How old is too old for DD's to go with DH in the men's room?

[imthatgirl]

Just want to state that I was at a concert this past weekend and there were some girls that were arrested for being in the mens rooms. They had security posted at the restrooms to make sure people were using the correct restrooms. Men have a right to be at a urinal without women walking by them. You admitted that it was against the law where you live (which happens to be where I live as well), but apparently you don't seem to care. That is what I am confused about. I get that you have your hands full, and I'm sorry for that, but a girl does have a right to privacy without boys in the restrooms. Every park does have companion restrooms. I would scope these out and schedule potty breaks at them throughout the day. There are girls, my DD included, who would be very nervous with boys walking in a LADIES room alone. She has rights to.

I'm assuming these girls were over the age of 15 like the laws says? Under 15 and they are allowed to be there. All of my kids are under 15.

 

[Hannathy]

So you are trying to tell us that in bolder women can walk around topless....sorry, I'm not buying it.

no that would be public lewdness. big difference but a women can breastfeed and that is OK or be nude in the bathroom. Again the law has a lot on nuances.

 

[ccgirl]

I'm assuming these girls were over the age of 15 like the laws says? Under 15 and they are allowed to be there. All of my kids are under 15.

Yes, sure were. I thought they had to be accompanied if they were under 15 and using the opposite gender bathroom???

 

[imthatgirl]

Yes, sure were. I thought they had to be accompanied if they were under 15 and using the opposite gender bathroom???

Nothing in the law in most states about that.

 

[ccgirl]

Nothing in the law in most states about that.

And, if there was what that matter to you? You stated you used the mens room at a Red Sox Patriots game when you knew it was illegal to. So apparently, you had more "right" than the men did??? That is what is so confusing to me.

 

[imthatgirl]

And, if there was what that matter to you? You stated you used the mens room at a Red Sox Patriots game when you knew it was illegal to. So apparently, you had more "right" than the men did??? That is what is so confusing to me.

"if" there was...what a stupid question. there isn't...so it doesn't matter what you want to hypothetically call upon, lol.
BTW, we all break laws everyday that suit us. Don't tell me you've never jay walked....

 

[mjkacmom]

I dont know as I said my son is way too young for this to be an issue but 10 just seems so young to me for them to be left alone in a strange place even for a few min.

We are talking about a 5th grader, not a toddler! I can't imagine NOT feeling comfortable leaving a 10 year old on a bench for a few minutes (having a 10 year old, myself).

 

[nhmommy]

If he is not old enough to behave on a bench outside he should be in the stall with mom. If she cannot trust him t obehave outside the restroom on his own there is no expectation that he would do so inside either. He apparently needed to be supervised.

I think so too. But how does this fix the problem of little girls being uncomfortable with boys in the restaurant they're still in there. I'm making the argument only to say there's no absolute right answer and it's unfair to judge. Parents should just make every effort to be as conscientious as possible that everyone is safe and comfortable.
Also I feel there is a huge safety difference between a child being completely outside the restroom while you wait in-line , use the restroom and wash your hands. And a child waiting outside the stall where you can both hear each other for 45 seconds while you use the restroom*

 

[DianeW]

If you are referring to the nudity laws in Boulder, CO....you can be topless and in public there. Of course, Boulder is its own little world. We used to live only 20 miles away in Westminster....different planet.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/18/catharine-pierce-boulders_n_505028.html

 

[mjkacmom]

Boys going into the girls bathroom alone, without their mom, is not normal. Those little pictures on the bathroom door? They have a purpose. You aren't supposed to just pick and choose at will.

And if its so normal, do you use the men's room on occasion?

WHY is this your choice? It doesn't make any sense.

Honestly, although I've seen boys 6+ in the ladies room, I don't think I've EVER seen one without a parent. And usually the boys seem quite embarrassed and uncomfortable.

 

[nhmommy]

I think so too. But how does this fix the problem of little girls being uncomfortable with boys in the restaurant they're still in there. I'm making the argument only to say there's no absolute right answer and it's unfair to judge. Parents should just make every effort to be as conscientious as possible that everyone is safe and comfortable.
Also I feel there is a huge safety difference between a child being completely outside the restroom while you wait in-line , use the restroom and wash your hands. And a child waiting outside the stall where you can both hear each other for 45 seconds while you use the restroom*

And I'm not talking about a 10 year old. Not specifically at least I will admit I really have no idea how old 10 years old is. I'm talking about a child that cannot be trusted to behave alone that others may determine to be too old to be in the wrong rest room

 

[2prettyprincesses]

Wow...this is all getting a little out of hand. The bottom line is that a mom has the right to parent thier child the way they see fit. You may not agree with it but it's not your kid. Would my girls be uncomfortable if a young boy came on the restroom? Yes, but that's just how they were raised. My DH never took them in the men's room unless they were toddlers. It makes other people uncomfortable, including him and the girls.

Can I just say that everyone hates a child molester, and many people would interfere if they saw something. Moms get very worked up that something might happen in a Public restroom but in a place like WDW, the risk is almost nonexistent. All in all, everyone has irrational fears and diffrent experiences than someone else. You may not know the full story of someone elses kid.

