How much does your 6 year old know about where babies come from?

[proud_canadian]

Hi there,

My older DD is 6 and has been asking a lot of questions lately about where babies come from. She has known for a long time that babies grow inside women's tummies. She always thought babies were born via c-section as that is how her and her sister were born, but I recently told her about ******l birth as well.

As for how the baby got in there, we have just been telling her magic and how a mommy and daddy really want her and God puts her in there. She also knows how babies take 9 months to grow, etc.

She also knows all about breastfeeding due to her sister being breastfed as well as cousins, etc.

Should I be telling her in more details?

What do most 6 year olds know?

Thanks.

I'm struggling with this as I don't want to scare her or inundate her with things she is too young for. But at the same time I don't want to lie to her too much and if she is old enough maybe I can share some more details?

 

[dunbarfamily]

We answer the questions they ask. Our children are very familiar with birth and such, but they have never asked "how" the baby got in my tummy. When that time comes, we'll explain it at the correct level for the child, again not giving more than what they ask for.

 

[robinb]

Hi there,

My older DD is 6 and has been asking a lot of questions lately about where babies come from. She has known for a long time that babies grow inside women's tummies. She always thought babies were born via c-section as that is how her and her sister were born, but I recently told her about ******l birth as well.

As for how the baby got in there, we have just been telling her magic and how a mommy and daddy really want her and God puts her in there. She also knows how babies take 9 months to grow, etc.

She also knows all about breastfeeding due to her sister being breastfed as well as cousins, etc.

Should I be telling her in more details?

What do most 6 year olds know?

Thanks.

I'm struggling with this as I don't want to scare her or inundate her with things she is too young for. But at the same time I don't want to lie to her too much and if she is old enough maybe I can share some more details?

I think you're doing fine . I think I talked about eggs and sperm only because I don't believe in God but since you do you can skip the messy scientific explanation until later.

ETA: I didn't explain the whole sex thing, just that the mom's egg and the dad's sperm created the embryo.

 

[MSSANDRA]

And you can combine God and science too, we did. I agree to really listen to what she is asking and answer just what she ask. We think that very young is the time to instill your moral values and what you believe as well. We would say things like, " the mommy and daddy fall in love and get married and love each other so much that want a baby to love." Depends on what you want to teach your child.

 

[kateej]

I have a couple of great books for my DD6 and DD3. One is called Amazing You, and it just basically explains the differences in body parts between boys and girls and how we each grow-- more for younger kids. The other one is called It's Not the Stork and I highly recommend it. When we first got it, DD6 was obsessed with it! It was recommended to me by my pediatrician, and another friend who is a nurse. The author Robie Harris actually has 3 versions aimed at 3 age groups -- this one is for age 4 to 7 if I'm remembering correctly. There is a page showing a man and women in a bed covered up with lots of hearts around it -- the picture isn't graphic but it does explain how it works, though it's a bit veiled. I actually mostly skip that page and go to other pages. DD love the pictures of babies in tummies -- especially seeing multiples. She told me she wanted 14 babies after we started reading this!!

All that being said, i think you're doing great! I haven't explained exactly how it happens either, but my DD has seemed satisifed with my answers so far.

 

[Evi]

if your ever in Boston the Museum of Science has a whole exhibit dedicated to how your life began http://www.mos.org/exhibits_shows/current_exhibits&d=1220
its less sexual and more science. If your lucky you'll be in town and be able to go there and when shes a little older you can have a different talk about it.

 

[indimom]

I'd say you are right on track. In general I answered their questions as they asked them. I think if they ask, they are mature enough for the answer.
I did avoid "HOW the baby got in there" until around age 10, because I wanted to make sure they would UNDERSTAND the answer, not be confused by it, and be mature enough to understand that this information isn't for sharing with younger friends/family-that other kids should talk to THEIR parents if they have questions.

 

[polkadotsuitcase]

I agree with PPs -- I think you're doing just fine. It's hard to know exactly what's enough and what's too much, but if you offer little bits and she seems satisfied, that's a good stopping point!

