Found Grumpy on the Disney Wonder 6/7 Sailing

[malonefamily]

I found Grumpy on the Disney Wonder's Alaskan sailing from June 7th, and I'm afraid it wasn't with Snow White. My family was watching DisneyNature African Cats in the Buena Vista theater waiting to pull into Ketchikan (it was nearly my 3 year old's nap time) while holding and barely rocking him to sleep. Just as he was dozing off there was a BIG (hard as she could manage I would guess) kick against the back of the seat. I ignored it assuming she had fallen or something, but a moment later she began screaming at me for moving. Yikes.

It was so bizarre. When she yelled I turned and said, "I'm just rocking the baby to sleep, and didn't intend to bother you." She said it "hurt her knees" (now I'm about 6 feet tall and my knees didn't touch the seat in front of me, so I don't know what her story was - in a million years I never would have guessed the tiny movement we made would bother anyone - it was surely better than a fussy preschooler!). Then I finally realized that she'd just kicked us, and very, very hard (such an odd thing it took me a while to realize that's what had happened). So I said, "Did you kick us on purpose then?" And she said "Yes." Everyone in the central part of the theater just sort of turned in shock to look at her. I said simply, "Wow" and turned around and tried to hold very still for the last 40 minutes of the show, with a now wide awake and fussy 3 year old I probably should have just left.

After the movie was over I told her crossly that if she kicked me or one of my children again she could explain it to Disney security, and she took off. Here's the question for more experienced cruisers: How should I have dealt with this? Should I have called security at the time? Should I have ignored it? Moved to another seat mid-show in a crowded theater? If I had snapped an iPhone picture of her and taken it to security would they have acted on it?

I resisted the urge to complain to anyone at Guest Services (I've heard complaints about other passengers are their most common headache, and what can they really do about that?). I just feel like I didn't handle it in the best possible way. We had a great time anyway, but I won't deny that it took a few hours to shake off that unpleasant experience.

 

[cyclenut]

I found Grumpy on the Disney Wonder's Alaskan sailing from June 7th, and I'm afraid it wasn't with Snow White. My family was watching DisneyNature African Cats in the Buena Vista theater waiting to pull into Ketchikan (it was nearly my 3 year old's nap time) while holding and barely rocking him to sleep. Just as he was dozing off there was a BIG (hard as she could manage I would guess) kick against the back of the seat. I ignored it assuming she had fallen or something, but a moment later she began screaming at me for moving. Yikes.

It was so bizarre. When she yelled I turned and said, "I'm just rocking the baby to sleep, and didn't intend to bother you." She said it "hurt her knees" (now I'm about 6 feet tall and my knees didn't touch the seat in front of me, so I don't know what her story was - in a million years I never would have guessed the tiny movement we made would bother anyone - it was surely better than a fussy preschooler!). Then I finally realized that she'd just kicked us, and very, very hard (such an odd thing it took me a while to realize that's what had happened). So I said, "Did you kick us on purpose then?" And she said "Yes." Everyone in the central part of the theater just sort of turned in shock to look at her. I said simply, "Wow" and turned around and tried to hold very still for the last 40 minutes of the show, with a now wide awake and fussy 3 year old I probably should have just left.

After the movie was over I told her crossly that if she kicked me or one of my children again she could explain it to Disney security, and she took off. Here's the question for more experienced cruisers: How should I have dealt with this? Should I have called security at the time? Should I have ignored it? Moved to another seat mid-show in a crowded theater? If I had snapped an iPhone picture of her and taken it to security would they have acted on it?

I resisted the urge to complain to anyone at Guest Services (I've heard complaints about other passengers are their most common headache, and what can they really do about that?). I just feel like I didn't handle it in the best possible way. We had a great time anyway, but I won't deny that it took a few hours to shake off that unpleasant experience.

It was clearly wrong for this person to kick your seat (although I was thinking when I read this that she kicked your chair and not you) but it seems to me that you handled it appropriately. It would clearly have been more appropriate for her to ask you to please stop. There is little that can be done by the crew in these situations and your choice really is to move to another seat, leave the theater or stay where you are but stop rocking the chair.

