Going with my mom in May

[BrerEthan]

Hey there-- am 26 year old mousejunkie and decided I needed a vacation this year. Most of my friends are broke or busy so I decided to ask my mom to go to Disney with me.

As an adult, my mother and I have had a much better relationship then we were when I was a kid. I am a little bit nervous for sure about spending so much time with her, but she hasn't been to Disney since the early 90s and is really excited. She is very active (early 60s) and definitely loves Disney.

I'm looking at this trip as a way to connect with her on a different level and hopefully help bring us closer.

I've realized, as an adult, you can't really hold on to things from your childhood that have bothered you, anymore. You have only one life and one family and I think that this would be a great opportunity to share one of my greatest loves (Disney) with my mom.

Has any one traveled as an adult, with their parent? I'd love to see if anyone has had a similar experience and had any tips or tricks that made the trip fun, organized and stress free?

We are staying at POR and going for 6 days in May.

Thank you!

 

[KateB]

Hey! I am currently planning a trip with my DM in June. We took my parents 2 years ago and had an among but way too short trip. We really had a good time even though my dad isn't a huge Disney fan. My mom & I have our moments and when we decided to do this trip we laid down a few ground rules. The most important was that we are going to have and we are both probably going to get tired & kind of cranky at some point. We agreed that if one of us gets moody we are going to let it go. My mom is a huge disney fan too so I know that we will have fun. Just remind each other that you are there to have fun and to make memories (preferably happy).

I hope that you have a good trip & make sure to take lots of pictures!

 

[vhartwell]

My mom and I take a vacation together every year. This will be our 3rd Disney Trip because DH hates Disney...I know...let's not get into that.

We have a lot of fun. We both pick out places we want to eat and see. Just take it one day at a time and enjoy yourself!!!!

 

[kwdw]

Jealous, jealous, jealous. I think adult daughter and mom trips are awesome. Sure, you'll have that same spat you always do at some point, but you'll also have great times. If you get along well enough to invite her in the first place, you'll be fine. I had some great trips with my mom at about your age, since my dad had passed away and we were both single gals. We did some crazy stuff nobody would have guessed we would, we went to bed early, we stayed up too late, we fought, we apologized, we were boring, we were silly. We had fun. It was great. My mom died quickly of breast cancer in her early 60s, so since I no longer have her.... Those vacation memories...even the crappy night in the hotel with no water.....are awesome memories! Have fun!

 

[BrerEthan]

Hey sorry if I was confusing...but I am a dude haha, so it will most definitely NOT be a mom/daughter trip but a mom/son trip....

thanks for the feedback, regardless

 

[tammyroo]

I think it's great that you're open to this opportunity with your mom.
As a mom of a 20yo son, I hope we can have that time of relationship in the years to come. He's been with us on many trips to WDW and loves it. He tends to be a night owl and I'm not so no matter who I'm traveling with to WDW I always state up front that everyone is responsible for meeting their own needs...i.e. if you want to sleep in and I don't fine, then I don't have to wait on you to go to the parks or if I want to go back early you don't have to feel obligated to go back with me. Sometimes too much togetherness is not a good thing.
On another note, I tried to get my own mom to go with us several times in the last 10 years. By that time she was in her late 70s/early 80s and initially didn't want to intrude on our family vacation but later declined due to health reasons. She would have LOVED WDW especially at Christmas. You will never regret this trip with her no matter how it turns out.
Hope you have a great time!

 

[amyro]

My father and I are currently planning a trip for this summer. So any posts will be helpful for me as well. This will be our first father/daughter trip and were both really excited! We've always gotten along well so hopefully that stands true during a week together lol

 

[BrerEthan]

Great advice tammyroo. Making expectations clear will definitely be on the to do list. She already said if I wanted to go out at night by myself or whatever, that she was fine with that and she said she may want to do her own thing at some point too. I think making it clear that an adult Disney vacation, while great for family bonding, doesn't need to be spent the entire time together. Especially since I plan on hitting up MK a few different times and wanna try Sorcerers of MK which I don't think she'll be interested in. I will definitely share my feedback as the trip gets closer and we go! I'm so stoked.

 

[BrerEthan]

Amyro, I will keep you updated as well!

 

[AquaDame]

I have traveled with my parents a few times now - I think they like it more than I do though! My biggest tip would be to get separate adjoining rooms if you can afford it! After three trips with them I am spent and don't think I can do it anymore because they both snore HORRIBLY and my Mom takes forever to get ready which means the lights are on by 5am daily to make it to rope drop at 8 but she also makes my Dad shower first so he can get the coffee so he walks around like a zombie... I took to showering at night in the hopes they would give a little on the AM wakeup but it didn't help much since it only takes me 20 minutes tops.

Other than needing space for a period of time daily I would say do it like you would with kids. Have a good plan, let her pick some things or at least agree to what you have planned and then go in with a loosey goosey attitude. KNOW your Mom as best you can! What she likes, what she doesn't like and what not to do to set her off and really try not to do it! If she gets overheated or tired or changes her mind you being OK with it is going to make a world of difference and vice versa. It helps no one to stand in the park and bicker about things so know ahead of time what the solution will be. Split up for awhile? Push her through it? Give in and do something else? Decide ahead of time who is paying for what also - that way you aren't fighting over who gets to pay the bill. Know what her budget is and stick to it or else she might be stressing out which could lead to arguments too (especially if she isn't the sort to come out and tell you why she is unhappy). Make sure she packs for the weather and her preference - if she tends to get cold have her bring an extra jacket, too hot, invest in a fan or cooling cloth.