 

[RMulieri]

We had to answer that question recently to our 6 yr old , the mechanics and the how and the why is not something she asked just yet, but when she does we will tell her.It is not an easy subject to talk about as parents, but I would rather her know from us then to get the info elsewhere.My mom barely explained it to me, and when she did it was like some shameful thing that shouldn't be talked about.My husbands family never told them anything, they learned it from school and friends.I don't want that for my daughter

 

[Fabooliss]

I had the discussion with my 5 year old recently, kind of by accident (LOL). It started with "why did I choose Daddy to marry, and I said something about making nice babies" oops... Guess what the next question was...
I told him that part of Mommy and Daddy mixed together to make babies. Then he wanted to know how! I was vague, but did tell him the Daddy puts the sperm inside mommy's tummy and it joins the egg and makes a baby. I changed the subject when he asked how again. I decided I'd be much more comfortable explaining this at 5 than at 10!
(We had a great book we borrowed from the libary, when my daughter started asking, but he blindsided me!)

 

[Mickeypooh99]

Up until last year my boys were satisfied with the answer that God takes a part of the daddy, and a part of the mommy, and mixes it together and puts it into the mommys tummy. Then the doctor gets it out. When they asked how the doctor gets it out, I said well I'm not a doctor, but maybe if you go to school to be a doctor you will learn how.

Now when my oldest was 8 he got to learn the details. I let him read the book Its so amazing. We discussed our family values and what we believe. That mom and dad should fall in love and get married before babies. We also discussed that it doesn't always happen that way. How all families are different etc.

My now 8 year old isn't ready for the whole talk yet. I think it depends on the child.

 

[canadian_mouse]

My girls are 4 and 5 and they are very curious about everything. I answered every question honestly without giving more info than what was asked. A few months ago the 5 year old asked if the doctor had to cut the daddy open to get the sperm out and then cut the mommy open to put it in. So I told them the truth. I explained it exactly the same way that I would explain any other bodily function. I don't want it to make it appear like it's shameful by keeping it a big secret. So my kids learned at 5 and 4.

 

[Kallista]

We took a factual approach and let them ask the questions. DS#2 really drills down on information, and has to know every fact about every little thing, no matter if its about a superhero or somebody's birthday or where babies come from. We started with an egg from the mom and sperm from the dad combine in the mom's belly to grow a baby. He asked a lot of questions about how the baby grows and how is the baby born, but he finally got around to "How does a dad put his sperm in the mom, so it can combine with the egg?" I explained that the dad puts his ***** in the mom's ******. He had 14 more follow-up questions, but none of them were about sex. They were all about C-sections, because he was born by a C-section.

It really hasn't been an issue since.

He was 4 and DS#1 was 7 when we had that conversation. DS#1 didn't have any questions, but he was listening.

 

[reginaastralis]

I just had this conversation with my five year old. It started because she asked me when her daddy and I were going to give her a sister. There is just one BIG problem ... her daddy isn't around, and honestly, hasn't been around for the majority of her life ... talk about stumping me. Maybe it was a good thing, because I was able to get off "easy" with an explanation of "We're looking for a daddy who will love mommy and you so much. Then we'll know he'll be a good daddy to have brothers and sisters with."

That was enough for now ... thank goodness I'm not dating ... I don't want her to scare off a boyfriend with anymore quesitons.

I get a lot of questions about how I had her if I'm not married to her daddy, and it's confusing her to hear one thing from me and something else from school. It's a good way to remind her that each family is different, and that her daddy and I wanted her so much we were able to get her ahead of time ... but I really wish I didn't have to answer some of her questions.

 

[Ava]

When I was a kid my mom got me a book about all the different systems of the body, and it included a section on the reproductive system & where babies come from. I was probably a little older than 6 when I had this book because I know I could read it myself, so maybe I was 8 or so.

