I am the only one who doesn't care for the holidays?

[Lachesis00]

I never have. Even as a kid. I feel weird opening gifts in front of people (I love gifts I just hate opening them). I love buying for people and watching them open gifts... yes I am weird.

This year really stunk. We did go to a friends for Christmas dinner which I am very thankful for. We got no phone calls (tried calling family and no one was home), *I* got no gifts (my husband did from his side of the family, we didn't get each other anything due to my penny pinching right now)--I know gifts are not all about Christmas but it was kind of embarrassing. My mom normally goes overboard but apparently not this year (which is fine, I would have been happy just talking to her, my dad, my sister and Gram).

It's the first year away from my family (ever), a close family friend passed away (read about it on Christmas eve), no calls or gifts. I've decided if I didn't have a child, I'd forgo the holidays... including Thanksgiving.

 

[totalia]

I never have. Even as a kid. I feel weird opening gifts in front of people (I love gifts I just hate opening them). I love buying for people and watching them open gifts... yes I am weird.

This year really stunk. We did go to a friends for Christmas dinner which I am very thankful for. We got no phone calls (tried calling family and no one was home), *I* got no gifts (my husband did from his side of the family, we didn't get each other anything due to my penny pinching right now)--I know gifts are not all about Christmas but it was kind of embarrassing. My mom normally goes overboard but apparently not this year (which is fine, I would have been happy just talking to her, my dad, my sister and Gram).

It's the first year away from my family (ever), a close family friend passed away (read about it on Christmas eve), no calls or gifts. I've decided if I didn't have a child, I'd forgo the holidays... including Thanksgiving.

I've always loved the holidays. Growing up, Christmas Eve was almways so much fun. We went to my grandmothers. I had alot of cousins around my age and we had so much fun. So much good food and presents. Then the next day, a different grandmother's and more presents, more food, more cousins that I hardly ever got to see.

Sometimes the holidays are hard. Like the year two of my cousins died and then last year, I had recently lost my mother.

BUT..

I love Christmas. This year has added meaning that I never thought about before. I almost died in October in a car accident. I was hit by a car when I was walking home from work and I spent most of November in the hospital. Things have new meaning now.

I'm so grateful to be alive. And I'm so happy to have this Christmas with my family. Things could be alot worse than not receiving presents (and the only presents I got were from my father. No one else gave me anything). I could be dead.

I LOVE life and I'm just happy to be here to celebrate with my family. THAT means far more to me than any gifts.

And even the words that I've typed here just don't have the ability to show the depth of the feelings I have. It all feels so good that it almost makes me cry.