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Fear Of Flying

Monkeyfeet

Mouseketeer
Joined
Oct 24, 2006
Before kids, I never thought twice about flying. It did not bother me at all. Now I have mini panic attacks in the weeks leading up to flying and the day of flying. I do take Xanax the day of but that does not totally help. I worry about everything from hitting an air pocket to a wing tearing off. We fly again on the 22nd. Any suggestions to help?
 
See a therapist, talk through the reasons, rationalize them (fears are irrational) so you can face them.

I'm against drugs/alcohol to combat fears.
 
My DH is also afraid of flying. I find that scheduling our flights for early in the morning seems to help deal with at least some of the anticipation on the day of the flight. I also book non-stop flights if there are any available. So we are managing his exposure to the stressor as much as possible.
 
My DH is also afraid of flying. I find that scheduling our flights for early in the morning seems to help deal with at least some of the anticipation on the day of the flight. I also book non-stop flights if there are any available. So we are managing his exposure to the stressor as much as possible.

That is exactly what we like to do (going), coming home is a different story...we always book the latest flight out, just to give us more time to play before we have to head home. With that said, I too am afraid of flying. I used to be really bad with my fears, but since we have been going to Disney a lot more often (the past 2 years we have gone twice in a year), so I guess I am a bit more used to it. What I do is whenever we get into some turbulence or hear weird noises, I always look at the flight attendants and if they seem to be fine and calm, and still pushing the drink cart, then I feel a lot better. Also, we have started sitting towards the front of the plane, this seems to help out a lot as well.
 


As I am getting older(44 next month), my irrational fear of flying is getting worse. I am a fan of taking drugs when they are needed, so I also take Xanax for the days I fly. I don't worry about passing the fears onto my kids. The 2 that are almost 18 and 15 just laugh at me and my 8 year old loves flying so my fear doesn't bother her at all. We are leaving next Sat(the 20th), so I am getting more anxious as the weeks go by, but the bottom line is that I would rather live with the fear, get on the plane and be in the best place on Earth in 2 hours than sitting in a car for 18 to 20 hours listening to my kids fight. I like flying Jet Blue so I can watch TV and try to forget I am on a plane. You will be fine.

Lisa
 
Before kids, I never thought twice about flying. It did not bother me at all. Now I have mini panic attacks in the weeks leading up to flying and the day of flying. I do take Xanax the day of but that does not totally help. I worry about everything from hitting an air pocket to a wing tearing off. We fly again on the 22nd. Any suggestions to help?

Don't know if you have an ipod touch or iPhone but there's an app from Virgin Atlantic called fear of flying. It's about $5 and it takes you through all of the various aspects of a flight. It also has a series of relaxation exercises and panic attack routines. I found it pretty helpful. I use the relaxation exercises even when traveling by train. It really takes your mind off things.
 
Before kids, I never thought twice about flying. It did not bother me at all. Now I have mini panic attacks in the weeks leading up to flying and the day of flying. I do take Xanax the day of but that does not totally help. I worry about everything from hitting an air pocket to a wing tearing off. We fly again on the 22nd. Any suggestions to help?

IMO, follow the suggestion below, or drive. Although if it's March 22nd that you fly, I think I would have checked into some suggestions a wee bit earlier since you know it's an issue.

See a therapist, talk through the reasons, rationalize them (fears are irrational) so you can face them.

I'm against drugs/alcohol to combat fears.
 


Another Xanax-taker here. I absolutely HATE to fly, but don't want to lose the time involved in other forms of transportation (driving, train.) I only take Xanax for the flights, but I haven't found it as helpful the last one or two trips. Initially, I would take it prior to boarding and would nod off right after take-off. I'm not taking a minimal dose either..1.5 mg. last trip (with my doctor's okay.) I think I might need heavy duty anesthesia:confused3
 
I also watch the flight attendants to make sure everything seems normal; I check-out my fellow passengers to make sure no one looks like something is out of the norm. Don't know what I'd do if the attendants made a beeline for their seats..probably start a panic. This is part of the reason I always pre-pay for my seating..if I'm going to jump out of my skin, I prefer to do it next to my husband, not a stranger.
 
Another Xanax-taker here. I absolutely HATE to fly, but don't want to lose the time involved in other forms of transportation (driving, train.) I only take Xanax for the flights, but I haven't found it as helpful the last one or two trips. Initially, I would take it prior to boarding and would nod off right after take-off. I'm not taking a minimal dose either..1.5 mg. last trip (with my doctor's okay.) I think I might need heavy duty anesthesia:confused3

I also watch the flight attendants to make sure everything seems normal; I check-out my fellow passengers to make sure no one looks like something is out of the norm. Don't know what I'd do if the attendants made a beeline for their seats..probably start a panic. This is part of the reason I always pre-pay for my seating..if I'm going to jump out of my skin, I prefer to do it next to my husband, not a stranger.

IMO, I'd rather have a clear head in an emergency situation if it were to happen versus being on something that may impair my decisions. This reinforces my opinion to avoid drugs/alcohol.
 
I am a big fan of education. Knowing how a plane is built and flies gives you lots of power.