 

[scdak]

I've been traveling to Disney with my mother for 30+ years, in fact was there last week with her (73) and my nephews (5, 14) and all of us came back without killing anyone!
I have found that Mom and I need some time to ourselves every day, when I stayed at POR last year I went out for walks at night, sat in the counterservice area and drank hot chocolate while reading a book for a while. This trip (off site) I spent time out on the screened in porch alone or with my best friend, and Mom stayed inside to watch TV. The idea of a separate room is good if you can afford it but that is not always possible. One of the main reasons for staying offsite this trip was to give everyone alot of space, so I rented a 3 bedroom condo and that worked great for us.

 

[Joyce Kingkade]

First of all I think it's great you are doing a mom, son trip. My 25 year old son and I are going in May also!! My son has autism, so I know it will be a little different than your situation, but I still want this to be an awesome trip for him. Remember Mother's Day is in May, so maybe you could plan a special meal in honor of her celebrating that day. I don't know when you will be there, but it wouldn't have to be right on Mother's Day. The Afternoon Tea at the Grand Floridian would be nice, or any little celebration you could do for her would make her feel so special!! Have a great time showing her the "world"!!

 

[smcabee]

Having lost both of my parents, I would just say forget about anything negative that you may have had in the past and work toward a great future. There are many times I wish I had spent more quality time with my mom and dad and let petty things get in the way.

 

[rocknroll]

I took my 74 year old mom on a cruise and three days WDW last year. I learned more about what made her tick and about me than I would have imagined. No chance this year of doing it again due to her getting knee surgery and have my fingers crossed that we can go next year.

Here are some nuggets (don't know if they qualify as advice) I can pass on about my travel with mom: moms can get tipsy; moms can get righteously indignant; timeouts are as great for adults as they are for kids; bring an extra electronic reading device because once she has yours forget it; will sample your food; worry that you are not eating enough; walk too slow; etc...but when you hear her laughing so hard she is snorting because you are soaked from head to toe while she somehow doesn't even have her hair wet or she is on the phone telling her 5 year old grandson that she got to meet the real Mickey Mouse and how happy she is or that she is eating a "simple" dish that she has prepared for us for her entire life and she has so enamored the staff that they have made if for her...well let's just say you will know you did good "kid".

Cheers!

RR

 

[BrerEthan]

Great stuff!! Thank you so much to everyone for all the input.

 

[Gamegrl1]

My biggest tip would be to get separate adjoining rooms if you can afford it! After three trips with them I am spent and don't think I can do it anymore because they both snore HORRIBLY and my Mom takes forever to get ready which means the lights are on by 5am daily to make it to rope drop at 8...
Have a good plan, let her pick some things or at least agree to what you have planned and then go in with a loosey goosey attitude. KNOW your Mom as best you can!

Ok, AquaBabe pretty much said it all and it's making me laugh because I travelled with mom a couple years ago to visit relatives who put us in the same room and I got practically NO SLEEP that week because she snores like a freight train which is why we, too, are getting separate rooms when she and I go next January.

Went to Disneyland with both mom and dad last fall and had a great time but it's because we all like pretty much the same stuff and were fairly clear on what to expect. I'd say review expectations of how early/late you want to sleep, go to the parks or wherever, where to eat and how much you like to eat when and if one of you wants to do something the other doesn't, can you compromise or split up for a bit?

BrerEthan, is your mom a planner? I see she hasn't been in about 20 years so it's probably really different now with a couple new parks and big changes. We've never been and my mom doesn't like to plan so what's making her happy is for me to learn about WDW and then all she has to do is let me show her what they have to offer and let her pick what she thinks sounds good to do. Other than that she just packs her bag and shows up. She's very sweet and we are pretty good travelling companions. But she doesn't travel super often so she gets stressed during the "travel" parts (like leaving the house and at the airport) so the more I can handle so she doesn't have to, the better.

Other than that, I think just being as prepared physically as she can - impress on her how big this place is and that they have a lot to do and that she won't be able to do it all. Do whatever it takes - spending the $, resting, stopping, sleeping - to have fun. If she's paying her half, help her up front to get a good idea of the prices for your trip so she won't have sticker shock when you get there...that could take some fun out of it.

And wear comfy shoes. And take lots of pics & video. And take hand wipes on the plane and stuff to help you not get sick in case there are cooties.

 

[katt789]

I surprised my Mom with a trip for just the two of us last Sept, and we're going again this Sept as she really did love it!

Obviously, with your Mom being, your Mom, there can, and probably will be moments that get a little tense, even on vacation, but just let everyone cool down, maybe get some sugar and into the shade for a bit and it will all calm down.

I lucked out as I had been to Disney so many times that I'm the person who doesn't need a map, and knows what to do when, and Mom knew that so she was content just doing what I had planned.

I also played up things I knew she would like, and things that might get her some special attention. She loves all things Africa, so we stayed at AKL, and ha extra time planned at AK to absorb everything. It was also near her birthday so I noted that on the adr's and had a bday button for her.

It was an absolutely amazing experience and I know she loved every minute of it, the most magical was definitely seeing her being pulled out in to the street at the Move It Shake It and Timon would only dance with her. It's kinda the same as seeing Disney through your kids eyes (I assume ahha] as you're sharing this magic with someone you love so much and it truly is amazing!!