 

[3bears]

I think you handled yourself very well. Its always after time you think "I shoulda/coulda/woulda...." I DO think I would have excused myself then and there and went ahead and had a cast member come get her out of there to explain that most people learn to keep their hands and feet to themselves in preschool. She couldn't have used her big girl words to explain poiltely that your seat was bumping her knees??? Good for you for keeping your cool. You set a good mommy example for your kiddos. Once at a movie theater, we saw 2 police cars outside, one we got in we realized it was due to a complaint by a woman that a man kicked her seat. I could not help by overhear that the man was tired of hearing her on her CELL PHONE DURING THE MOVIE, after 3 times of asking her to get off, she refused, and he actually kicked her seat. These were NOT teenagers...grown adults...crazy!!! At least he asked first, but to kick the womans seat??

 

[malonefamily]

It was clearly wrong for this person to kick your seat (although I was thinking when I read this that she kicked your chair and not you) but it seems to me that you handled it appropriately. It would clearly have been more appropriate for her to ask you to please stop. There is little that can be done by the crew in these situations and your choice really is to move to another seat, leave the theater or stay where you are but stop rocking the chair.

Right, she didn't kick us directly, she kicked the top portion of the back of the seat with remarkable vigor. I guess my final remark to her was a bit misleading, but I was quite exasperated. I guess even if security had seen it directly it's possible they would not have acted... it was a borderline incident. Awful, but not outright violence.

Who gets on a Disney cruise and kicks the heck out of the backs of the seats of sleeping children (even if you somehow think you've been wronged)? When you get away with things like that do you then escalate to even more overt aggression?

 

[clten]

Can I ask, were you in the next to last row and she in the very last row (not the handicapped seating area)? If so, the mistake was completely hers (well, kicking the seat was completely her juvenile mistake anyway). What she may not have known is the the last row of the BV theather is very narrow. Whether you were rocking or not, your seat would have been pressing on her knees.

As far as security doing anything about it -- whether you went to them at that moment or after the movie, I don't think they would have done anything more than asked her not to do it in the future. So, as annoying as the incident was, I don't know that you could have done much more. (If I wasn't going to inconvience a lot of people in my row, I might have moved.) Good for you for not letting it impact your overall enjoyment of the cruise.

 

[SanDiegoSteph]

Actually this woman committed battery against you - an actionable civil offense. Now granted, it would not be worth your time or energy to sue her of course, but I just wanted you to feel comfortable in the fact that you were certainly in your right to feel harmed by her actions.

I do agree with the folks' comments prior that your calm but stern response was a good example for your kiddos as it sounds like this gal may have been a bit "off" and you certainly would not have wanted her to strike out at you further with your family there.

 

[CrystalS]

When I first read this I thought that you must be talking about a young child kicking your seat and acting that way! But I'm assuming now that it was a grown woman?!?
That is ridiculous! If your rocking was bothering or hurting her in anyway, you'd think the first logical thing for her to do would be to say "excuse me, your rocking is bothering/hurting me, could you stop". But to just go ahead and kick your chair, that's just rude and moronic if you ask me!

I probably would have done similar to what you did. I mean, clearly you weren't doing it to bother/hurt her on purpose, you were rocking your child to sleep. Some people just don't have the logic or grace to handle things calmly and rationally.
I think your response was fine.

 

[HappyontheLake]

Right, she didn't kick us directly, she kicked the top portion of the back of the seat with remarkable vigor. I guess my final remark to her was a bit misleading, but I was quite exasperated. I guess even if security had seen it directly it's possible they would not have acted... it was a borderline incident. Awful, but not outright violence.

Who gets on a Disney cruise and kicks the heck out of the backs of the seats of sleeping children (even if you somehow think you've been wronged)? When you get away with things like that do you then escalate to even more overt aggression?

I would have taken her picture -- if that had been my teenage son's seat, it would have jarred his neck enough to set his rehab back months (debilatating upper back injury 19 months ago). It is assault to deliberately kick someone's seat that hard. I would have taken her picture and walked out immediately. I am not the quiet sufferer. I am the Disney guest who reports every single smoker who is on the Deck 4 jogging track between 6am and 6pm -- so don't do it!

It is one thing to accidentally fall into the back of someone's seat (going in and out of rows from bathroom trips), jar a seat while crossing and uncrossing legs (our family of amazons and giants are guilty of that -- aforementioned son is 6'6") but her actions are beyond the pale.

 

[roxy84]

Wow. I really can't believe some people. She really should have asked you nicely to stop or move seats but in no way should she kick you with force, especially since you had a child in your lap.

