I need some advise about Kindergarten-kind of long. Sorry

[mom_of_3_70737]

Hi another Mom here! My opinion is that all kids are different. They all mature and progress at different rates. Your child's preschool teacher should be able to tell you if your DS is (in their opinion) advanced enough for Kindergarten or if they have any concerns. My DD turned 5 on May 30th last year and started Kindergarten in August. If I would have had the slightest concern about her I would have held her back a year. She is the youngest in the class, but has done extremely well and is at the head of her class. All of the other children in her class have already turned 6 and she won't until after school gets out for summer vacation. You know your child better than anyone. I would just wait and see how it goes. Good luck!

 

[Hillbeans]

In NJ the cutoff for school is 10/1 and my son was born on 9/23.

He has been attending pre-school 2x a week since September and will go 3x a week next year. He is also really big for his age. I do sometimes wonder if he'll be ok when I send him to K in the fall of 2010 but after seeing how much he's learned already in Pre-school I expect he will definitely be ready for K next fall. I am sure your pre-school teacher will help you decide what is best in your situation.

Also, our Kindergarten is 1/2 day.

 

[beavismom]

Mom of an 8th grade boy here and I vote hold him back. My son's birthday is one day before the cutoff and we sent him because he was already reading and had done well in Pre-K. Unfortunately, the maturity issue doesn't really surface until later years and then it is a much harder decision to hold them back. If I had it to do all over again I would have waited the extra year to send him, but hindsight is 20/20 and we just do the best we can at this point.

 

[absmom2]

Hi! Another mom here. My opinion agrees with what others have said. I wouldn't attempt to make this decision yet. I'd wait and see how he is interacting and progressing in Pre-K. With that said, my son has an Oct. birthday and the cut off if Sept. so I didn't have to make your decision but if I would've been faced with the choice I would have held him. He is a very bright child and knew all he needed to know prior to K but he, like your son, was very small for his age. Even now, in 1st Grade, and being one of the older kids in his class he is still smaller than most the others. It hasn't caused any problems but I can't imagine if he had started school a year earlier and was now in 2nd grade.

Every child is different, good luck in your decision!

 

[crisi]

Our cutoff is Sept 1 and my son has a late August birthday. We held him.

Its rare in our area (Twin Cities) to do so and he is the oldest kid in his class. I was a little surprised by that. He is in forth grade now, handling the material very well. He is also a little short for his age, which doesn't show as much when many of his friends are eleven months younger rather than him being eleven months younger than them.

I'm not in any rush to have him grow up (or my daughter) - an extra year to save for college will be nice. I was the youngest kid in my class and it really wasn't easy.

One thing to keep in mind is if your residence is stable - states have really different cut off ages - which is how I ended up being young for my grade - I started school in a state with a late cutoff, ended school where they had an early cutoff.

 

[charissemp]

I'd just play it by ear and make the decision when the time comes. My son is also tiny and had a birthday just a few weeks before the cut off. I could tell that he was ready, and I don't regret sending him. He's just about to finish first grade now, and he's excelling.
My daughter, however, isn't even close to the cut-off date (January birthday), and I'm already worried about whether she's ready. : )

 

[disney_family_1247]

I have a Masters in Education (I sat that to give my arguement more weight ). Keep him out the extra year. You may not notice what a great thing you've done for years and years, but one day, you will realize how lucky he is to not be the youngest/smallest kid in his grade. Boys mature more slowly than girls. Schools have changed a lot since we were all kids. Kindergarten is not a lovey-dovey place to play and learn in a gentle environment. It is SCHOOL, with desk work, home work, etc. Study after study has shown that many boys are just not ready for that at such a young age. Ask your husband, would he rather start him a year early, or have him held back in first or second grade? Which would be worse for your son's self esteem?

You are not being a freak

 

[kitsch4]

My son's b-day is at the beginning of September. The daycare where he went has a private Kindergarten, so we sent him there. That way, we could see how he did that year and then decide if he needed to go to K at the public school or go into first grade. At the beginning of the year, I never would have thought that he would be ready to go into first grade, but he learned sooo much and matured a great deal in K and would have been really bored repeating it. You really can't judge right now whether your child will be ready for K or not next year since they develop rapidly and learn a lot in a year. I'd wait until later in the year to decide. If he is in preschool, his teacher can also be a big help in your decision.

