caribbeanme
Where the humuhumunukunukuapu'a go swimmin' by..
- Joined
- May 31, 2003
Hi all-
Starting my way down the dieting path. Frankly, this path is so well taken that I've dug it up, paved it, and put up ornamental plants...this ain't my first dieting rodeo. I have been overweight all my life. Well, all the life I can remember, 'cuz I have seen pictures of me at age 3 where I am sporting the most ridiculous 70s psychedelic bikini. But I'm slim and I have a smile on my face. I can confidently say that that was the last time I was happy to take a picture in a swimsuit.
I think I have about 150 pounds to lose, give or take. Me and the scale are having a Cold War since last year. But my husband (newly minted) has made me promise that I will get on the scale tomorrow. I don't wanna.
I still don't have a plan, per se. I am looking at meal delivery services because my relationship with food is so disfunctional that I wouldn't know a proper portion if my life depended on it.
Which it kind of does. While my blood tests and pressure seem to be ok, I know that it's just a matter of time. If my family is any indication, I am at risk of heart disease, stroke, breast cancer, skin cancer, diabetes, and Alzheimer's. I was fine until my husband saw the new show Ruby (on the Style channel), and started hugging me and was thisclose to crying. My pillar of strength was losing it because he thought I could die. And that did me in. It's easy to ignore my weight and health. Indeed, I'm a pro at ignoring them...I mean, how else did I get to be this fat? But seeing him be afraid for me was more than I could take.
So here I go again. Frankly, I would like to learn how to scuba dive. I would like to wear a seatbelt without struggling with it. I would like to get on an airplane and not whisper to the airline hostess that I need a seatbelt extender, or pray that I don't make the person seated next to me uncomfortable. I would like to walk, to run even, without feeling winded.
I would like to get on Disney rides without feeling like I'll need someone to unwedge me when I get out. I would like to ride Primeval Whirl without feeling like it will actually tip all the way over because of my weight. I'd like to go to Universal Studios Islands of Adventure and not have to try the pudge seats to figure out if I can ride.
I would like to not be embarrassed. Maybe smile in a swimsuit again.
In any case, this is my diary. Feel free to comment, say hi, or demand that I post some ACTUAL dieting stuffage.
I expect that the next few posts will be about me trying to figure out how I'm going to do this. And off we go...
Starting my way down the dieting path. Frankly, this path is so well taken that I've dug it up, paved it, and put up ornamental plants...this ain't my first dieting rodeo. I have been overweight all my life. Well, all the life I can remember, 'cuz I have seen pictures of me at age 3 where I am sporting the most ridiculous 70s psychedelic bikini. But I'm slim and I have a smile on my face. I can confidently say that that was the last time I was happy to take a picture in a swimsuit.
I think I have about 150 pounds to lose, give or take. Me and the scale are having a Cold War since last year. But my husband (newly minted) has made me promise that I will get on the scale tomorrow. I don't wanna.
I still don't have a plan, per se. I am looking at meal delivery services because my relationship with food is so disfunctional that I wouldn't know a proper portion if my life depended on it.
Which it kind of does. While my blood tests and pressure seem to be ok, I know that it's just a matter of time. If my family is any indication, I am at risk of heart disease, stroke, breast cancer, skin cancer, diabetes, and Alzheimer's. I was fine until my husband saw the new show Ruby (on the Style channel), and started hugging me and was thisclose to crying. My pillar of strength was losing it because he thought I could die. And that did me in. It's easy to ignore my weight and health. Indeed, I'm a pro at ignoring them...I mean, how else did I get to be this fat? But seeing him be afraid for me was more than I could take.
So here I go again. Frankly, I would like to learn how to scuba dive. I would like to wear a seatbelt without struggling with it. I would like to get on an airplane and not whisper to the airline hostess that I need a seatbelt extender, or pray that I don't make the person seated next to me uncomfortable. I would like to walk, to run even, without feeling winded.
I would like to get on Disney rides without feeling like I'll need someone to unwedge me when I get out. I would like to ride Primeval Whirl without feeling like it will actually tip all the way over because of my weight. I'd like to go to Universal Studios Islands of Adventure and not have to try the pudge seats to figure out if I can ride.
I would like to not be embarrassed. Maybe smile in a swimsuit again.
In any case, this is my diary. Feel free to comment, say hi, or demand that I post some ACTUAL dieting stuffage.
I expect that the next few posts will be about me trying to figure out how I'm going to do this. And off we go...
I've been yo-yoing up and down since. Logically, if you add up all the weight I've lost over the years, I theoretically should be dangling from a charm bracelet.
Especially when I'm working out. Like, when I do the Warrior Pose or the lunges on Wii Fit, I push my arms OUT with every exhale and say "Push out the fat!". With every inhale I bring my arms back in and say "Bring in the good!". I don't know if it's working or not, but it makes me feel better.