Anyway, the book illustrated each of the body systems as a machine & used that kind of language to explain how things worked. I still to this day remember the page on reproduction & the illustration of the "mom machine" & "dad machine" making a baby. The "machines" didn't look like people at all, but the "dad machine" had a long tube-looking thing that fit inside the "mom machine," and the picture showed what looked like apple seeds shooting out the end of the "dad machine" & there were hearts around the two machines I guess to show they loved each other. Obviously I was very affected (or maybe traumatized?) by this drawing that I still remember it over 20 years later.

Other than that kind of weird explanation of sex, it was a good book. I also still remember the part about the circulatory system, it showed the white blood cells as police riding around your bloodstream in little boats fighting germs.

 

[Janepod]

Anyway, the book illustrated each of the body systems as a machine & used that kind of language to explain how things worked. I still to this day remember the page on reproduction & the illustration of the "mom machine" & "dad machine" making a baby. The "machines" didn't look like people at all, but the "dad machine" had a long tube-looking thing that fit inside the "mom machine," and the picture showed what looked like apple seeds shooting out the end of the "dad machine" & there were hearts around the two machines I guess to show they loved each other. Obviously I was very affected (or maybe traumatized?) by this drawing that I still remember it over 20 years later.

I had this book and it confused me HORRIBLY! One machine was red and the other was blue. When I found out how things really work I kept picturing the book ... what a horrible piece of misinfo to have out there.

 

[jen2207]

Funny story - When my oldest daughter was born, we just had our son (2yrs) at that time. When he came to the hospital to see mommy and his new sister he must have seen a helicopter there for a patient transfer. For years he would tell people that "Mommy went to the hospital and the helicopter brought the baby." lol!!

Now that I am pregnant with baby #4 and the kids are 10, 7 and 4 - we've had a wide range of questions about babies and how they get in mommy's tummy and how they are going to get out!! My 10 yr old is the least interested - must be a 10yr old boy thing........ But the neighbor kids and my kids classmates are very interested. I've just kept it very vague and said that "the baby will come out when it is ready and the doctor will help get the baby out." I feel no need to be the Sex Ed teacher for the neighborhood!!! lol!!

 

[mjkacmom]

Well, when my twins were 6, and my other dd8, we were watching a movie, "Multiples in the Womb." After it was over, they asked how the sperm got to the egg. I said "do you really want to know" and they said "yes." So now we know. My older kids were almost 10 when they found out. It was much easier telling 6 and 8 year olds! I remember my gf telling me her ds still believed she swallowed a magic seed - he was 11! That poor kid is going to make a fool out of himself when his friends are talking about sex!

 

[mjkacmom]

Funny story - When my oldest daughter was born, we just had our son (2yrs) at that time. When he came to the hospital to see mommy and his new sister he must have seen a helicopter there for a patient transfer. For years he would tell people that "Mommy went to the hospital and the helicopter brought the baby." lol!!

Now that I am pregnant with baby #4 and the kids are 10, 7 and 4 - we've had a wide range of questions about babies and how they get in mommy's tummy and how they are going to get out!! My 10 yr old is the least interested - must be a 10yr old boy thing........ But the neighbor kids and my kids classmates are very interested. I've just kept it very vague and said that "the baby will come out when it is ready and the doctor will help get the baby out." I feel no need to be the Sex Ed teacher for the neighborhood!!! lol!!

Your kids don't know how the baby gets out? Seriously, your 10 year old is old enough for the full disclosure - he's already hearing stuff on the playground, and if you don't have a comfortable open dialogue at this age, you won't have one later one. I can still have a non-embarrassing conversation about STD's, puberty, oral sex, etc., with ds12, and even with dd14.

 

[riley2008]

Your kids don't know how the baby gets out? Seriously, your 10 year old is old enough for the full disclosure - he's already hearing stuff on the playground, and if you don't have a comfortable open dialogue at this age, you won't have one later one. I can still have a non-embarrassing conversation about STD's, puberty, oral sex, etc., with ds12, and even with dd14.

I think the previous poster was referring to not wanting to fully disclose to her kids' friends and classmates.