Financial nightmare UPDATE!!!!!!

[PatMcDuck]

I was sort of glad (and sad) to see this post. We are also in a mess with credit card debt triggered (mostly) by a very ill child. We have another child that is handicapped, but it was when the youngest went thru a long complicated illness, I had to stop working almost completely. With frequent treatments and appointments, I am still mostly out of work. DH missed 3 months of work in 2007 as well.

We are about to take out a line of credit to erase the CC debt. We WILL sell the house in about 2 years. Youngest will then be out of high school at least. Then we will downsize gladly, relocate, etc. We would not be able to sell our house now anyway, when I drive around all I SEE are for sale signs. Our cars are old, over 150,000 miles. We mow our own lawn, we do our our repairs if we can. There is so little (union)construction work now, DH is working and living in Las Vegas while we are in NJ.

Some people are in a financial mess because they went crazy buying things. Other people are in mess for other reasons........

 

[SweetPeasMom2]

I don't have a solution but just felt the need to tell you aren't alone. We are in a lot of cc debt. I know the feeling of the endless spiral. Just wanted to give you big hugs.

 

[LSchrow]

Some people are in a financial mess because they went crazy buying things. Other people are in mess for other reasons........

and those "other people" should not feel at all ashamed or embarrassed because they did important things with what money they had....pride & integrity are the words that come to mind when people try their hardest, & the "bump in the road" almost takes them down......

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Hey, Obsessed you're back!

I think she meant that you were gone for a while after the whole banckruptcy/Escalade/Disney trips/Disney Cruise stuff from a few weeks back.

sure, followed by your own bankruptcy filing.
So, how's the planning for the next Disney trip going, now that you are "debt free" ????

I was sort of glad (and sad) to see this post. We are also in a mess with credit card debt triggered (mostly) by a very ill child. We have another child that is handicapped, but it was when the youngest went thru a long complicated illness, I had to stop working almost completely. With frequent treatments and appointments, I am still mostly out of work. DH missed 3 months of work in 2007 as well.

We are about to take out a line of credit to erase the CC debt. We WILL sell the house in about 2 years. Youngest will then be out of high school at least. Then we will downsize gladly, relocate, etc. We would not be able to sell our house now anyway, when I drive around all I SEE are for sale signs. Our cars are old, over 150,000 miles. We mow our own lawn, we do our our repairs if we can. There is so little (union)construction work now, DH is working and living in Las Vegas while we are in NJ.

Some people are in a financial mess because they went crazy buying things. Other people are in mess for other reasons........

I'm really sorry Pat, so are some tough choices to have to make.

 

[BBGirl]

I will be the lone voice and say talk to a bankruptcy lawyer.

Bankruptcy is there for people that have been put in your situation, loss income, illness, etc.
$65,000 is a lot of money. You guys are already working 2 jobs each. You can only be stretched so thin.

I would think long and hard about the refi, just because of the housing market right now.
That is why I suggest just talking to a bankruptcy lawyer. Doesn't mean you have to file, just see what your options are.

I know people look at people who file as evil or people who don't know how to manage their money. That isn't always the case.
I had a good friend who had to file, after her loser of a ex-husband left her with a lot of debt. I even went with her to the lawyer. I helped her research debt help and bankruptcy. I learned a lot. Yes, there are some people who abuse the system, but there are people there who need it and should be able to file without the shame.

I am not saying you need to file, but I would suggest talking to a lawyer. They will usually do the first meeting for free. The good lawyers will tell you honestly if you should file or not.
There are a few options with bankruptcy also, one is where you pay back X amount of your debt and then it is done.

You really should look into all options openly including bankruptcy and then decide what is right for YOUR family.

GOOD LUCK!!

Not the lone. I say the same thing. Talk to a bankruptcy lawyer before you refi. Don't wait do it NOW. You could rearrage the furniture on the Titanic but it would still sink. That is all you are doing with all this other stuff, just rearraging it. DO NOT refi your house to pay off credit card bills. It's not the right choice.

 

[rebe1968]

Try www.fixmyuglycredit.com...I feel for you i was in your shoes as well and it's not easy...I hope and wish you the very best

 

[mumom95]

nevermind, shouldn't have written what I did, was in a bad mood

 

[2Monkeys]

I am really shocked that so many people are advising bankruptcy. About 7 years ago, we had about $40k in credit card debt and refinanced our house to pay it off. Now because of the downturn in the market, if we sold our house right now, we would have no equity - but we also do not have the credit card debt. Looking back, I'm glad we chose refinancing. We were throwing money down the drain on cc interest and making no headway with the debt. If you plan to stay in your house and can comfortably make the new payment, I would definitely refinance. Bankruptcy affects your credit for many years, and could adversly affect your husband's business. If you think you might want to sell your home in the next couple of years, a refi is probably not a good idea. Just remember that bankruptcy affects your credit for 7 years, whereas promptly paying your mortgage on time will make your credit score better. Good luck to you!

 

[DVCJEN]

I am really shocked that so many people are advising bankruptcy. About 7 years ago, we had about $40k in credit card debt and refinanced our house to pay it off. Now because of the downturn in the market, if we sold our house right now, we would have no equity - but we also do not have the credit card debt. Looking back, I'm glad we chose refinancing. We were throwing money down the drain on cc interest and making no headway with the debt. If you plan to stay in your house and can comfortably make the new payment, I would definitely refinance. Bankruptcy affects your credit for many years, and could adversly affect your husband's business. If you think you might want to sell your home in the next couple of years, a refi is probably not a good idea. Just remember that bankruptcy affects your credit for 7 years, whereas promptly paying your mortgage on time will make your credit score better. Good luck to you!

