How to get a 14 year old excited about Disney trip

[MissManda]

So, I've been planning this great trip to Disney in June 2012. Last night my 14 year old boy decided to tell me he does not want to go to Disney World. Not only does he not want to go, but he is also under the very mistaken impression that if he doesn't go, that he should get compensated in cash for what we would have spent for him on the trip (not sure when he got to be so greedy).

So, how do you convince him that a Disney trip will be great fun. He's only been to the Magic Kingdom for one day and he thinks its for babies. We've tried to show him other parks have more attractions and that its an overall experience and not just the rides (he thinks if its not all thrill rides its not worth going).

Has anyone else dealt with this problem before? If he really truly does not want to go, do we force him to go or just let him stay home with his grandparents? I really hate for him to miss out on the trip because it will be building special family memories and it will put a damper on the vacation for the rest of us and I think he'd end up regretting staying home. However, at the same time, I don't want him to ruin it for the rest of us with his "teenage attitude" by making him go and I don't want him to be miserable if he really truly doesn't want to go.

I've been planning this trip for months and was going to buy plane tickets this weekend.

Teenagers...I just don't get them!!!

 

[THEJOEL]

Just curious. Did he say why he didn't want to go?
Let him stay home but don't for an instant let him think that he deserves the money for isolating himself from the rest of the family. It will be a lesson for him that he may not learn until later in life but it will be a lesson learned eventually. I wouldn't give him even the slightest opportunity to ruin the vacation for the rest of the family.
I went with my teenage siblings one my first WDW trip. I was 10, they were 16 and 18, and just ruined it with their bickering, complaining and general bad attitude. I honestly hated WDW because it was a bad memory for me. Now I am taking my DD for the second time in two years...go figure.
My Mom and I still talk about how much more fun that trip would have been if it was just me and her that went.

 

[MissManda]

The only reason he really gave was that he thought Disney was for babies. I guess he's feeling "too cool" for Disney right now.

I did make it very clear that under no circumstances will he receive any money if he doesn't go. I explained that this was a family vacation and that the trip and the memories are what counts that he will not be "rewarded" for staying home and if he's just trying to find a way to earn cash, this was not the way to do it.

I was ready to purchase our airline tickets this weekend, but now I feel like I have to hold off and find out what he really wants to do. I don't want to buy a ticket and he really does not want to go and I don't want to not buy a ticket and have him change his mind later on.

I do think if he doesn't go then he will regret it later and it will be life lesson learned. I don't want him to spoil this for the younger kids.

 

[jennamarie]

Did you show him the Rocking Roller Coaster, Expedition Everest, ToT, Dinosaur and the thrill rides that Disney does offer? There may only be a few, but if your son is looking for the thrill then those are really good rides to show him.

Like you said, if he really does not want to go then I wouldn't force him and ruin the trip for others. I have been on a trip where a few of the people did not want to be there and they just slowed the trip down and their bad attitudes brought the rest of us down.

However, teenagers change their minds as much as they change their underwear! Haha, so I think it is good that you are holding out on the plane tickets.

Maybe you could let him explore a few Disney websites on his own and tell him to pick something that he wants to do or seems interesting to him (maybe a special experience if it is in your budget).

I hope he changes his mind and you get to enjoy a family vacation!

 

[Cin]

I would have him go, but he can hang out at the resort and do nothing or lay at the pool with his attitude after that and I would go to the parks and have fun. He is old enough to be left unattended during the day. Maybe after a few hours (or it may take a couple of days) and he might decide to join in and see what everyone is talking about that he is missing. So you have unused ticket days? I traveled with a WDW resistor too and he actually had two park days left unused and even though I cringed at the loss of money on an unused ticket, we were together on a family vacation and still making memories and his attitude was sooo much better when I didn't push the parks on him and in the end everyone was happy and we have good memories overall of our trip and he is willing to return to WDW. He learned about the Richard Petty driving and he wants to do that soooo bad. He also loved Animal Kingdom Lodge and wants to stay there next time. DHS was an all day hit though for my Disney resistor. EPCOT was alright too. He loved Mission Space orange. How about a water park day for your teen? Disney has the best waterparks! I don't know your son though, that is just what worked for us.

 

[shells4]

This sounds exactly like my 14yo son! We are planning a trip in Mar. and at first he didn't want to go. His choice was to get a week off school and go with us or stay home with his dad for the week and go to school (he really doesn't like staying at his dad's that long). He decided a week at WDW would be the better choice. My son doesn't like the thrill rides and the rest of the family does. We will see how things go, but I think he will have a little freedom this trip to do a few things on his own. He is much more receptive to the idea this way. He loves to fish and we are staying at a resort he can rent fishing equipment. I am also thinking of renting the little speed boats for a couple of hours (can't remember what they are called). We might let him sleep in a day and meet up with us later, he can hang out at the hotel, or pool for a bit. He also would really enjoy and hour or two checking out the park by himself while we do the thrill rides. After discussing some of these things he seems to be a bit more interested in the trip. Also we let him pick a restarant for the family one night, he had to research a little bit about the parks to make the decision. My son has been there before so he does realize that there are many interesting things there for older kids. He was resistant to the last trip also but once we got there he really enjoyed it. Although, he was 11 the last trip and the teenage attitude was only beginning then!