P.S- I was kidnapped as a child and I have major worry issues with my girls. Same with my mother, she is still terrified for me. But you can't hold your child back on doing normal things, like going to a bathroom. It just causes trouble later in life.

 

[Mkrop]

Wow...this is all getting a little out of hand. The bottom line is that a mom has the right to parent thier child the way they see fit. You may not agree with it but it's not your kid. Would my girls be uncomfortable if a young boy came on the restroom? Yes, but that's just how they were raised. My DH never took them in the men's room unless they were toddlers. It makes other people uncomfortable, including him and the girls.

Can I just say that everyone hates a child molester, and many people would interfere if they saw something. Moms get very worked up that something might happen in a Public restroom but in a place like WDW, the risk is almost nonexistent. All in all, everyone has irrational fears and diffrent experiences than someone else. You may not know the full story of someone elses kid.

P.S- I was kidnapped as a child and I have major worry issues with my girls. Same with my mother, she is still terrified for me. But you can't hold your child back on doing normal things, like going to a bathroom. It just causes trouble later in life.

I disagree if a child can be molested at one of their waterparks, then their bathrooms do not offer anymore security to me.

 

[ccgirl]

Wow...this is all getting a little out of hand. The bottom line is that a mom has the right to parent thier child the way they see fit. You may not agree with it but it's not your kid. Would my girls be uncomfortable if a young boy came on the restroom? Yes, but that's just how they were raised. My DH never took them in the men's room unless they were toddlers. It makes other people uncomfortable, including him and the girls.

Can I just say that everyone hates a child molester, and many people would interfere if they saw something. Moms get very worked up that something might happen in a Public restroom but in a place like WDW, the risk is almost nonexistent. All in all, everyone has irrational fears and diffrent experiences than someone else. You may not know the full story of someone elses kid.

P.S- I was kidnapped as a child and I have major worry issues with my girls. Same with my mother, she is still terrified for me. But you can't hold your child back on doing normal things, like going to a bathroom. It just causes trouble later in life.

First of all, I just want to say I'm so sorry for what happened to you when you were younger. Thank God it turned out okay. You are absolutely right....I would absolutely interfere should I see something happening. Does anyone have any reports of anything happening in a WDW restroom? I have never seen one. My DD absolutely would, and I probably would too, tell an unaccompanied boy that he was in the wrong restroom. We would think he just didn't read the sign on the door. One of the girls in the restroom may have been assaulted by a boy as well and her seeing a boy that age walk into the ladies restroom could be alarming. Again, barring special needs, I see no need for a boy that can take care of his business by himself being allowed in the ladies room, and vice versa. But, I try to see beyond the "it's just me and my family are only people I care about mentality."

To answer the OP - I would say too old for any gender is when they can take care of their business by themselves.

 

[ccgirl]

I disagree if a child can be molested at one of their waterparks, then their bathrooms do not offer anymore security to me.

A child can be molested anywhere. THere are many reports of molestations at school. Does that mean you accompany them to school? There are two reports I am aware of where teens had their chest grabbed by a male at the waterparks. Does that mean we all accompany our teenagers into the water and stand right next to them?

 

[mjkacmom]

I disagree if a child can be molested at one of their waterparks, then their bathrooms do not offer anymore security to me.

Maybe it's because it's not a single sex waterpark? Comparing a public restroom to a wave pool (where mostly naked people are being shoved into each other) is silly. No one is going to prevent a pervert from copping a feel - not a parent, not a lifeguard, not a CM.

 

[HotMama]

I have a DS 5years & DD 7years. They are both fine using the bathroom by themself. Will I just let them into any public restroom by themselves....NO. I use my gut feeling. They are my children, my job is to keep them safe. Google at the horrible things that have happened to children in public restrooms. And I do not believe just because you are at Disney nothing bad can happen. Just follow your gut feeling and do not worry about what anyone else thinks. They are YOUR children.

 

[Mkrop]

A child can be molested anywhere. THere are many reports of molestations at school. Does that mean you accompany them to school? There are two reports I am aware of where teens had their chest grabbed by a male at the waterparks. Does that mean we all accompany our teenagers into the water and stand right next to them?

At our school children of a young age are not allowed to go to the bathroom or any where in the school by themselves. And I believe the story I read was a younger child then a teen girl. It was a boy too.

 

[mjkacmom]

At our school children of a young age are not allowed to go to the bathroom or any where in the school by themselves. And I believe the story I read was a younger child then a teen girl. It was a boy too.

Hmm, must've not made the news.

 

[WantToGoNow]

I was once at a local amusement park and was at the changing table with dd - so it was a few years ago since she hasn't worn diapers since she was 2 and she's now 7. There was a women in there with 3 little girls - probably 5-7 and was changing them from their clothes to swimsuits to play in the water area - they were not in a stall but were in a corner of the restroom. A women with a boy about 7-8 came in and she completely chewed out the mother of the girls because her son shouldn't be seeing naked girls. Hello, you are in the WOMEN'S restroom - it is a place for females to do whatever they need to do - restroom, change clothes, dry clothes. If you choose to bring your son in there instead of sending him where he belongs, then you shouldl expect him to see whatever is going on. I wish Disney would follow the leadership of many local pools, waterparks and the YMCA and stop allowing people into opposite gender restrooms after a certain age.