Embarrassing Misunderstandings

[bdcp]

My nephew, when he was about 5 announced to his class that his daddy shoots people. His daddy was a secret service agent and carried a weapon. BTW, he never shot anyone and my nephew is now 24 and married. On my youngest son's first day of first grade, one of the teachers was going by a different last name than she had been. From Mrs. Brown to Ms. something. The parents were talking about it and someone said maybe she got divorced. My oldest son piped up when I was talking to her and asked her if she got divorced. I don't think she heard it completely but I explained that he had overheard people wondering about the name change. Turned out there were 3 Mrs. Brown's in the school and they were trying to prevent confusion so two of them changed their name for the kids to call them. My boys are 35 and almost 38 now and I'm sure there are more stories, but I did learn to be careful when someone (or me) was gossiping because those are the things kids remember.

 

[disneychrista]

When my daughters were in preschool, they would call cocoa puff (well the generic version we bought) "dog food." Well one morning my daughter shares with her teacher that she had dog food for breakfast.

 

[diznygirl]

When my son was in daycare he would repeat a line from Cat in the Hat: Sit, sit sit. You know how it sounded!!!

 

[luvsvacation]

When my little brother was 4 he fell at the playground and hit the back of his head on a retaining wall. He was bleeding quite a bit and crying but my mom had gotten him calmed down. It was decided that they needed to take him to the hospital for stitches. As soon as this was mentioned my brother became hysterical. He was screaming in the car on the way. My mom kept trying to calm him, telling him how at the hospital they would help him and give him some stitches so he could feel better. Finally completely hysterical he screams “No, don’t let them put my head in the sewing machine!” Poor kid had seen my mom sew lots of times and he though his head was going into a giant sewing machine when he heard stitches.

 

[Kennywood]

Back in the 50's, women still wore stockings. My mom went to the store and took my brother along. He sat in the stroller while my mom looked at various items. For reassurance that our mom was still there, my brother would occasionally reach out for our mom. He apparently liked the feel of nylon. All of sudden, a nearby woman YELPED! Mom turned around and there was my brother rubbing his hand up and down the back of a stranger's leg.

 

[Breezy_Carol]

When DS was about 4, we were at church on Easter Sunday. We were taking the elevator up to the sanctuary when one of the pastors got in with us. She asked DS what he got in his Easter basket, and he replied in a disgusted voice "I got a Bible."

 

[TeresaBelle]

My little brother once announced to all the kids at the playground that his dad smoked top spelled backwards! This was the mid-80's.

 

[kerry1379]

When my oldest was very young and not quite able to yet pronounce all of his letters (in this particular case, W), we were at the grocery checkout during the Halloween season. The person checking us out was a nice lady with a festive pin on her shirt of a witch flying on a broom. My son got very excited, pointed at the lady's pin and loudly exclaimed "Witch! Witch!" Only the W came out sounding like a B. I knew what he was trying to say-my little guy LOVED Halloween stuff! I tried explaining and apologizing, but I got quite the glare from her.

 

[dez1978]

When my son was in daycare he would repeat a line from Cat in the Hat: Sit, sit sit. You know how it sounded!!!

When my oldest was 3 the song Uptown Funk was his favorite. He'd be in the back seat belting out Uptown "word that did not sound like funk". Or in the grocery store in the cart randomly singing at the top of his lungs as preschoolers do... "Uptown "Did not sound like Funk" you up, Uptown ... You up!!! At least it was a popular enough song most people knew about it.

 

[belle032]

We were raised Catholic and I remember my brother had just started going to communion in church. So we had all just gone up to take communion and come back to the pews to sit down. My brother got this disgusted look on his face and loudly announced to everyone within earshot "Jesus tastes really stale today!" My parents could NOT hold it together for the rest of the service. We still bring up that story!

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

We were raised Catholic and I remember my brother had just started going to communion in church. So we had all just gone up to take communion and come back to the pews to sit down. My brother got this disgusted look on his face and loudly announced to everyone within earshot "Jesus tastes really stale today!" My parents could NOT hold it together for the rest of the service. We still bring up that story!

My mom loves to tell the story that when I was younger I would say "Jesus Christ" (I was in CCD classes and so that was on my mind) and of course that's NOT normally something appropriate so me being me I followed it with "died for our sins" when I got the mom look

 

[2letterwords]

My mother-in-law is an actor. When her stepdaughter was young, she said that she saw her stepmother (my MIL) "in the TV." The school was unaware of MIL's profession and called them in for a possible psych evaluation.

 

[Piglet843]

We were having Christmas dinner with extended family we only see the one time a year.
The Wife is about 10 years older than me, and she was pregnant at the time.
I had not yet had any kids but was trying to stay in the conversation.

I was trying to tell her the story of a Coworker who had not had luck seeing her baby's sex on
the last ultrasound because baby's hand kept getting in the way.
What I ended up saying was "the coworker couldn't see the sex
because it had its hand down there... but not like touching itself or anything... just.... I mean... umm... " *die*

Ugg... I still cringe every time I think of this or are around this family... why did I say that..

 

[dez1978]

We were having Christmas dinner with extended family we only see the one time a year.
The Wife is about 10 years older than me, and she was pregnant at the time.
I had not yet had any kids but was trying to stay in the conversation.

I was trying to tell her the story of a Coworker who had not had luck seeing her baby's sex on
the last ultrasound because baby's hand kept getting in the way.
What I ended up saying was "the coworker couldn't see the sex
because it had its hand down there... but not like touching itself or anything... just.... I mean... umm... " *die*

Ugg... I still cringe every time I think of this or are around this family... why did I say that..

See I'd have just listened to your story and responded something like " well obviously it must have been a boy!" you know, because men always have their hands in their pants ala Al Bundy Style.

 

[Sleepy425]

I was once going over a patient's medical history, and he had an accent. He told me his ***** burst, and I proceeded to question him about recovery and such....afterwards I walked out of the room looking horrified and my coworker informed he had said his APPENDIX burst.

 

[klmall]

When I was young my mom rarely took my brother and I into department stores other than Penney's and Wards so it was always a treat to go to Hecht's (like today's Macy's) with all it's displays and big candy counter. Of course, my 3 year old brother was determined to make Mom stop and buy him some candy so she had to drag him away screaming at the top of his lungs "But Mom you haven't fed me for days!" She was highly embarrassed but I remember at least one other adult smiling as we hurried out of the store.

 

[RUDisney]

When I was young my mom rarely took my brother and I into department stores other than Penney's and Wards so it was always a treat to go to Hecht's (like today's Macy's) with all it's displays and big candy counter. Of course, my 3 year old brother was determined to make Mom stop and buy him some candy so she had to drag him away screaming at the top of his lungs "But Mom you haven't fed me for days!" She was highly embarrassed but I remember at least one other adult smiling as we hurried out of the store.

OMG! That's funny! "You haven't fed me for days!"

I'm sure that the candy counter didn't give away this obvious fib.

 

[BrianL]

When I was young my mom rarely took my brother and I into department stores other than Penney's and Wards so it was always a treat to go to Hecht's (like today's Macy's) with all it's displays and big candy counter. Of course, my 3 year old brother was determined to make Mom stop and buy him some candy so she had to drag him away screaming at the top of his lungs "But Mom you haven't fed me for days!" She was highly embarrassed but I remember at least one other adult smiling as we hurried out of the store.

I pulled one on my mom like that when I was about 10 or 11. We were in a department store and I was kind of roaming around with my mom staying close. I turned aound and shoulded, "Hey, lady, will you quit following me!" I thought it was hillarious. Actually, my mom does too now, but maybe not so much then. We left the mall before anyone called the police!