I don't think anything could have been done afterwards - as there probably wasn't any proof. Disney would most likely do something nice for your family but nothing would be solved. The best thing you could have done would be to get up right away, contact guest services to get security to meet you at the theater. While there you could have identified the woman, and the people around you would be witnesses. What would have happened after - I'm not sure. I've heard that people can be kicked off the cruise due to behavior but I'm not sure what Disney's stance is. I wouldn't worry too much now - its easier to think of what to do afterwards, but the shock of behavior can really throw us off.

I'm glad you enjoyed the rest of your cruise, and I'm very sorry you had to deal with a rude guest.

 

[maryisme]

Sorry you had to deal with that. I think you handled it extremely well. How bizarre!

 

[engle]

Ew...I have nothing else to say. Some people....ew.

 

[Prose]

I was on the same cruise, and now I am DYING to know who this crazy person was...I ran into a couple of real complainers, but nothing compared to this!

 

[Medic193]

I was on this same cruise and had a run in with a woman. I decided to just bite my lip and walk away. I felt sorry for her, honestly.

Prose, I saw you mention about being on the Ketchikan White Pass where you saw a bear on the way back. I think I was on that bus with you. I sat on the right side, about the middle of the bus. On the train I was on the right side a few rows from the back. Was there with my 2 girls and wife (Asian). I was outside at the back of the car most of the trip taking pictures.

 

[Prose]

Medic, I think we may have been close to you on the bus! I was the woman with dark red curly hair, with a very tall man with dark hair and a blond tween girl in a hoodie. That bear was a highlight of the day!

 

[MrsScooby]

malonefamily I think you handled the situation just right

What a nutjob She is obviously a sad and disturbed person and really more deserving of pity than anything else. A normal adult does not behave that way.

I think nicknaming her "grumpy" and trying to laugh about it as much as possible is the way to go

 

[PrincessTrisha]

I found Grumpy on the Disney Wonder's Alaskan sailing from June 7th, and I'm afraid it wasn't with Snow White. My family was watching DisneyNature African Cats in the Buena Vista theater waiting to pull into Ketchikan (it was nearly my 3 year old's nap time) while holding and barely rocking him to sleep. Just as he was dozing off there was a BIG (hard as she could manage I would guess) kick against the back of the seat. I ignored it assuming she had fallen or something, but a moment later she began screaming at me for moving. Yikes.

It was so bizarre. When she yelled I turned and said, "I'm just rocking the baby to sleep, and didn't intend to bother you." She said it "hurt her knees" (now I'm about 6 feet tall and my knees didn't touch the seat in front of me, so I don't know what her story was - in a million years I never would have guessed the tiny movement we made would bother anyone - it was surely better than a fussy preschooler!). Then I finally realized that she'd just kicked us, and very, very hard (such an odd thing it took me a while to realize that's what had happened). So I said, "Did you kick us on purpose then?" And she said "Yes." Everyone in the central part of the theater just sort of turned in shock to look at her. I said simply, "Wow" and turned around and tried to hold very still for the last 40 minutes of the show, with a now wide awake and fussy 3 year old I probably should have just left.

After the movie was over I told her crossly that if she kicked me or one of my children again she could explain it to Disney security, and she took off. Here's the question for more experienced cruisers: How should I have dealt with this? Should I have called security at the time? Should I have ignored it? Moved to another seat mid-show in a crowded theater? If I had snapped an iPhone picture of her and taken it to security would they have acted on it?

I resisted the urge to complain to anyone at Guest Services (I've heard complaints about other passengers are their most common headache, and what can they really do about that?). I just feel like I didn't handle it in the best possible way. We had a great time anyway, but I won't deny that it took a few hours to shake off that unpleasant experience.

I know this won't make me popular on these boards, but here goes......

There are two sides to every story.

She kicked your chair not you or your kids and from her perspective you were being inconsiderate by rocking back and forth in your chair because it was hitting her knees. Just because your knees didn't come anywhere near the next row of seats doesn't mean hers didn't.

Then you very loudly (because everyone in the centre part of the theatre turned so it was obviously more than a whisper) make an inaccurate statement (Did you just kick us on purpose? - instead of Did you just kick my chair on purpose?) and disturb the viewing of the movie for several patrons.

And you admit to keeping a fussy 3 year old in the theatre for the next 40 minutes.

I think a more adult way to handle it would be to say, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize that I was banging your knees. I'll stop rocking. People are reasonable and if you had just told me in the beginning, I would have stopped rocking right away. You didn't need to kick my chair."