 

[karlacorley]

This will be our first Disney trip and our 16 yr old ds wants to go, I asked before booking just because of the coolness factor..lol.. but he said" heck yeah I wanna go." I hope he changes his mind, maybe just the hanging out at the pool or the hotel will be good enough for him. I wouldnt MAKE him go though.

 

[coltsfanatic]

There are so many great opportunities which teenagers will love! Water parks, nightlife, arcades like DisneyQuest, pools, thrill rides, great food...

 

[roxysmum123]

Not only does he not want to go, but he is also under the very mistaken impression that if he doesn't go, that he should get compensated in cash for what we would have spent for him on the trip (not sure when he got to be so greedy).

Hehe, sorry to chuckle at that but it's the exact same logic my sister would have used at that age.

Maybe get him more involved in the planning? If he's a foodie, let him research and make some ADR's? Maybe see if there's a tour he'd want to do?

 

[MissManda]

Thanks for the input everyone. I think that while he is out of school this week for Thanksgiving break that I can talk to him about the trip and show him that there is more to do there than what he thinks. Like several of you suggested, maybe if he's more involved in the planning he'll have more interest in going. I do tend to micromanage vacation planning. Perhaps its time to let go of some of that control and get some other input.

Going to one of the water parks is a great idea. He loves water parks (and he doesn't care as much for the real extreme water rides like he does rides at amusement parks). Maybe I can let him research the two and let him decide which one he thinks would be the best.

Also, I just realized that we might catch the last Star Wars Weekend (we'll be arriving June 9th). He's a Star Wars fan so maybe that will entice him as well.

I will also let the boys do a separate breakfast while us girls do the princess breakfast at Epcot. I know he wasn't thrilled about that one.

Hopefully he will come around!

 

[katiemely]

What about a day at Universal? They have a lot more thrill rides . .

 

[duffy]

Not only does he not want to go, but he is also under the very mistaken impression that if he doesn't go, that he should get compensated in cash for what we would have spent for him on the trip (not sure when he got to be so greedy).

Aww, they're so funny at that age, aren't they? They say the cutest things.

 

[GirlDreamer]

Yeah, it might be good to let him in on the planning A good idea could also be to show him the stunt shows in DHS, especially Cars, motor action. I think boys that age might like the idea of that.

 

[Brit_Jude]

Suggest you let him plan whole day. We have done this, each family member gets to choose a park and plan out what they want to do, where to eat, everything for that day. If he is computer savvy (hey what teenager isn't) this might get him reading about rides and suggest he use YouTube to see what the rides are like. It might make him feel better if he feels like he is more in control and not being told "what to do". There is the feature to create your own maps on the Disney site.

What about something special just for him, as the girls are getting a princess breakfast. It costs a lot but the teenage boys in our extended family like the surfing lessons at Typhoon lagoon. Also there is the Richard Petty driving school - not sure of the age requirements.

Is there anyway to take a friend with him, do you know of any parents who would be willing to pay some money and have their child go with you. It always helps if there is a peer to 'hang out with" if possible. We put the boys in a connecting room.

As others have suggested if your best efforts fail - then take him along and allow him to hang out in the resort.

Out teenage Son now 17 begs to go to Disney - he is not the same boy we first took at 14 who would not ride on anything.

Edited to add: Don't forget about the Teen Forum here on the Disboards maybe you can show him that and he can ask questions about Disney being for 'young kids' or any other questions he wants.

 

[cocofifi]

We went in October and my 14 year old son wasn't excited about the trip and was not into thrill rides. That all changed once we got there. He rode everything, had a blast and wants to know when we're going back. I hope you and your son have a great time. Good luck!

 

[duffy]

My daughter had first gone to Disney World when she was four-turned-five on the trip. Then we didn't go until she was 13. (we were putting her 2 older sisters through college for 6 years!)

She was pretty "meh" about the trip until we got there. On the first night, (we stayed at the Wilderness Lodge), we were walking around the grounds and she SPONTANEOUSLY just said, "I love you, Mom."

A teenager! Admitting her love for a parent! It took Disney to do it.

 

[bopper]

Maybe ask him questions like "Can you look up to see if you are old enough to drive a boat in the lagoon by yourself this year?" (and you know the answer is yes)
or
"At Epcot, should we start with Mission Space or Test Track?"

"Could you look up the Lights, Motors, Action show at DHS and see if that is something that would be good?"

Basically anything that would showcase the type of stuff he likes to do.

 

[matt and beth]

Tell him he is behaving like a baby so he should fit in nicely.

Next, I would state the fact that if he ruins the trip for the family I would ruin his social life so suck it up. Do not forget the evil laugh look and laugh.

Lastly, I would tell him there are lots of girls his age wondering the parks and staying in his hotel that he might team up with. Keep your eyes peeled for a keeper. If he has a girlfriend tell him what happens in Disney stays in Disney.

 

[MagicDan]

You could always see if he'd rather have a day at IoA, where there are more thrill rides. When I went, my 19yr old brother didn't care for WDW, but we pleased everyone. We went to a baseball game, IoA and US for the "thrill rides", and Disney, because it's a sin for me to go to Orlando and not go to WDW.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

Mine always say they don't want to go. I think they've been one too many times now.
They always manage to have fun when they get there though.

I'd tell your 14 year old that he's going anyway since it's a family vacation and he's just going to have to deal. I'd also include him on the planning - bet he'd like some time at Disney Quest. LOL