Yes. DS has some trouble with sensory integration disorder adn this is something that we have learned too. He can't eat cooked vegies. He will throw up and it is not on purpose. He can eat raw vegies--same ones as the ones he can't eat cooked.
So, while I do not act as a short order cook, I have also learned NOT to make this child try even a bite. I am willing to find something comparable in the whole scheme of nutrition. For instance, tonight we had baked potatoes. Not a texture he can handle so he got a piece of wheat bread with butter instead.
If I am making something that I KNOW my kids dont like, they are also free to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. There are times I just really want to make chilli but I know my middle one does not like it, for instance. As an adult I don't want to be limited by what all three of my kids like or don't like, however, I also respect that as long as they have tried something in the past and don't care for it then I offer them another choice.
However, if you whine, you leave the room and I don't care if you are hungry.
While I was on vacation, I saw 2 groups of young adults (18-25) ordering at a restaurant mac & cheese and/or chicken nuggets.
Does anyone have such a fussy eater that they will literally throw up over something they dislike? At 4 years old we fed our son spaghetti one night - he didn't like the feel of the noodles in his mouth. Threw up all over the dinner table including in the salad bowl. At 5 years old we had Domino's pizza thin crust version one night (usually order the hand tossed type) and he threw up again! Note, son is now 7 and eats a very, very limited # of foods.
Hubby is a very fussy eater - for years I thought he was just being a baby. But after having our son I'd tell you it's a genetic thing he passed on. Son has always been like this, even as a very young baby before he was old enough to play food games - would literally gag up the peas and rice gerber food at 12 mo. old.
I love most any type of food so this is a never ending, exhausting and messy battle. Help!
I have met too many kids whose parents bring a pb&j EVERYWHERE because the kid won't eat anything else.
. . . Me: "Oh well, I'm sorry to hear that. Breakfast is tomorrow morning at 7am" . . .
My kids definitely don't have that problem, despite the PB&J allowance - so it isn't the PB&J allowance that is causing unreasonable levels of pickiness in the children you know. Mine eat pad thai, palak paneer, smoked salmon, kim chee, calamari, sushi and snails. (Last time we went out to a place that served "slugs" they comp'd my eight year old daughter's dessert - the entire kitchen was standing in the door to watch an eight year old eat escargot.) They eat them with varying differences - she'll eat snails and squid - he passes, he'll eat pad thai, she sticks with satay. More traditionally, he'll eat chili, she won't touch it, he passes on broiled chicken. They definitely aren't "picky" eaters in the traditional sense of "nothing but mac n cheese and PB&J" - however, there are foods they don't like (and, in case you can't tell from the above, we have presented some challenging options to our kids over the years - there are adults with more limited palates) - and PB&J allows us an option that keeps everyone content.
I used these words when serving dinner, upon hearing "EW!" or "I don't want that"
Me: "Oh well, I'm sorry to hear that. Breakfast is tomorrow morning at 7am".
Seriously, if they get hungry enough they'll eat. They won't starve, and the more you cater to what they want the less they'll even consider trying other stuff. I wouldn't make them eat a lot of what is 'new' to them, but if they finally do try a spoon or two of a new food and still turn their nose up, be proud of them for trying and give them a bowl of cereal. Eventually, they'll tire of cereal as well and learn to like the 'new' stuff.