Handheld Games in Line: Any Advice?

[ZeroMyHero]

I apologize in advance because this is so long. Sorry!

My DD10 has ADHD and ODD and takes medication for the ADHD. It works well for her and has improved her focus and really helps her control her anger and outbursts. This will be our first trip to WDW with her on medication. I think it will be better than past trips because she really understands her situation well now and we have all made many changes to help her succeed.

The rule has always been that her handheld devices (iPod and Nintendo 3DS) had to stay behind in the room when we visited the parks. There was enough to see in line to keep her distracted and we were able to use FP to our advantage to cut down on waiting. Now that she is older (she will be 11 when we travel), I am considering allowing her to bring her devices into the parks. She has more maturity and self control now and it is easier to talk her down during an angry episode, and these episodes are far less frequent than they used to be thanks to therapy and medication. Also, because the standby lines for all attractions seem to be longer than they were before the implementation of FP+, I am concerned that she will get bored/less stimulated faster now while waiting in line, so using a device for a bit might help to pass the time and keep her mood from nosediving.

However, I have misgivings because DD10 is *obsessed* with video games and videos of people talking about and playing video games. They dominate every conversation she has with other people, which is okay, but I worry she will want to play them constantly while we stand in line for an attraction or sit and wait for the start of a show. If she plays them for too long, she becomes irrationally angry and defiant when she is asked to stop. This anger can last for hours and has occasionally made touring the parks difficult because she shuts down and doesn't want to do anything but be angry.

DH thinks it would be okay to let her bring her handhelds into the parks this time. She would carry them in her own bag and be responsible for them, and I trust his judgement on this because he has ADHD, too, so he really understands how she feels. But, he also tends to spend a lot of time playing on his phone even when we aren't standing in line at WDW and I don't want to lose two family members to devices, especially on vacation. We have never used a GAC and will not get a DAS as I don't think it is really necessary for us. Should I let her bring the devices in or is this a slippery slope I should avoid? We have two months before our trip and I'd like to prepare DD10 as much as possible. She doesn't react well to surprises or changes in routine if we don't discuss them beforehand. Any advice from you, especially if you've been in my place, would be really helpful. Thank you!

 

[nikkislaght]

My son has ADHD, OCD and SPD , like your daughter he can get caught up in the games. I ask that he stand in line for at least 5 minutes before asking for the game , depending on the length of one of course . Our understanding is that he won't spend the whole day talking about the games etc . We have a " break word we Use to let him know we are done listening to him without us nagging him . If he continues on he looses the game for awhile . Maybe you could come up with a system like that . Between doing sensory stuff in line, feeding him and chatting about what we will do next, we can get away with not using the device sometime for. Good portion of the day ..

 

[Aladora]

We have allowed our son to bring his DS to the parks every trip and will continue to do so as long as it helps him cope with how overwhelming it can be. He is autistic and we do get a DAS but using his game allows us to use the DAS less and less each trip.

As for preparing your child for the trip, I find that talking about what to expect really helps especially if you talk about how plans might change. Figuring out coping strategies in advance will help as well.

 

[ZeroMyHero]

Thank you, nikkislaght and Aladora, for your responses. I especially like the idea of a "break" word. Thanks again to you both.

 

[lisahoo]

Would it help your daughter to have another in-line activity? My HFA 10 year old DD has similar issues with video games, we have found she gets out of control after too much screen time (refusing to quit and becoming defiant afterward on seemingly unrelated issues), so we try to limit the amount of time she uses device (i.e. 20 minutes at a time). I created drawing kits for both of my girls from old DVD cases (plans on Pinterest if you're interested) for the trip and they both loved them.

When DD got overwhelmed after fireworks, I did break out the iPad and that did the trick to her to calm down.

BTW, I would think about getting the DAS. You don't have to use it, and sometimes having a 'secret weapon' helps me to handle what might be a challenging situation. It would not have been possible for us to meet Elsa & Anna or to ride Test Track a second time without it. If her mood might become an issue while waiting, that seems like a valid reason to get the DAS to me.

YMMV, of course. I hope you have a wonderful trip!!

 

[ZeroMyHero]

Great ideas, lisahoo. My DD10 enjoys drawing on paper but right now really loves to draw on Pokemon Art Academy on her 3DS. The art kits you suggested are really cool and I might make one for DD5, but I think DD10 won't have much interest, unfortunately, next to her device. I did purchase a Hidden Mickeys book for DD10 that I am saving for either the plane ride or our first day on property. She likes getting as much information as possible about subjects that she is hyper-focused on, and while Disney isn't quite in that category, I think knowing that she can find the Mickeys before the rest of us will appeal to her. She pin-traded a little bit during earlier trips but she never really understood the concept of getting pins you don't like to trade for ones you do like. She might get that now, but I don't know how much trading she'll be able to do in line, you know? I can ask her about it and see if she wants to bring her lanyard or get some pins she's not interested in for trading. She's very chatty but, like I said before, tends to only want to talk about 2 or 3 specific subjects. It doesn't occur to her that some kids don't want to talk about video games or Pokemon for hours on end. She has had luck in the past but wasn't so limited in her topics for conversation then, either.

I will probably let her take the 3DS into the parks but will put a serious time limit on her usage, asking her to look at her book or try to make friends in line before she resorts to screen time. I'm still leaning towards not getting a DAS, or at least not right away. If time in line is truly unbearable, we can get one later in our stay, I think? Anyway, thanks to the three of you for your input. If anyone else has ideas or advice, I'd welcome it.

 

[JennyDrake]

How about a BOOK????

 

[ZeroMyHero]

I mentioned that I purchased a Hidden Mickeys book for DD10 for the plane or our first day on property in my last post. As for a regular novel, DD10 has a lot of trouble focusing on books. Although she is a strong reader, she struggles to get through books she has to read for school, so I don't think she will choose to read a book for fun while in line. That's what I would have been doing at her age, but she's different from me.