I checked online for one of my favorites -"21st Century Jet - Making the Boeing 777 ", a PBS special which chronicles the design, building, and testing of the 777. It is available on youtube.

One thing you mentioned was a fear of the wings coming off. One segment of this show details how they test the strength of the wings. They are designed to naturally flex, but this video gives you an idea of how strong these wings are and how much they can flex! I could not believe how much stress they can withstand.

Also, check out fromthecockpit.com. Captain Meryl answers many questions about all aspects of flyng.
 
IMO, I'd rather have a clear head in an emergency situation if it were to happen versus being on something that may impair my decisions. This reinforces my opinion to avoid drugs/alcohol.

Pretty good point. Never really thought about that.
 
I never used to mind flying and did it quite frequently, but then I had two horrible flights back to back. (I'll spare y'all the details). It scarred me. Anyway, I still fly regularly, but have found that staying up really late the night before (I'm usually still packing and preparing things anyway) and then taking a regular dramamine (not non-drowsy formula!) as I board works great...I'm out like a light. But can still be roused in an emergency.

Hugs to all the scared flyers out there!
 
I do Xanax also. For me, it's not so much the fear that something will happen to the plane but fear of being trapped in a confining space for several hours. I've had panic attacks on planes and the xanax helps to calm the panic so I can fly. If Xanax isn't helping you, then I suggest you talk to your doctor about an alternative choice to help you. A therapist might be of help but that's a long term solution and seeing as your flying out soon that probably won't help much now but something to think about when you get back perhaps. Distraction helped me...bring an ipod or a portable dvd player, a good book if you can concentrate...I can't concetrate on reading when I'm flying but the dvd player worked great for me. There are a lot of good websites that deal with this issue and have good tips...just google and peruse until you find some that will work for you. Oh, and avoid caffeine and sugar, I've found that those two things increase my anxiety and make the panic or fears worse. Good luck!
 
Distraction helped me...bring an ipod or a portable dvd player, a good book if you can concentrate...I can't concetrate on reading when I'm flying but the dvd player worked great for me.

This really helped me too. I would intentionally save a few of my favorite TV shows for when I have to travel. Sometimes a movie can take longer than you'd like so a 1 hour show was perfect for most of my flights. Dexter, Mad Men and True Blood really took my mind off of flying.
 
I do no have a fear of flying, but...I must admit, once my beverage is gone, I sit back, close my eyes and pray...not, for me but for those I know need it...takes care of many people who need uplifted...try it...it works or should I say, God works:) Good luck, BTW, I am going on a cruise next April and I have a big FEAR of water....go figure..let me know please how you make out...please...and thank you.
 
BTW, I am going on a cruise next April and I have a big FEAR of water....

I was on a cruise last year too and had a slight fear of the water too. We had a room with a balcony and I just kept imagining what whould happen if I accidentally fell over the railing. They just seem so unsafe to me. It didn't ruin my trip but I did not spend as much time out on the balcony as I thought I would. It was kind of like looking down from a tall building and knowing if you fell it would be game over...
 
I'm another one that didn't used to have a problem flying but hate it now.

My tips:

1. I ALWAYS get a window seat. If I can see the ground, I feel better.

2. I look on yahoo maps aerial view before I go and try to map out the general route my plane will be taking from my home to my destination. I look at the rivers, bays, big cities, anything that I might be able to recognize from the sky. If I have an idea of where I'm at and how much farther I have to go, I feel better.

3. I bring my MP3 BUT I don't listen to downloaded music. I turn it on the radio setting and listen to whatever radio station I can pick up. It's kind of cool to hear "this is kxyz in Shreveport" or "this is wxyz in Tallahassee". Again, if I have an idea of where I'm at and how much farther I have to go, I feel better.

4. BRING SNACKS!! I'm a stress eater and if I can snack throughout the flight, I feel better.
 
We often see these posts on this board. And I like to make the same comment I always do. I, for one have no fear of flying but I have a slight fear of bridges (similar to the fear of cruise ship/water fear). While irrational, fear of flying is a real phobia and I agree the best way to deal with it is with some therapy.

Now, there are others…my wife for example, who have no fear of flying (she is fine once she gets on the plane) but hates to fly, gets anxious before trips and tries to avoid it at all costs. She has a fear of dying. Not that there is anything wrong with fearing death, but when you compare flying to other things you do, it is completely illogical as statistically, flying is safer than many many things. You have a better chance of being killed by a vending machine than killed in a flight. That is right. More people die getting a snack than flying. So if you are going be afraid to die on a plane, you better not go get a Snickers for you 2:30 snack.

It is similar to playing the lottery – illogical. But people do it. I love that eTrade commercial with the baby…"you have a better chance of being mauled by a polar bear and a regular bear in the same day.”

After dozens of flights, last February, we finally drove to FL for the adventure. My wife had no “fear” at all driving down there – huge semi’s rolling by you on i95 at 80mph, yeah, that is much safer. We all know the statistics between highway deaths and airline deaths. But she is already making comments about our flight in August wishing we could drive again instead…
 

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