Homework at Disney World

[deegack]

When I missed school for my grandfather's funeral the only thing the school said was "so very sorry for your loss, let us know if there's anything we can do to help." I can't begin to imagine a situation when any school - preschool through college - would be anything but sympathetic and supportive of students whose loved one just died. (And really, it's not unusual for a grandparent of a high school kid to die, so you'd think they'd have a reasonable and comforting policy in place!!!)
Vacations we can argue about until the cows come home, but funerals? Who the heck does that Principal think she is? Totally blown away by this...

Unfortunately grandparents seem to die often around exam time in college. One of my former jobs was in a college student services and I was required to get copies of death certificates before releasing makeup exams to professors for grading. I could allow the student to take a makeup exam but it sat locked in my office until I got the copy. Death annoucements in newspapers, funeral cards, letters from funeral homes all not allowed because people had fakes them in the past to get out of exams. It's sad but true.

 

[DopeyDame]

Your policy sounds reasonable - ask for proof. (Although a death certificate seems over the top to me, certainly for grade school/ high school.) But once it's proven (or you chose to believe it without proof) than be reasonable and sympathetic!

 

[DopeyDame]

Death annoucements in newspapers, funeral cards, letters from funeral homes all not allowed because people had fakes them in the past to get out of exams. It's sad but true.

And really, the amount of time it would take to fake an obit in a newspaper would FAR outweigh any benefit the kid would get from taking the test a few days later...
I teach at a community college and typically let students makeup exams just based on their word alone - I chose to believe my students and accept that every once in a while a kid may get the 'advantage' of taking an exam at a different time then the rest of the students. I can live with that if it means that I treat my students with respect and compasion.

 

[disykat]

Personally, I think if you DON'T do any makeup work after missing school, you're teaching your kids that there's no reason to bother going in the first place. The last thing I want is for my kids to feel like is that their presence at school is inconsequential.

Do people seriously believe that they do nothing worthwhile at school? If so, why do you send your kids?

You don't need to do homework DURING your trip, start before and work on it after - no big deal. During the trip, you can have them do some of it if it fits in, like having them read tourist info for their reading log.

The only time I've taken my children out, my oldest was in first grade and we went to Hawaii for my brother's wedding. He didn't really have homework assigned so I had him write in a daily journal. When we got back, I helped him work on a little presentation for his class for show and tell about some things he'd seen on his trip. I wanted him to know that missing school is a big deal. I felt like he grew skillwise during that time rather than just skipping it.

OP, I'm glad you did the homework and happy that it turned out to be much ado about nothing.

 

[Arabelle]

A death certificate is extreme. The number that would go to the extreme of faking an obit is few. A student who has dealt with loss and stupid rules is not going to be at their best which is what instructors should want.

 

[Arabelle]

Disycat, I think that your example is extreme. Many kids can miss a week without affect. That doesn't mean school is worthless, it usually means that they tend toward repetition which isn't necessary for 1/3 of the students using that bell curve.

I would have done as the op, and finished it early. We would not do it on vacation, and if it were extreme busywork it might not be finished. My kids would he a lesson in choices and consequences.

 

[LilyWDW]

Here is the thing...

When you decide to send your child to a school, you agree to the rules and regulations set by that school. If you don't like them, then you have other choices. If you decided to stay and don't follow the rules, then you accept the consequences of those actions.

 

[deegack]

And really, the amount of time it would take to fake an obit in a newspaper would FAR outweigh any benefit the kid would get from taking the test a few days later...
I teach at a community college and typically let students makeup exams just based on their word alone - I chose to believe my students and accept that every once in a while a kid may get the 'advantage' of taking an exam at a different time then the rest of the students. I can live with that if it means that I treat my students with respect and compasion.

I treated all my students with the utmost respect and compassion. There was a big problem several years before I started working there with grandparents dying and stuff being faked. So the faculty put the policy in place. Now instead of the sure yeah right, some of the students were given when they went to make up an exam, I was able to tell the professor when he went to grade the paper that the persons relative did actually die. Once I explained the policy and reason behind it every student understood and was able to provide the documentation.

 

[DopeyDame]

I treated all my students with the utmost respect and compassion. There was a big problem several years before I started working there with grandparents dying and stuff being faked. So the faculty put the policy in place. Now instead of the sure yeah right, some of the students were given when they went to make up an exam, I was able to tell the professor when he went to grade the paper that the persons relative did actually die. Once I explained the policy and reason behind it every student understood and was able to provide the documentation.

I definitely didn't mean to imply that you weren't the one without respect or compasion - you're implementing your schools policy - I get that.
The PPs high school who gave them a hard time for missing school that didn't have the respect and compasion!

And, frankly, I do think it's a bit of an incomapsionate rule that your faculty has put in place. I am truly suprised that everyone was able to produce a death certificate in a timely manner. My Great Uncle died last week and DS and I went to the funeral. A 'great uncle' isn't typically a close relationship, but in this case it was someone who had been very important in my life and it was important to me to go. I'm sure I COULD have asked my aunt for a copy of the death certificate if I needed to, but I would have felt sooooo awkward and uncomfortable doing that in her time of grief.

Again, though, my big issue isn't with the asking for proof or not asking for proof - I don't see anything wrong with asking for some sort of proof. BUT, once you get that proof - back off and let the students deal with their greif (which it sounds like your school does and PPs school did not).

 

[labst60]

Just curious - do death certificates take as long to produce as birth certificates? It was always several weeks before I got the "official state birth certificate" for my kids. Sure, I had "proof of birth", but it sounds like PPs school wanted a copy of the official certificate.

(Yes, I realize this is completely OT from the OPs first post! The posts about the death certificate just made me wonder the logistics of that!)

 

[chimilady]

If the teacher took the time to get the homework together for you, then I think you should take the time to do it.

The year my DS was in 3rd grade he had the most homework on our Disney trip. I really thought it was over the top. My boys are A students, and most teachers don't bother giving them homework. They easily catch up when we get back. But, I always ask the teacher, and I have enough respect for her that we will do whatever she sends with us.

We worked on my DS's homework a little every day, and then on the plane ride home. He finished all of it, and ended up being ahead of the class when we returned. I wouldn't change a thing about that trip.

^^ Yup, that!

 

[MSSANDRA]

When my dad died, we had the death certificate in hand by the funeral three days after he died. For my mom, it took about two weeks. Same funeral service,same town etc. It can sooo vary.

I understand why schools have gotten to the point where they think they need to require some type of prof, but it is sad and makes a hard time even harder. My older DS was in middle school when my dad died and high when my mom died and we had a message from one principal and several teachers both times before we even got back to our house after leaving the care facility letting us know they were sorry and to not worry about school at all. SOOO nice.

I have more than a few times heard parents comment (both on the boards and in real life) that if the school are not ok with trips to WDW, they might just have an aunt in Florida pass away. That is what makes it harder on everyone.

 

[Aliceacc]

For what it's worth, I disagree with the 2 choices on the poll.

It's not about "keeping the peace."

I say she does the homework because it's part of the course requirement. And because the homework is practice on the material the other kids will be learning that week. And because this "good teacher" believes it to be necessary for your daughter to master the material.

If a child is home throwing up, or in real pain, or in the hospital, or at a family funeral, the work can wait. If the family has chosen to take a vacation over school time, I would fully expect that an effort would be made to do at least the same homework as every other member of the class.

If the homework policy is extreme, that probably should have been brought to the attention of administration several months ago. Complaining about it from a Disney World vacation doesn't give the claim a whole lot of credibility.