You make some good points. And Bankruptcy can stay on even longer that 7 years--the impact won't be on your score but they can show on the report for 10+ . We had an applicant last week whos CH 7 from 1997 was still showing on the report!

 

[DiznEeyore]

I think she meant that you were gone for a while after the whole banckruptcy/Escalade/Disney trips/Disney Cruise stuff from a few weeks back.

That's exactly what I meant.

 

[Mary2e]

If you have not done this, you should.

When you call the credit card companies ask to speak to a supervisor. Get names and direct phone numbers if possible. If a supervisor will not lower your rates, ask to speak with their manager.

Tell them your situation and mention that you are considering filing for bankruptcy. Let them know this will be necessary if you cannot get the rates lowered to a "normal, non-penalty" rate. This will scare them as if you file bankruptcy they will be out all of the money.

This will not work. Credit card debt can no longer be discharged in the most common forms of bankruptcy. You have the debt for life. The law was changed by congress about 3 or 4 years ago after heavy lobbying by the credit card companies.

 

[rentayenta]

I agree that you should talk to a bankruptcy atty. Fully educate yourself on what filing vs refi would mean and go from there. I wish you the best.

 

[Irin997]

I am really shocked that so many people are advising bankruptcy. About 7 years ago, we had about $40k in credit card debt and refinanced our house to pay it off. Now because of the downturn in the market, if we sold our house right now, we would have no equity - but we also do not have the credit card debt. Looking back, I'm glad we chose refinancing. We were throwing money down the drain on cc interest and making no headway with the debt. If you plan to stay in your house and can comfortably make the new payment, I would definitely refinance. Bankruptcy affects your credit for many years, and could adversly affect your husband's business. If you think you might want to sell your home in the next couple of years, a refi is probably not a good idea. Just remember that bankruptcy affects your credit for 7 years, whereas promptly paying your mortgage on time will make your credit score better. Good luck to you!

Hey, I've posted about this twice. It really makes zero sense to file bankruptcy if they plan on staying in the house longer than 5 years. In addition to the fact that their credit will not be trashed but will be improving and they will feel good about the fact that they paid off their own debt. But both of my posts were skipped over.

 

[mommytoone]

My mom just got in contact with a credit consolidating company that is willing to help her for only like $49 to join. She pays about $238 a month for a specific debt. Stepfather was not workng for 8 mos and got behind had to use CC to live. They by no means live outside theri budget, they don't even have health insurance because can't afford the extra money. I will get the info from her and forward to you. It's atleast worth a shot. She was going to file bankruptcy but did this instead and will be debt free in 4 years. They even talk to the CC company so you don't have to. Don't feel alone, I know lots of people swimming in debt. Good Luck

 

[luvintink7]

We were about to sign those papers this week for the refi but you guys have given me alot to think about. I am first looking into the credit couseling option. My DH is VERY much against filing bankrupcy. He is afraid we will lose our assets including some of the equipment for his business. We have friends that filed bankrupcy about 2 years ago and they went through hell. They had to sell their house, their boat, and they are still renting. That really scares us. Anyone out there have experience with bankrupcy?

 

[DiznEeyore]

We were about to sign those papers this week for the refi but you guys have given me alot to think about. I am first looking into the credit couseling option. My DH is VERY much against filing bankrupcy. He is afraid we will lose our assets including some of the equipment for his business. We have friends that filed bankrupcy about 2 years ago and they went through hell. They had to sell their house, their boat, and they are still renting. That really scares us. Anyone out there have experience with bankrupcy?

iVillage has a really excellent Debt Q&A/Bankruptcy board that you might find helpful:

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/listsf.asp?webtag=iv-mldebtqa&nav=start

Good luck deciding how to proceed -- I really hope things work out for you!

 

[luvintink7]

DH just put a whole new spin on our situation. I had forgot to mention one detail about our situation. We currenly have a ballon on our mortgage. We have one year left and our mortgage rate will become an adjustable rate. This is an important factor to think about. The refi guy has locked us in for 45 days at 5.875%. Does this change anyone's advice? I am just so anti-bankrupcy that I can't even bring myself to call an attorney about it. I really don't want to ruin my credit by using a credit counselor. I just don't know what to do. Everyone's advice sounds so good..but I am soooo overwhelmed and so afraid.

 

[hinodis]

I am so sorry to hear about your dilemma. Just remember that seeking information about a bankrupcy or credit counseling does mean you are choosing that alternative. You are just going to be getting information, not committing to take action. I would suggest you learn about all your options so you can make an informed decision. Good Luck.

 

[Suz D]

I am so sorry to hear about your dilemma. Just remember that seeking information about a bankrupcy or credit counseling does mean you are choosing that alternative. You are just going to be getting information, not committing to take action. I would suggest you learn about all your options so you can make an informed decision. Good Luck.

hinodis I think you meant to say that seeking information does NOT mean you are choosing that alternative. Good input from you on that. Information gives power and control.

OP, I would say with a rate of 5.875 and the whole balloon thing I would refi.

 

[hinodis]

hinodis I think you meant to say that seeking information does NOT mean you are choosing that alternative. Good input from you on that. Information gives power and control.

OP, I would say with a rate of 5.875 and the whole balloon thing I would refi.

YES, thanks for catching that!