Good luck!

 

[xmlguy]

Your kid should start school immediately, today is not too soon.

No, not to that place outside your home your neighbors call "school". To the school that resides inside the walls of your home. The one with the teachers who love their child more than any other strangers could, or would do. The ones who refuse to delegate the upbringing of their child to others, in the best interest of their own family.

Don't let "school" get in the way of your child's education. If you are functionally literate parents, you have a far better chance of keeping your kids well above grade level targets throughout primary school. You can find plenty of opportunities outside of "schools" to provide healthy social interaction with peers. Try it for a year. Before you send your kids to public school, check how many of your local, state, and federal politicians send their kids to the same schools. Then check to see if there are any affordable private schools nearby, and compare them to the public options in terms of the quality of the education, the teachers, and the environment.

 

[3Minnies1Mickey]

Our school district cutoff is in December. My ODD turned 5 on Oct. 21 of her Kindergarten year (she started in August at age of 4). I do not regret it at all, even though every person I spoke with said I was making a mistake (they didn't even know my child!). Her Kindergarten teacher totally agreed she was ready. She is the youngest in her class but going into the GATE program next year.

That being said, boys are very different. I would wait to make a decision until the time comes, a year makes a HUGE difference at this age. Definitely talk to his preschool teacher next spring about her opinion. If enrollment is in early spring, still enroll him. You can always change your mind before school starts. I see more and more boys starting Kindergarten at the age of 6. Some for maturity issues, but a lot because of future advantages in high school sports (this is straight from some parents). Whatever you decide, it will be what's best for your child.

 

[daisyyy]

My DD made the cut off date by 12 days.. so we sent her... she was still 4 when she started KG and turned 5 that month. She was always the youngest in her class... the 1st year it really wasn't a problem, and we thought how lucky we were that she made the cut off, and we saved a whole year's worth of day care... when she started 1st grade is when we noticed she was struggling with many basics that we never noticed before.. It was like she had dyslexia.. writing letters backwards, and from the wrong side of the paper. etc... example... the word "look" was kool to her... In anycase... she got some extra reading support, and we were told that she was on level with the rest of her class.... but I still think she struggles. She is in 4th grade now, and I just had a conversation with dd's teacher and was told they didn't think she could read an analog clock either. ... so... bottom line.. go with your gut... At this point, I would hate to keep her back after being with friends for 4 years... but maybe you could always start with the kindergarten.. andnear the end of the 1st year, talk to the teacher and decide if they feel if he's ready to move on to 1st grade.. or maybe just do KG again... Say... yes, we know he's a wonderful kid, but is he ready to move on academically, socially. I wish we had that conversation with our KG teacher. The trouble with my DD is she gets by a lot on her "charm" personality,,,, hopefully it will get her through life.... Now.... on the otherhand... I have another DD who also went to KG on the early side and she's doing great... it's just a matter of their personalities I think. One is more serious about school, where the other who just made the cut off isn't. I have a DS starting KG this september... I will definitely be careful about pushing him to 1st grade if he's not ready... I would rather keep him in KG 2 years,,, afterall, how much different is KG than the preschool?

 

[Tara619]

DH is a 6th grade teacher (and has his master's in education administration) and obviously talks to the other lower grade teachers. Our son's birthday is 7/18/05. We've decided to start him when he's 6, especially since it's a late summer birthday and he's a boy. Boys tend to be more immature than girls. He has talked to about 20 people who agree that 6 is better for late summer birthdays. Some he talked to sent their first at 5 and their second at 6 and wish they would've waited with their first, too.

Mental, emotional, and physical maturity are the main reasons we're doing it.

ETA: His academic level (smartness) didn't play into our decision. He's actually way ahead of the game as of now, so we're sure if he did start at 5, he'd be fine intellectually.

