is kind of in the same ballpark as some kids are sporty, some kids are artsy, some kids are quiet, some kids are loud etc. We can't expect her to react what we would call "normally" in every situation. We found out last school year that the name for her temperament is Dabrowski's intensity which basically means that she reacts more strongly than normal for a longer period than normal to a stimulus that may be very small. It is not a disorder, it is not something you treat, it is just part of who she is and considered absolutely and totally normal in a kid like her. She can be "intense", but other times she is totally easy going, flexible, and totally easy to deal with. As a result, she may be the kid who rolls with the punches a lot of the time and is totally flexible when something big hits; she may be the 7 year old who can be selfless at times and donates her own money to tornado relief or gives up her snack and gives her snack money to a friend who says she is hungry at summer camp; but she may also be the kid you see having a total melt-down over something which to most (including her own parents who would like to pull their hair out) would seem absolutely ridiculous (like her toenail polish is not the color she thought it would be and there is no time to change it). She can also understand things and be reasoned with so if you know that something is coming up that might trigger her, then you can come up with a way to diffuse the possibility of an outburst and everyone is happier. But if that intensity outburst hits- EEEEKKK!!!

While the PP may think that a ride closure is silly and inconsequential, to a young emotionally intense child it is not. Hey, as an adult, if I didn't know in advance and got to WDW and discovered that Peter Pan was closed our entire trip, I'd be pretty disappointed myself!