And then if you needed to continue to rock your child, you could have moved to another seat where there was no one sitting behind you, since you would be aware that your rocking may cause discomfort for anyone sitting behind you.

 

[Cruise]

I know this won't make me popular on these boards, but here goes......

I'm sure I'll be flamed as well, but... if you knew it was your 3 year old's nap time, why would you take him into the theater in the first place? You yourself said that he was fussy (granted, it was after this occurred, but...), so wouldn't the polite thing to do for everyone else in the theater be to actually take him back to the cabin for the nap that he probably desperately wanted?

There's no argument that the woman behind you was rude... but from her (and probably several other peoples') perspective, so were you.

 

[malonefamily]

There are two sides to every story.

Aha, so it was you PrincessTrisha! Just kidding.

I appreciate your honest thoughts. As I said, I didn't walk away feeling too great about the situation, and wanted other perspectives.

re: inconsiderate rocking - This was definitely how she saw it, but for what it's worth, it's not like I made the conscious decision to risk annoying anyone. The little bitty, slow rocking motion I was making was quite trivial- it took me a while to realize that's what was upsetting this lady, even though she said as much, it took time to compute due to the shock. I would never intentionally bother anyone, or do things that even might bother anyone. I thought this was well below the threshold of things that might anger anybody.

re: very loudly responding to her. I was a good deal quieter than she was, and I was just responding to her. It is true that asking her if she "kicked us on purpose" could be construed as misleading, but I was literally forming the words as they occurred to me. When I first turned, I had no idea what was going on...

re: keeping the fussy 3 year old in the movie. Yeah, this was probably a mistake. He wasn't really all that bad, but he would have rather left, and I'm sure he was at least a slight distraction. I'll remind you he was basically asleep and content until the infamous kicking incident. I guess I'll admit that I partly didn't want to leave because that was exactly what this awful woman wanted. Pretty petty thinking... angry people don't always make the smart choice I guess, or at least I didn't.

 

[malonefamily]

I'm sure I'll be flamed as well, but... if you knew it was your 3 year old's nap time, why would you take him into the theater in the first place? You yourself said that he was fussy (granted, it was after this occurred, but...), so wouldn't the polite thing to do for everyone else in the theater be to actually take him back to the cabin for the nap that he probably desperately wanted?

My three year old never wants a nap...

Actually, the problem with nap time - we were stuck with the 8:15pm dinner time, and were trying our best to adjust the little guy's sleep schedule. Where at home he wakes up at 6:30am, naps from 11:30-12:30 and goes to bed by 8:00pm, on the ship we were trying to push everything back at least an hour. It was pretty much working. The movie started at 11 or 11:30 that day, a bit too early for the nap time we were operating with. I figured it was a 50/50 chance he'd fall asleep during the show, or if not, I'd take him to the stateroom and let the rest of the family take a first peek at Ketchikan while I relaxed on the veranda until he woke. Anyhow, he wasn't much better or worse than your typical 3 year old in a movie theater that day (which isn't necessarily a very high bar... lol).

 

[LAWalz23]

Aha, so it was you PrincessTrisha! Just kidding.

I appreciate your honest thoughts. As I said, I didn't walk away feeling too great about the situation, and wanted other perspectives.

re: inconsiderate rocking - This was definitely how she saw it, but for what it's worth, it's not like I made the conscious decision to risk annoying anyone. The little bitty, slow rocking motion I was making was quite trivial- it took me a while to realize that's what was upsetting this lady, even though she said as much, it took time to compute due to the shock. I would never intentionally bother anyone, or do things that even might bother anyone. I thought this was well below the threshold of things that might anger anybody.

re: very loudly responding to her. I was a good deal quieter than she was, and I was just responding to her. It is true that asking her if she "kicked us on purpose" could be construed as misleading, but I was literally forming the words as they occurred to me. When I first turned, I had no idea what was going on...

re: keeping the fussy 3 year old in the movie. Yeah, this was probably a mistake. He wasn't really all that bad, but he would have rather left, and I'm sure he was at least a slight distraction. I'll remind you he was basically asleep and content until the infamous kicking incident. I guess I'll admit that I partly didn't want to leave because that was exactly what this awful woman wanted. Pretty petty thinking... angry people don't always make the smart choice I guess, or at least I didn't.

The woman could have tapped you on the shoulder and asked you to stop rocking. By kicking at your seat she was the one that made something small into a larger issue.