 

[DisneyPoohBear]

We are dealing with the same situation. Our son turns 5 July 29th and the cutoff is August 1st. We have decided to send him on to kindergarten after discussing it. He has been going to a playschool for the last two years and we think he is ready. I think it's a personal choice for each family depending on the child.

 

[DonnaBelle06]

When my niece started school - she missed it by 1 day and the school system would NOT budge....(her bday is Oct 1 and the cut off was Sep 30).

She had to wait the year and guess what - she was an honor roll student ALL THROUGH SCHOOL - graduated h/s with honors and next week completes her 1st year of college with all A's.

Not saying that all kids are the same - but it helped her with that extra year....

GOOD LUCK!

 

[HGD24]

I started Kindergarten when I was 4, turned 5 very late in the year and I was (still am) very tiny. I was reading at college levels in 5th grade. In high school, I did really well with English, History and Science and even took a college level English course. I played sports, went to all of the dances and sporting events and made friends with the older kids in my grade as well as those closer to my age. My grades weren't fantastic, but I was happy with the mostly B's that I got. I started college at 17 and graduated 4 years later with a double major. My GPA was 2.7 - again not great, but not too bad either. My sister kept all 3 of her boys back a year before Kindergarten because she felt they weren't ready to start, even though 2 of them had already turned 5 years old before the school year started. All of them ended up with bad grades and tended to cause trouble during classes. They all barely graduated high school - so I don't know that there is a fool-proof way to decide other than knowing your own child and what they are capable of.

Good luck with your decision OP!

 

[mom2att]

I have two boys with August birthdays in a state with a Sept. 1 cutoff. One was ready for K at just-turned 5, the other was not. There's no need to agonize over this decision now--at this age children change so quickly there's really no way of knowing what he will be like a whole year from now. Even then you may not be totally sure, but trust yourself--you know him best!

 

[RN01]

My daughter's birthday is August 31. Our cutoff date is Sept 1 so of course I waited untill the next year to send her. Along with her there was 4 other kids in her class who's birthdays were in August that waited. One birthday was even in June that waited. None of them say they regret it.

 

[sdoll]

I do know its too early. I will talk it over with his preschool teacher when the time comes. I guess I wanted confirmation that I am right to worry or at least consider it. I will not make a decision until after his screening next year. Its just a question that has been on my mind. I think its my job to ensure I consider everything when it comes to his education. He is a very socially comfortable boy. I have no fear about that it truly is about maturity. He is doing ok in Preschool. His teacher said he is average in his development while being the youngest child. So we will see. I guess I will update you next year!

 

[anabelle]

I didn't read the whole thread.. Sorry if this was already suggested

Most Kindergarten teachers can test your child's readiness. Request it if that is possible.

In Michigan , the cut off date is December 1. Our Kindergarten teacher used a test that determined the child's "age" or maturity score. She wanted them to test at about 5 1/2 years old in maturity. I know it had puzzles and physical tests. My oldest who had a late October birthday, knew how to read so we thought for sure he would be ready for Kindergarten. He didn't score high enough. So we kept him back. Now at first he was bored, but as the years progressed, I saw how that extra year of maturity helped him so much. He was right on target with his peers.

My daughter who had a mid-July birthday did not score well either. Even though she ended up being the oldest in the class, she was very even in maturity with the other students.

They both were straight A students in school.

 

[hmacmahony]

We have 4 kids, all with late birthdays. My oldest two are within 10 days of the cutoff (oct 1) in our state. The second two are within 3 weeks of the cutoff. So, far we have held 3 of the 4 (the 4 is only 20 months, we have awhile)
In our disctict, it is VERY common place to hold back a year. My older two each have over 10 other kids in their class (the entire 1 grade class) who were held back a year. Not all boys either, just as many girls as boys.
We talked to teachers, the principal, asked to see what is expeted, talked to teachers of higher grades, and just decided. Why push? Honestly in all our talking, we never ran into a single person who regretted holding their child out a year (I am sure someone out there does, we just never found one) Where as we found many people wish they had held their kid a year, instead of sending them. Plus, I don't want my 17 year old going to college. That was a huge factor for us. It was the right choice for my kids.